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Chapter 2 - Chapter 2: Honor Thy Father and the Loopholes

Chapter 2: Honor Thy Father and the Loopholes

Adam Stiels was starting to get the hang of this whole "new body, new life" thing. The first few days had been… an adventure. He'd learned a lot about his new body, namely that it had a surprisingly good poker face but a terrible diet of instant noodles and cold pizza. He'd also spent a considerable amount of time trying to "turn off" the mental screen of the System, which he'd decided to call "Guido" because it sounded like a friendly, slightly-too-intense Italian guy. Guido, the system, was not amused.

"Seriously, Guido, you can't have a name? Or a personality? Just a disembodied voice that gives me missions? That's so impersonal. It's like being tutored by a particularly aggressive Alexa. Can you at least give me a little flair? A catchphrase? Something? 'It's a me, Guido, and you have a mission!' Maybe? No? Okay, fine. Be a boring system. I'm not judging. Much."

The current mission, as Guido had so eloquently put it, was to "aid the hero" in the case of Martin Somers. Adam knew the story. Oliver was going after Somers, a corrupt corporate type on his father's list, and his actions would eventually lead to John Diggle getting hired as his bodyguard. Adam, being a man of culture and meta-knowledge, knew the importance of Diggle. The man was a moral compass, a strategist, and a walking, talking dose of reality. Getting on his good side was a priority.

He spent the next few days playing the part of a diligent private investigator. He wasn't really investigating, of course. He was using his meta-knowledge to track Oliver's movements, always staying one or two steps behind him, a human version of a really enthusiastic stalker. His new D-Rank Attack Gu, which he'd nicknamed 'Punchy,' was still just a buzzing sensation in his stomach, but he could feel its potential. He hadn't used it yet. He didn't want to just start punching random thugs. He was a sarcastic PI, not a street brawler. Yet.

The day came when Oliver was going to confront Martin Somers. Adam found himself a cozy little spot across the street, a small coffee shop with a surprisingly decent latte. He watched through the window as Oliver, in his 'Hood' attire, scaled a building across the way. He saw Oliver's bow, his intense stare, and the unmistakable silhouette of a man who had clearly just finished a five-year-long yoga retreat from hell.

"Alright, there he is. The Hood. God, the pointy hood and the leather. He's going for the whole 'I'm a symbol of justice' thing, and I'm just sitting here, drinking a latte. I'm like the passive-aggressive sidekick he doesn't know he has. What's my supervillain name? 'Latte Lord'? 'The Caffeine Crusader'? I'll work on it."

Guido's mental screen flickered to life.

[Mission: Aid the Hero in his pursuit of Martin Somers. Reward: Gu and Coins.]

Adam sighed, putting down his latte. "Alright, Guido, what's my plan? Do I throw a Batarang? Do I scream a cheesy one-liner? Do I, God forbid, engage in hand-to-hand combat?"

The system didn't respond, which was, as Adam was quickly learning, its default setting. It just gave him the mission and left him to his own devices.

He watched as Oliver engaged Somers' thugs. Oliver was good, brutally efficient, but he was also a lone wolf, and the sheer number of thugs was starting to overwhelm him. Adam knew he had to do something. But what? Running over there and yelling "I'm a fan!" probably wouldn't help. He needed a distraction. A big, noisy, utterly chaotic distraction.

His eyes scanned the street. A row of parked cars. A small, but very loud, air horn he'd seen in a novelty shop window earlier that day. A mischievous grin spread across his face.

"Okay, Guido, this is my big hero moment. Don't judge. Or do. I don't care. It's gonna be hilarious."

He pulled a small device out of his pocket—a universal car alarm remote he'd bought online because, hey, you never know when you need to cause some chaos. He aimed it at a nearby red sedan and pressed the button.

A loud, piercing WHEEP-WHEEP-WHEEP filled the air.

The thugs, momentarily distracted, looked over at the source of the noise. It was all the opening Oliver needed. He took down two of them with a few swift moves. The rest of the thugs, still confused, were easy pickings.

Adam didn't wait for the credits. He casually walked away from the scene, his air horn clutched in his hand. He wasn't a hero, but he was a damn good instigator.

"You're welcome, emo Batman," he muttered under his breath, a satisfied smirk on his face.

[Mission Complete. Hero Aided.]

[Reward: F-Rank Speed Gu and 10 Coins.]

[Gu Acquired: F-Rank Speed Gu.]

[Coins Acquired: 10.]

He felt a new, faint buzzing sensation in his legs. The Speed Gu, he presumed. It wasn't a sudden burst of super speed, just a subtle feeling of lightness, as if his steps were a little faster, his movements a little more fluid. He tested it out by jogging back to his apartment, the feeling of the new Gu making him feel like he was floating just a few inches above the ground.

"An F-rank Gu. So, the budget option. It's like the free trial version of the Flash's powers. I'm not running across cities, but maybe I can finally outrun a pigeon. A noble goal, indeed. This is all starting to feel a little too real now. I'm a guy with a sassy system and a bug that makes me slightly less slow. This is the origin story of… someone who's probably going to die in a hilariously anticlimactic way, isn't it?"

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