Chapter 4 - Chapter 3. Organizational issues.

Chapter 3. Organizational issues.

 "No man is irreplaceable!" - Woodrow Wilson, 1912

 "Personnel decides everything!" – I.V. Stalin, 1935

 We returned home somewhere around dawn, slightly tipsy, tired and plump. I reached the bed solely on autopilot, somehow threw off my shoes and outerwear, after which I landed in the position "face in the pillow". I did not feel the landing of the second body next to me, falling asleep.

 And unlike the previous one, the new morning was very pleasant. It was good to wake up feeling like a pretty girl's head was on your shoulder, and her leg was thrown over you in a proprietary manner. Again, I experienced a very strange mixture of feelings, on the one hand, the fact that we were clothed and there was definitely nothing between us was good, but I would be lying if I said that I was not upset at all.

 – (–_–) Zzz… – Neo yawned and stretched. Then her gaze fell on me. On the hugging me. – (O_o)… – loading process… – (O_O)…

 "Good morning," I nod cautiously.

 – (O_O)…

 - What?

 – (O_0)… (0_0)… (o_o)… (–_–»)… – we lie silently. Neopolitan gradually turns red.

 "Hmm... I'll go make breakfast..." In order to somehow break the awkward silence, I voiced the first thought that came to mind.

 - (q‸q)?.. - twitch, they looked at me pitifully.

 - Eh... - I hug her and gently kiss the girl on the tip of her lips. - But then don't say that I didn't warn you!

 - (^____^)!!! - Well, well, what am I supposed to do with this?! Okay, they already had a very strange relationship, now it will be even stranger and more wonderful.

 - But breakfast is still on! - leaving the girl to lie around a bit longer, I quickly freshened up under the shower... a cold shower, after all, a night in the arms of a beautiful girl is for a young and healthy male body... Ahem, in general, getting out of bed and stomping to wash up under Neo's gaze was very awkward for me. Especially considering that she looks at her favorite ice cream in about the same way.

 The main course today was an omelette with tomatoes and fish fillet, despite the strange combination that made something itch in my brain, it tasted and looked pretty good. And so, having stuffed myself to my heart's content, I wondered what to do next? For the next couple of days, everyone left us alone, but that didn't mean we could chill.

 Basically, I had a couple of days of free time, a good supply of ashes and a "fueled" workbench, which is also a 3D printer. But it differed from those in my world like a Ferrari from a Zaporozhets. Civilian representatives of these devices in my world could only print any plastic with silicone, and even then - slowly and sadly. "Industrial" ones were capable of a little more - they can handle steel. Powder and low-temperature processing. That is, the parts such a "miracle" gave out were "disposable". It seems that there were projects for improvement and development, but I can't say here - it's not really my thing, so I didn't follow it much. But the local Workbenches resembled those from Far-Far Away. The use of Dust in them allowed for high-temperature smelting, welding, hardening, tempering, alloying, cementing... in short, this pedestal the size of two work tables replaced a full-cycle metallurgical plant, a chemical laboratory, a forge... hell, it even made coffee! And at the same time, the locals in physics have not advanced beyond classical mechanics, the basics of thermodynamics and Ohm's laws! But they build humanoid robots, and I even saw them out of the corner of my eye in one of the seasons of OBChR! With a fucking Force Field! And the locals can't even understand the principles of Superposition! How they got to the laser without the concepts of defraction and interference, I also don't know. Or rather, I know, but the answer kills me. Dust. This literally magical substance solved all the problems. Should the joints, especially the legs, of robots wear out quickly under such loads and speeds? No problem, add a couple of grains of "Earth Dust" to the metal - and you can safely put such a concept as "metal fatigue" to shame. What, you say? A problem with an autonomous energy source? A battery with finely dispersed Electric Dust the size of a fist contains energy comparable to what a small thermal power plant can generate in a day. Flights? Forget about aerodynamics, why do you need it if a pinch of Gravity Dust can make an iron fly? And if you bother a little, it will also envelop it in an impenetrable force field! Did they chop off your arm? Yes, it is unpleasant, but we have excellent prostheses that can perfectly transmit even fine motor skills and have a feedback! True, you must have an open Aura to connect a spare part alloyed with some kind of cunning medical dust to your body, but you will use it no worse than your previous, meaty arm! And so it is in everything. In terms of technical development, Remnant was ahead of my home world by at least fifty years, yes, not in all aspects, but in most. At the same time, both the raw material base and "classical" physics were somewhere at the level of the early nineteenth century.

 And then this wonderful time traveler with a good, I hope, baggage of knowledge appeared. And, the most pleasant thing, having the ability to embody this knowledge in metal. So, what can Cinder present to me? Most likely, introduce me to the unforgettable Adam Taurus and his menagerie. Taurus is a problem, as far as I remember, his Semblance is a complete absorption of any energy directed towards him, with the subsequent release of a charge for an attack. Should he release everything at once or can somehow dose the force of the blow, I can't say - I didn't watch the series that closely, but the very fact that you can't even blow him up or shoot him in the back with something large-caliber, personally upset me a lot. I didn't like the idea of ​​killing anyone at all ... well ... except Cinder, and even then I'm not sure I could kill her, even if such an opportunity presented itself. But it's unlikely that things will turn out differently in this world, so it's better to immediately prepare yourself for the thought that I won't be clean... and, what's strangest, I don't tremble in horror from this realization.

