Vermallelia clung to the Oathless's shirt, pulling it tight and hiding her face in his back.
"Bleh, you are choking me," he complained.
"Sorry," she let go of the shirt but remained close. "This place…" Her head darted left and right, scanning the mall. It was all too much—too many sounds, too many people, too many lights. "I can't stand it."
"Yeah, it can get pretty crowded. I'm not a fan either."
A passing Labrador barked at the rat-girl, and she squealed, leaping onto the Oathless's back.
"Bleh—choking me—again."
She loosened her grip around his neck but wrapped her legs tighter around his waist to compensate.
"Calm down," the dog owner yelled, pulling on the collar, then looked to Kai apologetically. "She's usually chill, I don't know what got into her."
"Sometimes, animals can sense magic," Vira whispered in the Oathless's ear. "The dog must have smelled the Personification spell."
Kai nodded in response to both Vira and the dog owner, then the latter pulled harder on the collar, dragging his pet away.
"It's alright," he said to Vermallelia. "The scary dog is gone, you can come down now."
The rat-girl blushed. She had jumped on his back in a moment of fright, without thinking, and now became embarrassingly aware of her body pressing against his broad back, her legs encircling his now narrow and fit waist, and her nose wrinkling at the fresh scent of his shampooed hair.
I really can't call him fugly anymore, she mourned, then shook the thought out of her head. "No," she pouted.
"No?"
"I won't come down. It's safer up here."
"You expect me to carry you on my back all day?"
"Coming to this crowded den of humanity was your idea."
"We are here to buy you a place to live," he started walking toward the pet-store.
"I told you, I am fine where I am. You were the one who insisted I take a look before I made my decision."
"What about everything you said when we first met? About the fear of getting poisoned, or stomped, or eaten, or whatever? Wouldn't you rather have a clean place where you can be safe and have a steady supply of food and water?"
"I already have that—in your room."
"Sure, when you are in your human-form, but that won't last forever."
"Haeh?"
"What do you think will happen when I find a girlfriend? When Vira moves on to another godchild and takes her magic with her? You will become a rat again—and remain that way for the rest of your life. When that happens… I want you to have a decent place to stay… You deserve better than sewer drains and cockroaches."
Goosebumps spread over her skin, and she became speechless for a long moment, touched by how he worried for her. "I appreciate your concern," she said eventually, then smirked. "But you don't have to worry about any of that."
"Why not?" he asked as they entered the store.
"Because you will never find a girlfriend."
He flicked her legs off of him and jerked back sharply, dropping her to the ground behind him. She squealed as she hit the floor.
"I'm looking for a cage, or an aquarium," he told the clerk. "It's for my stupid rat."
***
Vermallelia ran down the aisle, marveling at the shelves with starry-eyed wonder, while Kai hung back, giving her space to look around as long as she liked.
He smiled. He knew she'd come around once she saw her options with her own eyes.
A boy brushed past the Oathless, running down the same aisle, and a woman followed him. She stopped to glance at the Oathless, and recognition hit them both.
"Evelyn?"
"You are… John's friend."
He grimaced. 'Friend' was a funny way to put it. "Ah… Yeah, sure." He looked after the boy. "Is that your son?"
"Nephew. I don't have any children."
"Three marriages and no children?" he blurted, then began stuttering through an apology. "Ah—"
"You sound like my third husband," she cut him off with a chuckle.
He squirmed at that, and she smirked, reveling in his discomfort.
"I've always preferred the role of the 'cool aunt' to that of a mother… figured my time was better spent on my career…" Her smirk turned sad.
"You seem to regret it," he noted cautiously.
She tilted her head, giving it some thought. "Sometimes… then I remember how insufferable children can be and feel quite proud of my decision."
Children can be insufferable, Vira sent telepathically. And godchildren doubly so.
The Oathless frowned, unamused.
"Kai, look! This one has a skull in it!" The rat-girl pointed at an aquarium with a skull-shaped nest inside it.
"Whoa!" the boy came over. He was only several inches shorter than her and seemed to be ten years old at most. "Is it real?"
"It's just plastic, darling."
The two groaned in disappointment.
"Who's the girl?" Evelyn asked Kai.
"Ah…" he hesitated. He should have thought of an explanation before they left the house. "My cousin."
"Is that so?" The woman scanned the rat-girl, who came to the mall wearing a pair of pink shorts and a white T-shirt in place of her usual maid outfit. It was hard to place her age, as she was small but had a full head of white hair that didn't seem to be dyed. Either way, she looked nothing like the Oathless. "I don't see the resemblance."
"Yeah, she is adopted, poor thing."
"Could you ask her something for me?" The fairy godmother whispered. "Last time you spoke to her, she said that she was happy, even though she was alone…" Vira hand absently reached for her star pendant. "Did she really mean it?"
He hesitated; he had asked the woman personal questions before, but that one felt especially invasive. Then again, he had to admit he was also curious. He relayed the question, more or less word for word, then added: "How can you be happy alone?"
The woman considered him for a long moment before answering. "I believe that there are two types of happiness," she raised a finger, "one which comes from loving yourself," she raised another. "And one which comes from loving others. These are not mutually exclusive, of course, and you should strive for both, if you can."
