"You and I walk a fragile line. I have known it all this time, but I never thought I'd live to see it break." -T.S.
The knock, though soft, echoed through the quiet bathroom. My heart sped up as the doorknob slowly turned and the door started opening.
"Come in," I called, bracing myself. I kept my gaze down, letting the nerves settle in my stomach until I caught a glimpse of bright pink flip-flops.
Hunter.
A wave of relief crashed over me. "Oh, thank God." The words slipped out, maybe a little too enthusiastically.
Hunter let out a small chuckle, but it faded as he pulled his tank top over his head. "Alright, don't freak out, but I need your bikini top."
I blinked. "Of course they made it easy without making it easy."
"Oh no, it was definitely worse." He hesitated for a second before continuing, his voice dropping slightly. "They picked Justin first."
They picked Justin.
They actually picked Justin.
Hunter rubbed the back of his neck. "But then I saw Erik's face… and, yeah. He didn't look happy." His brows furrowed, like he was still trying to figure it out himself. "And since it was kinda my fault for half-outing you guys, I jumped in before Justin could stand up. He didn't fight me on it, though."
I swallowed hard. Erik didn't like it.
He had been so unreadable when he found out about the kiss, but this? This got a reaction out of him?
I didn't have time to process it. Instead, I turned my back to Hunter, peeling off my tank top first before untying my bikini. I threw his tank top over me, but it barely helped—the armholes were so big, I might as well have been wearing a napkin.
When I turned back around, Hunter had been facing the door the entire time.
"I'm decent."
"So am I," he said, gesturing down at himself.
And God, it was ridiculous.
The bikini top barely fit across his chest, the straps digging into his shoulders, the cups not even close to covering him.
We turned to the mirror, took one look at ourselves, and lost it.
"Your tank top is giving me nothing." I turned to the side, laughing as I realized how much side boob was on display.
"I don't know, man." Hunter admired himself in the mirror, flexing his biceps. "This bikini is kinda working for me."
I let out a loud laugh—so loud it turned into a snort, and that's when I knew the alcohol was definitely kicking in.
As we headed for the door, Hunter suddenly caught my arm, stopping me. His voice was quieter this time.
"I'm really sorry about earlier. I should've kept my mouth shut."
His apology was genuine. The damage was done, but I didn't want him carrying the guilt.
I offered a small smile, even if it didn't quite reach my eyes. "Hey, it's okay. Believe me, I know you meant no harm."
We stepped out of the bathroom and walked through the kitchen toward the patio. We were met with the group's laughter before we even made it outside. Once we stepped back out into the fresh air, Hunter stopped and put a hand on my shoulder, a grin on his face.
And of course, Justin was the first to comment.
He leaned back in his chair at the table, arms draped lazily over the backrest, smirking as he gave Hunter an obvious once-over.
"Not bad." He took a sip of his drink. "But I definitely would've pulled it off better."
I didn't have to look at Erik to feel his reaction.
Hunter wasn't lying.
"I mean I wish you guys would've picked someone with more fabric." I laughed as I turned to the side slightly exposing the side boob and I tried to play it off as best as I could. The laughter erupted even louder as I sat down.
"I mean that's definitely a look Hunter." Nancy laughed as she lifted her drink in the air and Hunter mimicked the movement. Like saying cheers from far away.
"I'm just jealous that he's more covered than I am. One wrong gust of wind and it's going to be girls gone wild over here." I laughed at my own dumb joke but I could feel heat crawl up my neck at the thought. And now I was truly worried about that.
Hunter chuckled a little. "I wore the worst shirt, sorry Augs!"
"It's okay I'll just cut back on the drinks cause if I fall then well that's a free show for you guys." I added. Everyone laughed, everyone except Erik. He looked over at me and we stared at each other for a second, his face still unreadable. He bit the side of his cheek before he stood up and took his shirt off. Everyone looked over at him, someone hollered and whistled at him but he ignored it and made his way over to me. He didn't say anything but as he handed me his shirt…that said everything. He cared. Regardless of what he found out, he cared.
I watched quietly as he made his way back over to his seat. When he passed by Justin I turned to look at him and his reaction was filled with annoyance. A look I knew all too well from the time we had our first argument. But he didn't say anything, instead he took a long sip from his beer. He looked at me for a split second but shifted away in the same breath.