 Perhaps it was Torchwick's memory that he had never been a good uncle, perhaps the fact that most people from my world were taught from the cradle that if you do badly, then "There" you will have to answer badly for it, and this holds many back, no matter what they believe, but the thought "what if it really is?" flashes every now and then. The possible inevitability of punishment and the touch of civilization plus the threat of punishment "here and now" from the state, taken together - these are very good deterrents. But I had one "tiny" problem. I had already been "There" and had a conversation with a knowledgeable being, albeit a short one, and this moment generally passed somehow on the side, in passing, but it was enough. The subconscious fear of inevitable punishment disappeared. Well, as practice has shown, the veneer of civilization is scraped off unusually quickly - a couple of bullets over my head, and here I am, passionately kissing and not averse to having some fun with a girl, about a relationship with whom just a day ago I thought that using her feelings for the previous owner of the body would be very unethical. It didn't take me long to reconsider my morals. Well, and I knew perfectly well about avoiding "state punishment" and "everyone is equal before the law, but some are more equal" before the hit, and Roman could write a five-volume work of instructive examples. How not to go crazy from imaginary permissiveness. Especially with such a Manifestation. But the rule that for every cunning ass there is always a bolt with a special thread still works everywhere and always. And that means you shouldn't go too far, especially if you only have Torchwick's skills, but not the ability to use them.

 Okay, enough of this self-digging, my thoughts have gone completely in the wrong direction, I started with the Workbench and ended with something approaching the classic "am I a trembling creature or do I have the right". No need for that, let's get back to our sheep, pardon me, bulls. The red ones, the mad ones. And with a crowd of equally crazy terrorists. So, you can't just shoot Adam. In close combat... ahem, well, the original Torchwick might have had a chance... small and with the use of dirty tricks, or better yet, support. He'll cut down the current me in about five seconds. And I'm flattering myself. What should I do? Don't offer the "nothing" option, he's a fucking terrorist with a leaky roof, ready to happily cut down anyone who is not a faunus. Well, and those who are a faunus but don't share his point of view - too. Okay, direct methods of influence are ineffective, but what about indirect ones? The locals, of course, came up with the concept of flashbang grenades, as well as smoke bombs, but it was all very unconvincing. But fauns have much sharper hearing and vision, including at night. Smell, by the way, too. So let's start with non-lethal "toys". Unfortunately, there was no butyric acid on Remnant, somehow it was of no use in the Ash-oriented technology, but... what schoolchild from our world does not know how to make a smoke bomb or stink bomb using improvised methods, at least in theory? There are dozens of recipes. I decided to use the one that involves egg whites, a little sodium and water. Mix, but do not shake, and also leave for a couple of days, preferably in a transparent bottle in the sun for the greatest effect. After thinking for a bit, I added a local "flavor enhancer", no idea what it's made of, but it seems to be a natural product, and printing the necessary glass flask for this "folk tool" on a local workbench was a matter of seconds. We'll pour it in and check what I've got in a couple of days.

 It would also be nice to make flashbang grenades, oddly enough, there was nothing special about them either - a bit of magnesium and ammonium nitrate. The first was in the consumables of the "printer" itself, the second was freely sold as fertilizer. It's just that no idiot ever tried to mix them and set them on fire. Why, when there is Dust? I was not sure about the ratio of substances, but here it was possible to experiment.

 - Um, Neo, can I ask you for a small favor?

 – (–_о)? – my faithful servant sat next to me and watched my strange experiments, not forgetting to eat ice cream, of course.

 "I need you to go to a store that sells fertilizers and get some phosphorus-based ones," I thought for a bit and convinced myself that life happens in different ways, and then continued "making an order." "I also need a couple dozen mice and four sets of gas masks, as well as thick rubberized clothing that covers all parts of the body, medical alcohol, and some kind of acid, at least the same as the one used for soldering electronics."

 - (O_o)?

 - No, I haven't gone crazy, I just had one very, very, very bad idea that I still have to implement.

 The girl nodded and disappeared. I thought again, am I overdoing it? If this thing falls into the hands of that same Cinder, it will be a disaster, and if society finds out who gave it to her, I'd be better off shooting myself right away.

 What did I plan? To prepare arguments in case things go VERY badly. Once in my life there was a relatively short period of courtship with a girl from the chemistry department, and sometimes gatherings in the company of mutual friends and acquaintances, future engineers communicated with future luminaries of the chemical industry. And, of course, at a men's meeting, in addition to girls and politics, another invariable aspect of male interest is discussed. Weapons. And when chemists and weapons are in the same sentence ... correction, tipsy chemists. That's how I learned that one of the most lethal types of military toxic substances was once completely accidentally invented during an attempt to develop a new type of pesticide. And it can be made in general in an elementary way from any phosphorus fertilizer, alcohol and acid, preferably nitric, but not essential. In general, chemists are scary people, no joke.

 Neo returned an hour and a half later with everything she needed. By that time, I had already finished "unsealing" the peculiar greenhouse. More precisely, a sealed plastic box with a completely independent ventilation system. Then more serious work began, I decided to start with something simpler, however, and began making small "testers" from a mixture of magnesium and ammonium - I was able to extract it from the fertilizers without any problems, the "cleaning" function was quite basic for the Workbench. Of course, it could not extract anything from anything, but it was quite sufficient for my needs.

 And now, five hours later...

