From then both started to study together at the library. The library was silent except for pages turning and pens scratching. Seungmin sat across from Jisoo, posture straight, eyes focused, flipping through notes like his life depended on it.
But jisoo couldn't read a single line. Every formula blurred. Every word slipped away. Seungmin was always in front of him breathing, existing, reminding him of the lie sitting in Jisoo's chest. And it was suffocating him.
After exams, all jisoo could think of was that. He didn't want Seungmin to say yes.
A yes would trap him forever.
A no would destroy him but free him.
Seungmin, on the other hand, studied like someone chasing something he didn't understand yet. For the first time, he wanted good grades. He didn't know why. He had lived most of his life without caring whether he existed tomorrow. Teachers had seen it. Students felt it. A quiet boy already halfway gone.
But now… something was changing.
He listened. He asked questions. He tried.
And for him, that effort was enormous.
When results came out, Jisoo was first again.
No surprise.
But Seungmin....
Seungmin's grades had jumped higher than anyone expected.
Teachers stared at his paper twice. One even laughed in disbelief.
"This boy was never weak," one of them said. "He just needed a kick."
They praised Jisoo for helping him.
Jisoo smiled.
Inside, something twisted.
He realized it then.
Seungmin understood concepts instantly and things Jisoo had memorized through sheer effort. Logic came naturally to him. Patterns, systems, answers they made sense to him.
He wasn't lazy.
He was gifted.
That realization burned.
The guilt Jisoo carried didn't disappear.
It transformed.
Into jealousy.
And jealousy was easier to live with.
The 30-day holiday started.
Jisoo didn't want to sit at home and do nothing, so he took a job at the café.the same one where he used to buy coffee for Mr. Choi.
Seungmin started showing up.
Every day.
He sat for hours, watching Jisoo work but most of the time it was Seungmin who worked and jisoo sat scrolling on Seungmin phone.
The owner noticed.
Eventually, he gave Seungmin a job too.
Jisoo didn't understand his own feelings anymore.
When Seungmin wasn't around, he resented him.
When Seungmin stood in front of him, all resentment dissolved.
He treated him gently. Carefully. Almost desperately.
That scared him.
Jisoo began noticing things.
Seungmin's phone.
His shoes.
His bag — limited edition.
Expensive.
Effortless.
Even though his father was cruel, money was never lacking.
And Jisoo?
Second-hand clothes. Old shoes. A life built on effort. Old Seungmin clothes that his mother brought.
The imbalance gnawed at him.
He hated himself for noticing.
He hated Seungmin for not noticing. Still he tried his best to not show it.
After their working hours end. They didn't have anywhere to go so they started going to the market just for fun but got bored quickly.
Seungmin ended up half-asleep with his head in Jisoo's lap.
"What do kids even do for fun?" Jisoo asked quietly.
"I don't know," Seungmin said. "I never went anywhere like that. But kids from my previous school always said arcades are fun."
"They're expensive," Jisoo replied.
"We can use my salary," Seungmin said casually. "I don't really need the money. I only worked to be with you."
That should've felt good.
Instead, it made Jisoo feel small.
Someone was giving time for free. While he had sold himself for survival.
When Seungmin got his salary they went to the arcade.
The arcade was awkward.
They didn't know how anything worked.
But Seungmin laughed.
And for a moment, Jisoo forgot everything.
Then guilt came crashing back. It was a funny experience for them. Not knowing anything about any machine. They spent almost half of their tickets just to understand how the machine works. And both of them couldn't stop laughing. Both were introverts and didn't want to get help from anyone because of embarrassment. Jisoo started to forget all the hate, jealousy and resentment for him. In his heart everything settled down.
Everyday on the way home, Jisoo slowed down near the boxing club.
He stared.
Longingly.
Seungmin noticed him. So one day jisoo started to walk slowly. Seungmin stopped there.
"I want to go inside," Seungmin said suddenly.
Jisoo froze.
Inside, the air smelled of sweat and metal.
The girl at the counter barely looked at them.
"Form. Monthly fee. Five thousand."
Jisoo flinched. "Five thousand? That's—"
"Then leave," she said coldly.
Seungmin opened his wallet.
Placed ten thousand on the counter.
"For both of us."
Jisoo felt something collapse inside him.
"I'll pay you back," he said later, voice tight. "Next month, don't pay for me."
Seungmin looked at him calmly.
"I heard you're good at basketball."
Jisoo nodded.
"Teach me," he said. "You can pay me that way."
"I can teach you for free," Jisoo replied.
But he shook his head.
"You have your respect. I have mine."
That sentence stayed with him.