"Sushi Aquarium, sir!" I exclaimed, raising my hand to the waiter in front of me, who gave me a disinterested look despite my enthusiasm.
"Yeah, yeah… It'll be done in around, like, I don't know, thirty minutes."
"Okay, sir!" I exclaimed once more, but the waiter just walked away with an unenthusiastic sigh.
Gurgle, gurgle, rumble, rumble!
I felt a sharp pain shoot through my body—especially my abdomen—making me wrap my arms around my stomach.
I abruptly stood up and rushed to the bathroom, wobbling as I ran.
***
I ran down the seemingly endless hallway and burst into the bathroom, but as I did, I fell—or rather, feather-fell—downwards.
I was in water, a deep, bottomless sea filled with fish.
"Look at this guy. Where are his gills and his tail?"
"Why are his flippers so big?"
I could suddenly hear multiple, incessant murmurs all around me, making it sound like a concert. I could hear the fish that swam around me.
***
I loosened the arms hugging my abdomen and let myself fall.
Then, with a muffled thud, my back landed on the sea floor.
From above, I saw the silhouette of a woman.
She had big, long, blue hair tied in a low ponytail with an orange headband.
She stopped overhead, tilting her head curiously with a smile. "Hey, what are you doing in here?"
I didn't answer, not because I didn't want to, but because I was holding my breath.
"Ahhhhhhh… You're a gill-less hue-man. No need, no need. You are far from home. Come. I will show you the way."
She began swimming away, not bothering to look behind her, as she expected me to follow.
And so I did.
"Welcome to the Alkaline Fraiser, hue-man. It is the threshold between the human and the Aquatic Realm. Once you go into the ocean, rivers, baths, or anything water-related—you're within our realm. From your perspective, you see fish. From mine, I see hue-mans like yourself."
I pointed at her as if to ask, "Wait, but I can see you're human?"
She chuckled before shaking her head at my nonsense.
"It is because I'm similar to you. I am a hue-man, but I am also a fish."
The lady and I continued on our way before stopping at a barrier.
"This is the Aquarium Border, a barrier where the Gods observe. See? Look forward."
When I heard that, I looked forward and saw a humongous orb that looked as if it were viewed through a fisheye lens.
I jolted and jumped back slightly.
"Hee, hah, hahahahaha!" The lady held her stomach as she laughed.
"Do not worry; they cannot touch us. But now you must wait here. The Gods will eventually come to get you. It was nice meeting you, hue-man!"
She quickly swam away, waving her hand.
I waited for a second before a fabric woven into subsections—a net—scooped me up.
"GASP! Gosh, thank you, sir!"
It took me a moment to register what was happening.
My body had completely collapsed, and I couldn't move. I also realized that everything around me was much bigger than usual.
"W-Wait… What's going on?! Sir, sir! I—"
I passed a table and saw something that made my eyes widen and my mouth fall open.
"Is… Is that me?"
I saw myself sitting at the table, raising my hand as I addressed the waiter.
"Sushi Aquarium, sir!"
I looked up at the person carrying me. He was a man wearing a bandanna, and he was taking me to a back room.
***
In the back room, there was a stove, cutting boards, and everything else found in a kitchen.
It was a kitchen.
"We got an order for Sushi Aquarium! I got the fish 'ere!" the man carrying me shouted.
"W-Wait! I'm not a fish! I'm a human!"
I began flopping around as he placed me on the cutting board. I saw the gleam of a sharp knife as it came down toward me.
"I'll stop your flopping, little guy. It'll only hurt for a moment…"
"No—!"
***
The waiter walked out carrying the platter of sushi on a tray, but he didn't spot the eccentric man from before, so he sighed.
"I don't get paid enough for this…"
[ End of the Alkaline Fraiser ]