 - Aaaah, your moooooot! - I worked, of course, in the "welder's glasses" made right there, and the "doses" I made were almost homeopathic, but still it was pretty close to the eyes, and the idea of adding a little high-quality Fire Dust to the mixture turned out to be... brilliant... damn it. Having somehow blinked and wiped away the tears that had appeared, and also thanked the Dragons and Neo's love of ice cream that the girl at that moment was in the kitchen helping herself to another portion and did not admire the flash, I looked at what was left of the test stand. A piece of sintered iron, which had recently been a good steel plate, hinted that if you don't use this thing as a flash grenade, you can always use it as a thermobaric munition. So that's what you are, a melta bomb. Of course, Neo immediately came running to the noise.

 - (O_o)??? - a look at the stunned me, at the burnt steel, again at me, then at the workbench thermometer hanging at 3345 degrees, - (O_O)''.

 - So... - I look from the girl to the "thermometer", - first, I'm fine. Second, you didn't see anything. The thermometer just glitched.

 - (=_=)… - Neo nodded, but her gaze was prosecutorial, I think, if it weren't for my pitiful appearance, and after meeting such an outburst it couldn't have been any other way, they would have given me a thorough interrogation. Silent and stern.

 At this point we had a discussion and I decided to take a lunch break, I didn't want to do the second part of the planned "inventions", and first I needed to replace the damaged workbench module, even if it was just a coating, but still. In general, that's enough for today, I have something to surprise an enemy with even normal vision, and such a flash can generally cripple a faun, or put him out of action for a month, even taking into account the miraculous properties of Aura.

 We didn't bother with lunch and just ordered pizza... and ice cream, yes. I'm becoming more and more convinced that if it weren't for Torchwick, Neo would eat only him. And at least she gets something meatier this way. That's also funny, by the way - the police can't find the evil crime boss, but the delivery guy can easily. Although okay, I'm being picky here - the order was made for my faithful servant, and she is pure and innocent before the law, like a lamb, and doesn't even have any fines for littering or illegal parking. It's good to be a ninja illusionist.

 After lunch, I made a very difficult decision - to have another training session with the cute little thing that last time so casually smashed a healthy man into concrete, yeah. I don't think that this time anything will change either, but no matter how hurt my ego is, I need to learn to use Roman's skills, with such a life I will have no end of people wanting to make a couple of extra holes in my body, and the method recommended by the respected Caiaphas Cain, unfortunately, is far from always available, so I will have to follow his doctrine completely - when you can't run away, you have to fight. The only problem was that the girl was not a stupid creature, and the question of why Roman got so drunk that he grew claws instead of hands, in which he can't hold a weapon normally, will arise. Last time it could still be attributed to the "shock" from the appearance of the Manifestation, although the owl, stretched onto the globe of such a justification, was already creaking suspiciously and bulging its eyes. This time, let's say, I can make excuses for the aftereffects of blindness, I can even claim a slight concussion. But what can I come up with as an excuse for constant screw-ups? Or will it not happen after all? No, you can hope for the best, but prepare only for the worst. Hmm-m-m... As an option, change the weapon, there is a reason - with such a Manifestation, fate itself destined me to carry a wagon of highly specialized equipment for all occasions and a couple of universal arguments on top, but the "medicine" will be worse than the "disease", Roman honed his skills in using a cane-club for more than a decade, at first because he could not afford anything more lethal than a stick, then he simply got used to it. He was also quite good with a sword, as one of the most common and versatile types of melee weapons. It was the easiest to find a normal mentor for it, and some techniques could be transferred to his favorite cane. Ahem, in general, if I changed my weapon, not only would I lose the support of ten years of training, practice and just plain fistfights, but I would also get all of this playing against me - the body still had reflexes. But just modernize it, and some "awkwardness" at first would be quite understandable. Well, that already looks like a plan. In addition ... yes ... my Aura reserves are now at least twice as large as Torchwick's, and he was already a strong guy, but along with the Aura, the passive enhancement granted by it also increased. It is clear that it is not symmetrical, but still. In general, even a banal fill of the cane with lead will bring me a lot of profit.

 Sighing, I quickly entered the necessary parameters on the Workbench, I won't upgrade the old one yet, but making a one-piece bent steel stick for training was a matter of minutes, I only had time to smoke one cigar. That's it, I've never used a steam locomotive before, but now my hands reach out, but let it be so. The tobacco tasted quite pleasant, and it didn't cause any harm to the body — Aura fights weak poisons perfectly. It's not enough for anything serious, but it completely neutralizes the harm from tobacco, from alcohol — almost completely, in order to get at least moderately drunk, before Roman had to drink a bottle of whiskey in one go, now I… well, I think, somewhere around a bucket… well, maybe not a bucket, but somehow I doubt that I can physically fit that much.

 Having received the still hot weapon, I weighed it in my hand. It felt like only a kilogram or a little more. A little heavier than the previous cane. Only the 3D printer terminal showed that 14.7 kilograms of steel were used for this Shaft. Well, I still can't fully comprehend what kind of monsters the presence of Aura turns people into, although it would seem that an example of a girl who weighs at most forty-five kilograms, easily waving a combat scythe twice as big as it is and weighing at least a couple of pounds, was just before my eyes. Oh, and by the way, the locals also have a special relationship with inertia… Having twirled the club a bit and convinced myself that my skills and reflexes were still with me and allowed me to twirl this thing better than any mill, I went to ask for another beating. Of course, I could have tried it quietly myself, but the problem was that I didn't need to hone the techniques, my body already performed them cleanly and naturally, I needed to learn how to use them correctly, and here I needed a live opponent.

 - Neo, do you want to stretch a bit? - I looked into the kitchen nook, where the girl was currently furiously shoving a crumpled pizza box into the trash can. To push the unsqueezable, because she was too lazy to take out the trash, brought tears of nostalgia to my eyes!