I looked around briefly and threw Erik's shirt on me. I slipped out of Hunter's shirt once I was fully covered and handed it back to him. A few of them groaned and said I was cheating.
"Hey you didn't say how long I had to have it on for. There's always a loophole. Remember I want to be a lawyer." I took a sip from my drink and got a few laughs. And just like that the game continued. A few more wild moments were shared, a handful of funny truths.
The game was going just fine until Nancy finished up her turn. Nancy grinned as she looked around the circle. "Okay, I pick… Hannah."
Hannah looked up, catching Nancy's eye with an almost mischievous glint in hers. "Truth or dare?"
Without missing a beat, Hannah said, "Dare."
A few heads turned as Nancy considered. Her smile grew wider. It was almost like she was enjoying this a little too much. She looked at me for a brief second and then back to Hannah.
"I dare you to kiss Erik," Nancy said, her voice playful but with an underlying edge that made me immediately uneasy.
A chorus of surprised sounds filled the air, mixed with laughter and a few whistles. My chest tightened, and I couldn't help but glance at Erik. He didn't seem phased, but I could see the hesitation in his eyes as he looked at Hannah.
I swallowed, trying to shake off the sudden tightness in my throat.
Erik stood, almost slow-motion, like he was giving Hannah a chance to back out. But she didn't. She slid off her seat, meeting his eyes, her lips curling into a confident grin. Flipping her hair to the side, off of her shoulder. Without waiting another second, she closed the distance between them.
And then without another word, they kissed.
It wasn't a casual peck, not at all. Their lips met with a heat that was unmistakable, and Erik's hand slid to the back of her neck, pulling her closer. The way he touched her… the way she cupped his face…
I should've looked away. But I couldn't.
I felt the knot in my stomach tighten, my chest growing heavier with each passing second. It wasn't just the kiss. It was the way they kissed, like they didn't want to stop.
They pulled away a second too late, staring at each other for a beat longer than necessary.
Hannah let out a breath, breaking the silence first. "Think we got 'em back?"
Erik, still not quite meeting my eyes, muttered, "Yeah. That works."
He turned to look at me, but his gaze flickered away before our eyes could meet fully. The way he avoided it, so quickly my heart skipped a beat, and I felt a rush of jealousy slam into me like a wave.
I couldn't shake the feeling that the kiss intentionally lasted longer than it should've.
Out of the corner of my eye, I caught Justin's reaction. His lips twitched up into a knowing smirk. He didn't say anything, but it was like he could sense exactly what I was feeling. The tension between us felt… thick.
I glanced down at my drink, suddenly feeling too hot, too much. But I couldn't let them see how much it was eating me alive inside, not until Hannah turned to me.
"I definitely enjoyed myself. Now we're even, right?" Her words cut through me like a knife. I heard Dani choke on her drink. The entire group went still. I saw red.
That was all the confirmation I needed…Nancy and Hannah had planned this. I almost spilled my entire truth then and there. That we'd never be even, because I had fucked Justin every night since we got here, while she couldn't even get past a kiss. It took everything in me not to ask what I tasted like on her lips. It took everything in me not to snap.
I couldn't say anything so I just smirked. But all I could think was red. I saw red.
And then a looming thought that I could slice her back just enough crept in. I spoke before I could react. The liquor giving me just enough courage. "Depends. Did he use tongue?" I raised an eyebrow waiting for her reaction but my smirk stayed put. I didn't want to look at Erik because I knew he'd be able to see through my mask, to see what I was really feeling.
Hannah mirrored my smirk, taking a slow sip of her drink. "Guess you really are a firecracker, August. I'll keep tongue in mind for next time." She winked and raised her glass toward me, letting the silence hang in the air like a challenge. I raised my glass, reaching over to physically clink her drink. Letting her know I wasn't backing down. We took a sip, staring at each other with the same condescending smiles.
Just as the silence began to feel suffocating, Dani clapped her hands and shouted, "Alright, enough with the heavy vibes, let's continue making this a night to remember!" Her voice cut through the tension like a burst of confetti. Someone hollered, "Shots to keep the night going." And before long, everyone erupted in laughter. Glasses clinked around me, and the energy shifted away from the chaos of the game.
