Chapter TextDraco had never expected to be happy. That sounded awful if he thought about it for too long, but it was simply the truth. His duty was to ensure the continuation of the Malfoy name, the Malfoy reputation. It was to live the life he was meant to, not the life he wanted to.
Yet he found happiness. As months passed, he found himself happier than he ever could have dreamed of being. He had his child. He had a husband he cared for, that he was devoted to and who adored him in turn. He had a family - his mother, his aunt, and little Teddy. He had friends who visited on weekends, and other friends who he would see with Harry. He had the chance to study what wanted, and to be useful. He was able to single-handedly meet the school's Wolfsbane demand. He had a sense of purpose.
Spring came and he watched Harry dance around their living room with Teddy in his arms, and a sense of contentment he had never known settled in his heart. He knew he loved Harry. He didn't think that Harry loved him, not the way that Draco loved him, but that was alright. What they had was enough. Harry was kind. Harry was a good man and showed every sign of being a loving father. That was enough. More than enough.
Love wasn't necessary for a marriage. A marriage could thrive with kindness, with care. And he couldn't deny that he had both of those in abundance. He was careful not to overexert himself as he began to prepare for his NEWTs, drawing out revision timetables for himself and for Harry, making sure that they both took regular breaks, because that was something he could do for the man who had saved his life. Who had given him a life.
Harry found him sat over his textbooks in the library, frowning at the pages like they had insulted his mother.
"What's wrong, Draco?" Harry asked, moving to sit beside him and half-perching on the arm of Draco's armchair. He leaned down for a look at the page.
"Patronuses." Draco muttered. "It's... I can't do them."
"What?" Harry frowned. "Almost all the DA could produce them, even if not all corporeal ones, but-"
"Dark wizards can't produce Patronuses, Potter." Draco answered, unable to stop smiling at the little wrinkle of annoyance on Harry's head when he heard Draco use his surname.
"Okay, but I don't see how that's relevant."
Draco gestured towards the sleeve covering his left arm, and Harry snorted.
"Yeah, but that doesn't make you a dark wizard, and anyway Snape could produce a Patronus, so..."
"How are you getting on with your Defence studies?" Draco changed the subject. "They will expect you to answer some theory, you can't just coast by on your reputation."
"I should be able to." Harry whined, and Draco arched an eyebrow at him. It felt better now that he wasn't expected to always hold his tongue or say the right thing. "But fine. Okay. We can study, and then you and I can practise Patronuses together. Fair?"
"If you insist." Draco agreed, grabbing his book and beginning to ask Harry theory questions. Harry kept mixing up key dates and figures.
"Harry, come on," Draco sighed, waving the text book at him. "You need to focus. You can do this. I know you can."
"I just..." Harry groaned, staring blankly at the floor. "I don't know what I'm doing next, Draco. The Ministry still want me and... and once I've done my NEWTs..."
"Just try with this, alright?" Draco reached out and threaded his fingers into Harry's own. "I can help. But you need to try so that they don't get a lasting hold over you."
That seemed to work. Harry turned to him, listening to the questions and actually trying to give the right answers. He wasn't flawless - far from it. But he was doing well enough that when they broke for lunch, Draco felt a little more hopeful that Harry would pass the theoretical section of their exam.
They ate soup together, and then Harry grinned. "Patronus time?"
"I'll try." Draco offered. "Just... don't be surprised if I can't manage it."
"That's okay. It's easier than you think," Harry answered, all broad smiles. It struck Draco that Harry was good at trying to teach people - not for theory, but for the practical side of things. That's what he'd done when Draco had still been seeking Ministry approval with Umbridge. He'd been helping people. Because that was what he was good at.
Harry walked over to the spare room they had set aside for charms practice, and Draco followed even if he felt a little anxious and painfully aware this wouldn't work. Harry slotted in behind him, one hand on Draco's wand hand to guide it, the other resting over the child that was continuing to grow. Harry was gentle with his changing body. He was bigger now. It couldn't be missed, but Harry wasn't afraid of that. Carefully, Harry moved Draco's arm, tracing the shape of the spell.
"Think of something happy." Harry told him. Draco tried. He thought of flight, how it felt to soar. He repeated the gesture, said the words, and nothing happened. He tried again.
This time he thought of lazy mornings in Harry's arms, of the certainty that he and his child were safe. Of how Harry kissed him like he had a value.
No glowing creature appeared, nor a shining silver vapour. But Draco found that he wasn't devoured by maggots the way some of the children's tales said he would be, so he supposed that was a positive enough sign.
He tried thinking of friendship, of hope, of the trust he had in his unborn child. And yet each time he was reminded of his own failures, of how he had let his friends down. And there was no faint wisp of light.