 – (n_n)! – the girl was all for it and quickly darted for her combat umbrella.

 "Excellent," I walked towards the empty hangar, loudly clicking my new cane on the floor.

 – (–_-)', – my "new thing" clearly made the girl think about the eternal.

 - What? Considering my Manifestation, it makes sense to think about separating firearms and bladed weapons.

 – (>_>)…

 - Well, yes, it will deprive me of a couple of feints, but how many new prospects! Oh well, enough chatter, Neo! Time to act!

 - (-_-)… - the girl demonstratively pouted, well, who else could accuse her of excessive chatter, except Roman? That's it! However, I didn't fall for her pouty look, and on reflexes alone I put the cane behind my back.

 *Clang!* - the collision with the combat umbrella was successful, and the image of the pouting lady shattered into pieces.

 - What a meanness! My school! - the baton met the umbrella again and again. It's strange, this time there is no longer that jitters, moreover, I feel how I am starting to like it! This pleasant lightness, courage and desire to blurt out something like that. Yesterday's sophisticated suicide attempt, disguised as a robbery of a store with Ashes, gave me a good thrashing, adding Roman's features and filling my life with new bright colors.

 - (^_^), - Neo smiled happily, continuing to dance around me.

 - And if so? - a sharp step forward, combined with a blow from below upwards, gone! Relax your hand a little, and the baton slides down by itself, now I hold it by the tip, and the hook already reflects the girl's counterattack - even though my maneuver failed, but yesterday after a similar attack I was already being wiped off the dust. Now - a new clang. Turn, connect the second hand and hit with all my might, like a golf club.

 – (*‸*)! – How could you curse silently, I didn't know, but the girl managed to do it, her whole appearance said it. Well, yes, it's one thing to take a light polymer cane on an open umbrella-shield, even if it's reinforced with Aura, but to get hit by a cast steel shaft… reinforced with a more powerful Aura – that's unpleasant. The poor thing was even thrown back a little, and… my body worked almost by itself. The cane is sent to the ground at an angle, the impulse of Aura… now the charge will go off, and someone's face will get acquainted with the accelerated stick, and then pick up the ricocheting weapon and finish it off… and then it dawns on me that the weapon doesn't have the usual Dust charge. It stupidly clanks on the floor.

 "F…" I didn't have time to finish, because my face became acquainted with an elegant foot in a boot.

 I officially declare: a boot to the head is unpleasant! And also to the neck, chest, then a footstool followed, and... the world froze for a moment, my body packed itself into a spatial pocket, and then unpacked again behind the back of the odd-eyed asshole. Grab my leg, tug... a woman's body with truly snake-like grace somehow wrapped itself around my arm, torso, another moment - and now I'm somehow flying upwards, at least the ceilings here are high... Packing-unpacking again, and... my fist shatters the illusion, while the back of my head gets acquainted with the hook of Neo's umbrella. An attempt to kick only led to me losing my balance, since at that moment my leg was intercepted, and the supporting leg was hooked by its own hook. And then they almost slammed a sharp heel into the most precious thing, and at that moment, while I was flying face down on the floor. I managed to get out of it only on the instincts of my body and a very strong reluctance to get it. Another "teleport", and... an umbrella sting flies into my stomach, and they hit me in the face with a hook - I miscalculated, a small nasty thing! While I was thinking, they had already hit me under the knee, once more in the face and knocked me down on the floor. After which they sat on top with a regal look.

 - You know... you could have given me the chance to pick up the cane again, - I rolled my eyes philosophically and took the Scroll out of my pocket. It showed that my Aura had just barely fallen into the yellow zone. After such a beating - an excellent indicator.

 – (-_-v)???

 - No, I remember that if the enemy made such a mistake, then he himself is an evil Grimm, but I could have shown leniency to my beloved boss! - Yeah, I was beaten by a fragile girl again, but this time for some reason I wanted to laugh, and not frantically think where to run and where to hide better. Damn, I'm even starting to like it! This power, sensations and almost invulnerability! Who would refuse something like that? And I understand in my mind that these are all very bad signs, but I can't do anything about it, I hope this intoxication will pass, or at least it will be possible to control it better.

 – (>_>)… – Neopolitan pretended to think seriously, but it didn't last long, – (~_~)!.. – grinning mischievously and closing her eyes contentedly, she just shook her head.

 - Okay, okay, I'll learn a lesson... but... hmm... No. It doesn't matter...

 – (v_v), – "Suspicious!" – her whole pose screamed, the girl even leaned lower, squinting at my satisfied mug. I couldn't help but take advantage of the moment, especially when a flushed and slightly disheveled devilishly beautiful lady is sitting on you… In short, it was "grab", a sideways flip, and now I'm hanging over her.

 - Gotcha? - And why am I suddenly smiling from ear to ear?

 - (^_^), - Neo pointed somewhere down with her eyes. I carefully glance down and see an umbrella with its tip already extended, which is now almost touching my pants.

 "An argument," I am forced to admit. "So it's a draw?"

 – (~_^)»… – a negative shake of the head.

 - What if I persuade you a little? - I lean closer and whisper the question in his ear, Neo smiles and gently runs his left hand over my cheek.

 Nod.

 It was impossible to resist here, and we continued other "trainings" that we had enjoyed so much yesterday. However, like yesterday, we did not go further - now was clearly not the time, and not the place. In addition, such success in swinging iron gave me another thought, which looked quite relevant in the context of upcoming events. And, perhaps, this evening was ideal for its implementation, all that was left was to conduct a small investigation...

