"What's your name?"
The old man patted Kai on the shoulder, signaling him to stand up.
"John Eroge."
Kai stood, eyes blazing with fiery determination.
"Alright, John Eroge. If you want to learn, I won't stop you. The only issue is—you have to completely abandon your sense of shame to master this art. Remember: this style gets stronger the older you become."
The old man stroked his long beard.
"Ah, no Master, I want to learn the Slapping Kung Fu."
"Ah, slapping is easy. Just swing hard at someone's cheek."
"THANK YOU, MASTER!"
Everything felt like one big joke.
"Alright, young man. You can go now."
The old man patted the blond-haired boy on the shoulder.
"Thank you, sir! I will remember this kindness forever!"
The boy said happily, shaking the old man's hand vigorously before leaving.
He even turned back once, waved goodbye, then finally walked away.
"That's a good kid," the old man said with a satisfied smile.
"Are you from the East, sir?" Kai asked.
"No, I'm from the Kingdom of Wind Eagles—the place we're standing in right now."
Wind Eagles?
"Wind Eagles is the central kingdom sandwiched between the other European kingdoms. It's the focal point of attention and the place that attracts the most immigrants. Judging by your face, you probably don't know much about it, huh?" Eru explained, glancing at Kai's clueless expression.
So basically, Wind Eagles is this world's America. Thinking about it… yeah, it makes sense. The place is a total cultural melting pot.
"You just arrived in this kingdom recently, boy?" the old man asked curiously.
"Ah, yes sir. I'm from Ice Breezy."
Kai answered based on the information from the documents he found in his rented room.
"Ice Breezy? You're from the enemy country? I'm honestly surprised you dared come here."
"Enemy country?"
Seeing Kai's total ignorance, the old man decided to give him a quick rundown of the political situation.
"Wind Eagles is a country that's… quite good at making people dislike it. The surrounding nations rely on us heavily but secretly hate our guts. Ice Breezy is different—it's a nation where the military is placed above everything, with iron discipline and unbreakable spirit. The two countries have hated each other for a long time, but after some royal-family-related incidents, the hatred became irreconcilable. And since our borders are right next to each other… seeing someone from Ice Breezy here really is rare."
…Why does this sound suspiciously like Russia?
"Alright sir, I don't really want to dive deep into politics. It sounds boring and way beyond my understanding, so I'll pass."
Kai scratched his head and laughed awkwardly.
"No problem. I was just giving you a quick overview of the kingdom. So… aside from wanting to become my disciple, is there anything else you want to talk about?"
"Nope!"
…That's it?
"Oh right! May I ask your name, sir? I just feel like there's something really familiar about you."
"I'm Lucius. No family name. No wife, no children—but I do have an adopted grandchild. He just told me he's in the hospital, so I'm heading there now."
Then the old man glanced at Kai's hospital gown.
"…Did you just escape from the mental hospital?"
"Huh? Nah, I just broke out of the hospital and dragged this little sister along to beat up bad guys and make money. Right, Robin?"
"Sir, this guy really is from the mental ward. The moment he saw me, he declared I was his little sister, then went around robbing—uh, I mean, beating up thugs who were harassing girls and taking 'thank-you money' from them."
"What?!"
Lucius was startled and examined Kai more carefully.
Then the old man's eyes suddenly lit up like never before. He grabbed Kai's hand.
"Whoever came up with this idea is a genius! I could use this method to easily earn money for my grandchild's hospital bills without having to play the victim anymore! Take me with you!"
"Of course, Mr. Lucius! You and I will be two justice warriors, defeating evil and robbing— I mean, gratefully receiving gifts from the good people!"
These two were oddly compatible. The only real difference was their age.
"Pipi?"
"Ah right! Why are you visiting at this hour anyway, sir? It's dark and past bedtime. The hospital should be closed—how are you even getting in?"
Kai scratched his head after Pandora (on his shoulder) reminded him.
"Don't worry. I'm old, but I've got plenty of tricks. I know this place like the back of my hand. Nothing can stop me."
"What about your grandchild?"
"…There is one exception for him."
Okay, good. He really cares about his grandkid. That one sentence alone made Kai genuinely feel closer to the old man.
Eru watched the two of them become buddies in the blink of an eye and honestly had no idea what to even say anymore.
"So Grandpa and I—should we head to the hospital first to visit your grandkid, or go punish some evildoers? You get first pick!" Kai said cheerfully.
"I want to visit my grandchild first. It's been several days since I last went, and I'm worried he'll feel lonely all by herself."
The old man started wiping tears from his eyes, then looked at Kai.
"Or… could you lend me a little money first?"
Both of them immediately stepped back. Kai eyed the old man warily.
Whoa. The moment money got involved, the friendly vibe vanished and they became total strangers again?
"Old man, I invited you to beat up bad guys together, not to borrow money from me."
"Grandson, I'm old and frail. I don't have the strength to fight villains anymore. You have to take pity on me! Us elderly folks are very sentimental and honorable, you know."
"Old man…"
"Kid…"
Then both of them suddenly threw punches—straight to each other's faces.
"?!"
Eru's eyes widened. She couldn't believe they actually started fighting??
"Die, old man!!!"
Kai grabbed a nearby iron pipe and tossed it to Pandora.
"Pipi!"
Pandora immediately began swallowing the pipe into her mouth.
"Brat! Don't think I can only stand and watch!!"
Old man Lucius slammed an elbow into Kai's stomach, forcing him to stagger back.
But seeing that Kai didn't even flinch in pain surprised the old man.
After Pandora spat out the now magically empowered iron pipe, Kai grabbed it and swung hard at Lucius.
The old man struck a Matrix pose and dodged the pipe in a flash—
but something unexpected happened.
The moment the pipe passed by him, it suddenly stopped mid-air… then reversed direction.
"?!"
Lucius was shocked. Even his own body was forcibly turned back to its original stance.
"TAKE THIS, OLD MAN!!!"
Kai roared and swung with full force. Lucius had no time to dodge and could only block.
He raised one hand and snapped the iron pipe in half with his bare fingers.
"I knew you were holding back!"
Kai tossed the broken pipe aside and switched to a new stance.
Lucius stared at the halved pipe, then at the octopus on Kai's shoulder.
"Pipi?"
Pandora tilted her head, one tentacle scratching in confusion at being stared at so intensely.
After staring for a while, the old man relaxed his posture and let out a long sigh.
"Alright, alright. It was my fault for shamelessly trying to borrow money from you. And you're right, beating up bad guys earns way more than borrowing from you."
"Oh! Awesome! Let's go then!"
Kai instantly returned to normal, walked over, and shook the old man's hand.
…That's it? They just… became friendly again like nothing happened?
Eru followed behind the two of them as they strolled along cheerfully, teasing and bantering with each other. She secretly wondered if she had just hallucinated the part where they went from enemies to friends in under thirty seconds.