"Nngh! Ah, mhm~!" Mom moaned dramatically.
"C-Could you not do that while I'm feeding?!"
"B-But, your tongue…"
However, just as I was about to focus and finish...
"You're lucky today," Mom said casually. "I made a few pennies—that's the only reason we even have rice. A while back, I used to survive on corn and seawater."
"..."
Why seawater…?
"Hmm? Alex?" she said, gently shaking me. "You're getting pale. Are you okay?"
No wonder...
My whole world was crumbling.
"Hm, I guess he's probably fine," she concluded, turning to Sera who had just finished eating.
Worry about your baby more!!
Meanwhile, I begrudgingly kept feeding. It's not the milk's fault.
…What?! I was genuinely hungry!
"Allow me to introduce myself," she began. "My name is Lily. Lily Lucian."
So Lucian's my last name? Fascinating…
Almost more fascinating than the fact that if I gave her breast a squeeze, the milk—or whatever corn-flavored variation it was—came out faster.
"Alex's Papa—"
"I'd prefer if you called him 'Dad,'" I corrected.
"—went missing about three years ago. That's almost two years before I got pregnant with Alex, right up to now."
"Huh? What kind of math is that? Do you understand numbers at all?"
"Oh, and by the way, yesterday was his birthday. October 14th!"
Really? So this version of earth uses the same months?
By the way, Mom was speaking a language I technically shouldn't understand, but Sera once told me one of my native skills was auto-translating all speech.
Way too convenient. And suspiciously free of costs—unlike my other skills.
Still, it was strange how this world mirrored my old one. Even down to my father vanishing. Though, back then, it was more of an abduction.
"I am Seraphina," Sera said, bowing slightly with her eyes closed, her blue lashes fluttering down. "But please, allow me to call myself Sera Lucian."
Hey! That's not how this works! Stop getting carried away!
"Ohhh, are you that serious about my son?" Mom asked, practically glowing.
"Yes. I'm more than willing to serve him in any way he desires."
(Hey, can you stop tarnishing my image like this?!)
"I'm just happy Alex found such a devoted woman so early in life! Don't worry, Sera. I'm sure he'll be just as good in bed as his father one day."
TMI, Mom.
All my life I thought I was a pervert… little did I know, that I knew nothing.
"Isn't it a little too soon to talk about soulmates?" I squinted. "And shouldn't you be more cautious of a woman who just stole our last name?"
"Ah!"
Mhm. That finally seemed to shake her a bit. My airheaded mother.
She turned back to Sera. "I don't mind you marrying my son or becoming his sex slave—"
"Was that what we were talking about?!"
"—But I'd like to know at least a little about who you are first."
Sera looked at me for a moment. Probably seeking approval?
So she's shy now?!
(Sigh. Just make something up… I know you're smarter than you let on. Trust your gut.)
{...Master... I shall not fail you!}
Ah, that girl… We've only been together for a few hours, but I trust her—
"Mother, I am something called a System Administrator," Sera began immediately. "I am responsible for your son's every need, as I was also responsible for bringing him into this wor—"
"SHUT UP! YOU INCOMPETENT SUCCUBUS!!"
I slammed a pillow against her face to shut her up.
Turning to Mom, I panicked.
"Don't believe a word she said, Mom!" shouted a one-and-a-half feet tall one-year-old in diapers, standing on the table and clutching a pillow like a weapon. "She just made all that up to sound cool! Please, believe me! Don't send me off to some lab somewhere!"
"..."
Ah.
Only a monkey would believe me right now.
Actually, scratch that. Even a monkey wouldn't buy this.
"Sigh. Of course I knew she was making it up," Mom said, waving a hand. "There's no way my Alexander is involved in something that shady."
Hurray for airheaded moms.
Hurray!
"It's a bit surprising that you can already talk and move around like this, though—"
"Just a bit?!"
"—but I'll just assume you hit your growth spurt early."
"Mom... I think I'll have to protect you from now on. And I think Dad's an idiot for leaving you alone by yourself."
"My, that's so sweet of you. But Papa didn't really have a choice. I believe he was kidnapped by some mysterious men."
"Shouldn't we be more concerned about that?"
Mom only smiled. It looked like a sad smile to me, though. Then she turned her gaze off into the distance.
"Your Papa is a very strong man, you know? He'll beat up those bad men and come home to us very soon!"
It's been probably a year and few months already, and he still hasn't beaten up the bad guys?
Is Papa a sloth? I wonder.
*
"Anyway, now that Sera is done eating..." Mom smiled at her.
Sera smiled back.
Neither of them meant it. I could tell—zero amiability behind those expressions.
"Alex, it's time for your bath!"
"..."
"Ah, he's nose-bleeding again!"
"No, th-this is just an effect of m-my, uh... Ultra Skills!"
"Master, you're contradicting yourself."
(I said stop calling me Master!)
Before I could escape, I was in the bathroom, being forcefully undiapered by Sera.
Gh—!
She was way stronger than me!
…Well… I was a baby, after all.
"And would you stop jiggling those meat slabs in my face?!"
"My, but Master, I assumed you intended to conquer every woman you laid your eyes on?"
"Are you mental?! I'm a baby!"
"Geez! If you just wanted to suck on my breasts you could've just said so. Here."
"Get away from me! Groper!"
…Despite my deviance…