 Evening of the same day. Hotel.

 - Enough already! How much more?! - Yang finally gave in, looking at her sister.

 "Mmm-mm-mm…" a dark-haired head with reddish strands towards the end drawled sadly from the depths of the ottoman on the sofa.

 - No "M"! Nothing like that happened! How much longer can we suffer?

 - No-no-no! - they squealed desperately from the furniture, kicking their legs in denial. - You don't understand, Yang! - Ruby raised her head and stared at her older sister with an expression of world tragedy on her face. - I suspected Principal Ozpin of being on the side of Evil because he brought me cookies, and I also blurted out about it... And I blurted out about his infatuation with innocent girls! - Tears appeared in the corners of silver eyes for the umpteenth time that day, only not from sadness at all, but rather from panicked shame. - What will dad say?! Principal Ozpin almost choked on his coffee! What if he had choked?! I almost killed Principal Ozpin!

 "Calm down, calm down," calling on all the acting skills she had acquired over the years of caring for her younger sister, the blonde raised her palms in a protective gesture and tried to put on an appropriate smile for the occasion. "Nothing happened, and you were even accepted into Beacon! You made a good impression! Don't be dramatic!"

 "What if they only took me because I almost killed Headmaster Ozpin?!" Rose squeaked, reaching a new level of panic, or rather, going into another circle. "He's a war hero, a great Hunter, and I almost made him choke! Why does this always happen to me?!"

 "You need to learn to take it easier..." Yang grumbled and, raising her voice, continued: "You shouldn't retreat into your shell after every failure in communicating with people! That way you'll never learn to communicate with anyone!"

 - And I ate all the cookies he brought, - the girl continued to drive herself into the depths of despair, not listening to her sister. - He just cleared his throat, and I already ate everything... What... What did they think of me?! Wow-a-a-a!!! - the brunette's face noisily plopped back into the ottoman.

 "Chop-a-a-a…" Yang moaned with the same multifaceted suffering that is inherent in older relatives in relation to the antics of younger ones. And then suddenly a crash was heard from the bedroom, and an unfamiliar voice began to loudly complain:

 - Who ties flowers by the handles by the window?! And with a special hunting line with a transparency of 0.23! Sadists! It will squeeze all the currents for the flower! They couldn't find a normal rope?! Ugh, to be like that! And also a dynasty of Hunters! Shame! Huh?.. - the unknown shouter suddenly fell silent, as if listening to something. - Oh yeah... - clearing his throat, he continued more calmly. - Hoodie, don't be scared, I'm with cookies!

 - Wee-e-e-e!!! - the girl, who had just completely fallen apart, soared almost to the ceiling at the last words. - It's HIM!

 Yang didn't ask again or clarify, instead the click of the dust charges in the bracers being raised into combat position echoed throughout the living room.

 - Oh, let's not talk dirty, - the same voice suddenly rang out from behind the blonde, forcing her to jump up to the ceiling in surprise. A turn in the air, a hand thrown out in a lunge, Aura squeezes the trigger... Here Yang realized that she no longer had the bracers on, - you don't want to pay for the destruction of the room and ruin the evening of all those charming people who also rent rooms in this establishment, do you? - as if nothing had happened, twirling the combat gloves already tied with a string on his cane, the tall guy in the white jacket spoke, looking at the sisters with a charming smile.

 - You... - Ruby pointed her finger at the intruder. - You are that robber! What are you doing here?

 - Oh! Of course, I'm going to feed you sweets until you're completely amazed! - this fop answered impudently and, having finished playing with his gloves, raised his other hand, where he found himself clutching a bag stuffed with something. - I need data to predict the costs of our future relationship! By the way, Hoodie, would you introduce me to your sister?

 "I don't even know you!" the girl in the red raincoat squeaked indignantly, even forgetting about her own weapon from the surrealism of what was happening.

 - What other "future relationship", old man? - Yang was used to hitting first and asking questions later, but the fact that the uninvited guest, firstly, somehow managed to remove the already cocked Ember Silica from her hands in a split second, and secondly...

 The girl had a vague idea of what the second thing was, but the intuition she had grown accustomed to trusting behaved in much the same way as when she met that alcoholic Crow - it literally screamed that there was someone very dangerous in front of her, even if he looked like a complete idiot. And that someone was standing next to her sister. All of this together did what even the notorious Crow had not always managed to do on the first try - Yang Xiao Long stopped.

 - You hurt my heart, Dragon! - the guest clasped his hands pathetically. - Of course, my life was full of hardships and a variety of vices, but I am still far from Old Man Ozpin even in the field of banal immorality, not to mention age! - the man who had just openly grimaced suddenly appeared right next to Yang's ear and before she had time to back away (and she did so with all the agility and efficiency she could!), he conspiratorially "whispered" to the whole room: - And by the way, I'm not much older than you!

 - Ee-e-e!!! - came the sound belatedly, with which the girl recoiled.

 "It's the hat and the cane, I'm telling you," the red-haired psycho continued, leaning on the cane as if nothing had happened. "As a kid, I had to find ways to look more respectable to get a job, and then it became part of my style. But you're right - they make me look older," the man glanced critically at his jacket. "Do you think I should change the color?"

 - Don't give me the runaround! What kind of "relationship" is that? - the blonde couldn't shake the feeling that they were being played with in the best Crowe style, but despite all her love for her uncle, relaxing and taking her eyes off the man who stole her Amber... Wait a minute. Where are the gauntlets? He was just twirling them on his cane!

