After what could generously be called a "challenging" battle, the Ur-Ghast finally dissolved into particles before Mario's eyes.
"Boss fights aren't what they used to be," he muttered, standing in the pouring rain.
He walked over to the loot chest the Ur-Ghast had left behind and crammed everything directly into his inventory without bothering to sort it. Boss-exclusive drops were always worth keeping.
Pulling out his magic map, he examined the scattered icons marking nearby dungeons and structures.
"Closest one is... ugh, the Labyrinth."
Honestly, he hated labyrinths. The complicated layouts were hell for someone with his mediocre sense of direction. But with his upgraded pickaxe, he could always just mine straight through walls if he got lost.
He pocketed the map and walked to the edge of the tower, preparing for a leap of faith back to ground level.
The wind rushed past his face as he fell. A thick lightning bolt crackled past him. The thunder that followed nearly burst his eardrums.
Still airborne, he jerked in surprise, almost dropping the water bucket he'd been holding for a safe landing.
"Mamma Mia!"
Before he could react further, a purple health bar materialized in his vision.
[1UP | Ender | Bulwark | Gravity]
Those four modifiers made Mario's blood run cold.
"Are you fucking kidding me? That's the most broken combination possible!"
His body suddenly lost all control mid-air, yanked downward by an invisible force toward a green figure below. When he finally got a clear look at what awaited him, he froze for a second.
It was a Charged Mutant Creeper, but unlike the squat, blocky regular creepers, this abomination had long, spindly legs that made it look like some kind of explosive spider-demon hybrid.
Maybe it was his imagination, but he could swear the thing was laughing at him. That distinctive hiss sounded almost mocking, as if saying "Surprise, motherfucker!"
The Gravity modifier combined with his falling momentum meant he crashed down right in front of the creeper in seconds. A swarm of regular Charged Creepers materialized around him, summoned by the boss.
He pulled out his wand and used Blink to teleport away just as the creepers began their fuse sequence.
"How am I supposed to fight this? Each explosion does 145 damage! I've only got 200 HP, that's two hits and I'm paste!"
"Freeze!"
Frost erupted from his wand, encasing all the regular Charged Creepers in ice. But the Charged Mutant Creeper dodged with unnatural speed.
Those weren't just for show, the creature leapt high into the air while he cast a defensive buff on himself.
The Charged Mutant Creeper landed beside him with a thunderous BOOM. The explosion crater was massive, and even with his buff active, his health bar dropped by over 40 points.
His eye twitched as he checked his remaining HP.
Another wave of Charged Creepers spawned. He had no choice but to go on the offensive, unleashing a storm of attacks at the Charged Mutant Creeper.
But 80% of his strikes were dodged thanks to the Ender modifier. The few that did connect dealt pitiful damage because of the Bulwark trait's damage reduction.
The only silver lining was that regular Charged Creepers couldn't dodge his attacks. He cleared them while trying to chip away at the boss.
"Blink!"
The Gravity effect pulled him down again. Mario teleported away just before another explosion, but the Charged Mutant Creeper immediately leapt after him like it was playing a twisted game of tag.
Another familiar BOOM. Another chunk of his health gone.
"Font of Vitality!"
The Master-tier healing spell activated, granting him Life Regeneration III and Resistance III. His lost HP began recovering rapidly, but not fast enough.
Even with his overwhelming power and fully upgraded gear, he had never imagined being pushed this hard by a single elite mob. As the Charged Mutant Creeper's health dropped lower, its attack speed and aggression increased proportionally. Even with Regeneration III, he was barely keeping pace with the damage.
Thirty minutes of intense combat later, a loud explosion echoed across the Twilight Forest.
The blast radius spanning dozens of meters sent Mario flying. When he checked his health bar and saw only 20 HP remaining, he couldn't help but laugh bitterly.
"If that thing had one more modifier, I'd have been forced to retreat."
He waved his wand and cast another Font of Vitality, this was the first time he'd ever completely drained a wand's mana reserves mid-combat.
Walking toward the massive crater left by the Charged Mutant Creeper's final explosion, Mario spotted something at its center. A green egg.
Joy flooded through him as he jumped into the pit.
"Charged Creeper pet!"
This was one of the rarest drops from mutant creatures. Mutant Charged Creepers themselves were already extraordinarily rare, and with basic mods installed, most players who encountered one simply died. No second chances.
Mario carefully picked up the creeper egg and balanced it on his head. According to the mod mechanics, he just needed to stack two chests on top of it to hatch his very own pet.
What Minecraft player could resist having a cute little green explosive following them around?
That egg was the only reason he had endured thirty minutes of punishment instead of just teleporting away. No way was he leaving without his prize.
With the creeper egg balanced precariously on his head, he mounted his hover platform and sped toward the Twilight Portal. The last thing he needed was for some random mob to knock it off before he could get it home safely.
Passing through the portal, Mario finally returned to his apartment.
"Finally! Home sweet home."