I no longer wanted to be a part of this but I stayed for appearances sake. The rush of jealousy I felt watching them kiss was something I hadn't expected to feel. The fact that she did it on purpose somehow felt worse. And then immediately that reminded me of what Justin and I had been secretly doing to them. It was just now starting to show its cracks. I lifted my drink to take a sip but it was empty. The perfect reason to escape inside, even if for a brief moment.
As I walked over to the back door the breeze picked up the scent to Erik's shirt. I was still wearing his shirt. I lifted the neckline up to my nose. It smelled like his cologne, grounding me and flipping me upside down all at once.
I made it to the kitchen unscathed. I opened a bottle of vodka and let a heavy pour spill into my glass. I topped it off with a splash of cranberry juice, then took a quick sip, feeling the burn as it slid down my throat. As I started heading outside, I caught sight of Hannah and Erik off to the side, deep in conversation. And once again, the color red seeped through me.
But this time, instead of engaging with it, I turned around, set my glass on the table, and ran upstairs to my room. I knew I needed a breather from everything, from everyone.
I made it to my room and beelined for the balcony, desperate for fresh air. But even out there, the night air didn't feel as cool as I'd hoped. I could still smell Erik's cologne on his shirt clinging to me more than I wanted to admit.
From down below, I could hear the laughter and music spilling from the open doors, muffled voices mixing with the occasional burst of noise. It was like I was still tethered to the chaos, no matter how far I ran.
I leaned against the railing, trying to breathe, trying to clear my head. But the sounds of their carefree fun? It was hard not to feel like I was missing something. Something I clearly didn't know how to handle.
Down below, I caught sight of Justin standing near the bonfire, the glow barely flickering against his face. He was off to the side, alone, taking a slow sip from his beer as he added more wood to the dying fire. A thought crept in if I could see him, could he see me? And then almost immediately a different thought crept in. The night that Justin and I took it all the way on the balcony fulfilling a small fantasy of his. That sent me into another spiral. If something felt so good how could it be so wrong?
I pushed myself off the railing and sank onto the couch behind me, my fingers gripping the fabric beneath me. Begging myself to just breathe.
The laughter carried on below, floating up into the night, but finally, it was starting to pull me back down. With each breath, the color red slowly faded. I couldn't believe how much Hannah had gotten under my skin when, in reality, she had every right to be angry. Even if she didn't know the full truth, I did.
I sat there for a few more minutes, alone with my thoughts until I heard my sliding door open. I wasn't ready to face whoever was walking through the doors but I was almost certain it was…Allie? She walked in offering me a warm smile as she took the chair to my right.
"I noticed you disappeared and I just wanted to check on you." I hadn't realized how quiet Allie had been all night until right now. It was sweet of her to come find me.
I took a quick breath. "I just needed a break." And released a sharp exhale.
"I don't blame you, that was…a little much. I offered to switch shirts but Jacob insisted on being messy so I'm really sorry about that." Her apology felt real and her expression definitely matched her guilt.
My smile finally reached my eyes. "You don't have to apologize, I know how Jacob can be. Always looking for ways to keep everyone on their toes."
"Are you okay? Watching them kiss must've been a little hard. Especially because I saw you and Erik kissing earlier in the night." Her words came out cautiously like she didn't want to mince what she wanted to say.
I hesitated to respond and I think she sensed it but she kept quiet, giving me space to talk. "I…whatever happened between Justin and I on the first night wasn't malicious. We were drunk and it was a stupid dare. And I know I should've told Erik but I didn't expect her to go out of her way to kiss him to "get back at me" or Justin for that matter."
"I wanna believe you August but… you and Justin linger around each other. I'm not saying something is going on but you can't blame her for being suspicious."
My heart sank, it confirmed everything I already thought I knew. We were never cautious enough. Ever. And if Allie caught on, if Hannah caught on, Erik definitely had caught on.
"It's stupid…and I'm embarrassed by it but nothing is going on between us. We just have a weird friendship. I can't explain it." A half truth, I was hoping she'd believe. I glanced away briefly, fixing my gaze on the dark horizon.
Allie nodded slowly, studying me for a moment before she leaned back onto her seat. "Okay, I get it. Things happen, and not everything is that deep. If you say it's nothing, I'll believe you…enough, at least. I just hope you're not being too hard on yourself over it. Now let's get back down there and maybe have some lighter fun. I'll make sure Jacob leaves you alone tonight." Her smile was warm and inviting.
"Let me just change out of this. I have a feeling Hunter is having a blast with my bikini top. I'll meet you downstairs!"
