Kenji spent the next hour sitting cross-legged on his mattress, navigating the blue holographic interface with the focus of a pro-gamer optimizing his build.
"Status... Skills... Inventory..." he mumbled, swiping his small hand through the air. "Now, where is the shop? Show me the goods."
[System Shop Opened]
Rows of glowing icons appeared. Kenji's eyes went straight to the top of the list, the "God Tier" section. His jaw dropped, and then immediately clenched in frustration.
Saiyan Bloodline (Pure): 100,000,000 SP
Senju Wood Release Template (Full Power): 20,000,000 SP
Rinnegan (Pair): 50,000,000 SP
Mangekyo Sharingan (Eternal): 5,000,000 SP (Requirement: Must own Uchiha Bloodline - 1,000,000 SP)Gura Gura no Mi (Tremor-Tremor Fruit): 15,000,000 SP
"One hundred million?!" Kenji choked. "I'm a civilian orphan living on welfare! Even if I streaked naked through the Hokage's office, I wouldn't earn that much!"
He quickly realized the economy of this System was broken. It was Pay-to-Win, except the currency was his dignity.
"What can I actually afford?"
He scrolled down. Past the S-rank jutsus, past the A-rank swords, all the way to the bottom of the list—the "Miscellaneous & Lifestyle" section.
Vibrating Kunai (Silent Mode): 50 SP
X-Ray Goggles (Battery Life: 10 seconds): 200 SP
Aphrodisiac Smoke Bomb (Mild): 75 SP
Icha Icha Paradise (Signed First Edition): 500 SP
Skill: Ten-Finger Massage (Master Level): 1,000 SP
Kenji stared at the disparity. "Why are the tools for world domination impossibly expensive, but the tools for being a degenerate are cheaper than a bowl of ramen?"
It was obvious what path the System wanted him to take. It didn't want a savior. It wanted a menace.
"And then there's this," Kenji sighed, tapping on the [Gacha] tab.
A colorful, flashy wheel appeared, looking suspiciously like a slot machine from a pachinko parlor.
[Lucky Spin: 1,000 SP per Spin]
Grand Prize: Random Bloodline Limit
Common Prize: Random Household Item or consumable.
"I know this trap," Kenji hissed, pointing an accusatory finger at the screen. "I spent half my salary on Genshin Impact in my last life. I know how this works. You spend 10,000 points and get a stick of gum and a pair of used socks. 'Lucky Spin' my ass."
He closed the shop window before the temptation to gamble away his future points set in. Currently, his SP balance sat at a depressed 0.
To buy the Saiyan bloodline, he would effectively have to become the most shameless creature in existence. He'd have to out-pervert Jiraiya.
"Great. Just great."
Suddenly, the screen flickered red.
[DING!]
[New Mission Issued: The Debut]
Kenji straightened up. "Here we go. The first real step."
[Mission Objective: The First Impression]
Location: Konoha Ninja Academy Entrance Ceremony.
Details: The Academy is the cradle of the Will of Fire. It is where legends begin. As a future legend, you must ensure no one forgets your name.
Task: Make a memorable impression on the instructors and students during the introduction phase.
Success Condition: The "Awkwardness Level" of the room must exceed 80%.
Reward: Transformation Jutsu (Henge) - [Proficiency: MAX].
Failure Penalty: For the next 24 hours, you will involuntarily moan "Harder, Daddy" whenever you take physical damage, including stubbing your toe.
Time Limit: Until the end of the Ceremony.
Kenji read the penalty twice. A cold sweat broke out on his forehead.
"If I fail... and I stub my toe during training..." He imagined the scene. Iruka-sensei throwing a chalk at him, him getting hit, and moaning in front of the entire class.
"That's social suicide. That's worse than death. I have to succeed."
But the reward...
Kenji's eyes narrowed. Transformation Jutsu at MAX proficiency.
In the anime, Henge was a basic E-rank skill. Most ninjas just used it to look like other people. But a Max Level Henge? That implied physical solidity. It implied maintaining the form for hours. It implied... absolute freedom.
"With a Max Level Transformation," Kenji whispered, rubbing his chin, "I could sneak into the women's bathhouse as a towel."
It was a foundational skill for a rogue.
He looked at the clock on the wall. The ceremony started in one hour.
"Make an impression, huh?" Kenji stood up and walked to his closet, pulling out the standard-issue clothes the orphanage provided. He looked at his innocent 6-year-old face in the mirror again.
"Normal kids introduce themselves by saying they want to be Hokage," Kenji mused. "Naruto is going to shout about ramen. Sasuke is going to brood about killing Itachi."
He smirked. It was a crooked, unwholesome smile that didn't belong on a child's face.
"I guess I need to set the bar for 'low standards' right from day one."