"I'm sorry," Draco whispered after he'd been trying for what felt like hours. He was exhausted and ashamed, hating how he was just proving his own worthlessness to Harry with every wave of his wand.
"You don't need to be sorry," Harry told him firmly. "It's alright. You tried. And we can practice again another day, if you want." Harry's arms were around him, holding him. There was no disgust or anger there, no sign of hatred. Harry pressed a kiss to his cheek, and he smiled to himself.
"I'll try. But later. I need to check on some of my potions." He untangled himself from Harry's arms and went to look at the potions which had been simmering over a low heat for several days. He could make complex potions and cast complex charms, but the Patronus was beyond him.
Harry didn't treat that like a failing. He told himself it wouldn't matter, that he could pass his exams without it. He was still afraid that one day Harry would realise how much better he could do than Draco, but Harry seemed to be fighting that realisation.
March faded into April, and Draco noticed a change come over Harry. He was still studying hard and spending his spare time with Draco and with Teddy. It was simply that he seemed to have less spare time than before. Previously, he'd had the occasional evening when he'd needed to go out, and Draco had waited for his return reading in the library or talking quietly to their child.
Now though, it felt like at least three evenings a week Harry would be shrugging on formal robes and walking over to the fireplace to meet with whoever it was that he was meant to be impressing this week.
"Harry..." Draco frowned at him. They'd just been settling down for Friday dinner when an insistent owl had flown in through the window, and Harry was staring at the note angrily.
"Sorry, I have to go-" Harry mumbled, and Draco held his hand out for the note.
Dear Mister Potter,
Auror Robards requests your presence this evening as we are meeting a delegation from New Zealand, and they are eager to hear of your experiences during the Second Wizarding War. We hope that this trip will form the foundation of a long and successful alliance between our nations.
Please confirm attendance by this owl.
"You could say no." Draco told him, handing it back. "They keep demanding more from you."
"I..." Harry sighed, running his fingers through his hair and making it stick up. "They say it's important. And it'll help me get a job-"
"Is this really what you want for the rest of your life?" Draco asked. "Leaving us behind so you can go and shake hands with people you don't care in the least about?"
"It's what I'm good for." Harry muttered, then looked up. "Sorry, Draco, I'm not trying to make you feel unwanted or-" Draco frowned a little at that. It wasn't about him, and he wasn't sure why Harry couldn't see that. It was concern, not jealousy, that guided him.
"I don't feel unwanted. But you're exhausted."
"The anniversary's coming up." Harry sighed. "There's a big party at Hogwarts I have to go to, but a lot of other ceremonies and..." He swallowed. "I'm not sure I want... But I have to go."
"I'll come with you." Draco sat up a little smarter.
"What?" Harry frowned. "Draco, you don't have to-"
"I'm your husband. Look, I don't want to face anyone tonight. Write a reply saying you'll come and explaining that you are having a meeting tomorrow with Auror Robards, with me present."
"I can't just ask for a meeting-" Harry protested, and Draco stared him down.
"Yes you can. You are Harry Potter. You can ask for whatever you want." He leaned up and kissed him. "Go and impress people tonight. And tomorrow we can go to the Ministry and see what we can sort out."
"I don't want to... they're not always... some of the aurors don't think much of you, Draco." Harry protested, but he was writing down the note Draco had suggested. "I don't want you to get upset."
"I won't get upset, Harry. I know how to manipulate the Ministry. Trust me, if you don't know how, you will get taken advantage of. But I can do this. I was born to do this, Harry. Can you bring me the other letters they've sent? I need to make a timeline."
"Thank you." Harry leaned in for another, deeper kiss, then walked off to go and get changed. He returned with an untidy pile of notes, each requesting his presence at some event or other, to meet foreign dignitaries and present awards. "I'll see you later, Draco."
"I'll see you." Draco promised, going over to the kitchen table and spreading out the requests. He took a few moments to simply read over a few of them, and then he got to work.
Harry apparated back in at half one in the morning. He looked tired, pale and miserable. Draco looked up from the table and smiled at him, getting to his feet and walking over to embrace him.
"How was it?" Draco asked. Harry shrugged, reaching out to rest a hand on Draco's stomach. Draco allowed the touch, leaning against him and smiling. "I've got an idea of how to approach this. Do we have our meeting?"
Harry nodded, clearly exhausted, and let Draco guide him up to bed. Draco helped make him comfortable, and finalised his plan in his mind. He laid down so that Harry could wrap around him, and smiled to himself. He was going to fix this, he was going to protect his husband because this was something that he could do.
