Bruce wasn't even sure how to breathe properly after the cave fiasco. One moment he was choking on buttery popcorn in a theater, the next he had a sassy, teasing system named Sandra in his head and just rescued Tony Stark from terrorists like some kind of reckless, charming messiah.
He wiped dust off his jacket, looked around at the cave's exit, and muttered to himself, "Okay… multiverse chaos. Check. OP powers. Check. First rescue. Check. Now… harem?"
Sandra's voice purred in his head. "Exactly. And your first target is… well, a lady who's going to test your flirting skills. Seriously. Don't fuck this up."
Bruce grinned. "Ohhh, I didn't know we were doing multiverse pick-up lines now. I'm so ready."
The system guided him through a ripple in the multiverse—one moment he was standing on the cave floor, the next he appeared in a shadowy corridor of a Stark facility, where Natasha Romanoff was investigating a lead on Hydra activity. Her hair was tied back, expression sharp, ready to kick ass.
Bruce tried to appear casual. He failed spectacularly. Natasha's eyes narrowed. "Who the hell are you?" she asked, voice sharp, but there was a flicker of amusement.
"Bruce," he said smoothly, flashing a grin. "Just your average multiverse-traveling, popcorn-choking, OP anti-hero. And you?"
Natasha crossed her arms. "Romanoff. And I don't have time for games."
Bruce leaned against a wall, flipping a stray strand of hair with mock elegance. "Oh, games are my specialty. But trust me, you're fun to play with. I like a girl who… challenges me."
Natasha's eyebrow twitched. "You talk a lot."
"I flirt, darling. It's a gift," Bruce replied, his grin widening. "And if you play hard to get… well, Sandra says it's my favorite type of challenge."
Sandra giggled in his mind. "Ohhhh, he's good. Keep teasing her. Harder. Make it fun."
Bruce smirked, taking a slow step closer. "I'll make it fun, Nat. I promise. Or you can try shooting me and see how that goes."
Natasha smirked herself, just a flicker. "Bold. I like bold. But reckless? That's your problem, popcorn boy."
"Reckless is my middle name," Bruce quipped. "Right after Chaotic. And maybe Sexy, but we'll see if you get to decide that later."
She rolled her eyes, but the faintest blush betrayed her irritation—no, not irritation, interest. Bruce noted it immediately. Sandra was practically bouncing in his mind: Ohhh, he's got her flustered. Smooth.
---
The next universe jump was just as absurd. Bruce and Natasha tumbled through a glowing multiverse portal, landing smack in the middle of Wanda's scarlet reality-bending chaos zone.
Wanda turned, eyes blazing red with suspicion and power. "Who… are you?"
Bruce bowed theatrically. "Bruce. I rescue Tony, flirt with spies, and occasionally break timelines. And you, Scarlet Witch… are definitely a lot of fun to flirt with."
Wanda blinked, her reality-warping powers jittering slightly as she regarded him. "You… flirt with everyone?"
"Only the ones who play hard to get," he replied smoothly. "Trust me, Sandra told me you'd be the ultimate challenge."
Sandra's voice purred: "He's dangerously good. Don't let the blush slip, Wanda. Make him earn it."
Wanda's lips twitched in a smirk, but she stood her ground, ready to attack—but only just. Bruce dodged a small energy bolt with flair, laughing. "See? I dodge for fun. You're welcome."
And so it began. Bruce's multiverse harem adventures: flirty banter, playful challenges, and just enough danger to make hearts race—his and theirs. Every universe jump was a new opportunity to tease, flirt, and recruit allies, whether they wanted to admit it or not.
By the time Bruce sat down with Wanda for a moment to catch his breath, he whispered, smirking, "So… you gonna admit I'm charming yet? Or do I have to keep showing off?"
Wanda rolled her eyes again, but Bruce saw the corners of her mouth twitching. Progress. Sandra purred triumphantly. Ohhh, we're just getting started.