The reunion nobody planned, chaos everywhere, and Evan's accidental fame — now with maximum dad jokes and dark humor. Prepare your stomach for laughter and existential dread.
Scene: A shadowy dock at midnight.Kodi crawls out of the vent like a man who just survived a dumpster fire but somehow smells like a fine whiskey. He brushes off what might be rat fur or regret.
Waiting nervously is NUKE — looking like a tech-savvy teenager who just hacked his curfew and got away with it.
Kodi, smirking:
"Well, well, if it isn't my favorite rebellious kid. You here to bail me out or just remind me I'm the reason they invented gray hair?"
NUKE, twirling a flash drive like it's the remote to world domination:
"Both. Also, your meme game's so old it's in a museum now. Time to upgrade, grandpa."
Kodi rolls his eyes dramatically:
"I'm not old. I'm vintage. Like your Wi-Fi signal—spotty but still kinda charming."
Suddenly, his phone BUZZES.
Cut to: Evan Tumbles, sitting in a shoebox apartment that's one Netflix documentary away from a crime scene.He stares at his phone, eyes wide. On the screen:
WANTED: EVAN TUMBLESBounty: $2,000,000For "Unauthorized Cyber Shenanigans" and "Helping Kodi Grey Make Bad Decisions."
Evan groans, tossing the phone on a pile of overdue bills and empty ramen cups.
"Great. I'm wanted for aiding and abetting my boss's midlife crisis."
Back to Kodi, reading Evan's bounty with a slow, evil grin.
Kodi:
"Evan, that's adorable. My bounty? Three trillion. Basically, I'm the reason the global economy's on life support."
NUKE laughs, nearly choking on his own smugness.
"Dad, you're like a walking economic stimulus package."
Kodi, wiping away a fake tear:
"I'm not crying. It's just the price of greatness. Or maybe the expired ramen."
NUKE holds up the flash drive like a trophy.
NUKE:
"Got the last piece to control Eden. Ready to go full-on villain?"
Kodi:
"Nah, I'm over world domination. Let's just troll the Rothschilds until they start therapy."
They fist bump — hard enough to make the security cams tilt.
Kodi:
"Oh, Evan? Tell your fans to clear their browser history. It's gonna get messier than my ex's texts."
Evan (texting):
"Already on it. Also thinking of legally changing my name to 'Definitely Not Evan Tumbles' and moving to a cabin with no Wi-Fi."
Suddenly, a rat wearing tiny sunglasses scurries past, carrying a USB stick.
Kodi points:
"Look, Evan. Even the rodents are undercover now."
Evan sighs:
"Great. Now I'm paranoid and lactose intolerant. Thanks, life."
Kodi laughs:
"Welcome back to the family, kid. We're all just glitches in the system."
Final line:"Remember: When the world locks you up, make sure you've got a rebellious kid, a sarcastic assistant with an identity crisis, and memes so deadly they could start a war.