Is life really worth living?Everywhere you go,people all repeat the same words.
"Just persevere a little longer and you'll find your meaning"
"Life isn't worth stressing over.You should just live in the 'now'."
"Just believe in the 'Holy words' of the one above. He'll make your life easier."
These words keep repeating themselves like a symphony.And now as I stand here,struggling to stay awake,I wonder to myself what was the point of it all.
"Everyone is just repeating the same thing they hear from everyone else.People these days rarely even think for themselves.They are all just mindless idiots."
"I wonder...if I was like them,would it have made it easier to continue living carefree.Even if I try to shout I out to them,we're all still of the same level of 'existence' so they obviously won't listen to me.In the end,we are all just hopeless children.We all struggle to fill our existence with any reason that makes sense to us.We do it so much that we forget why even started doing it in the first place."
Can you blame them?You are probably doing the same thing right now.Even I could have ended up the same.Call it a blessing or a curse but after that one fateful day,my life forever changed in a way I couldn't have imagined.
...
The time was noon.The clouds were slowly gathering over the many city lights and building. Just from the dark eerie breeze,it was clear that a bad omen had fallen on the world.In the dark and cold world was where I,'Saroto' had died.
I was running away from a group of 'bad' people who were rampant in chasing after me.This was mostly due to my so called 'troublesome' nature of stealing.In the process,I found myself even stealing from people who I never thought I would.Maybe this was some sort of punishment for my deeds but what could I do?I was but a small insignificant orphan at the time.I had no home to turn to or source of livelihood to feed myself and stay alive so the only option I could see was simply taking away from those who had plenty.I mean it wasn't like it would hurt them if a little food was stolen from time to time,right?
"Sometimes I even wonder why I'm struggling so much just to stay alive for a few meager hours.In the end,my struggles will just be forgotten like they never existed in the first place."
They chased and hunted me down with spears in their hands.Before I knew it,I had already been caught.In the dark alley way,I found myself already injured and fatigued from the long chase.My heart was beating senseless as I knew it would be my end soon.
"There is really no way out,"I thought to myself.
All roads and paths were blocked From the path I came from to the brightful streets,there was no way I could escape.After all,I was already branded as a 'criminal'.No one would stick their necks out for someone like that.
Even so,what else could I do.I looked at them,my gaze calm as the sea,in my final moments as they held me firmly by the neck.The looks on their faces was a mixture of deep hatred and disgust pointed directly at me.They were disgusted at me and my very existence.
"Why couldn't he just stay in line instead of causing so many problems,"they said to themselves.
I couldn't understand them at the time.What did I do wrong for trying to live?
They coldly told to die.
"Because of you,we lost pur job,family and source of livelihood for ourselves,"
I didn't want to listen to them. I didn't want to listen to their suffering and hardships.Why should I?Would they bother to listen to mine.
The more they shouted,the more my heart ached.
"How did it come to this?"
I couldn't help but think of how I could have made a whole different family from my own homeless.Just the thought of it made me lose my last strength of fighting back and accept my punishment.
And so I was finally drenched in blood,my long dark hair stained in red.The rain started washing off my disguise showing half of my hair as a bright golden colour.Looking at the massive amounts of blood gushing out from my body,I couldn't help but laugh.I was simply a child who hadn't even reached 15 years of age,yet all the dreams and ambitions I swore to accomplish had been cut down before I could even venture out into the world.I wanted to cry at myself but I couldn't even remove a single drop.I was cursing myself over and over.
"Why...just why am I not able to do anything in this world?The world is so big and I'm just so small.I can't make any single meaningful change in this world.I want to do at least one meaningful thing with my life but I can't.Im just so...insignificant.What could I even hope to achieve?!"
As if weeping for me,a heavy rain befell the land accompanied by furious thunderstorms.Looking up to the dark sky,I felt a deep sense of regret in my heart.Who wouldn't?I vowed to myself.
"If a chance is given to me again,I'll live a life without any regrets in it.With that I found myself drawing my seemingly last breath as I departed from the world.The world was turning dark all around me.
"It's all right.At least no one will remember a person like me after this. I'll just be forgotten."
However,that wouldn't be the end of it,now would it