"And you can't?"
She scoffed. "If I could find someone who was just right—who wanted the same things I wanted, whose strengths matched my weaknesses, and who accepted me for who I am… I'd be a fool not to give it a chance."
Kai crossed his arms. "If that's true, then why do you say you are better off alone?"
"Because one of these loves isn't as easy to get as the other. You can change yourself, or learn to love yourself for who you are, but when another person comes into the picture…" she sighed. "It's difficult, complicated in ways I can't even begin to explain—especially not to you."
"Ouch."
"It's not an insult—if you have never been in a committed relationship, then I don't expect you to understand. Can you imagine what it's like to share your life with another person? Every morning when you wake up, every night when you go to sleep, every place you go to, every decision that you make—they always have a say in it, because your life isn't entirely yours anymore; it is partly theirs. Even if you love them dearly, eventually this level of intimacy will drive you insane, and when that time comes, how you deal with that 'insanity' determines whether your relationship succeeds, or fails."
He was struggling to relate to what she was saying, and his thoughts ended up wandering to his father's—at times—oppressive demands. Maybe it wasn't exactly the same, but at least it seemed similar enough for him to wrap his head around.
"I think I see the difficulty."
"I'm not trying to discourage you, darling. Relationships can be wonderful, but they require a lot of work, and sometimes you are going to find yourself in a relationship that just costs too much. It's up to you to decide whether—"
"Kai, over here! You have to look at this one!"
He heard Vermallelia call from around the corner of the aisle and sent Evelyn an apologetic glance before coming over.
"This one," she knelt beside an aquarium the size of a bathtub. Plastic tubes swerved within the enclosure like snakes, a big running wheel was stationed at each side, nets hung down from the top, and a tree-like statuette spread its branches into multiple climbable platforms. "I want this one!"
"Have you heard nothing the clerk said? You can't stay in—" he paused, conscious of how his words would sound in the ears of the boy standing beside the rat-girl and the woman who was approaching behind him. "Rats," he cleared his throat, "can't stay in a glass aquarium; they need a cage with bars for ventilation. And besides, this cage is big enough for a whole pack of rats, and it costs a lot, too."
Vermallelia pouted.
Kai crossed his arms. "Sorry to disappoint you, but you'll have to find something else."
"So… can I have it, Auntie Evelyn?" the boy asked, his hopeful eyes looking up at the woman.
"Why do you need it?" the rat-girl asked.
"For my hamsters."
Hamsters, she seethed. People see a rat and run away screaming, but hamsters? Everybody loves hamsters… What's so great about them, anyway?
"Maybe we should look around some more, darling," the woman suggested. "Your mother will kill me if we come back with something this big."
It was the boy's turn to pout, and reluctantly, both he and the rat-girl were pulled away from the large aquarium, going their separate ways.
***
Kai strained under the weight of the rat-girl mounted on his back and the equipment-filled bags he held in his hands.
"I really wanted that big aquarium," she moaned.
He had spent a small fortune on her cage, bedding, food, and toys, and still, she complained. Children really were insufferable, he mused.
"Once we are out of the mall, you are helping me carry some of this stuff."
She forced a yawn. "But I'm so tired after all the cleaning and running around I did today."
"Ah, yeah? Then maybe I should lay you down somewhere to sleep while I go get some food. We can carry everything together after you've had a good rest."
"Haeh? You'll eat without me?"
"There is a fast-food joint on the way home, and I was planning to stop by and treat you to something, but… if you are too tired—"
"I'm actually feeling a lot better now, so—"
"Good," he said as they left the mall. "Then you wouldn't mind helping me carry some of your things."
***
They stopped at a burger place, and, per usual, Vermallelia only managed to get through half of what she ordered before filling up.
While he ate, Kai scrolled through a social app on his phone and stumbled upon Nekoko's special announcement—a performance she was scheduled to have during the upcoming Aura Gaming Expo, several months from now. It had been a while since he had watched any of her streams—his real life meeting with her left a bitter taste in his mouth, a thing he felt conflicted about. How she really looked didn't change anything about the quality of her content, or how much he enjoyed watching her in the past, and yet that feeling of disappointment after he saw her nagged at him…
He put away his phone, banishing that train of thought. "Alright," he got up, taking a last bite and wiping his mouth. "Time to—" he stopped as his eyes fell on the rat-girl, lying asleep on the bench across from him.
He sighed, his instinct telling him to go over, shake her out of her slumber, and force her to carry some of the bags. It would only be fair; it was her stuff.
But she looks so cute, sleeping like that, he thought. I could let her rest, lift her on my back, and carry the bags myself… it would be heavy, but nothing I can't handle.
Nothing I should handle, he argued with himself. It's her things, and I paid for them; the least she can do is carry them herself.
So, which is it? He stared at her. Wake her up, or let her sleep?
It was a choice… a small, inconsequential choice, hardly the fate of the world, and yet he stood there, frozen, unable to decide who he wanted to be.
"Kai?" The rat-girl rubbed her eyes.
"Come on," he said softly, helping her up and grabbing the bags—leaving nothing for her to carry. "Let's go home."