"Haa… breathe in. Breathe out. It's gonna be okay, Shen,." I kept telling myself.
I stayed there a while, trying to calm down.
Slowly, I helped myself up from the ground.
I opened the barn door and walked back to the house in silence.
I'm overreacting, I thought.
It's not like I got a death sentence… yet.
I was just being sent to the palace.
And hey, I thought, when I get there, maybe the characters there will be able to remember the novel.
Yeah… it'll be fine.
I walked a bit longer in silence, finally reaching home.
The door creaked as I slowly pushed it open. I peeked inside, and my heart settled when I saw the empty, scattered chairs around.
I was glad everyone had left, I thought, and slowly made my way to my room.
I collapsed onto my bed, staring at the ceiling, my mind swirling with thoughts of tomorrow.
Then I heard a soft knock on the door.
"Come in," I said.
"Shen," I heard. As my mother slowly opened the door.
She came in, followed by my father, Meilin, and Xue Li.
I slowly sat up as they entered. They smiled softly and sat down on the bed beside me.
"Shen, my love," my mother said, placing her hand warmly on my cheek. "Are you alright, my dear? You seemed so upset about the declaration… and you ran off. Your father and Xue Li went looking for you, but they didn't know where you'd gone."
"What's wrong, my dear?" my father asked, putting a hand on my shoulder.
I smiled faintly, tears stinging my eyes. Their warmth and care moved me more than I could say.
So much so I decided to open , I couldn't tell them the truth but I could at least tell them what i was feeling.
"I… I don't want to go to the royal declaration," I said softly.
"Why not?" my mother asked.
"It's a great opportunity," my father said gently. "Why do you reject it so much?"
I just looked at him sadly. "I'm scared," I said.
They all turned to each other, worry written across their faces, unsure of what to do.
My mom asked gently, "Why Shen, what's wrong?"
"I'm scared that I'll make a mistake," I said.
"A mistake?" my dad whispered.
"Yes," I replied. "I'm scared that if I go to the palace, I'll say or do something that could cost me my life… or my family's."
"Shen… I don't understand," my mom said.
"You know how I am," I said, using Shen's character to convince them. "I always make mistakes. I always mess things up. I ruin things. That's just me. I never do anything right."
"No, Shen," my mom said, cutting me off. "You don't make mistakes. You don't ruin things. You've never messed up."
"Shen, I know you're stubborn and sometimes mischievous, but you've never done anything to hurt anyone," she continued. "You're a good person. You'd never do anything to hurt us. The trouble you cause, the games you play… you do it to bring joy, happiness, and liveliness to the clan."
"Yes!" Xue Li added, smiling. "After all our pranks, we get scolded a lot, but later, when the elders and villagers gather, they laugh about it. They make jokes. And every day, everyone looks forward to seeing you pull something crazy again. You do a lot of good, Shen."
I smiled faintly at that.
"But still," I said, looking at them, "I don't want to leave home and go to the capital. What's the point? It's not like I'll succeed or anything. What if they aren't happy with me, and I actually mess something up?"
"Nonsense!" my father said, holding my hands. "My Shen… not succeed at something?"
"Of course you will, Shen. You're smart, talented, and you've helped so much in the village. Of course you'll succeed. And of course they'll be happy with you."
"Yes," my mom added. "You will succeed. And about home… we'll write you letters every day, so you won't miss it. You can visit anytime you want, and you'll always be welcome. Your home isn't going anywhere."
"Yes, Shen. So stop acting like it's the end of the world," Meilin said, glaring at me.
"Mom's right. It's not like we'll disappear, and you can always come back and show your silly face anytime you want."
I just laughed as she said that.
My family smiled too, and the mood shifted.
"And who knows who knows what position they'll give you?" My father teased. "Even if it's just a servant… maybe later, you can become a royal advisor if you work hard."
"Yes! Or a head advisor," my mom added smiling.
"Or a Grand Chancellor!" Xue Li chimed in.
"Yes! All hail Grand Chancellor Shen!" Xue Li announced loudly as she jumped.
"Yes! All hail Grand Chancellor Shen!" my family joined in, and we all laughed.
We kept joking about me in the palace, laughing all night.
Later on after allthe fun and jokes.
They all started to leave .
"Goodnight, Shen," my mom and dad said as they headed to their room.
"Bye, crybaby," Meilin called.
"Bye, Shen," Xue Li said with a smile. "I'll head home now."
I watched them leave, smiling, before finally laying down on my bed, my heart leaping.
Shen was really lucky, I thought.
No… I'm really lucky. They're my family now. I thought happily.
Then I threw back the covers.
Their words, their care—it really lifted my heart.
I can do this.
There's nothing to be afraid of.
I won't make the mistakes the old Shen did. I'll protect myself… and my family.
Let tomorrow come, I thought.
I'm ready for whatever it throws at me.