"He was putting on a fashion show the minute you walked into the kitchen." Her laugh filled the space between, making me finally feel lighter. She stood a second later and headed out of my room. I walked back in, looking for a different bikini top. I settled for a black top that matched the bottoms I had under my denim shorts. I took Erik's shirt off, leaving it laid out perfectly on my bed and tied the black top.
I took one last deep breath before I headed out of my bedroom, downstairs and joining the group outside. The minute I stepped out Mallory's eyes met mine and she walked up to me.
"Oh cute! Much better than that frumpy boy shirt, plus we could tell it was cold outside since you weren't wearing a bra." She laughed at her own joke before she grabbed my wrist. "Come, we're doing more shots!" She tightened her grip and pulled me with her.
We made our way over to everyone, they were all gathered around the bonfire that Justin had reignited. A few comments about my outfit were made but this time it was all in good fun. I made my way through the crowd and stood next to Allie and Jacob.
The bottle made its way around the group, each taking a waterfall shot. It finally got handed to me and I knew if I took a long drink I would become messy August all over again. I took a quick sip which immediately got clocked by Jacob.
"Nah. That didn't count, we each did at least a three second shot!" He pointed at me and had a deep smirk plastered on his face.
"Rules are rules Auggie!" Hunter added. I glared at him but gave in to peer pressure. This time Jacob grabbed the bottle and began to pour it for me. The shot was well over three seconds, the majority of it spilled on the sides of my mouth. I swallowed and laughed at the same time causing me to go into a laughing cough fit that I couldn't stop. Becoming the entertainment for the night once again.
Marshall walked over handing me a napkin and I cleaned up quickly once the coughing stopped.
"Damn August, my bad!" Jacob patted my back lightly as I tried to catch my breath. Finally after a few failed attempts, I stopped the coughing. The group slowly reverted to separate conversations, Hannah and Nancy made their way back to the patio table, while Marshall, Justin and Hunter walked over to the pool. I stood with Jacob and Allie by the fire, making conversation.
I looked around and tried to make eye contact with Erik but once again he was avoiding me. He could give me the shirt off his back but he couldn't talk to me? Moments later I noticed he was making his way to Hannah and Nancy and I don't know why but it made my blood boil. It felt like he was doing it on purpose, completely avoiding me but going out of his way to talk to them. I felt bad at first for not bringing his shirt down but now I didn't.
I shifted my focus back to Allie and Jacob who are now talking about tomorrow's plans.
"Well I've been dying to do some yoga but I'll pass on you and your obsession with working out on a paddleboard." I joked with Jacob, and Allie's laugh followed. I took a drink from my glass and watched as he enthusiastically tried to convince me to join in on the paddleboard endeavors.
"Just trust me, Augs. It's more intense than you can imagine. The core strength it takes to keep yourself up. Insane. Just consider it!" He beamed as he threw his arm around Allie's shoulder and both of them began walking back up to the patio table to join the others. I wasn't ready to mingle just yet, Erik ignoring me was enough to keep me away for a little bit.
The anger simmering in my stomach was starting to bubble over. I knew I needed to walk away before the liquor pushed me to confront him in front of everyone. A loud crash from the shore called my attention, and I started mindlessly following the sound. Carried by the way the waves crashed loudly against the shore, maybe that would be enough to clear my mind.
I kicked my flip flops off at the gate, and stuck my toes in the cold sand. Taking in a deep breath as the breeze slowly took my frustration. I took a few more steps, figured I should at least touch the water since I was already here. Hoping the cold would ground me more.
As I made my way closer to the shoreline I could hear the crunching of sand behind me. Shit. Someone followed. I just needed a break from the chaos and of course the chaos followed.
Justin.
"Seriously. You have to follow me everywhere?" I let my anger come out, I'm not even sure I'm actually angry with him. I'm just angry.
Justin was thrown off guard, throwing his hands up. "I didn't realize I needed permission to walk on the damn beach." His words came out sharp, it was possible he was just as angry as I was. Hannah did kiss Erik after all and she admitted she enjoyed it.
"What do you want Justin? Don't you think they're suspicious enough?" I crossed my arms as he got closer to me.
"I just need a minute too, August. I didn't realize it would come with loopholes to jump around and NDAs to sign." He scoffed, but I could see the smirk forming on his lips.
