12pm October 12th 2007
Leaving the Admin Office with a stack of papers in hand that wasn't some sort of disciplinary form fells incredibly odd & almost as impossible as everything I had to hear & absorb this morning. 'If it wasn't for the fact a Nihilistic Optimist who studied all of this stuff intensively because it was better then dealing with the real world I would've checked myself into a grippy sock vacation.' Now that I have the forms confirming my leave of absence with it not affecting my attendance after Mid-Terms. Meaning I can now focus on spending time with gramps before he kicks the bucket & try to wrap my head around all of this since gramps purposefully looked into getting me a job at the pub from the start figuring that working in a place full of Were-beasts would be safe as well as keep me out of trouble. Go figure that's why I managed to last 3 years there without ever getting into a single altercation with anyone pushing my buttons for fun cause between it being glaringly obvious how I handle confrontation if you look at my hands or nose there was also Debbie who is in fact momma bear of the place all but claiming me as a adoptive child unbeknownst to me.
Feeling a shiver run down my spine at that thought because unlike a lot of people I don't know what family is in any traditional sense. Sure Jason is my grandfather with more claim to that then anyone else who could walk into my life may try to with Mary being & I'm quoting Jason here {The Bat shit crazy Aunt with to many cats} which I value the ability to walk to much to ever dare say that to her or around her. Over the past almost decade I've learned lessons & tried to be a "proper man" as much as possible while walking the towards a better future but now?? I feel like a kite in the wind with it's string cut or a raft caught in a storm because I'm unsure if I should even stay trying to finish college if shit is going to start getting weird around me. But for now I need to hit Family Dollar buy groceries & then go home & cook a actual meal that isn't a combination of whatever I have on hand.
*You know you're handling this much better then I thought you would. Especially since you didn't even try asking me to extend Jason's time with you in any way since he's the reason you're even suffering through college.* Of course Anubis would show back up at this time *Why would I even attempt that? There's to many tragedies of what happens to those who try to cheat death & ward it away. I'd rather not make those kinds of enemies or mistakes besides Gramps would put a .45 in my knee for even attempting it.*
'Speaking of which what the hell am I even supposed to do with the apartment?? I doubt Amir & his brother will let me keep that apartment above Sammy's since they only let Jason stay there because of a deal their grandfather had made with him back in the 80's. Wonder if they'll let me stay there at least till after I graduate college.' Completely ignoring the fact the chances of me being able to stay may be non-existent with what could start happening around me regardless of my choice in the matter. Looking up at the sky I can tell it's going to rain at some point so I need to start moving my happy ass around if I don't want to be walking thru puddles to get home.
6 hours later
The smell of garlic & onion is all I can smell as I have a pan of caramelized onions simmering & 2 flank steaks going on another burner with butter, garlic, cilantro, sage against some people's choice & a small dash of dill with TOOL's AEnima album playing on a beat up CD Walkman on my hip, headset hanging onto my head keeping me on my own tempo. "Hey gramps I'm finishing up the steaks now, last chance you want mushrooms with your steak or just the caramelized onions??" Leaning out the kitchen door to look at him & read his lips which is him clearly telling me where I can shove mushrooms. "Well alright then another 5 minutes & I'll bring you your plate." not hearing his response over {Forty Six & 2} hitting the big guitar solo section leaving me throwing my head in small bobs prepping to throw green beans in the pan the steaks where just in to make full use of every ingredient. 'Man I forgot how nice it is to just sit listening to music while I cook.'
Turning to cut up gramps steak for him & then reached for the A1 sauce he had to have every time making me want to gag at ruining a perfectly good steak but it's a habit once again from his days in the Corp & needing to make things have a taste to them. The green beans begin to sizzle letting me know they're & I transfer them to our plates. Viola a nice home cooked meal now time to sit in front of the TV & watch some Jeopardy hearing gramps gripe about everything being to specific before I have to clean everything up. Putting my Walkman back in my room I walk into the living room to enjoy my meal only to have gramps go "Can you go & get some sherbet after dinner at Family Dollar?? I think I want something sweet after this."
I can feel a tick starting in my jaw & course thru to my temple knowing damn well that he knew he wanted it before I left to go do my errands meaning I could've picked it up when I was there 5 hours ago. "Sure no problem asshole" which got a chuckle out of him leaving me no room other then to suck it up & go get the damn sherbet. "I assume the tri color one not the single flavor ones?" With the only response being a look asking if I'm stupid & I should know the answer already. Well instead of enjoying time to digest after eating I get to clean the kitchen after finishing up, grab my hoodie & am out the door into the rain just as it starts. Of course the rain is in a downpour that won't let up for the next 3 hours at least & a weather advisory in effect. 'The old geezer really knows how to time making me do this shit. I'm going to need a shower to warm up with the way it's coming down.'
After getting back & taking a nice hot shower it's now time to sit with gramps eat some sherbet at least that was the plan instead I saw he was passed out in his chair when I got back. It gave me a scare at first seeing him slumped in his recliner but I knew he was alive soon after cause man snores like a broken mower meaning I got the joy of scooping him up & carrying him to bed while trying not to wake him...'He weighs maybe a 120lbs right now & feels fragile like this... life breaking good people down in the worst of ways & not even giving the common courtesy of a proper warning.' He was only about 5'8 but he was still decently filled out when I first met him & up until this past year he still looked the same but now it's clear to see the hell his body's been through even with the aggressive meds the VA has him on to treat whatever is wrong.
3 hours later
Looking at my alarm clock seeing it say 9:50 in bright red numbers having looked at the clock for the 3rd time since laying down. 'Ugghhh I should just fall asleep but my brains to jittery especially after the scare earlier... Fuck it I'll just go for a walk it's not like I can't protect myself.' & with that thought I grab a pair of sweats & a hoodie only to stop looking over at a pair of fingerless gloves & boxing wraps sitting in the corner of the drawer I snagged the hoodie from. Should be a good idea to put em on even if I'm not looking for a fight or willing to get into one right now because it's better safe then sorry. Though I won't lie to myself... it feels comforting to wear them for some reason. 'Let's just go for a walk to calm my brain down & avoid knocking anyone's heads off their shoulders.'
Somehow Karma's going to kick me in the balls soon.