"Thank you for your cooperation Tensei, I look forward to seeing you again." It was true, he didn't normally team up with spotlight heroes, Tensei at least managed to zip up and be more practical than the average guy. It was a shame what happened to him.
"Not a problem. I'm just glad you're looking out for Tenya. Gotta say, the Hosu incident took me by surprise. Usually Tenya's so straight laced and follows the rules by the book. Guess I shouldn't have given him the Ingenium name so quickly."
"Overkill for sure." That boy went to a dark place. Thankfully Endeavor was there … was a sentence he didn't use often. "He's doing better though, he seems to have been brought back."
"Thank god. All right, i'm heading out, have to check up on my sidekicks. Later." The phone line disconnected, Aizawa sighing as he placed it down.
"Another down, next up … them." He stared at the single number, only written down for emergencies on Suzuki's file. He wanted to get involved, but he knew Nedzu was right. There was nothing he could do at the moment other than wait it out and get someone else more qualified. He dialed the number, repressing all emotions as he waited for the pickup.
It rang…and rang…and rang. Come on, you bastards, pick up, think about your kid for at least ONCE in your miserable lives. "Hello?" The voice of what he assumed to be Suzuki's mother came up.
"This is Mrs. Suzuki, correct? I'm Shota Aizawa, Suzuki's classroom teacher."
"Oh dear, what did our little Iruma-kun do this time? Such a troublemaker." Already starting off by blaming the kid for something. This call was already going to leave a bad taste in his mouth.
"Nothing, I'm simply informing all legal guardians of Parents Day next week." He explained, pulling out his stress ball and juice pouch. The booze was too far away and far too early to use.
"It is? Well that sounds so lovely." Did it now? Did it really? "Unfortunately we don't know if we can make it next week, we have jobs to attend to, our son's appetite doesn't pay for itself you know." He couldn't argue with that, except he knew from Recovery Girl's examinations that the kid had YEARS of malnutrition going on. It was a miracle Suzuki was able to develop any form of muscle.
"So who will be coming in your place then. I'd like to get names and numbers set up ahead of time." Someone, just anyone he could question in front of witnesses.
"No one, sadly. Both me and my husbands parents are estranged from each other, Iruma's fault once again, such a troublesome child." How the FUCK was a child responsible for that? "But we'll be sure to send him plenty of love. Thank you for teaching him so much, Aizawa sir!" The dial tone came shortly after.
He looked down at the deformed stress toy in his hand. He gave it one good squeeze, and it exploded from the pressure. How anyone as happy as Suzuki came from such awful, LOATHSOME people like that would remain one of life's greatest mysteries.
He took a five minute break before going down the list into the next set of parents. Hopefully this would be the ONLY case of child abuse he would be aware of today.
==
"NEIN!" Runi Sato screamed. "Fifteen percent peanut butter to eighty five precent chocolate! Otherwise the entire dish is ruined! Do I need to chop off heads!?"
"No, Sweet-Sama! We'll fix it right away, Sweet-Sama!" His employees saluted at the same time, correcting their horrendous mistake.
"See to it that you do! If my kid can master this at twelve, I sure as hell expect grown ass adults to get the basics right!" Honestly these workers were garbage, the only reason he kept them around was because they had some great choreography.
"Sir, a phone call." Really, now of all times?
"Put it on hold, who would be calling now of all times when I'm in the middle of work?"
"UA Highschool sir." His child's school was calling!? He picked it up in an instant.
"Hello, this is Runi Sato. Did something happen to my child? Is he hurt? Do I need to whack a few ruffians into the ground!?" He wasn't above caramelizing a few insides till they were sickly sweet.
"That won't be necessary. I'm just calling to inform you that Parents Day is approaching, and I need confirmation of who's officially coming."
Parents Day!? An opportunity to emberas his child doesn't come often. "I shall join him in the festivities. The mother shall not be attending." He did miss her …
"Understandable, at least someone is joining this time." What was that? "Thank you for your time sir, I understand you're probably busy."
"Oh not at all! The factory practically runs itself…at least it SHOULD BE!" Runi yelled as his employees started scurrying all over. "As long as they keep the Chocolate Waterful running smoothly, everything will be fine." It was the only way to stir it just right.