 - Don't be jealous, Dragon, I see your little sister only as a source of Cuteness and Positivity. At least for the next couple of years... Well, you know, these villains... - the guest shrugged his shoulders vaguely. - Our hearts just melt at the sight of cute positive girls in sinister scarlet dresses who are capable of organizing a real massacre... And even with such a charm as a huge combat scythe with a built-in machine gun! - the man closed his eyes dreamily.

 - A-a-a-a-ah, - Ruby, whose face matched the color of her cloak, hid the said face in her palms, - s-stop! A-a-a-a-a... And why "little dragon"?

 - She's flaming, proud, furious, and sharp, like a Grimm Dragon, - the guest began listing Yang's "merits" as if nothing had happened. The blonde had heard most of them from her father. - But she hasn't matured into an adult dragon yet, and therefore she's a "little dragon". Luckily, she has someone to take after...

 "Grimm Dragon?" Ruby's breath caught. "Do they even exist?"

 - There are others like that, Hoodie.

 - Why do you call me "Hood"? I-it's... embarrassing... My name is Ruby. Ruby Rose!

 - That's exactly why I call you that, Hoodie. Roman Torchwick! A man who sincerely wishes everyone well and well! At your service, - the red-haired young man took off his hat and made a slight bow.

 - And how does this relate to the robbery of the store with Ashes?

 - What, don't you know? The dentist wants you to have a toothache, the policeman wants something bad to happen to you, because helping you is their job, for which they get paid, and they're good... damn dentists. Ahem, so what was I talking about? Oh, yeah, everyone wants to hurt you, and only the thief sincerely wishes your home wealth and prosperity!

 - Um... - Ruby hung slightly, turning helplessly to her sister. To meet the exact same look. - So... you admit that you are a criminal? - the girl asked, unable to think of anything smarter.

 - Let me think... - Torchwick actually thought about it, or at least pretended to. The sisters no longer knew what to think or what to base their feelings on. - Yes! Definitely yes! - the man finally said with obvious pride. - Let's be friends! - a new crazy proposal followed without the slightest pause.

 - But... I can't be friends with a criminal! - squeaked a panicked Ruby, whose long-standing dream of finding at least someone she could call a friend (other than her sister) and the rest of her worldview, brought up on the ideas that people should be helped and villains should be fought, entered into a hard clinch in her head. The effect would probably not have been so strong, but it turned out that this was the first time in her life that she had been offered friendship, and she was completely unprepared mentally for such a turn of events.

 "I don't know anything!" Roman dismissively dismissed the objections. "A girl who has assembled such a chic battle scythe can't just not be my friend!"

 "But!.." Ruby tried to object.

 - Well, yes, I'm a bandit, a villain, and generally a redhead, - the guest nodded with a dose of self-criticism. - So what? Yes, you, as the Huntress, will probably have to catch me, but that will only add interest! And anyway, I brought cake and cookies! Are you saying that you're such a bad girl that you'll throw out a man who came to congratulate you on your first baptism of fire and admission to Beacon just because of his profession? Don't you even consider fauns to be people?

 - Me?! No-no-no! I'll never! Yang, tell him! - Rose, horrified to the depths of her soul, hung on her sister's arm, staring at her with the most pleading look she could muster, and even a little more.

 - Yes! - Torchwick announced triumphantly, not giving the blonde a chance to get a word in. - I knew you were a gem! Now, let's begin celebrating your baptism of fire! - The bulky bag landed heavily on the table in front of the sofa. - By the way, did I mention? You're the first person to foil my heist! I knew it was fate!

 - A?

 "Give Amber to Silica!" Yang couldn't resist, while trying to throw off her younger sister, who had clung to her forearm with a death grip.

 - Here you go, - the combat gauntlets appeared in the guest's hands again as if by magic. The girl did not have time to notice where and when he had managed to get them. - I hope you don't want to use them on me the same way you did in poor Junior's bar. He's still suffering, - Yang took the gloves back, sat down on the chair, having first turned it with its back to Torchwick, and leaned on the said back.

 - I'll... uh... go get some water! - Ruby ran out of the room.

 "So, you're running errands for Junior?" the blonde narrowed her eyes, trying to find some rational explanation for the madness that was happening.

 - Ahem... ha-ha, - the red-haired man laughed. - No. Junior is a good guy, of course, but I'm a little higher in the ranks of the criminal world of Vale. However, - as if separating what was said, the man raised his finger, - he told me that you were looking for someone. A certain woman...

 "Do you know something?" Yang leaned forward.

 - Perhaps, but the question of price remains. What will I get for this information?

 - Are you going to leave here on your own two feet? - a clenched fist made the back crack.

 "Little dragon," Torchwick sighed with feigned sadness, stopping smiling, "I like your assertiveness, honestly, you're a charmer, but sometimes you still need to watch your shores. You were already wrong at the bar, not by much, but wrong. And threatening a man who calmly walked into your room, disarmed you and at least has some information about you - that's just stupid.

 "What do you want?" Yang asked, gritting her teeth. "Money?"

 "No, I'm not interested in money," Torchwick smiled again.

 "Then…" the girl grimaced in contempt.

 "No, no," the guest waved his hands, "I'm not interested in any 'nights of love' with you either... No, I'm lying, I am interested, but I would prefer to seduce and corrupt you by more traditional means, and in general, we still don't know each other well enough for such proposals."

 "Well, what do you want then?" the blonde narrowed her eyes.

