If the troll could talk, the first thing it would probably say is, "What the hell, man?!"
Honestly, this whole fight was a mystery. A student prefect boldly claiming he could handle such a creature? And Professor Quirrell passing out, most people actually saw that as normal…
If you asked Allen, he'd say the prefect was just full of it. Complete nonsense.
Let's rewind a bit.
After a long, exhausting day, Allen was finally about to enjoy a well-deserved dinner. Well, maybe not "well-deserved" and not really a "dinner" either, let's just say at least he could eat something.
Hogwarts was dressed up in its usual gaudy, over-the-top style for the occasion, but Allen had no appreciation for it at all. Not after carving pumpkins all afternoon. The last thing he wanted to see was more Halloween decorations.
Just as he was about to dig into his dessert, Professor Quirrell suddenly burst into the Great Hall, scarf twisted sideways over his head and panic written all over his face. Allen immediately sensed that something was off.
Sure enough, with students staring in alarm, Voldemort's puppet began his performance. Quirrell staggered to Dumbledore's side, leaned heavily on the staff table, gasping, "Troll, in the dungeons, I thought you should know…"
Then he collapsed dramatically to the floor.
Legend…
Truly, what a legend. Give that man an Oscar already!
Was acting actually a prerequisite to becoming a top-tier wizard?
No wonder that old shopkeeper slipped Allen a book he called a national treasure during a haggling match. Allen even asked if this "Stanislavski" guy was a powerful wizard. When the answer was no, he scoffed.
Now he realized… he had been too naive. How could an elder wizard, one who'd obviously lived through so much, possibly lie to him? That was wisdom from the true veterans!
Even the greatest white wizard of all time proved this theory, Dumbledore quickly calmed the chaos in the hall with a few fireworks bursting from the tip of his wand. The students were entranced, except for Allen, who was busy sneaking in another bite of pudding.
"Prefects," Dumbledore said solemnly, "lead your housemates back to your dormitories at once!"
Just as Allen had feared, the moment something serious happened, his dinner was done for.
Looks like the house-elves were going to have a busy night. Allen saw a few prefects nodding to one another. Poor elves. Then again, the Hufflepuff common room was right next to the kitchen, so they'd probably be okay.
Still, he felt like… something wasn't quite right.
Allen frowned, trying to remember what he was missing, ah, right. The troll. How was that thing dealt with again?
Wait. It wasn't defeated by the professors… it was taken down by students!
Crap! That could be a problem, he had altered too much of the original plot. What if they didn't cast the right spell?
Eyes wide, Allen quickly turned toward the duo he had in mind. He wasn't sure exactly where they'd encounter the troll, but sticking close to those two would be the safest bet.
That was when a young girl suddenly stepped into his path.
She looked familiar, though Allen couldn't recall her name.
The Slytherin girl nervously asked, "Have you seen Annie?"
Allen shook his head. To avoid causing even more trouble in Slytherin, he and Annie had sat at separate tables for dinner. So he had no clue where she'd gone.
But wait, wasn't this girl one of Annie's usual hangers-on? Even though she didn't know where Annie was?
No way…
A terrible thought struck him.
Could it be… Annie had gone after the troll herself?
Please no!
That thing looked like a troll and probably smelled even worse. Half of its danger level came from its face alone! Annie would definitely want to keep her distance from something that disgusting.
Which meant, Tibbers…
Stop! This is a school! A thousand-year-old building full of historical value!
It's one thing to tear down other houses, but if you wreck your own dorm, I can't afford to pay for the damages!
Allen's face turned from calm to flushed, from flushed to pale, then to ghost white, all in seconds under the astonished gaze of the Slytherin girl.
"We have to find her, right now!" His voice was sharp, commanding, and full of urgency, making the girl instantly recall a rumor among the students: that the boys in their year constantly ended up in the hospital wing after getting beaten up by Annie. Totally useless.
Allen, of course, had no idea that this moment was adding to his already sky-high hate meter in Slytherin. All he cared about was the fact that the "death-seeking duo" was nowhere to be seen either.
Which brought him to the experts.
"Fred. George. You guys have the map, right?"
"Of course we do," said one of the twins, "We treasure it like our own wands. Why do you ask, Allen?"
"I need to find that troll. And knock it out," Allen said plainly.
"Pfft. That stinky brute? It's annoying to fight and no fun at all. We're not interested. Here, you can have it." The twins handed him the Marauder's Map.
"Great, thanks! Later!" Allen gave a quick wave and dashed off.
Since all the students had been gathered together, the map search went quickly. Soon, he found Annie's name.
And it was…
In the girls' bathroom.
Well, this was awkward.
He was totally going to get labeled a pervert for this.
Especially with all the ghosts floating around Hogwarts!
What was he supposed to do, burst into the bathroom yelling "I'm here to save you!" like some deranged hero?
Come on…
He really was just trying to protect Hogwarts' ancient architecture, okay? Professors, please believe me…
Now he faced a terrible dilemma:
Become a pervert to save the building, or save his reputation but lose the school?
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