PAIN.
That was the only thing Kai felt. Just pure, unadulterated, bone-rattling pain.
"Eat dirt, you F-Rank loser!"
Thud!
A heavy boot slammed into Kai's ribs. He coughed, tasting copper. He was curled up like a shrimp behind the college gym, surrounded by five guys who looked like they injected steroids directly into their eyeballs.
Leading them was Lei. The self-proclaimed "Campus King." He was rich, handsome, and had A-Rank Potential with the [Flame Fist] ability. Currently, he was just an E-Rank brat, but compared to Kai, he was a god.
Kai had nothing. He was a 'Blank'—a zero ability freak living in his dad's basement, eating instant noodles and scrolling through spicy forums until 3 AM.
"Look at him," Lei laughed, spitting a wad of phlegm near Kai's face. "He's not even groaning anymore. Boring. Hey, trash, my mom's poodle has more spiritual energy than your whole bloodline. You should just kill yourself and save the air for the rest of us."
The goons laughed like hyenas. "Hahaha! Good one, Boss Lei! He's pathetic!"
Kai's vision was blurry. His body was broken, but his brain? His brain was frying with rage.
'They think this is funny? They think they own the world just because they can throw tiny fireballs?'
He looked up. Through his swollen, purple eye, he saw Lei's smug, punchable face.
And then, Kai grinned. It was a bloody, broken, psychotic grin.
"Hey... Lei..." Kai wheezed, blood bubbling past his lips.
Lei paused, raising an eyebrow. "Oh? The trash speaks? Begging for mercy? Lick my shoe and maybe I'll stop."
Kai took a deep, jagged breath, ignoring the stabbing pain in his lungs.
"... your mom has been looking real lonely lately."
The alley went silent. Dead silent. Even the wind stopped blowing to listen to the disrespect. The birds stopped chirping.
Lei's face twitched. "What did you say?"
Kai spat a glob of blood onto Lei's expensive limited-edition sneakers. "I said, I'm gonna find that hot milf of a mother you have, show her what a real dick feels like, and become your new Daddy. So show some respect to your father, boy!"
For a second, nobody moved. The goons exchanged horrified glances.
Then, Lei's face turned purple.
"YOU ARE COURTING DEATH!!!"
"KILL HIM! BEAT HIM UNTIL HE CAN'T GET IT UP EVER AGAIN!"
BOOM!
It wasn't a beating this time. It was a massacre. Lei's fist caught fire. He slammed it right into Kai's face.
Bam! Bam! Pow!
Kai's consciousness faded instantly. The last thing he heard was Lei screaming insults about his ancestry. Then, everything went black.
.
..
…
[ VOID SPACE ]
Darkness. Infinite, suffocating darkness.
It felt cold, like the underside of a pillow, but wet. Kai floated in the nothingness, his consciousness drifting like a plastic bag in the wind.
'So this is it?' Kai thought, his mental voice echoing in the void. 'I died? Beaten to death by a bunch of rich sociopaths behind a gym? What a pathetic end to a pathetic life.'
He tried to remember his achievements. High school grades? C-average. Girlfriends? None. Unless you counted his hard drive. Money? He had $14 in his bank account.
'At least I don't have to pay rent anymore,' he mused bitterly. 'I hope Lei's mom gets a yeast infection.'
Suddenly—
DING!
A blue light exploded in the darkness. It was blinding, searing through the void like a flashbang. A mechanical voice, sounding like a mix between a GPS navigation system and a sultry ASMR streamer, echoed directly inside his skull.
[ DETECTING HOST SOUL... ]
[ ANALYZING KARMA... ]
[ HOST ANGER LEVELS: CRITICAL. ]
[ HOST HORNY LEVELS: MAXIMUM GOONER STATUS DETECTED. ]
[ VIRGINITY SHIELD: INTACT (AND VERY THICK). ]
Kai's soul twitched. "Hey! You don't have to announce it like that!"