He could tell Harry was nervous the next morning based on the complexity of the cooked breakfast that Harry had made. "I know they've said yes to the meeting, Draco, but you really don't need to go if..."
"What are you so frightened of?" Draco asked curiously. "They can't hurt me even if they want to, not while I'm carrying your child. And there are no insults they can throw my way that I haven't heard before."
"I..." Harry shrugged his shoulders, still seeming tense, but he handed over Draco's plate of food. "I just don't want you to be upset."
"What upsets me is seeing how they treat you, Harry. You've done enough. You saved everyone. You aren't a performing kappa to be made to bow at every passing wizard."
Harry shrugged his shoulders, and Draco looked across at him. Harry was still young, still hurt by the war even if he was trying to hide it. And Draco hated the Ministry for continuing to press on those wounds, continuing to demand more from someone who had already died for them.
He focused on staying calm. He was going to the Ministry as Lucius Malfoy's son, as entitled and as demanding as his father had always been. He was going to the Ministry as Harry Potter's husband, to protect him from himself and the demands that would otherwise crush him.
"What do you want out of this, Harry? Do you want to stop doing their tasks completely or…?"
"Just... just one a week would work," Harry mumbled. "I'm exhausted. And I'm still not sure if I want to be an Auror."
"You can decide that when you are ready," Draco told him. "If you joined the Aurors, I would worry about you. Of course I would worry about you. But I'll support you if that's what you choose. And between us, there's more than enough money for you to not need to work."
"What do you think I should do?"
"Work out what makes you happy, and do that." Draco answered with a shrug. Harry smiled at him, lips twisting a little in a smirk.
"Oh, I already do."
"Pervert," Draco muttered, wandering over to neaten the collar of Harry's robes. He felt a warmth settle inside of him at the knowledge he was causing Harry happiness. He stole a moment's kiss, then pulled away. "Ready?"
Harry nodded. They Flooed in, Draco first and Harry a moment behind. Draco had to pause for a moment beside the ornate fireplace in the entranceway of the Ministry so that he could catch his breath and stop himself from being sick. Harry's hand rested on his back, concerned.
"I'm fine. Your brat doesn't like the Floo Network," Draco muttered. That made Harry smile at him, his expression nervous, and hopeful, and painfully earnest.
"It's not far," Harry explained as he lead him up to an office. Harry knew the way they were going well, which was good because Draco could follow him. He kept his head held high, staring out with challenge at those who gazed at him. It wasn't long before they were shown into the office.
Harry might not have known what a grapefruit spoon was or how to use a fish knife, but he had good enough manners that he offered the single chair on their side of their desk immediately to Draco after they were called in. Draco sat down, feeling the eyes of the Head Auror upon him. Harry stood close behind him, until Robards waved his wand and summoned a second chair. Harry moved the chair so that he was close enough to take Draco's hand.
Draco watched the Head Auror curiously, choosing to reserve judgement for now despite the fact that the man was looking at him with ill-concealed hatred.
"Mister Potter, it's good to see you. Excellent work last night, they all spoke very highly of you. Now, I know you wanted to speak this morning, but if you could make it brief. I have other appointments. If Mister Malfoy is having any problems..."
"Mister Potter," Draco interrupted, lifting his hand to show his wedding ring, "is having problems with how you are working with his husband. You are demanding he sacrifice his studies to provide you with someone to show off to foreign dignitaries. You are aware that as we are both in the process of completing our final year at Hogwarts, we have examinations required for us to gain NEWTs."
Robards frowned at Draco with clear dislike. "As I have already explained to Mister Potter, we are happy to forgo the Auror entrance requirements given his prior experience. If Mister Potter hasn't told you that, I would suggest you take it as a sign that he doesn't wish for you and your kind to be poking around in Ministry business."
"Oh, Harry has told me that," Draco answered, with a simpering smile. Let the man underestimate him. He knew what he was doing. "I understand the generosity of your offer, and how useful it would be for you to have him starting down the path towards being your replacement. It would be quite the coup for you all, I am certain. However, Harry more than anyone has earned the right and time to choose his own route forwards in life. Therefore he's going to be unable to keep up with the current round of engagements."
Harry's hand squeezed Draco's, and Harry mouthed 'thank you' at him. Draco smiled back at him, returning the squeeze.
"So what do you suggest? We just leave him with a pregnant Death Eater for company?" Robard stared at him, and there was a hint of anger now in his voice. "You won't be able to destroy Potter's reputation."
"I'm counting on that." Draco answered, giving Harry's hand another reassuring squeeze. "The thing is, people will... people will naturally take Potter's side. That's what kept me from Azkaban. And so I feel we have two options. One is you continue to demand all he has, and he will be forced to make a total break from the Ministry, I am certain will be covered with some delight by The Prophet and the other papers. Or you announce your support for him continuing his studies and being there for his young family, drop the engagements down to no more than one a week, and he will in turn continue to offer his time when properly scheduled and appropriate."