"Chocolate wat-no Shota, you have a lot of parents to call, don't fall down the rabbit hole." They didn't carry rabbits, not any more at least. Too many kids complained about chocolate bunnies being made from the real thing. "Have a nice day." Ah, now he had to prepare some special treats. He must bring out something special for the families. Time to bring out the everlasting gobstoppers!
==
"Okay people, we need a hostage situation in play." Vlad spoke up. "Any suggestions?"
"I say just let me take the role." Midnight grinned, holding up her lovely wip. "Knock out all the hostages, and anyone coming close can get a little taste of punishment ." She licked her lips. "It is the most effective strategy."
"It's also easy to find work arounds. They just need to hold their breath long enough." Shota shot down. "Like we keep telling our students, the world's full of unfairness. They need to remember life's not full of easy answers to problems.
"If you want to be unfair I can just box them in cement, carry them from a precarious place uneasy to access." Cementos offered.
"He said it was unfair, not impossible." Mic deadpanned. "How about I just keep them all in a building and use my quirk the moment anybody starts showing up? There's ways to work around it but it also forces them to be at a distance. Shota can even work with me from the inside, deactivate their quirks
"No, I'm not going to be in this." Everyone looked at Aizawa strangely. "It's for their growth, they can't know I'm involved, a villain having a random quirk similar to a teacher is more believable."
"I could just clone myself and have each one guard a hostage." Ectoplasm added into the conversation. "Just place a disguise on each one and they won't even know I'm using a quirk."
"I'm out, my quirk would kill the hostages, kind of a mood killer." It was little more than a mood killer Thirteen.
"We could get All Might in a suit and tell him to hold back for an average strength quirk." Midnight suggested.
"If you think that moron knows how to hold back, go ahead." Damn it, he made a very valid argument.
"It's hard doing hostage situations." Mic groaned. "It would be so much better for other stuff, like stealing jewelry, I can just break all the protective glass easily."
"I personally think of some good old blackmail." Midnight smirked. "Get them sleeping in the right position and you're good to go."
"Why are you guys talking about being actual villains, in front of pro heroes?" Thirteen asked with a head tilt.
"Ever since we were kids we suppressed immoral thoughts due to the ideology of being a hero." Cementos explained. "Sometimes it bubbles up and it's better to just talk about it instead of acting, at least according to Hound Dog."
"I occasionally feel like killing a few people, but beating Mic's ass for being a moron usually quells that anger." Shota said without any form of sarcasm, not that he knew how to begin with.
"If it keeps you out of jail, I am happy to be your punching bag." Mic grinned. "Okay, what's the most childish thing you guys have done with your quirks? Pranks and stuff."
Oh she had a LOT of stories for this. "Hm, one time when I was six, I knocked my dad out so I could take extra dessert when he wasn't looking. And there was this other time in middle school I 'played doctor' with my first crush.
"Oh, how did it go?" Mic asked.
"It went from 'playing doctor' to 'playing surgeon', now he bats for the other team." She didn't know whether or not the guy was already curious or if she legitimately turned him off from girls.
"I once felt like not going to school but wanted to keep my perfect attendance, so I sent in a clone to do it for me." Ectoplasm added in.
"Perfect attendance? I was expecting something bigger." Mic groaned. "All I did was keep up with my friends whenever they tried to take naps."
"I was that friend, and I will take revenge soon." Aizawa growled.
"I never actually did pranks when I was a kid." Everyone, even Shota, turned in disbelief at Thirteen. "What? It didn't seem like something I'd be into."
"You are like the sweet summer child of our generation." Cementos spoke bluntly. So someone could be as innocent as Suzuki. That was either a very good or a very troubling sign.
==
Nedzu talked with Toshinori as they walked. "I know you're busy, but I really appreciate this."
"Of course, on the off chance he really is alive, I'll find him." It was a lot to juggle, but it was for the sake of the students.
"I get he had a lot of quirks but … the top of his skull was gone, how do you survive the brain damage alone?"
"Not every regeneration quirk requires the brain to be intact. Sometimes all it takes is for a single cell to survive." Nedzy hummed. "I can't imagine him coming out of the situation completely unscathed, though. If he's alive, then he'd be severely crippled in the best case scenario."