[ SYSTEM COMPATIBILITY: 100% ]
[ CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE AWAKENED THE
The words floated in the air, glowing with gold neon light. Kai stared at them. He had read enough trashy webnovels to know exactly what this was.
"A System?" Kai gasped. "I'm the MC? I'm finally the main character?!"
[ AFFIRMATIVE. WELCOME TO YOUR NEW LIFE, PLAYER KAI. ]
[ SCANNING PREVIOUS TALENT... F-RANK GARBAGE DETECTED. DELETE? (Y/N) ]
"Delete! Delete that shit immediately!" Kai screamed mentally.
[ DELETING TRASH TALENT... ][ REWRITING DNA... ][ REWRITING DESTINY... ][ INJECTING 'PROTAGONIST HALO'... ]
[ DING! NEW POTENTIAL UNLOCKED: SSS-RANK! ]
[ SPECIAL ABILITY GRANTED:
Kai's imaginary jaw dropped. "Cultivate by... breeding? You mean I just have to have sex to become a god?"
[ CORRECT. WHY FIGHT WHEN YOU CAN FUCK? ]
"This is the greatest System ever created," Kai wept tears of joy. "I love you, System."
[ STARTER PACK DETECTED. WOULD YOU LIKE TO OPEN IT? ]
"Open it! Open it now!"
[ OPENING STARTER PACK... ]
[ YOU RECEIVED: 1x HEAVENLY BODY RECONSTRUCTION PILL. ][ EFFECT: HEALS ALL INJURIES. PURIFIES SKIN. INCREASES MUSCLE DENSITY. ENLARGES 'WEAPON' SIZE BY 300%. ]
[ YOU RECEIVED: 1x SSS-RANK SUMMONING CARD (RANDOM). ]
[ QUEST ISSUED: REVENGE. ][ OBJECTIVE: HUMILIATE THE BULLY 'LEI' AND FULFILL YOUR DYING OATH TO CONQUER HIS MOTHER. ][ TIME LIMIT: 24 HOURS. ][ FAILURE PENALTY: PERMANENT IMPOTENCE. ]
"Wait, impotence?!" Kai panicked. "Okay, okay, I get it. Revenge is priority number one. Send me back!"
[ INITIATING RESURRECTION... ]
...
[ REAL WORLD ]
GASP!
Kai's eyes snapped open. He sucked in a breath of air that tasted like dumpster juice and copper.
He was still in the alley. The sun was setting, casting long, bloody shadows across the concrete. He was lying in a pool of his own blood, but... something was different.
The pain was gone.
No, not just gone. He felt incredible.
[HEAVENLY BODY RECONSTRUCTION PILL Consumed!]
A burning heat was spreading from his dantian (his lower belly), coursing through his veins like liquid fire. SNAP! CRACK! POP!
His broken ribs snapped back into place. His shattered nose reformed, straighter and sharper than before. His skin, previously pale and dotted with acne, shed away like dust, revealing smooth, jade-like flesh underneath.
And his pants?
They were suddenly very, very tight.
"Holy shit," Kai whispered, his voice deeper, vibrating in his own chest. He looked down. The bulge in his jeans was frankly concerning. "The System wasn't kidding about the 300% buff."
He stood up. He felt light, powerful. He flexed his hand, and the air popped. He wasn't the skinny, malnourished nerd anymore. He was ripped. He had an eight-pack. He was a Greek God wrapped in blood-stained rags.
"Man, you messed him up bad, Lei," a voice drifted from the alley entrance.
Kai looked up. The bullies hadn't left yet. They were walking away, laughing, about twenty meters out.
"He deserved it," Lei scoffed, wiping Kai's blood off his knuckles with a handkerchief. "Let him rot. Maybe the rats will eat him. It'll be an improvement to the gene pool."
Kai narrowed his eyes. A cold, predatory smile spread across his face.
"Hey, dutiful son," Kai shouted.
.
.
.
Venerable Gooners, this is the stop where you leave your brains behind. We won't be needing them for the rest of the journey. Please sit back and enjoy the ride.