Kuch sapne neend mein nahi aate…
wo humein jagte hue bhi sone nahi dete.
Aur mere saath bhi yahi hone laga tha.
Jab wo sir class mein aaye, unhone hume medical life ke baare mein bataya — lekin sirf achhi baatein. Phir unhone hume ek special process karwaya.
Unhone kaha,
"Aankhen band karo… apne mind mein socho tum NEET qualify kar chuke ho… family ke saath khushi mana rahe ho… patakhe phoot rahe hain… white coat pehen kar Calicut Medical College ke courtyard mein chal rahe ho… wahan ki hawa feel karo."
Unhone kaha,
"Agar is process ke dauran aankhon se aansu aa jayein, to samajhna tumhara subconscious mind open ho chuka hai."
Unhone apni didi ke bete ka example diya — jo 4 baar repeat kar chuka tha par qualify nahi kar paya kyunki uska subconscious mind open nahi hua.
Unhone kaha,
"Sirf mehnat kaafi nahi hoti. Tumhara mind bhi ready hona chahiye."
You know, baaki students ke liye yeh sirf motivation tha…
lekin mere liye yeh meri zindagi ka mission ban gaya.
Mere ghar wale mujhe already failure samajhte the. Baar-baar mujhe yaad dilate the ki mere sirf 81% aaye hain. Mujhe unhe proof karna tha ki main kar sakti hoon.
Isliye main roz subah uth kar apne room mein baith kar wo visualization karti thi. Main apne aap ko white coat mein Calicut Medical College ke courtyard mein chalti hui imagine karti thi.
Mujhe logon ko bachana tha. Main apne cousin ko cerebral palsy ki takleef se guzarte hue dekhti thi. Unka pain mujhe apna lagta tha.
Chahe main doctor bani ya nahi, mere mind mein main already doctor ban chuki thi — jo patients ko bachati hai.
Main obsession level tak padhne lagi. Neend kam, padhna zyada.
Phir ek din bus mein khade hote waqt mujhe chakkar aaya. Main bus ke front gate ke paas gir gayi. Mere ankle mein fracture aa gaya.
You know, agar bus ka front door open hota, to shayad main seedha tyre ke neeche aa jaati… shayad main zinda bhi na hoti.
Is fracture ke baad main coaching nahi ja paayi. Ghar par smartphone bhi nahi tha — na mere paas, na meri maa ke paas.
Exam ke sirf 3 mahine baaki the.
Main sirf 2 ghante soti thi, 1 ghanta daily routine ke liye, baaki saara time padhai.
Roz raat 2 baje bhagwan ke saamne baith kar kehti,
"Bhagwan please mujhe NEET qualify karwa do… mujhe doctor banna hai… mujhe logon ko bachana hai."
Exam aaya. Maine exam diya.
Result aaya…
Main qualify nahi hui.
Maine socha ek baar aur try karungi.
Mujhe tab nahi pata tha… agla dard mere sapne se bhi zyada gehra hone wala hai.