Chapter 25: The Service Club? Hikigaya the Alchemist!
In Hikigaya's view, it wasn't important whether Horikita Manabu and Nagumo Miyabi were the masterminds or not. If they obtained the exam papers, the senpai's efforts to withhold information would only serve to further advantage Hikigaya and his group.
So, they just needed to find a way to trade for the exam papers and, while they were at it, make sure the senpai didn't have the energy to interfere with the first-years' exam.
Hikigaya recalled the club mentioned during their morning conversation and quietly took a deep breath.
"I plan to establish the Service Club!"
"Huh—?" ×3
The three people in the classroom simultaneously let out prolonged, questioning, and strange sounds.
"Hikigaya-kun, that's too repulsive. This is now an ordinary demerit," Sakayanagi slightly raised her head and looked seriously at Hikigaya.
'Th-This girl is actually worried about me with a straight face! St-Stop! Don't look at me with those eyes; it feels even more hurtful!'
"This criminal's personality is too warped; he's fundamentally beyond saving." Yukinoshita's eyes emitted a coldness like dry ice, and she displayed a look of nausea, as if about to vomit.
'Wow, it's so blinding! That gaze is so blinding! What's wrong? Not only my mind, but my body is starting to hurt too.'
"A m-maid uniform or something, I haven't worn it yet, but if it's for the club uniform, I... I still can't accept it. But if you want to see it, I can wear it privately for... Aaaah! What strange things are you making me say! Pervert, lecher, Hikigaya Hachiman!" Kamuro glared fiercely at Hikigaya.
'No, my name isn't even an insult, is it?
'You guys should at least let me finish what I'm saying first, it's so annoying! To be honest, if my will were a little weaker, you'd all be in trouble. I would definitely be howling and throwing chairs, so please be grateful for my extraordinarily strong nerves.
But then again, the word "service" rarely appears in daily life and can usually only be used in specific contexts, such as a maid serving her master. So, it's understandable that these three would misunderstand.'
"Will you listen to me first... This Service Club is not what you think."
"The Service Club. Wealthy people dispensing charity to the poor are called volunteers. For example, providing meals to students without points, or offering manpower to busy in-school shops. Lending a hand to those in need is the content of this club's activities."
Hikigaya crossed his arms confidently, announcing his plan to the three.
"That sounds quite normal. It's unbelievable that you could have a normal thought in your brain... Can I understand this club as a club that serves the students?" Yukinoshita watched Hikigaya with her dark blue eyes.
"Could you please stop subtly slandering me... But your understanding isn't wrong. The club's activities involve students volunteering their help to shops on campus that are short-staffed." Hikigaya nodded and then shook his head.
"Then, Hikigaya, how will you convince the students to do volunteer work? By using the club member's five thousand point subsidy per month?" Kamuro asked somewhat confusedly.
"Ha," Hikigaya let out a light laugh, "The club's point subsidy might indeed attract some students without points to join the club, but such a small amount of points is simply not enough to attract those senpai who have already experienced many special exams."
"Then, Hikigaya-kun, what exactly are you thinking?" Sakayanagi looked at Hikigaya with an interested gaze.
"I just said it, didn't I? The club's main service target is actually the shops on campus that are short-staffed. Let me explain it in more detail.
We'll have the club members go to the school's shops to help as volunteers for a few days first. During this process, we will take some photos as evidence of the club's activities, but this is only the first step of the entire plan.
After receiving help from the students, the shops can free up some manpower, reduce their working hours and intensity, and have more time to release new products and provide services to more people. Thus, to gain more profit, the shops will naturally want to increase publicity and attract more customers.
And at this point, the club will negotiate with these shops, stating that in addition to providing free manpower, the club will also provide them with some promotional services.
The only thing these shops need to pay are some 'club sponsorship fees' and 'publicity fees.' If a shop doesn't agree, we just need to find another one—after all, there are short-staffed shops everywhere, and someone will always be willing to pay...