A frown creased the Head Auror's face, and he stared at Draco suspiciously. "That's blackmail."
"No, it's explaining what the situation is. Harry is allowed to make his own decisions about what he wants in life. And I will support them," Draco smiled up at Robards. "You would be wise to do the same." He offered Robard's his hand to shake. "Thank you for making time in your packed schedule to speak with us today."
Robards shook his and Harry's hands, even if he didn't look happy about it. He sighed, and turned to Harry.
"It was never our intention to overburden you. I will try to ensure we hold back. And we are grateful for your continued support."
And then they were crossing back to the fireplaces. Harry pressed a kiss to Draco's cheek. "That was incredible, Draco. How do you... how did you stay so calm?"
"Practice and determination." Draco answered with a smile. "You are welcome."
"I..." Harry took a deep shuddering breath, and Draco was startled to realise that Harry was shaking a little, overwhelmed.
"Let's get you home, then we can go and sit on the couch," Draco insisted as he went to grab the powder. He got Harry home and wrapped himself around Harry as best as he could. Harry started to tremble in his arms, and Draco just held him close, promising that it would be better from now on. Harry gazed up at him with love, and Draco didn't know how to handle that.
Draco focused on studying for NEWTs, rather than allowing himself to consider the looming anniversary. One year since the Battle of Hogwarts. One year since the Dark Lord was vanquished, one year since Harry had saved everyone. One year since so many deaths.
He found himself lost in thought more often as the anniversary drew closer, but thankfully their little scorpion tried to keep him busy, distracting him whenever his thoughts grew too heavy with regret. More than once, Draco found himself waking in the middle of the night, wondering if he should refuse to attend the celebration. But he'd look at Harry, and see nervousness similar to his own in Harry's eyes.
"We can do this." Draco tried to put all his sincerity into those words as the two of them stood by the fireplace. Harry looked smart, even though his hair was its usual mess. He was wearing red trimmed robes, and he kept glancing at Draco nervously. Draco reached into his pocket and pulled out an old pair of Father's cufflinks. It was a simple enough spell to transfigure emeralds into rubies, and once he completed the spell he fastened them at Harry's sleeves. "I'll be with you."
Harry nodded, taking a few deep breaths. "Any problems, we can go straight home, okay?"
"I know." Draco reassured him. He found it endearing, the way Harry was concerned for him when he was more than capable of facing whatever was thrown his way. He knew that this was important for Harry. He was ready for another evening of snide whispers and curious looks, but Harry was worth it.
They stepped into the flame, emerging in Hogsmeade at the Three Broomsticks. Several of Harry's friends were going to be getting here early for drinks, and most of Draco's friends had decided to avoid the celebration this year.
Harry kissed Draco on the cheek, going off to track down non-alcoholic Butterbeers for them both. Draco stood there, a little tense, scanning the crowd for any sign of Harry or Hermione, or even Ron. He spotted Hermione after a moment, and she waved a hand at him. He pushed through the throng of people to join them, and it wasn't long until Harry arrived as well.
"You look wonderful, Draco," Hermione said with a bright smile.
"I look like I've eaten a quaffle."
"A big quaffle," Ron contributed helpfully, as Harry settled in beside him. Draco was aware of people staring at him and Harry.
"Malfoy," a voice called out. Draco took a steadying breath and turned to see one of Hufflepuff's old chasers staring at him. "It's true then. You're having You-Know-Who's baby."
Harry reached for his wand, but Draco shook his head, smirking a little. "Yes. I'm twelve months pregnant, a true miracle." He sneered up at the chaser in disgust. "It's not Voldemort's, you imbecile."
The boy flinched at the name, while several of Harry's friends laughed. Thomas grinned at him broadly from where he was half-draped across Finnegan. The Hufflepuff boy stared for a moment, then stormed off. Harry kept a protective arm around Draco's side.
Draco wasn't looking forward to the celebration. There was too much pain, too much loss, for that. But he was glad to be sitting beside Harry as they marked the anniversary. Harry needed - Harry deserved - to have someone with him for this day, for these memories. And Draco knew that this was something he was able to do. To stand beside him, and help split the gazes of the people around. To let people mutter and murmur, and to stand as a sign of new hope and new life, even if that was never what he had meant to be. All because Harry needed him.
He held on to Harry's hand as they walked towards the castle. It was a familiar journey, but the outline of the buildings had changed. Everything had changed. But Harry didn't let go, and he could hold on to that.