"I really need to decompress. This night has become a little too much to bear." I crossed my legs as I took a seat on the ground, the cool sand against my legs was a welcoming contrast to the warmth that simmered inside.
He hesitated for a moment but sat right next to me. "I know… it was a little dramatic."
"A little? Your girlfriend chewed my head off for joking about you asking for a third kiss."
"Not my girlfriend." He grabbed sand and dropped a small handful on my thigh.
"You're right. She's Erik's girlfriend now." I teased as I threw a few grains of sand at his feet.
"Yeah, I fear we may have lost our soulmates." He teased back and I could feel the anger lift slightly.
"We definitely have been taking this too far." My voice dropped a little lower. Hinting to him that I wanted to shift to something more…serious.
"I know but it's just so hard because I'm looking at you right now and all I want to do is kiss you." His smirk deepened and he gave me a light shove that broke some of the seriousness I was feeling.
"See!! This is what I mean. We have to stop that." I turned to look at him. His smirk was now a soft smile. "Because despite everything that happened tonight I wanna kiss you too." I mimicked his shove but instead of pulling away I laid my head on his shoulder. "They're both really suspicious now. Erik won't even talk to me."
"Yeah well Hannah won't stop yelling at me." He muttered, but he leaned his head on top of mine.
"I bet it's not gonna help our case if they see us come back from the beach together. Or the fact that you came over here shortly after me." I laughed softly, trying not to move us too much. I wasn't going to lie, his comfort always brought me back down from wherever my head was floating to. It was these moments that made it harder to pull away from, no matter what I felt for Erik. But in the end we both knew what this was, and how it was never meant to last.
"No it doesn't." He chuckled and finally lifted his head off of mine and I lifted mine from his shoulder. I turned to face him, I couldn't read his expression but he remained still, just observing me in return. "Also sorry about the hot girl in a bikini comment. You know I think of you as more than just that. I just needed to… you know…steer clear even though I'm in the doghouse regardless." He laughed but it didn't meet his eyes.
"It stung a little, I won't lie. But it's okay. I get it, I don't even know where I stand with Erik. This is the first time I've felt uncertain about him and I." My voice came out shakier than I expected. Saying it out loud hurt more than I realized it would.
"I'm sorry for complicating things for you but it's not like you're exclusive. You're allowed to kiss whoever you want. Hannah's allowed to kiss whoever she wants and clearly he knows he's allowed to kiss whoever he wants. Take the reins. He can be upset only for so long." His smile was soft but it finally met his eyes. We stared at each other for a moment. No words. Just like earlier, his eyes spoke more than his words ever could.
He tilted his head slightly and he leaned forward, I knew exactly what was about to happen and I leaned in the same. Our lips met, the kiss was soft but slowly it began to intensify. I felt his hand grasp the back of my neck and the other hand met my waist, pulling me closer to him. I let my hand fall on his chest. His hand traced the curve of my side, trailing to my hips. If I didn't stop it now…
I jolted back, meeting his eyes for a moment before standing up quickly. He let me go but exhaled sharply, knowing exactly why we had to stop. I shook the sand off with my hands and he stood up shortly after, meeting my eyes again.
"We should probably head back. It's already not going to be a good look for us." I bit my lip thinking about the look on Erik's face if he sees us walking up together.
He took a deep breath and exhaled slowly like he was deep in the thought. "Yeah they'd never believe us if we told them we were just talking."
"We weren't so. I can't blame them. Wait, do you think you can see us down here from up there?" I turned my head back to the house, where we could see lights but couldn't see to the patio since we were off to the side.
He looked back at the house, studying it for a moment. "If someone was on the balcony, yes. But your lights are off so I'm going to say no."
"Think they'd believe us if we walked back arguing?" I joked but the look on his face was telling me he was truly thinking about it.
"That'll never work. They would immediately become suspicious. What would we even argue about?" His brows furrowed for a split second.
"It will if we make it believable! We used to argue all the time at work. We just have to tap into who we were." I shrugged my shoulders, I had fully convinced myself this would work.
"Okay but if this goes south, I'm throwing you under the bus." We started slowly walking back.
"Of course you would. That's honestly so typical of you. You know… you never take accountability for anything you do. And sometimes I wish you'd grow up." My voice grew louder as we got closer to the house.
"Wait, what? August…" He grabbed my arm and pulled me back enough for me to look at him.