Next, after we receive the sponsorship and publicity fees, we will distribute this money, along with the money given by the school, as a 'point subsidy' to the students who participated in the club activities and put in the labor, while also taking a small cut for 'club funds.'
Finally, we just need to have these students who received a salary... no, who received a point subsidy, advertise it in their class or bring some friends to spend at the shop."
'See, it's simple, right? A world where everyone benefits is complete.'
"In addition, being able to receive a large number of private points just by helping 'for free' can also attract senpais to join the club, as earning a large number of points through one's own efforts sounds very appealing. At that time, we just need to casually ask them for a copy of this midterm exam's test paper.
By working hard, they can receive extra income outside of the exam. This way, the second-year and third-year Class C and Class D students won't have to follow anyone's orders anymore. In other words, this 'volunteer work' that provides a large number of points gives those students the confidence to rebel against Horikita Manabu and Nagumo Miyabi.
As long as these two are busy dealing with the unrest in their own grades, they naturally won't have the energy to interfere with the first-years' exam anymore."
Hikigaya closed his eyes, introducing his plan clearly and logically while calculating the possible outcomes in his mind.
Speaking of which, this idea originated from Hikigaya himself.
When Hikigaya was in middle school, he found out that the cram school would waive the tuition fee for students with good grades. That is to say, as long as he applied for the scholarship, all the cram school tuition money he received from his parents would belong to him.
And now, the students will work hard to obtain a large number of points, the shops will have more manpower, and their promotion will be effective, so they will continue to cooperate with the club.
And I can make a profit from it—a good idea that kills three birds with one stone.
'That's right, this is my secret Alchemy; please call me Hikigaya the Alchemist'!
When Hikigaya opened his eyes again, he saw Sakayanagi, Yukinoshita, and Kamuro staring intently at him.
"What are you doing?"
"Ah? Oh, well... it's indeed a plan that serves multiple purposes."
"Yes, I didn't expect you to be able to suggest something like this..."
"So cool... No, n-nothing."
Hearing Hikigaya's question, Sakayanagi, Yukinoshita, and Kamuro came back to their senses, their faces slightly flushed, and they responded haltingly.
'How to put it... Hikigaya usually has a pair of rotten dead-fish eyes and spouts all sorts of strange, depressing, twisted logic, but now, closing his eyes and analyzing the situation in a serious, strategic manner...'
'I-I'm sorry, I might sound like a fangirl saying this, but this sudden contrast makes it feel like my heart was shot through with a "bang."'
"I feel like this process sounds so familiar... Wait a minute, this... isn't this just getting students to work part-time?" Kamuro clenched her right fist and suddenly smacked the palm of her left hand.
"As for the result, the shops get the help, promotion, and customer traffic; the students get experience and living expenses; the club gets a large number of results to report to the school, and he takes a cut to get a large number of private points; and the school just has an ordinary club that has students do volunteer work. Because the students aren't taking money directly from the shop owners, we can't definitively say it violates the school rule against working part-time..."
Yukinoshita grew more and more astonished as she spoke, completely failing to anticipate that this extremely strange-sounding club could bring so many benefits. It was as if it had been planned thousands of times, with every step being so reasonable and logical.
"In addition to these benefits, he can also use this club to gain the favor of a large number of students and can even manipulate the senpais in reverse..." Sakayanagi also showed a surprised look. Hikigaya's strategy casually bypassed the school's rule prohibiting students from working part-time and even launched a brilliant counterattack without meeting the mastermind.
"And because the school won't allow clubs with similar functions to exist, others won't be able to copy this method even if they know about it..." Kamuro stared at Hikigaya as if she had seen a monster.
"Every step is perfectly timed to hit the human weakness of seeking profit and avoiding harm... This strategy is as precise and elegant as a surgeon's scalpel."
Concluding with every word, Sakayanagi couldn't help but gently applaud.
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