"Just kidding, just kidding, uncle. I'm just trying to lighten the mood a bit." Lin Li only thought saying "hire a lawyer" sounded cool, so he wanted to say it.
If it weren't for the fact that adding curse words would make it inappropriate, Lin Li really wanted to recreate the scene of Carl from Shameless.
"Do you know that my blood pressure has been kept high from all the excitement you've been causing? Is this how abstract kids these days are?" Yang Liang really had a headache.
He now wanted to meet Lin Li's parents to ask for some parenting advice, so he could avoid making the same mistakes.
"That's not it. I'm so outstanding that I'm quite rare." Lin Li shook his head.
The only person around him who could clearly crush him was Bai Bufan, otherwise, how would they be such good brothers?
"Great! The country still has hope." Yang Liang let out a sigh of relief.
Lin Li: "?!"
That was such a dirty insult.
"Let's stick to a Q&A format." Yang Liang waved his hand. He realized that if he handed over control to Lin Li, the conversation would go off in an unpredictable direction.
"First, how did you find out about the Qingjue Wellness Center secretly offering services related to… well, you know?"
"A friend told me." Lin Li replied. "When in doubt, rely on friends." "As for the friend's name, I don't think it's necessary to say, right?"
"Even if you told us, we wouldn't investigate your friend, but we understand why you don't want to share their name. It's your choice." Yang Liang nodded, agreeing that it made sense.
Then he asked the real question that piqued his curiosity: "So, Lin Li, why didn't you report this right away and instead went to… experience it first before informing us?"
Lin Li thought: Ask the system, not me!
"I wasn't trying to sacrifice myself for the greater good," Lin Li said internally. I didn't want to dive into the situation. But of course, he couldn't say that out loud.
"First, my friend actually only heard about it through word of mouth, and didn't personally go. So to avoid reporting false information, I had to verify the truth first and gather evidence. That's why I did an on-site investigation, and when I called you, I had already confirmed everything."
"Secondly, I must clarify something—I am pure and innocent, I haven't lost my virtue..." Lin Li paused. "What's with that expression, uncle? Are you laughing? I'm being serious here."
"We've received professional training, and no matter how funny it gets, we won't laugh." Yang Liang pressed his palm to his mouth, speaking sincerely.
"Unless we can't hold it in?" Lin Li's teeth were itching.
"It's not that I don't want to believe you, it's just that when I went into your room, none of you had your clothes on." Yang Liang recalled the scene and was a bit embarrassed.
"That's not true! Only Xiao Jing wasn't dressed, and she only lacked her top!" Lin Li's voice raised. "And luckily, I have recordings to prove my innocence."
Lin Li pulled out his phone, opened the second half of two long audio recordings, and began to play them in fast forward while occasionally adjusting the progress bar.
"..."
"Miss, please show some respect!"
"..."
"See, see? Uncle, I was really keeping my virtue. I even said 'show some respect,' how could you doubt me?"
"Forty minutes, that's forty hours! You have no idea how I spent those forty days of being ignored! Do you know how painful and torturous it was?" Lin Li stood up, shouting hoarsely, his eyes a little red. He seemed way too caught up in the role.
Yang Liang didn't say anything, took Lin Li's phone, rewound the recording a bit, and then the phone started playing Lin Li's own voice again:
"... Move a little to the left, yes, press on the calf muscle, a bit harder, yes yes yes, I—ah!~~ Ah, yes~~"
"In those forty years, were you in pain? Were you tortured? I didn't hear it." Yang Liang looked seriously at Lin Li.
Lin Li scratched his head and sat back down awkwardly. "Alright, alright, let me clarify. While my body may have felt pleasure, my spirit was constantly in torment and suffering..."
Yang Liang: "..."
Yang Liang: "I've heard enough, haven't I?"
Lin Li quickly clicked the progress bar back to the point where Xiao Jing was about to force herself on him, then said:
"Did you hear that? I had no idea she had taken her clothes off! If you had arrived a bit later, I would've been forced or, even worse, done for! Forty minutes—how could it take that long? I'm going to report you guys for negligence!"
Lin Li's tone was filled with grievance.
Yang Liang, despite his professional training, couldn't hold back his laughter. Lin Li glared at him with even more resentment. "Aren't you going to explain yourself?"
Yang Liang wiped away a tear, still trying to compose himself. "My teeth were too hot, I had to cool them off."
"That's not the explanation I wanted!" Lin Li snapped back, then returned to Yang Liang's earlier question.
"Hmm, I just want to clarify. We did receive the report immediately and didn't waste any time. But, in such places, we always need to be cautious. We sometimes leave people at nearby street corners to act as lookouts."
"To ensure the operation goes smoothly, you can see we're all in plainclothes. We're driving our personal cars, and we had to gather more people. All this takes time. Honestly, we got there in forty minutes, which is quite fast. You can't blame us for that."
"And even if something did happen to you, after considering the circumstances, we wouldn't hold you responsible."
"Ah? You should have said that earlier! You guys messed with me!" Lin Li was instantly upset.
Yang Liang: "?"
Watching Lin Li lamenting in regret, Yang Liang couldn't help but shake his head in amusement. This kid was really something—given an inch, he took a mile.
"I thought you'd be a bit more humble after being arrested. Still acting so tough and wanting handcuffs and a police car ride, huh? So you've been fearless all along, knowing you're in the clear, and just wanted to experience everything, huh?" Yang Liang laughed.
Lin Li nodded with a grin: "Kind of. I really couldn't reveal my identity on the spot, there were still people around, and I'd be in danger of being retaliated against afterward."
"Fair point, I suppose. Being cautious is definitely important." Yang Liang sighed. "Alright, I've got everything I need to write my report. You're free to go now. I'll give you a ride home."
"If you want to take photos by the door, go ahead now. If you want a ride in a police car, I can arrange that too. It'll fulfill your last wish."
"Sure, but there's one more thing." Lin Li raised a finger.
"What's that?" Yang Liang asked.
"Well, for my undercover work, I've paid the hefty price of 399. You know I'm still a student, so that's a big deal for me. I'm not asking you to reimburse me, but would it be alright if you returned it to me?" Lin Li asked carefully.
"That's 399! 798 spicy strips! 133 bottles of iced Big Tea! One Spring Breeze Fairy (Zhang Fei mold)! I could ride the teeter-totter all day for that much money."
"You got a massage, didn't you?" Yang Liang teased.
"That's probably just a 99 service! The extra premium, I explicitly turned down! So, uncle, how about refund me two hundred, and the rest can be considered a kickback to you guys?" Lin Li argued persuasively.
"Kickback my foot!" Yang Liang laughed and cursed. "Of course, we'll refund you the money. And since you're the informant, you might even be eligible for a reward. But transferring money via her phone directly is illegal, so I can't do that. We'll need to follow the proper procedure."
"If you need money, I can transfer it to you first, and you can repay me once it hits your account."
"No rush, I can wait." Lin Li waved his hand nonchalantly. He still had enough living expenses for now. As long as the money came back to him, everything would be fine.
"Anything else?" Yang Liang asked.
"Actually, yes." Lin Li thought for a moment, then nodded again.
"What's the matter?"
"Can you let Xiao Jing come with me for about 20 minutes? 10 minutes would work, but 5 minutes... no, 5 minutes is too short."
Yang Liang stared at Lin Li, surprised by the sudden request. "?"
"I have some important questions for her. Oh, and while you're at it, could you prepare a bed for me, like a 1.8 by 2-meter one with a mattress, some jelly, pop rocks, and ice cream—"
"Shut up and go home!" Yang Liang interrupted.
"Alright, uncle!" Lin Li grinned, then happily left.