Cherreads

The Boyz: Getting Laid

ShamefulChicken
7
chs / week
The average realized release rate over the past 30 days is 7 chs / week.
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Synopsis
Jason, Greg and Sam, three delusional teens, followed a pretty stranger into the dark side of New York for what they thought would be their happiest night ever, when they would finally lose their virginity. But instead, they lost their lives. But death, apparently, was not the end. Jason wakes up an hour later in the same warehouse, surprisingly unscathed. However, he is now haunted by an AI system called The Playbook, a self-improvement programme designed to turn losers just like them into so-called "legends" through ridiculous missions and questionable training. As the boys discover they've each been reborn with their own version of the system, their lives spiral into a whole new level of absurdity, challenges and growth. However, there is a golden rule: Never fall in love. But will this group of lovesick idiots truly be able to navigate their new lives while avoiding the one thing they truly want?
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Chapter 1 - What the fuck just happened?

"Ahhhhhhh! WHAT A STUPID WAY TO DIE!!!" Jason exclaimed, struggling to free himself from the grip of the cold, blood-filled cement.

"Huh?" he wondered, questioning whether he had already died. His eyes scanned the surroundings. It was the same shadowy warehouse where they had followed her. The lights flickered on and off erratically. There was no ventilation. The red flags they had previously ignored.

He looked down at his blood-soaked hands. He shook them to test and then slowly touched his forehead, remembering that he had been shot there. Surprisingly, it was clean.

Still bewildered, he turned to his closest friends, with whom he had ventured on this desperate booty chase. They had followed the deadly smile of a beautiful girl to their untimely end. The sight horrified him. His body froze. His face shifted. Tears slipped from his strained, blue eyes, just like the blood that stained his cold body.

The horrifying scene he never thought he would witness: his two best and only friends in a pool of their own blood.

As if that wasn't enough to push him over the edge, a sleek, neon-blue interface materialised before him, floating in mid-air. Lines of gold text scrolled upward in perfect harmony.

A calm, seductive voice purred directly into his mind, slow and sexy.

"Welcome aboard, Player No. 1337. The Playbook System is now online."

"WHAT THE FUCK???"

 ~2 hours earlier~

Heyo Greg, doesn't this seem sketchy to you?" Jason whispered to Greg.

They had just turned from the busy streets of Tokyo into a dark alley. The little light bulbs hanging on the walls were more for decoration than lighting. They could barely see where they were going.

"What could possibly be shady about this? There's a hot girl right in front of you, bro," Sam intervened from behind with a stern expression. He was determined to lose his virginity that night.

"Hey guys... keep up," the girl ahead winked at them with a beautiful smile that clearly blinded them to everything else before skipping along.

"What more green flags could you possibly need? She's right there, saying yes to all three of us," Greg turned to Jason, more serious than he had ever been, "Now, do you want to die a virgin?"

"No-"

"That's what I thought," Greg smacked Jason on the head, "Now get the fuck on."

After several minutes of walking and hesitation, they finally reached the fun night the girl had promised. A pungent wave of cheap beer, smoke, and sweat poured out as she pulled open the heavy door.

Tables were arranged under dim, flickering lights, surrounded by guys who seemed like they'd been born angry. The girl waved sweetly at a tattooed man running the place and led them right to the centre.

Greg's eyes sparkled at the sight of poker chips. "Bro… this is heaven."

Jason squinted. "Or hell. You never know. Fifty-fifty."

Sam was already halfway to the table, eager to show off his skills to the girl, hoping it would earn him some points. "Relax, we'll just play a few rounds, have some fun, and impress Ana," he said with a smile. She ignored the weirdness and forced a wink in return. 

They sat to play. And as luck would have it, they began to win. First one round, then another, and another.

But by the time Greg raked in his third pile of chips, the room had grown silent. Eyes from all corners of the room were on them.

Jason leaned closer to Greg's ear. "Uh… dude. Why are they all staring at us?"

A fellow man of their chubby stature stood up, walking towards them from a dark corner. But he was nothing like them. His face was scarred, his body covered with tattoos and dark spots. His pot belly bounced steadily as he moved. His white shirt and jeans struggled to stay up, barely holding under the pressure. Yet, something about his overly obese frame shook them to their core.

His muscular arms struck their table with absolute force. "Nobody wins that much in my house."

Jason forced a laugh. "Hey, luck's just a skill, right?"

But sadly for them, the man didn't laugh back. The girl quietly stepped back towards the exit.

Sam whispered, "Bro… she's leaving."

Greg grinned. "Maybe she's getting us a drink."

The lights flickered again. Someone locked the door. People around the room slowly closed in on them, their eyes clearly filled with malicious intent.

Greg's laughter echoed through the room.

"Man, y'all gotta chill," he said, sweeping another handful of chips towards himself. "We're just lucky."

The man still didn't move. His crimson eyes caught a glimmer of the dim light as he said flatly, "Luck doesn't exist here."

Jason's stomach sank. "Okay, that's… kinda terrifying."

From behind, a voice muttered something in Japanese, then the unmistakable click of a gun.

Greg's smile faltered. Sam turned pale.

"Yo… tell me that's not what I think it is," Jason whispered.

The dealer moved around the table towards them slowly. "You win, you pay respect."

"What's that mean?" Jason asked, his brain still trying to catch up.

The voice from the group shouted from behind, "Means you don't leave, dumbass!"

Ana had already left through the door, head bowed. She didn't look back.

Jason opened his mouth to say something stupid, but the sound of the first gunshot silenced him. The table exploded into splinters. Greg fell first. His bald head bounced off the concrete a couple of times before settling. Sam reached for him, and another shot was fired. He fell too.

Jason stumbled backwards, clutching his chest. Warm blood coated his fingers. His mind was screaming. 

This can't be real. It's just a nightmare. It can't be true, right?

He hit the ground hard. His breath came short. His ears went blank. The last thing he saw before his eyes closed was the man's obese stomach.

"What... a... stu-" 

 ***

"Ah!! This chick is crazy!!! She wants to kill me again!!" Out of fright, Jason barked, getting to his feet and running around the room.

His face was genuinely terrified. He'd recognised the voice. It was Ana's. 

After running for his life for what felt like forever, he was not the most athletic teenager. He stopped to catch his breath.

"Ahh!!" he screamed, noticing the system just beside him.

"Holy shit!" It all suddenly came to him. "It's like in that game we played yesterday."

"I've been reborn with a system!!" he shouted, his voice echoing across the entire warehouse.

He wondered if the same thing had happened to his friends. He quickly stood up and ran to them.

"Greg! Sam! Wake the fuck up, Greg! We've been fuckin reborn with a system," his voice boomed, filled with joy. "This is fuckin awesome."