"That's the fake argument dummy!" I gave him a light push and started laughing.
"Oh…" he let out a breathy laugh. "Well if you weren't so bossy maybe people would actually listen to you." He gave me a quick wink and we started making our way back up. My heart started pounding faster the closer we got. I had to make this extremely believable. I was already in enough hot water as it was. We were finally close enough to be in vision but probably not enough to hear what we were saying. We stopped at the fire pit and continued "arguing"
"I'm just sick and tired of literally picking up your mess. And the fact that I never get any support from you drives me up the wall. Every single chance you get, you tear me down. You never take any accountability but you always take credit for what I do." I know this was supposed to be fake, but suddenly, it didn't feel like it. Because this—this part—was real. The way he used to treat me. The way he always took credit. The way I used to cry in my car after work because of him. I turned my head just enough and I could see they were watching us.
"Yeah because you never listen. If it doesn't go your way what's the first thing you do? You run to Mallory to go tell her dad. And what does he do? He takes your side every time. You know a lot of us had to work hard to get where we are." His look was pointed and something shifted. The last couple of words definitely struck a nerve in me.
"Oh. So we're back to that. We always go back to that. Never mind that when I first got there everyone's time management went up 30%. So what does that tell you? I might not have my degree but clearly other people's degrees have done nothing for them." I threw my hands up in frustration.
"Don't go there, August…" His face was unreadable but his tone was sharp. By this point everyone was fully engaged in our fake argument. But it wasn't feeling fake anymore.
"I'm going there Justin. Because you've never respected me. You've never respected that I've had to work twice as hard to prove myself to you, to everyone at the office. And you did nothing but shoot me down every step of the way. Nevermind the times I left the office crying because of how much of an ass you were to me. Working with you is impossible. And being here with you is somehow worse." I spoke loud and clear as I started walking away but something told me we weren't done.
He followed closely behind me. We got closer to the patio table now. Everyone's faces were a mix of confusion and amusement. "Oh you wanna talk about impossible? Like the impossible expectations you have on everyone? On me, on yourself? You expect the world to bend for you, August. You expect everyone's world to revolve around you." He exhaled sharply, like he was about to say something he'd regret. And then—he did. "But you're not the sun, August. You're just a hot girl in a bikini that gets what she wants by crying to the boss."
I stopped dead in my tracks to face him and he looked the part. I couldn't tell where the fake argument ended and the real one started. And almost on cue my eyes welled up. I turned sharply so he wouldn't see his words hurt but it was too late for me. Everyone saw them streaming down my face so I ran for the back door. If they didn't believe it before, they did now.
He shouted for me but I didn't turn around."August! Wait. I'm-"
I ran straight to the bathroom shutting the door behind me but seconds later Mallory and Dani were at the door knocking.
"August, are you okay? What just happened? Justin stormed off back to the beach." I could hear Mallory's voice muffled through the door. I looked at myself in the mirror and I looked silly crying over what was supposed to be a fake argument. I wiped my tears away and unlocked the door to let them in.
I knew I was about to get questioned but what better time to answer than with my emotions still high. I couldn't let them know it was supposed to be fake because in the end, I did this to myself. They both walked in and closed the door behind them. My tears had stopped but my eyes were still bloodshot.
Dani spoke up first. "What's going on, August?"
I hesitated for a moment, unsure if I should tell them the truth. But if I did say the truth then the hurt would be in vain. We needed everyone to believe we were upset with each other. Even though we were no longer pretending. "I don't know, I went down to the water to get some air. I didn't realize he had followed me and we were fine one minute but then he said something I didn't like and then it just kinda snapped."
"He definitely can take things too far. I'm sorry. What he said wasn't fair at all. And no one but him thinks you get what you want by crying to Frank." Dani put her arms around me and pulled me in.
"It just hurts, no matter what I do it's not good enough. Not for him. Not for my mom. Not for Erik." Tears threatened to come out again but I didn't stop them this time.
"August, no. You are enough. More than enough and if they can't see that, it's their problem not yours." Dani's embrace tightened and I felt Mallory's arm wrap around me as well.
"You know my dad isn't an easy man to get him to agree with your ideas. So if he has taken your side it's because you've been right. You know my dad is so proud of you." Mallory whispered in my ear, breaking my heart and mending it at the same time. They held me for a stretch longer until I finally needed some space to catch my breath.
