Hey!
How goes it, Kid?
How are you all, Folks?
I've been...
Hmm.
As good as I can get, you know?
I am pretty sure I will be moving soon, and that gives me a decent chunk of anxiety.
I spent a decent amount of time in the Foster Care system, so moving tends to be a bit...jarring for me.
But I'll be okay.
I will
I have no choice.
I have to continue to grow and learn, and evolve, and that entails taking new and terrifying steps.
I was single for the past nearly three years, and that has shown and taught me a lot about myself.
I've healed a lot of old traumatic damage from my past, and I am doing my best to love and learn from a new, clean set of eyes.
It's not cool or fair to carry old baggage into new relationships, you know?
It will only make the growing and learning process that much more complicated.
No one needs or deserves that.
Not me, nor her.
Nor You, Kid.
I don't know if I can physically produce children.
I have no idea if it was me or if my ex was secretly on birth control for the extent of our relationship, but I've had no luck thus far.
Hmm.
We also didn't have sex very often, another thing that was lacking in whatever that was we had between us.
My only real regret is that I didn't leave her so much sooner...not for me, but for the odds of YOU being born.
I screwed that one, Kid...
I stayed where I should never have stayed, and for far too long.
So if you never come to be...well, that's on me.
Bah.
Don't chase love, Kid.
Love who loves you and be happy.
Life is far too short.
Pour into who pours into you.
That goes for all of you as well, Folks.
Enjoy.
(Slaps a handful of glowing buttons on the dashboard of the Slappery-Slappish-Slappington 3000! Lights and such flash in a wild array of colors and patterns.)
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June 28th, 2020.
-----
Dear You.
I hate not having a pen.
The world needs change...
I hope you are born to be a part of that.
Maybe you'll be a light in the dark.
More than I ever was...
I love you,
Even if you never come to be...
-Dad.
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(Splaps back into 2025 with a mild headache and a sense of annoyance...)
Hmm.
-I never liked writing with pencils. They annoyed me from a young age, lol. I am sure it was the stark silence of my old classroom that did it for me, and the chorus of scratching noises that permeated the place. It would drive me crazy to hear 10-20 other pencils scratching at once while we did a test or whatnot.
It was torture, lol.
I write with pens these days. Pens of all shapes and sizes lol.
Beware, I may just steal your pen if it is interesting enough to me!
-This world will always need change. Always.
Racism is not going anywhere, and not enough people seem to care to pitch in on its eradication.
Humanity is a strange species, you know?
I just hope that YOU get to become a real thing one day, Kid.
Maybe you will be a part of the change that this world needs.
Hmm, indeed.
I try to produce enough poetry and short stories to contribute to the world in some way or another, you know?
People need people.
I am glad to be able to help in whatever ways I can.
I hope that this little entry has made someone feel even a bit better today/tonight, and I hope that I see you all back here for the next one.
I love and appreciate you all, and I hope that these holidays are good ones for you and yours!
I will see you all back here soon, yeah?
I love and appreciate all of you for continuing to come back.
Safe travels, Kid.
You all as well, Folks.
And as always:
Stay safe.
Stay healthy.
Stay vigilant.
-Bluu.