 – The same as from your little sister: friendship, a little faith, positivity... well, and I'll drop by periodically for a cup of tea.

 - Do you want me to be your agent in Beacon?

 - Oh, what kind of vulgarity is this? - Roman winced affectedly. - I already made it clear that I know more about Ozpin and his background than all of you put together, and why would a person who can easily walk into Beacon for a cup of tea with the students need any additional agents? Well, Dragon, you're smart, just think about it.

 "Then why?" I didn't want to believe what was said, but there was logic in it, and it made me angry.

 - Why does no one ever believe me the first time? - the man addressed the empty space to his left. - Oh yeah, - the guest was puzzled, as if he had received an answer. - But, in general, believe it or not, but everything is exactly as I said. I just like you. The way you cheerfully destroyed Junior's bar, the way Hoody fired at me with her scythe... You see, being the king of thieves is very lonely. I don't even have anyone to talk to, and interesting sisters like you are not lying around on the road, so you can consider it love at first sight.

 - And that's it?

 - Yes, I won't let you in on the rest of my insidious plans... for now, - the red-haired man chuckled, clearly deserving a couple of good blows to that very impudent red mug. - Oh, and you'll also treat me to a drink sometime. So what?

 "Tell me!" Yang decided. After all, she could rip his head off later.

 "So, the woman you're interested in is Raven Branwen, the sister of an old dusty raven, heh-heh," he clearly remembered something of his own, connected with Uncle Qrow. "The leader of a nomadic tribe of bandits, she used to be a member of Team Stark, consisting of her brother, a certain Taiyang Xiao Long, and Summer Rose…" Torchwick fell silent, and his green eyes became slyly probing.

 "Go on," Yang urged him, not wanting to bring up the topic of Ruby's origins.

 "And so it went," the guest shrugged. "I don't know exactly what happened in detail, but she had some problems with Ozpin. Although it's not surprising, anyone who thinks about Ozpin's history sooner or later starts looking at him with suspicion. Anyway, it all ended with her leaving the team. And everything would have been fine, but…"

 - But? - the girl perked up.

 - At some point in her life as a civilian, she got stuck on the basis of strength. The search for strength, personal power. Contempt for the weak, - Roman twitched his cheek, either expressing his disapproval or subtly mocking. - In the end, she abandoned her family and went back to her native bandits, to live "strong", to eat "weak". And I would really advise you not to look for her.

 "I'll figure it out myself," Yang barked.

 "Suit yourself," Torchwick shrugged. "But get stronger. From what I saw on the bar CCTV, she won't even want to talk to you right now. And I'm not kidding – at her current level, she could easily take on both your dad and your uncle at the same time. She'd probably be out of breath, but she could do it. And you, even though you've grown accustomed to thinking of them as something soft and fluffy and harmless, should understand that these two are still in the top league. Do you get the stakes now?"

 "Where can I find her?" the blonde frowned sullenly.

 - I don't know for sure, she is the official leader of the Branwen clan and hangs out with them, enjoying the "free" life outside the cities. She makes contacts herself, and if anyone has information on how to find her on their own, then only Ozpin or Qrow, but I can't ask them - not the right reputation.

 "I see…" Yang touched the back of the chair with her chin, beginning to drill into the space with a heavy gaze.

 - Well, and a small free bonus, - seeing the girl's reaction, the guest smiled sympathetically. - Her Manifestation is the creation of a spatial gap. I don't know what limitations it has, but this lady can really be elusive if she wants to.

 "Hm," Yang chuckled weakly, showing that the information had been heard.

 - A-a-a-ah, here I am! - Ruby flew into the room with a tray filled with cups, trying hard to look positive and pretend that she hadn't been eavesdropping behind the door for the last five minutes.

 - Excellent, Hoodie! You're on the right track, - obviously, Roman also knew perfectly well where Rose was "warming up the water". - By the way, while you were walking, you didn't call the police or call little Glinda, did you?

 "Mummy?" Miss Goodwitch, who had filled her with awe, was anything but "mummy." "And no, no. I didn't do anything like that!"

 "Isn't she just so cute?" the man beamed with affection. "Only such a cutie could drown old Oz when he came to recruit her as his minion, hee-hee-hee."

 - A-a-a!.. How do you know? - the girl tried to hide on level ground.

 - You're suffering very loudly, I can even hear it through the window... - Torchwick decisively opened the bag. - But let's eat the cake! - A kitchen knife appeared out of nowhere in the guy's hands, and a couple of seconds later a plate with a sweet-smelling delicacy was pushed towards Ruby. - I must find out all the details, - the visitor declared in an enveloping voice, rewarding his younger sister with an anticipatory smile.

 It was the strangest tea party the sisters had ever had. And if there hadn't been three cups and the remains of a cake and cookies left on the table after it was over, they would have thought they had dreamed it all. Well, and...

 "He stole half my ammo!" Yang roared like a beluga, blazing up and looking around with her eyes filling with crimson. "I'll kill the bastard!"

 A little later. One of the residences of the "King of Thieves".

 "Phew," I stretched out blissfully in my chair, "that was a little exhausting, but just what I needed. Neo, why didn't you ever tell me that hanging out with sweet, innocent girls is so relaxing?"

 - (O_o).

 - Oh, don't! Who stole the bullets from the Dragon because she grabbed the piece that you were already aiming at and were just waiting for the moment to cover it with an illusion? Oh, I'm scared to think what would have happened if this cake had been an ice cream cake.

 - (>_<)! - she immediately frowned and made a characteristic gesture. Yes... Neo could even start killing for an ice cream.