"I hope that bastard's eating through a straw wherever he is. Hell's too good for a monster like him." Nedzu could confirm that for a fact. The Netherworld was quite the pleasant place, aside from the general selfishness and apathy their culture promoted. "There's something that worries me more." The principal added. "What did you say happened when he placed multiple quirk on people before?"
The man blinked, a hand to his chin. "They went brain dead, unable to handle the mental load of multiple quirks."
"And the Nomu are corpses, already brain dead, and theoretically, someone could give them as many quirks as they like."
"But how do you even use a corpse? Even necromantic quirks that interact with dead tissue aren't as advanced as that, are they?"
"I…have a few theories on how that's possible." Theories that went far beyond what the human world considered normal, even with quirks in the picture. The idea of a terrifyingly powerful man such as All For One gaining access to the supernatural was a horrifying thought. "Nothing concrete for now, but I'll get back to you on that front." After another session with Sullivan. No tables could be left unturned for this.
"Thank you again." All Might opened the door to the huddled teachers. "What's going on here?" He asked.
"We're tapping on tangents." Yamada explained. "Say, what would you guys do for a hostage situation?"
"Just tie them up and threaten to crush a skull." All Might was just like his quirk, simple, but ungodly effective. That actually described Suzuki Iruma to a T as well.
"And that's why you're not involved with the planning for Parents day." Aizawa rolled his eyes. "I know I'm going to regret this, but do you have any ideas, Nedzu?"
"Oh quite simple really." He chuckled. "Place the parents at the center of the maze and close it off, then use multiple pre placed traps to slowly torture any heroes that dare approach through the use of cameras." Nedzu chuckled. "They'd never make it past layer three." Out of thirty.
"Knew I'd regret it." Ah, there was the frown he knew and loved. "I have the list for parents day, what about you Kan?"
"All my kid's guardians are coming too. Some were easier than others." The blood hero groaned. "Shiozaki took half an hour because her old man spent the entire time preaching before I could get a word in."
"Can I see the list?" Yagi grabbed it, looking the list over. "Oh … Fumi Todoroki … I guess I shouldn't have sent Endeavor that fax then."
"Oh, didn't I tell you? The fax has a bit of a delay. He won't get it until Parent's day ends." Power Loader spoke, taking a sip of coffee as he worked on the microwave.
"At least that checks out." The man continued flipping. "I see Young Suzuki has no one …"
"Believe me, that's for the best." Aizawa clenched his fist. "No one in this room would be able to resist punching and or strangling them if you saw them in person."
"Well we can't have the boy alone so …" The man gave a smile. "I guess I'll have to show up as Toshinori Yagi."
There was a beat of silence. "So when Hawks sent that tweet in the private hero chat about him being a secret love child …"
"I'm just his trainer!" Nedzu could set the record straight…but he wouldn't. This was far too much fun.
==
Recovery Girl checked the clock, seeing it was time, as she made her way into the teachers lounge. She walked past the sleeping teachers and grabbed the emergency blankets and pillows kept inside of the wall. "Sometimes it's just too much." Sometimes it felt like she watched over the teacher's safety just as much as the students, maybe even more so.
At least Aizawa kept a decent sleep schedule, even if it was inconsistent. Considering here he was gearing up for the night. "You are labeled as the backbone of UA for a reason, the big guy can't carry all that weight." She turned to the restless Toshi, who kept turning in his sleep.
"Yep, even in his sleep, he can't help but keep moving." She sighed. "Ready to meet the parents? My cane is ready to whack the Suzuki's into the ICU." How could that kid have that much malnutrition and not be skin and bones?
"The bastards aren't coming, so Yagi is taking their place." Ah yes, the secret love child joke. She would take it to the ends of earth in order to keep it alive and well, just like the Bunny-sensei and trash-zombie jokes.
"Probably for the best. I don't feel like going to jail for murder when I'm this old anyways." She sighed. Maybe another time. "Being a hero and a teacher. One wonders how anyone can find the time for both."
"That's why they made coffee and energy drinks. A healthy dose of spite also can do wonders." True, she's seen what All Might went through when battling All For One … the fact he lasted as long as he did was sheer will alone.