AN: I am Back Bit*hes, I landed safely in my home country early in the morning. Now I immediately got to work after such a long time of flight, so I am going to sleep after this. Thanks!
The garage door squealed open on its battered rails. Rick waved Morty forward with the enthusiasm of a DMV instructor who'd failed at life and alchemy. "Alright, Morty, you ready to finally do something useful?" Rick slapped the side of the Space Cruiser. "We're gonna teach you how to pilot this baby."
Morty's eyes went wide. "Oh, jeez? You're serious?"
Rick sighed. "I'm Rick. I'm never serious, but yeah, let's do this. It'll be liberating, you know? I can finally make you run errands for me across three galaxies while I get drunk in peace."
Morty scrambled into the driver's seat, practically vibrating. "That, that sounds kinda cool! I mean, only you and Richard can fly this thing. If I learn,"
Rick raised an eyebrow. "Ahhhh, there it is. There it is! Kissing that shiny Richard-ass. You want big bro's recognition so bad you're drooling on my seat."
Morty's face went red. "N-no, I don't! I don't want Richard's recognition. That's not, I mean, I just want to be helpful!"
Rick snorted. "Kid, you don't need anyone's approval. Least of all Richard's. He doesn't give a shit if you're 'helpful.' He'd respect you more if you killed someone with a spoon and said it was science."
Morty scowled. "That's not true."
Rick leaned back, belching. "Suit yourself."
As Morty adjusted the controls, a blinking green light flashed on Rick's wristband. He frowned. "Hold on."
He tapped it. Static hissed. A voice, low and distorted, murmured something inaudible. Rick's expression darkened. "Yeah. Where? Okay, got it."
He cut the call and shoved Morty out of the driver's seat. "Lesson's over, Morty. Get in the passenger side. We got business."
Morty pouted. "But what business? Come on, let me come with you!"
Rick shot him a glare. "It's not fun business, Morty. Just stay here."
"Why? Is it shady? You're always being shady!"
Rick's voice dripped with sarcasm. "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realize I needed to run my criminal conspiracies by my teenage grandson. Shut up and sit tight."
Before Morty could answer, another voice piped up. "So...uh...Rick? Which lever is the brake again?"
Both Rick and Morty turned in horror. "JERRY?" "Dad?"
Jerry waved from the back seat. "We agreed that a boy's father should be present when he's learning to drive!"
Rick slapped his forehead. "We did not agree on that. I told you to stay the hell out of my ship!"
Jerry blinked. "Well, I'm here now."
Rick fumed. "We don't have time to drop you off."
Jerry shrugged. "I'll just come along."
Rick growled. "Yeah. No."
He typed on the console. The ship rattled and angled sharply, blasting through a portal that spat them out above an asteroid belt. They docked at a glittery neon station floating among the rocks. A sign read: JERRYBOREE: Unregistered Cross-Temporal Jerry Daycare.
Rick shoved Jerry toward the hatch. "Alright, bye. Don't eat glue."
Jerry looked around in horror. "Rick, is this even legal?"
The door hissed shut. Rick pounded a button, launching them away. Morty watched the station grow small in the window. "Grandpa Rick, you're awful."
Rick cracked a grin. "Thanks."
{Back on Earth}
Summer was sprawled on the living room couch when Beth walked in. "Honey, have you seen your Grandpa?"
Summer turned the music up. "He's off with Morty. Again."
Beth raised an eyebrow. "Doing what?"
"Probably being assholes," Summer muttered. She paused. "Wait. Wait a second."
She shot up and stomped down the hall, banging on a metal door. "RICHARD!"
The door cracked open. Richard peered out, eyebrows twitching in annoyance. "What?"
"You're here? Great. Awesome. Morty's off on some dumb adventure with Rick without me!"
Richard blinked. "So?"
"So?!" She stormed in, waving her arms. "I thought it was gonna be us two left behind! But now Morty's all learning to drive the Cruiser, and I'm just here."
Richard scowled. "Can you not shriek? You're rattling the chips in my neural mesh."
Summer huffed. "I'm serious!"
He was about to shut the door in her face when she shoved a jar forward. It rattled with cookies. Richard froze. He eyed the jar. Summer smirked. "Yeah. Thought so."
He snatched it, ripped the lid off, and took a bite. Crumbs scattered. He grumbled, "Fine. Sit."
They both flopped onto the metal floor. Music thumped faintly through the walls. Silence. Finally, Summer whispered, "You gonna say I'm pathetic? Or that I should've tried harder? Or I'm not fit for...anything?"
Richard crunched loudly. "No."
Summer blinked. "...Really?"
Richard shrugged. "Get good."
Summer scowled. "That's it? Get good? How?!"
He licked his fingers. "I'll show you."
{Aboard Richard's Ship}
Summer sat in the pilot's seat, bouncing with nervous energy. Richard slouched next to her while the AI, Jack, materialized as a floating blue orb. Jack's voice was dry and posh. "Welcome, Miss Smith. Shall I go over the flight manual for the fifth time?"
"Shut up, Jack," she snapped.
Richard grunted. "Listen to him."
She huffed. "Fine."
As the ship powered up, Jack recited instructions. Richard corrected her grip on the controls. Summer grumbled but followed directions. They broke the atmosphere and shot into deep space. But the second she tried to orbit their target planet, she oversteered, and they crash-landed on a nearby moon.
Metal shrieked. Sparks flew. The whole cabin pitched sideways. When it finally stopped, Richard sat back calmly. "Huh."
Summer's eyes welled. She ripped off the harness and ran out of the ship, sobbing. Richard didn't shout. Didn't follow. Jack flickered on his shoulder. "Sir?"
Richard sighed. "Which moon did she land us on?"
"Calculating...it's the second moon of Talizar. Uncharted fauna. Hostile to some degree."
Richard pinched the bridge of his nose. "Perfect."
Outside, Summer sat on the gray sand, head buried in her knees. Richard approached slowly, Jack floating behind. Jack dropped a small chip next to her. "The Life Codex, Miss Smith. Full atmospheric adaptability, language processing, and minor metabolic boosts."
She sniffed, wiped her eyes, and snatched it up. Richard just watched her silently.