The Day the World Got a Patch Note
It started with a sound — a single, crisp ding echoing across every corner of the world.
Phones, crystals, and even random rocks began vibrating with light. Holographic text filled the sky.
[SYSTEM UPDATE — VERSION 2.0 INSTALLED]Global Integration Complete.New Features:
Mandatory Guild Registration
Cross-Nation Mana Indexing
Aura Rarity Adjustments
Guild Rankings and Leaderboards
"Green Aura" classified as Legendary Tier.
Please enjoy your upgraded apocalypse experience!
People screamed. Nations panicked. Economies died (again).
And somewhere in a quiet, humble farm, Choi Jaehyun choked on his soup.
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN LEGENDARY TIER?! I'M JUST FARMING!"
Yeonjin calmly scrolled through the patch notes on her glowing tablet. "It says your aura is now considered 'world-changing potential.' Congratulations, dear."
Minho saluted proudly. "Our son's a world-ending vegetable!"
"Dad, stop saying that!"
The Council Emergency Broadcast
An hour later, every major broadcast channel — holo or otherwise — flashed with the crest of the Global Awakeners Council.
Council Chairwoman (stern, glowing aura): "To all citizens. The System 2.0 update has made guild affiliation mandatory. Please report to your nearest guild center within 24 hours to register."
Reporters shouted questions.
"What about the Green Awakeners?""Are they dangerous?""Is it true that one of them purifies entire forests by sleeping?"
The Chairwoman hesitated, sweating slightly. "...That case is… under observation."
Cut to Jaehyun's farm, where Bongyu was drooling on a pumpkin, radiating divine light.
The Guild Recruitment War
Within hours, guilds began swarming like vultures.Helicopters, drones, even teleport circles popped up around Jaehyun's farm.
Jaehyun stepped outside with his shovel. "If anyone steps on my cabbage, I swear—"
A man in a silver suit leapt forward. "Mr. Choi Jaehyun! The Golden Phoenix Guild would like to offer you a signing bonus of five million credits!"
Another shouted, "The Iron Fang Clan will double it!"
A third one screamed, "The Peaceful Carrot Society offers lifelong free salad!"
Jaehyun blinked. "...Tempting."
Yeonjin smacked the back of his head. "You're not joining anyone offering salad as currency."
Minho raised a hand. "But that's still more than my pension."
System 2.0 Glitches Begin
As the guild chaos raged, new System notifications kept glitching into existence above people's heads.
[Congratulations! You have joined the "Household Guild — Choi Family."]
Guild Rank: ???
Leader: Yeonjin
Co-Leader: Minho
Mascot: Bongyu (Level: Unknown)Average sanity level: unstable
Jaehyun froze."WHAT DO YOU MEAN 'HOUSEHOLD GUILD'?!"
Yeonjin smiled serenely. "It auto-assigned us, dear. Family unity bonus."
Minho cheered. "We're officially a guild now! Can I make the motto?"
Jaehyun: "No."Minho: "'We Grow or We Die!'"Jaehyun: "Dad, please stop."
The Political Panic Meeting
Meanwhile, in the Council's sky fortress, world leaders gathered for an emergency meeting.
Projected screens showed clips of grass growing on skyscrapers, vines bursting through subway tunnels, and kids accidentally summoning forests in their classrooms.
Council Chairwoman: "At this rate, the Green aura will overtake the elemental hierarchy. If uncontrolled, they could… farm the planet."
Minister of Defense: "You say that like it's a bad thing."
Minister of Energy: "Photosynthesis is now a power source. We're shutting down the reactors."
Foreign Guild Representative: "We've already lost three guilds to 'agricultural assimilation.' They started farming potatoes instead of fighting."
The Chairwoman buried her face in her hands. "The apocalypse has turned into a gardening contest."
Back at the Farm — Jaehyun's Meltdown, Part 2
While the world debated, Jaehyun stood before a literal mountain of letters, recruitment flyers, and sponsorship deals.
He tore one open.
"Become the Face of Future Farming! Green Cola — Now with Chlorophyll!"
He screamed into the void. "I'M A FARMER, NOT AN INFLUENCER!"
Yeonjin calmly poured tea. "You're trending, dear. #GreenDaddy is top three globally."
Jaehyun: "WHO STARTED THAT HASHTAG?!"
Bongyu giggled in his sleep.
The Real Twist — System's New Quest Chain
As Jaehyun tried to bury himself under a haystack to escape attention, the system chimed again.
[NEW MAIN QUEST: "Operation Growth front"]Objective: Establish an official Green Guild recognized by the Global Council.Requirements:
Recruit at least 5 Green Awakeners.
Demonstrate sustainable mana balance across 3 regions.
Host one public demonstration.Reward: Title — "Root of Civilization."Penalty for failure: Global mana collapse.
Jaehyun stared at it for a full minute, unmoving.Then he whispered, "Public demonstration…? As in… a presentation?"
Yeonjin: "Don't worry, dear. I'll prepare your speech."Minho: "I'll bring snacks!"Bongyu: "...Nap."
Jaehyun clutched his head. "I don't need snacks or naps, I need a time machine!"
— The New Age of Green
By nightfall, the world had changed again.Cities glowed faintly green. Forests began humming with life. The council struggled to regulate the chaos.
And in the midst of it all, Jaehyun sat on his porch, exhausted, staring at the newest notification hovering before him.
[Guild Formation Request Approved]
Guild Name: "The Fertile Few"Motto: "We grow under pressure."
Leader: Choi Jaehyun.
He sighed."Of course it's me."
Yeonjin patted his shoulder. "Smile, dear. You're a national hero."
He stared into the distance, dead inside."…I just wanted to grow bok choy."