Hugo realised too late that he had gotten himself in too deep, trapped in a Kabedon of his own making...
He thought about his options...
Jill... hot babies... the EVP Blueprint...
The piping funnel that was currently in his hands...
A blushing baker...
It was highly likely that there was potential leeway to extract the EVP Blueprint from this Fergus...
if 'certain conditions were met'.
The only question was...
Was it worth the sacrifice?!?!
___
He tried to reclaim 'the frame', but his response was... unfortunately... in keeping with his usual performance, lame.
"Uh... " He said as he continued to grab onto Fergus' nozzle, like a drowning man clutching to a lifeline.
"How about you just gimme the Blueprint first, and then we can figure things out..."
___
For his part, Fergus actually didn't know what to think either.
Frankly speaking, he was just a lonely Frostmaster, and witnessing this sudden burst of passion...
made him feel things.
___
Fergus' face contorted with mixed emotions, before finally solidifying into a look of resolve.
"Look... I-I appreciate this. But... I-I can't."
"I appreciate the get-up, you even went so far as to dress-up all fancy, just the way I like... and I-I can imagine the courage it would have taken..." He stammered with a hint of admiration to cushion the upcoming blow...
"But... Aren't you a Dark Rizzard...?"
Fergus slowly shook his head.
"I-It would never work."
"You and I are from different worlds..." He said with a tinge of wistfulness.
___
"?!?!?!" Who's from different worlds?! Hugo wanted to shout. "Who wants this to work?!"
But then, he took in the whole situation, the milk, the cream, the fact that he had trapped Fergus against a wall, and was currently clutching his nozzle in his hand...
It was... a d*mning scenario...
Surely the facts, and his acts, didn't lie?!
Suddenly, Hugo began to doubt himself.
His PTSD from Sonya, his performance issues... they all began to compound in his mind...
What if... this was the cause of his issues - the fact that he was in denial?!?!
___
The audience gasped. Surely this was too much?!
Hugo... surely he wasn't...
___
Hugo shook the fog from his mind.
Jill... Hot babies... EVP Blueprint... He muttered as if in a fever dream...
Amidst the cream... it wasn't what it seemed!!!
___
Yes, that's right. He couldn't be gaslit by Author this easily... !!! He told himself.
"No, Fergus... you've got it all wrong."
"Listen bro… I-I'm not doing this just for myself." He glanced down at his cream patch, gesturing at the whole dubious soggy get-up.
"You think that I really wanted to dress up as Santa? All just for some milk and cookie, and a bit of nookie?! Surely you don't think I'm such a rookie..."
"Well I mean..."
Hugo hastily began to recount his story, of how he wanted the EVP Blueprint so that he could help Jill fulfill her dream of having hot babies, and the frustration that he currently wasn't… 'up' to the task...
___
As Fergus listened to Hugo's heartfelt confession - of a somewhat different kind to what he had been expecting, his eyes began to match Hugo's usual performative issues - that is to say, they began to soften...
"I see."
Fergus took some time to take it all in.
"Well…"
Fergus said solemnly.
"I do want to help you, Hugo..."
"But the fact is, I hid the Blueprint inside my most prized creation. It was meant to be the crème de la crème finale. The prized centrepiece. The last base before the home run. The final boundary to be crossed... The point of no return..."
Hugo clutched at Fergus' nozzle in desperation, and to cut off the bad innuendos.
"I get it. I get it... Just tell me where it is bro... please... I-I need this..."
...At last, Fergus gave a sigh, and spilled, though as always, not in that way.
"All right then. In the kitchen out the back, in the fridge... I made a massive Pie, and filled it with cream. ...That's where you'll find what you're looking for."
Hugo's look of confusion contorted into consternation, and then chilling comprehension, as Fergus continued to clarify the conditions...
"That's right... If you want the EVP Blueprint…
"-Then you'll have to take a Giant Cream Pie first…"