 - But you have to admit, we haven't had this much fun in a long time.

 – (^_^), – a confirming nod. Half a minute to think. – (O_o)?

 - Why do I need all this, you say?.. There are several reasons, and the chance to just relax is really on this list. But their potential impresses me, no matter how you look at it, but to single-handedly scatter a crowd of men, kick the ass of the Malakait sisters and Junior himself is a good achievement for a seventeen-year-old girl, especially knowing who her mother is... in general, I want to be friends with a girl who has such great potential in the field of creating Chaos and Destruction. Well, I saw her sister in action myself - she really has very good inclinations, and her passion for cookies indicates a wonderful predisposition to the Dark Side. In general, why don't we expand and gradually make a quartet out of a duet? Or another... what an interesting figure...

 – (х_х)…

 - And don't roll your eyes! Or are you jealous?

 – (>_>)… – Neo expressed her "pfft" with her whole figure.

 - That's right. But if we're being a little more serious, - I peel myself away from the back of the chair and put my elbows on my knees, - you and I have been drawn into a game with very high stakes. This is no longer a peaceful romance for two, when there are only us, our property, stored for the time being by someone else, and the state, which almost always plays by the rules. Now we are tied to a bunch of scum and psychopaths whom we can neither replace nor send on a long route. And there are really a lot of them. But what's worse, all of them are absolutely not connected to us in any way - just a snap of the fingers of Cinder or one of the leaders of these "assistants" of hers - and everyone who was just on our side, listening to every word with their tongues stuck up their ass, will immediately shoot us in the back. We are not meat, but we are obviously expendable, Neo. As soon as we complete our task, they will get rid of us, because none of them need us in ourselves - we are strangers to them, like disposable hired punks who must perform their function, but are of no interest beyond the scope of its execution. And in this scenario, I will be calmer if someone appears who is ready to cover our backs during the climax, even if he, or rather they, themselves do not suspect it yet.

 - (O_-)…

 - Yes, for now they are, formally, on the enemy side, but that's not a problem, even a plus. Speaking of which, - I lean back, catching the girl's eye, - why did you have to steal the bullets? You're not into firearms anyway, are you?

 – (<_<)…

 - I see, it's a matter of principle and revenge for the cake. Okay, - I take out and light a cigar. - What do you plan to do while we wait for our dear representative of the subcontractor?

 – (^____^)! – the girl jumped right into my chair, unceremoniously sitting on my knees. – (^_^), (>_>)…

 - And you won't burst? - a negative shake of the head. - Okay, but what will happen to me for this? - in response, the "puppy eyes" technique. - O-o-o-okay, - I couldn't resist such an ultimate weapon. And, if you think about it, a nice tradition is starting to form. With these thoughts, I took a bowl of ice cream from my spatial stash, - but I'm still counting on a couple of spoons!

 - (^_^), - I'll bite. I just doubt I'll be able to get them...

***

 We spent the rest of the time before midnight together watching a lively action movie with Spruce Willis. There was such an actor in this world, very shaggy and unkempt, by the way, he looks a bit like Dzhigurda, only pumped up like Iron Schwartz. Chases! Shootouts! Stuntmen! And lots and lots of real use of Aura. And all this was filmed from good angles, with the right slow-mo and gorgeous special effects. Plus a wide sofa, a gorgeous girl pressed against your side, your body aching pleasantly after a stressful day, and a glass of good brandy in your hands. Here it is - happiness.

 Having finished watching the film, I kissed my beautiful maid goodnight, and that was it, we said goodbye, crawling off to our rooms. However, I was not at all surprised when the door creaked slightly at night (I had deliberately damaged the hinges so that no one could pass silently) and Neo entered my room in just a nightgown. In addition to the peignoir, she had: one pillow, one blanket, one extremely determined look. Armed with all of this, she, trying to make as little noise as possible, quietly crept up to my bed. Although I do not have the night vision of fauns, the "night light on duty" gave more than enough light. But then the question arose, what should I do? Pretend to be asleep or... Although who am I trying to fool.

 - If you came to smother me with a pillow and then wrap my body in a blanket, then I warn you, I will resist!

 – (>_<)!

 - Well, if not, then climb in, what can you do. I'll even be a gentleman and not pester you! - although the gods know, it will require monstrous efforts from me. In this pink nightgown, Neo looked extremely appetizing, even though it was thick enough not to show all the most interesting things, but, at the same time, thin enough to perfectly outline this most "interesting" thing.

 – (–_–)… – an expressive look.

 - But I somehow didn't take into account the option with "I'll start pestering you myself". B-but... you'll be gentle, right? I-I've never had anything like this happen to me before... for someone to pester me, I mean.

 – (-__-)… – a heavy sigh and rolled eyes, but I still noticed a smile at the corners of his lips.

 Reassured by her friend's usual behavior, the girl placed her pillow on the bed, fortunately the dimensions allowed it, then thought, lowered her blanket to the floor and began to take part of mine.

 - They came, usurped the territory, now they're taking away the blanket... I hope at least you don't push in your sleep? - I was nudged with a sharp elbow. - Got it, the question is withdrawn as irrelevant, - not paying attention to my grumbling, the girl settled down more comfortably, almost curling up into a ball. At that moment, she looked extremely cute and defenseless. I turn on my side and hug this miracle with one arm, slightly pressing it to myself. - Good night, Neo.

 – … – as always, silence was my answer, but from somewhere came a clear knowledge: the girl was smiling. And it was wonderful.