So I guess I'll start this off by saying that the attraction has always been there, although initially it was slight. When we first met I was able to handle being around you because the attraction wasn't high, but things changed through the years. At first I guess I'd blame the slight attraction on the simple fact that you had a shorter hair style, and I prefer long hair, and now that you have long hair… The first time I saw you with long hair, I felt that my feelings for you had changed, because I noticed I couldn't keep my eyes off you (even though the hair wasn't done). I couldn't help but watch your every move, and I was just hoping that something would've happened where you would've given me some sort of glance back. The second time I saw you with long hair, my first thought upon seeing you in the window (before you texted me) was, "who is that looking all good up there?" It wasn't until you texted me that I realized what I said had been about you, but after seeing you I just accepted the statement seeing as how I was generally attracted to you in the moment. Something about you with the braids just did something different to me, and again I just couldn't keep my focus off you. At that point it wasn't just the face I was looking at, I also started looking at the body seeing how much it appealed to me, just trying to see how far I'd be willing to go (if things ever made it that far). My interest for you is really just growing by the day, even though there's nothing happening to make it that way. It's not like you've necessarily shown me any interest that would give me any reason to believe that you'd be interested, but for some reason I just can't get you off my mind. Every time I'm around you I just want to hold you, or for you to hold me, but at the same time I've been jealous of the relationship you shared with Christian. I try not to show it while I'm around, but I notice the subtle ways in which you both touch each other, and really I just wish it were me being touched by you instead of him. Honestly I don't even know exactly what your sexuality is, and frankly I'm afraid to ask because I'm afraid the answer may not be one in my favor (even though there's no guarantee you'd want anything with me anyway). I'm just hoping to keep our little weekly sessions going, and maybe one day you could possibly make a move on me, seeing as how I'm too shy to make one on you… I'm not saying that we would have to be in a relationship, we could just be friends with benefits, or even if we just messed around once that'd be fine too. I'm just trying to say that I'm open to the idea of us having sex, but obviously it'd have to be something you wanted because I'm not trying to push the subject.
