When you endure pain for a long time, you don't feel it anymore.... you just become habitual of it..
"Steve you don't have to go this far!!", my mom shouted.
"I'll and why not? You and your daughter have both made my life miserable.", my father shouted in anger.
All this was a regular in our home. My mom and dad were in a loveless marriage. They used to fight everyday. Since the time I remember I only heard screaming and shouting in our home. Well its useless to call that place a home because it was nothing like that.
I had just returned from school and heard my parents fighting. I was in 5th grade. I thought it was all just regular fights that kept happening everyday until....
SMASH!!!
"Ouch! That hurt Steve!", I heard my mom crying.
I went up immediately and was shocked to see blood flowing down my mother's head. I was just a ten year old girl and to see something like this was like terrifying and disturbing at the same time.
"Run Ash run!! Now.. Don't wait for me.. Mom's gonna be okay.", my mom shouted.
My father was drowned in alcohol. He lost all his senses to what he was doing. What was right and what was wrong, he forgot it all.
Coz he hated me. I always heard him saying this to my mother, "This girl is not my child. You got knocked up by someone else and now have put her responsibility on me." For a little girl this was all so depressing to hear. My mom always feared he would do something to me. And today was that day.
I ran with all my ability. My father came running behind me to catch me, to hurt me like he did to my mom. I was terrified. I was crying. I was helpless.
I could hear him saying me bad words and shouting like crazy. I kept running for my life and that's when I entered a house. Luckily the gates were open and a woman was cooking in the kitchen when she heard me crying and screaming. It was Lilly's home.
My father lost me and in the meantime my mom called police. He was arrested for domestic violence, physical assault and mental torture.
My mom was taken to hospital where she was admitted for two days. She had lost quite blood and was weak.
I remember crying for two days straight. Luckily Lilly's mom was there for me. That day she not only saved me but also gave me a home to stay without any fear. The Collins were a decent family. They kept me and mom in their home until we found a new place to live. We could not go back to our old home because it was under my father's name. Also we had such bad memories of that place that we could no longer live there.
"You both are safe here. Bad days are gone and cheer up because a better life is waiting for you!", Lilly's mom said.
Lilly was of my age and at first she was reluctant in accepting me but few days passed and we became like sisters. We played all day and went to school together. I was slowly recovering and starting to feel normal.
We finally found a place to live. It was sad to leave Collins' home because for the first time in my life I experienced what a happy family looks like. A caring father, a loving mom and healthy conversations at dinner table. This is how an ideal family looks like. Still we had to move out. And we will forever be grateful to Collins for their support.
Initially my mom suffered financially. Luckily she saved up some money all these years escaping from my father and now that money was helping us start a new life. We took a single room & kitchen apartment that time. My mom started baking and selling cakes and muffins from home. We struggled for a year until one day my mom got an order to prepare eateries for a wedding and we got a huge amount from it. It was the best day of both of our lives since I don't know when. We cried that day. But this time those were happy tears.
I have huge respect for my mother because she never gave up. She is strong, confident and always believed in herself. I will forever be grateful to my mother for loving me and giving me everything that I needed.
8 Years have passed since that incident and I wouldn't lie that I'm not completely over that memory. I still have nightmares sometimes and I see myself running in my dream all sweaty, fearful and crying. I know it is a past but I fear I might someday come across my father and then what happens. This thought still terrifies me.