Liang Feng died like an idiot.
There was no glory, no destiny, no mysterious heavenly lightning.
He simply tripped inside a forbidden imperial tomb while trying to measure carvings like some history nerd, slipped like a bowling ball on polished stone, and slammed head-first into a solemn-looking stone turtle.
The turtle's face was the last thing he saw.
A face that somehow looked… disappointed.
Darkness swallowed him.
And then—
Silk.
Warmth.
Golden lanterns glowing like mini suns.
Jade pillars carved with dragons.
A bed so soft it could erase every bad decision he ever made.
Liang Feng blinked.
He looked left. Palace.
He looked right. Palace.
He looked at the mirror in front of him… a handsome man looked back.
Not "normal handsome."
Not "pretty boy."
But absurd, unfair, cold-elegant imperial handsome.
"What the f—"
The door slammed open.
Maid
"Your Majesty! You collapsed right after the coronation! Are you hurt?"
Liang Feng
"…Your Majesty? Coronation? Me?? Emperor???"
The maid looked like she was about to faint again, but before she could explain anything—
The entire room trembled.
The lantern flames bent sideways.
Shadows froze.
An invisible force pressed down like a divine hand.
And then, from thin air, a radiant figure stepped out.
Tall. Glowing. Ancient.
And looked bored out of his mind.
The Divine Emperor.
Liang Feng's soul nearly ran away.
Liang Feng
"AM I THE CHOSEN ONE? THE PROPHES—"
Divine Emperor
"No."
The shutdown was instant and brutal.
Divine Emperor
"Your death was funny. That's the only reason you're here. I was bored."
Liang Feng
"…Sir???"
The Divine Emperor waved a sleeve.
Three glowing boards appeared in the air like floating stats in a cultivation RPG.
IMPERIAL COURT — INFLUENCE STATUS
You, the Emperor ...... 5% (Dogshit Tier)
Second Prince ....... 25%
Empress Dowager ........ 20%
Noble Clans ...... 30%
Neutral Officials ...... 20%
Liang Feng stared at the numbers.
Liang Feng
"FIVE?! Why am I FIVE?!"
Divine Emperor (rubbing temples)
"Because you just got crowned, you have no experience, and the court thinks you will die before winter."
Liang Feng
"I—I WHAT?!"
The Divine Emperor pointed to the Second Prince's glowing name.
Divine Emperor
"Your brother has been preparing for the throne for decades.
And remember—royal bloodlines here don't show age.
Even at a hundred, they still look young."
Liang Feng
"So he LOOKS young but he's actually old, experienced, and already plotting to kill me?"
Divine Emperor
"Correct."
Liang Feng felt half-dead already.
Liang Feng
"What about the clans?"
Divine Emperor
"They don't care who sits on the throne.
They only care who gives them more power."
Liang Feng
"And the neutral officials?"
Divine Emperor
"They are waiting to see who wins.
They have bet NOT on you."
Liang Feng
"…Thanks."
Liang Feng collapsed onto the bed with his new handsome face buried in silk.
Liang Feng
"SO WHAT DO YOU EXPECT ME TO DO?!
SAVE THE EMPIRE?! FIX EVERYTHING?!
BECOME A GREAT EMPEROR?!"
Divine Emperor
"No.
Just don't die.
Also, entertain me."
Liang Feng lifted his head like a zombie rising from a grave.
Liang Feng
"THAT'S IT?! THAT'S ALL?!"
The Divine Emperor began fading like mist.
Divine Emperor
"Survive, child.
Succeed, fail, suffer, or die again…
All possibilities amuse me."
Liang Feng
"WAIT! GIVE ME ONE USEFUL ADVICE!"
The divine figure paused.
Liang Feng prayed for wisdom.
Instead, he got personal betrayal.
Divine Emperor
"Don't trust anyone.
Especially those who smile at you."
And with that, he vanished—like a ghost leaving after dropping the worst spoiler of the century.
Silence returned.
Liang Feng sat alone in the grand palace room, staring at the glowing influence boards floating in front of him.
5%.
He had 5%.
His brother wanted the throne.
The clans wanted a puppet.
The neutral officials wanted a winner.
And the Divine Emperor…
…wanted entertainment.
Liang Feng covered his face with both hands.
He whispered the truth of his existence:
"…I'm absolutely screwed."