Ronan's movements grew slower, more predictable. I could tell he was nearing his limit, but I didn't stop. Round after round, I continued to lunge at him, using all of this pent-up aggression as fuel.
His fur was matted with streaks of both fresh and dried blood.
I need to stop. He won't be able to hold out much longer.
I needed to stop— but I didn't want to. Though the relief that this mock fight brought was minimal, it was still a hundred times better than being locked away in my room.
Ronan's shifted body slammed into me, but the blow lacked force. I seized the opening, driving forward to fling him aside.
My eyes tracked his movements, calculating the best moment to launch my next attack, but the instant he landed, I knew that my time was up.
He crashed into a tree and collapsed to the ground, unmoving. Panic seized me, and I rushed over to his side.
His eyes were shut, and the majority of his body was covered in blood. It didn't look good– at all.
I quickly unshifted and rushed up to his side. "Ronan, are you okay?"
With difficulty, he managed to open his eyes. I could tell he was trying to say that he was fine, but I've never seen him so beaten up before. Not even after the last time I lost control.
Guilt gnawed at me. He was in this state because of me. I saw the signs, I knew that he couldn't keep up– and still, I kept going.
"Dammit!" I slammed my fist into the tree trunk in front of me, tearing the top layer of skin. "Some protector you are," I muttered to myself. I was supposed to be keeping my pack safe, not beating them into a pulp.
The guilt only made me angrier. Whatever thin threads of control I'd managed to repair snapped, one by one. I could feel myself slipping once again.
No. I can't lose it now! I need to get Ronan to a healer.
It was too late. My blood boiled as every muscle convulsed. Static filled my head, blotting out any attempt to think straight. The buzzing in the back of my head became louder, causing my concentration to crack.
I stumbled backwards, distancing myself from Ronan. There was no way that I would trust myself around him in this state. Especially not after what I had already done.
I closed my eyes, forcing slow breaths— until a foreign scent cut through the air. No… not completely foreign. It belonged to her. The human.
My head snapped towards the direction of the scent, just beyond the trees. I could instantly feel that strange sensation welling up inside me.
Fuck!
I knew if that human came any closer, there was no way she would leave this forest alive. And that would only complicate things. As much as I wanted, I knew the pack wasn't ready for a full-out war with the humans.
Grinding my teeth, I unleashed my aura, letting it ripple through the woods as a warning.
A few brief moments later, her scent finally faded. Whoever she was with received my warning.
I took another deep breath as I turned my attention back to Ronan. He had unshifted and was lying unconscious on the ground.
As I moved toward him, I realized the noise and fury inside me had quieted enough to stay in control. Enough to carry my friend home.
-
"Let me know the moment he wakes."
"I'll send word right away, Alpha." The healer bowed her head respectfully before turning to tend to Ronan's wounds.
He remained unconscious and covered in blood. I watched the healer apply different herbal medicines to the gashes and cuts that covered his body, painting him green.
Forgive me, friend.
I took one final look before leaving. I could already feel the maddening rage begin to spread through me once again. Staying here would only fuel my anger through the guilt I was feeling. I could no longer trust myself.
When I entered my room, it was spotless. All of the broken glass and furniture had been replaced, erasing any signs of my earlier rampage.
A spread of food waited on the table by the window, but I ignored it. Appetite was the last thing I had left after today.
Unfortunate. It smells like curry chicken.
I sank onto the bed. My mind was chaos. Nothing that used to help seemed to work anymore, and now it's gotten so bad that I'd knocked my best friend unconscious.
But I couldn't even spare him another thought because the unrest was already creeping back. I was right where I'd been this morning— hanging by a thread.
Just as I closed my eyes, I heard a soft knock on my door.
"Alpha, the human ambassador has retired for the night."
My brows drew together. This human had arrived at the worst possible time.
"Enter."
Rell entered with her head bowed. She remained silent, waiting for me to speak first.
"How did it go? Did she do or say anything unusual?" I asked.
"No, she's been quiet. She showed interest in the library and listened closely whenever I explained things. My overall impression is that she's... kind."
"Hmm. Continue to keep an eye on her and report anything suspicious right away," I said with a frown. "And keep her away from me."
"Understood," she said, bowing slightly.
"Dismissed."
I waited until Rell left, then slammed my fist into the mattress. "To think that a human is staying under the same roof as me. After all they've done to my pack."
Disgust churned in my gut. It was like welcoming a poisonous snake into your own home. But I needed to keep her close. It would only be more dangerous if she stayed somewhere else.
My head was already beginning to spin. All I wanted to do was get some sleep. It was the only time of the day when I could escape the constant mental pressure, even if just for a short while.