He wasn't shocked when an attendant came to meet him saying, King Winter called for his audience.
Thinking about how he reacted to discovering he was Taohua, king winter probably have a lot to say about his personal grievances.
He stayed outside the room, despite the door was left ajar.
"Come inside"
King Winter was sitting beside the window watching the outside, his lips were the same color as his face , his white hair blended with his face , but Instead of giving him a ghastly look , he managed to look like a fragile beauty.
"Sit down"
Bei Shang looked around before sitting down on the bed.
There was a thick silence between them before King Winter raised his hands and start tapping on the window.
"Do… Do you not really remember your past life?"
Bei Shang first nod his head then he shook it.
"I remember some but I don't remember all"
"Do you remember me?"
Bei Shang shook his head.
King Winter sighed and placed his hand on his chin , his eyes looked so far away.
" Primordial demons are created three times, I have never felt as weak as I am now, this is probably my last life" He let out another sigh " I just wanted to know how I could have been in those lives I lived, was I as stupid as I was now? Was I evil or was I kind? If I leave now, would Summer cope with being alone ? He had always hated loneliness "
"All this are questions I have, I don't regret having my children but I wished that instead of being so uninvolved with them , I could have gone out more with them, I don't regret marrying thunder but I wished that I treated her better, I wish I … " His voice choked before he gulped loudly " I wish I could see Summer one more time, tell him I'm sorry for dragging him into my messes and giving him such a hard time "
Demons tend to have intense feelings, sometimes their feelings end up making them do things they regret.
Human tend to have regrets because they have feelings about what they could have done and what they could have changed, it was the same for demons , demons have long lifespan , However , their blinded feelings made them make more mistakes and regret it even more intensely.
So they could only sit down by the windows , wishing they could have done better.
Why can't you choose me ?
Bei Shang held his chest as the familiar pain came again, this time he couldn't stop his eyes from watering.
In the end, there was nothing left to be done than to wallow in bitterness.
Winter didn't notice Bei Shang state , he rubbed his eyes before breathing out.
"You're looking for your memories right?"
Bei Shang nod his head " Yes"
"I know some folklore about you , despite what the gods up there think , folklore tells an element of truth about the particular god. The only thing is to sit down and wonder which one is true and which one are emblishments "
"Why do you want to help me?"
"I don't know…maybe because I just want to redeem myself "
Bei Shang didn't ask anymore questions instead he nod his head up and down in affirmation.
"After Nuwa created the heavens and the earth, she looked at her creation and smiled in happiness. She grabbed some clay and made the first person; this first person turned out to be the Jade emperor of the heavens. Compared to what people think, fuxin actually sat down beside his creator mother and making other clay people. At one point Nuwa and Jade emperor got tired and threw slabs of clay around. Some clay people turned out to be mortals with potential to become gods , other clay people turned out to be mortals, slabs of clay became demons and spirits. The cherry blossom tree where Nuwa sat down to make people, became sentient and managed to become a spirit in 500 years"
Bei Shang could see it , he receiving Nuwa blessing as a tree , his body coming alive and trying to form a core. It wasn't just from the time he followed shu hua to the heavens realm , he had always have that deep seated desire to rise above all mudaness and become a god.
" A goddess seeing the tree spirit took him in and trained him. This tree spirit became beloved and envied alike. Now it was time to choose his path and he choose …"
"The path of the gods" Bei Shang swallowed and started to rub his fingers, his eyes darted to and fro " He was given three tribulations and then he went down to the mortal realm; there he was saved by a fisherman "
"Do you remember what happened after?"
"No .. I only remembered to that point "
"The tree spirit became friends with the governor of the region and helped him in eliminating the demons terrorizing the area , in a few years , he completed the warrior and worshipper tribulation "
Bei Shang could feel a sense of dread starting to bubble up inside him , he swallowed and pinched himself but it only worsened.
"Everyone thought that the tree spirit would pass the last tribulation, after all , he was indifferent to affection, he was indifferent of everything of the world, Divinity was all in his mind but … he couldn't advance; he couldn't overcome the last tribulation "
Don't underestimate the love tribulation; the heavens are not fond of divinities who are irrational.
He can be someone important to me without it necessarily meaning love; I am not like the demons who holds affection so significantly it ruins their life and I am not like the mortals whose affection are frickle and shallow.
"What happened?"
"He fell in love with the fisherman. There are two solutions to this situation. Give up divinity or Kill the fisherman. The tree spirit choose to kill the fisherman "
Bei Shang raised his head sharply "What?!"
"He thought Killing the man will solve it all , however there were still lingering affection, so he still can't…"
"You're lying, I know that Taohua is not a good person but Taohua will never hurt Hong Jin…"
King Winter tinted his head and looked at him.
"What made you think so? You don't remember anyway "
Bei Shang squeezed his fists so tight , it cracked.
"When I saw Nick Storm park for the first time , my heart hurts so much I couldn't breathe , I can never hate Nick despite every fucking thing he did to me , even in times I want to hurt him , I end up hurting myself.."
Bei Shang placed his bloodied palm over his chest.
"Taohua might have not been a great God but he will never hurt Hong Jin"
Winter smiled and continued tapping the window, his eyes turned cold as ice.
"The gods are a cold hearted bunch , they all believe they are above feelings and making stupid decisions… What made you think , you are not like them ?!"
A lamp in the room broke into pieces.
"Was that supposed to be me?"
Bei Shang stood up and turned to leave, his shoulders trembled and his breathing became erratic.
"I am leaving"
He didn't know where he was going to , he just know that he had to go far away from the storm family, far away from Nick Storm park.
The next thing, he started to run , his feet tapping faster than his breathing could catch up.
Whenever he went out of air , he stopped and swallowed air greedily before continuing his aimless escape.
Taohua, why are you always leaving me?!
He tripped on a stone and fell down with his entire body ; his body screamed in pain and his eyes turned red.
"Oh my goodness, are you okay?" He felt someone pull him up and looked at his body ; she brushed his face " Where are you running to? Who is chasing you?"
"I didn't hurt him " Bei Shang mumbled and pushed the lady arm aside "Why wi
ll I hurt him …"
"Are you okay?"
His eyes started to turn , he swallowed a large gulp of air before the world turned black.