"I think the alcohol is wearing off. I need more." I joked as I wiped my tears.
"Come on, let's go get you some liquor and let's go into the hot tub." Dani looped her arm in mine and opened the bathroom door. As we walked into the living room Erik was sitting down on the couch. Once he realized we walked out he stood up nodding to Dani and Mallory. Dani let go of my arm.
Mallory leaned close to me and whispered. "We'll be outside waiting for you."
They walked away and back outside with everyone else. I could see them all gathered around staring out to the horizon.
I let out a small sigh, not entirely feeling ready to talk to Erik.
He walked closer to me but I took a small step back, trying to keep some space between us. "Are you okay?" His voice was soft but his expression was still stoic.
I could feel my chest rise and fall with each breath I took. I was anxious and uncomfortable all at once. "I don't really want to talk right now. You've been actively avoiding me and I'm too emotional to have a constructive conversation."
He took a small step forward, now his eyebrows were pinched together enough to make him frown. He parted his lips but hesitated, taking a deep breath instead. He nodded softly and finally spoke. "Okay, whenever you're ready. I'll be here."
He moved off to the side and let me walk past him. He watched as I made my way back outside where Mallory was waiting for me.
The minute I stepped out everyone that was still at the table turned to look at me. My chest tightened slightly but I offered them a small smile, thankfully Mallory grabbed my arm and we started walking to the hot tub. Marshall and Dani were already in there with a bottle in hand.
"Come join us, August. The water feels great." Marshall's voice travelled through the sound of the water jets.
"We've got the goods!" Dani shook the bottle of Belvedere lightly in front of her.
I chuckled a little bit knowing she hates vodka. "Vodka? Are you sure?"
"I hate it, but you love it and I love you so get your asses in here before I change my mind and make you go get Mr. Julio." She shouted at me and waved us over. My heart warmed knowing how much they all cared for me. We made our way to the jacuzzi and slipped in, the warm water wrapped around me like a hug I desperately needed.
Dani handed me the bottle the minute I sat down and I didn't hesitate to take the cap off and take a big swig. I let the burn settle before taking another sip. Moments later I could see Justin, Hannah, Nancy and Hunter enter through the back gate. I couldn't see Justin's face but his body language was tense, his hands were still clenched into fists. I turned my head quickly hoping he didn't see me watching them.
I could hear Hannah and Nancy laughing as they made their way over to Allie and Jacob at the patio table. Mallory sensed my tension almost instantly.
She reached over and tapped my arm gently. "Just ignore them, Auggie. It's not worth your time."
She took the bottle from my hand and took a big gulp before passing it to Dani. She took a sip and made a ridiculous noise causing me to laugh and ease some of my internal turmoil. And for the next hour we passed the bottle until we finished it, laughing, talking and even a little bit more crying, more on my part but they shed a few tears as well. I had noticed that Erik joined them back at the table but Justin was no longer there. I could feel the alcohol running through my veins and I almost forgot what I was upset about in the first place. Until Justin walked back out of the house and made his way over to us.
My heart pounded so loud I feared everyone around me could hear the steady pace it was going. He finally made it to the jacuzzi and I could tell he was upset, but before he could say anything Marshall cut in.
"Hey man, I dont think right now is a good time for all that, let's leave it for tomorrow, when the alcohol is out of our systems." Marshall's tone was smooth but his voice was firm.
Justin turned to look at me with a pleading look, a look I almost couldn't resist but somehow I did. His jaw clenched tightly and he let out a sharp exhale. I bit my lip because I almost gave in.
"Hey, we'll talk later, I promise." My voice came out soft, the alcohol slurring my last word. He nodded slowly and walked away with the promise that tomorrow would be better. I watched as he made his way back, Hannah stood up and grabbed his arm but he brushed her off and walked straight inside and she followed.
I turned to look at Marshall with a grateful smile. "Thank you," my voice barely audible but he nodded and smiled.
"I got you, the conversation wouldn't have been productive with all that liquor we just drank," He let out a low laugh and we all followed. I started feeling more light as the night continued.
Every once in a while though, I would catch myself looking over at the patio table where Erik was sitting with Allie, Jacob, Nancy and Hunter. But a twisted part of me wished Justin would walk back out and not take no for an answer to talk. I knew I was in deeper than I ever wanted to be.