He collapsed onto his couch with a satisfied sigh. Just as he was getting comfortable, his phone rang.
Pulling it out, Mario was surprised to see Natasha's name on the caller ID. She rarely contacted him directly unless something serious was happening.
He answered the call. "Yeah?"
Natasha's voice was almost drowned out by background noise.
"Mario, we've located Dr. Banner. Can you help us calm him down?"
Through the phone, he could hear the Hulk's bellow followed by what sounded like a tank being torn apart.
"Send me your location."
He immediately contacted Kaecilius through their communication crystal, requesting a portal pickup. He had been keeping tabs on Banner for a while now. A man like that would be perfect for his company's research division.
Moments later, sparks flickered to life in his living room as a portal materialized. Kaecilius stepped through, took one look at Mario, and froze.
"Mario... your green hat is quite the statement."
"It's an egg."
The creeper egg wasn't perfectly round, more blocky. At first glance, especially from certain angles, it really did look disturbingly like a tall green hat perched on his head.
Kaecilius examined it more carefully, then nodded thoughtfully. "Ah, I see. Your green egg is quite the statement too."
---
Natasha lowered her binoculars and stared at the Hulk, who was currently demolishing what remained of a military convoy.
"The military..."
At least they'd waited until Banner left town before springing their ambush. The fight was happening in a desolate wasteland far from any civilian population. Several soldiers armed with automatic rifles opened fire on the Hulk. Bullets turned into streams of metal that bounced harmlessly off his tough skin like rain off a windshield.
"HULK!!"
The Hulk roared and charged straight toward a nearby tank, backhanding a soldier who tried to block his path. The man flew thirty meters before hitting the ground. Dead before impact.
Natasha watched through her scope. She'd seen a lot of things in her career, but watching the Hulk in action never got less terrifying.
BOOM!
A tank fired. The Hulk sensed the danger and leapt aside with surprising agility for something his size. He landed directly on top of the tank, his impact denting the armor plating and leaving massive footprints.
With another roar, the Hulk grabbed the tank's cannon barrel, still hot from firing, and with his muscles bulging, literally tore the tank open like a sardine can, exposing the horrified crew inside.
"Oh my God!"
"How are we supposed to fight this thing?!"
"If I survive this, I'm quitting the army!"
Everyone turned to stare at the soldier who'd just said that. Classic death flag.
BANG!
The Hulk brought the tank's upper half crashing down onto the rest of it. The soldiers inside were instantly pulverized, blood splattering in every direction.
An attack helicopter locked onto the Hulk and fired a missile. The projectile struck him dead center with a loud explosion, blasting him backward and leaving a deep gash across his torso.
But the wound was already healing, knitting back together at visible speed.
"HULK!!!"
He'd grown angrier. And bigger. His muscles swelled, his height increased by at least half a meter, and his eyes burned with pure rage.
With a mighty throw, he hurled the tank's cannon barrel.
"No, no, NO!!"
The pilot barely dodged, his reflexes and the helicopter's maneuverability the only things keeping him alive. But the Hulk wasn't done. He leapt after the helicopter with impossible height, forcing the pilot to fire every remaining missile in panic while pulling up hard.
BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!
The barrage hit the Hulk mid-air, but the damage was noticeably weaker than before. He was adapting, getting stronger, and most importantly... His pants had finally given up the ghost.
The Hulk stood there in all his glory, unbothered by the wind or the shocked stares. The entire battlefield fell silent for a moment.
Then, the battle resumed, but the soldiers were breaking. Many simply turned and ran. This wasn't a fight, this was a massacre, and they wanted no part of it.
The Hulk seemed satisfied with routing his enemies. Rather than chase them, he picked a direction and started sprinting at full speed.
Directly toward Natasha's position.
"SHIT!!"
She turned and ran. Even with her enhanced physiology, getting hit by that thing would be fatal. She wasn't tougher than a tank.
"Mario, where are you?!"
What she didn't know was that Mario was currently having a very important discussion with Kaecilius about green hats and eggs.
---
Back at the apartment, Mario faced a dilemma. The creeper egg couldn't hatch in his inventory, but walking around with it balanced on his head was beyond awkward.
"Can you use magic to make the egg invisible or something?"
Kaecilius examined the egg, then extended his hand. Golden magical energy flowed from his palm toward the egg, which began glowing in response.
After a moment, he stopped, looking apologetic. "I'm sorry. This egg is unusual. My magic isn't strong enough to properly conceal it."
"What do you mean? The spell didn't work?"
"Not exactly..." Kaecilius conjured a mirror of space. "See for yourself."
Mario looked up and saw the creeper egg now glowing bright green. His face darkened considerably. He stared at Kaecilius for a long, silent moment.
"Did you do that on purpose, or was it an accident?"
"I swear it was an accident!" Kaecilius said quickly. "When my magical energy touched the egg, it absorbed everything instantly. By the time I tried to stop, it was too late."
Mario sighed heavily, looking at his glowing green head in the mirror.