Sakura raised a hand to shield her eyes from the storm of flash photography that met her the instant the red curtain rose.
"Over here, give us a smile!"
As the proud owner of a pair of breasts, Sakura was no stranger to being stared at, yet even with her hardened indifference she was beginning to feel like a piece of meat on the chopping board. There was such a thing as too much attention, and it was getting in her way of objectifying the other women present at the Rinne Festival beauty pageant, standing in a row with her on stage.
A woman on Sakura's left began fidgeting nervously.
Even in this enlightened age, where women could become Hokage, a large part of academy training was still devoted to teaching impressionable young kunoichi how to deal with men, such as how to act as ordinary, powerless girls to escape detection, how to seduce and blackmail, and how to gather information behind enemy lines during covert infiltration missions.
Yet even that specialised training had not been enough to prepare them for this.
"This isn't as fun as I thought it would be…" Naruto mumbled in a low voice.
Naruto loved attention even more than ramen, so he was always ready to pull out his trusty Harem no Jutsu to get reactions out of closet perverts and get a laugh out of them, but this…? This wasn't what he wanted…
"Must find a marriage partner, must find a marriage partner…"
If there was one person who seemed entirely unbothered by the excessive lust and the male musk practically oozing from the audience and suffusing the very air, it was Terumī Mei. Owing to her failed bid to become Mizukage, and to the awkward fact that her strength far outstripped that of the actual Mizukage, Momochi Zabuza, she had been edged out of her village's power structure, leaving her with far too much time on her hands.
Nadeshiko Shizuka was standing next to Mei, a look of undisguised scorn etched into her striking features. As the newest leader of her village, itself subordinate to the Hidden Mist, which ruled the isles of the Land of Water with an iron fist, she had had no choice but to attend, unwilling to subject those under her to such humiliation.
"I was told Jiraiya's disciple would be here," she grumbled, "but all I see is that perverted old man!"
The master of ceremonies' disembodied voice suddenly rose above the hooting and cheering of the assembled noblemen, rich businessmen and distinguished visitors from distant lands. "Ladies and gentlemen, welcome!" his voice boomed. "Welcome to the first revival edition of the Rinne Festival's beauty contest!"
A spotlight shone from the ceiling, illuminating a desk at the forefront of the room, directly in front of the stage, at which sat three people. Three buttons had been placed before them, and three brightly lit X's gleamed on the side of the desk facing the stage, Britain's Got Talent -style.
"Please welcome our judges!" the emcee shouted into his microphone. "First and foremost, our beloved Daimyō, Lord of the Land of Fire, Enka no Masakado Suigyōmatsu Unraimatsu Fūraimatsu the Tenth of his name, who I'm sure needs no introduction!"
"That's his name?" Sakura gasped in realisation. "That's who I've been working for all this time? I had no idea!"
The Daimyō smiled and waved at the camera to light applause from the crowd.
"Our second judge is a gentleman of culture who's saved our country more times than we can count, a man who knows no equal… Of the Legendary Sannin, the Gallant… Jiraiya-samaaaa!"
The spotlight shifted slightly to the right, revealing a giant, white-haired man dancing atop the judges' desk, concluding his little jig with a flamboyant kabuki pose. Naruto and Sakura facepalmed as the Pervy Sage grinned at the camera, flashing twin peace signs to thunderous applause.
The spotlight moved to the left end of the desk, briefly illuminating the Daimyō picking his nose as the beam of light flashed past him.
"And our third and final judge is the up-and-coming Tarutsu, young heir to the Gatō shipping empire! After his father's unfortunate passing at the hands of rogue shinobi, he has singlehandedly rebuilt his family's company from the ground up!"
Naruto blinked.
It had been a while since he'd last heard it, but he was almost certain he knew the name Gatō. And then, all at once, it hit him— Gatō was that bastard who had terrorised the Land of Waves, stopped old man Tazuna from building the Great Sakura Bridge, and murdered poor crybaby Inari's stepfather!
He opened his mouth to decry the injustice of calling Gatō's death unfortunate, but before he could utter a word, Sakura tugged at his sleeve to catch his attention and gave a subtle shake of her head. The Daimyō wasn't someone he could mouth off in front of, unlike Tsunade.
All three cornerstones of the Land of Fire's power were assembled here tonight: the military in Jiraiya, the nobility in the Daimyō, and the capitalists in Tarutsu. Violence, the long arm of the law, and money— these were the forces that made the world turn, and pretty little things like Sakura and the other kunoichi present were little more than arm candy for these powerful men to admire. These were the people she was supposed to be serving and protecting… and Sakura did not like it one bit.
"Is it just me," Naruto murmured, "but is that guy staring at us, you know?"
Lots of people in the crowd were staring at them, but lust filled their eyes, not undisguised loathing… Sakura was beginning to get a bad feeling about all this. The sooner this stupid event was over and done with, the better.
"Onto the first round," the emcee shouted into his microphone, "which shall consist of… posing!"
The crowd erupted into rapturous applause.
Sakura and the others had already been briefed on how the contest would be run. The pageant would consist of three rounds, with a number of contestants eliminated after each. The first round was posing, the second a talent show, and the third… was apparently a secret.
And so, each kunoichi on stage struck a pose. With the lithe physiques of peak athletes and the beauty of supermodels, they captured the attention of the judges and the crowd far more than any of their wives ever could… yet none drew as many eyes as Sakura.
"But hang on, what's this!?" the emcee shouted. "Contestant Manyū Sakura has turned away from the judges— could it be that she has been overcome by shyness? Why would she hide her best assets? But no, could it be!?"
Sakura arched her back, one hand resting on her hip and the other on the back of her head, her body turned fully towards the rear of the stage, revealing the bare skin of her well-defined back through the slit in her dress.
"Yes, it is!" the emcee howled. "The contestant's breasts are simply so large that they can actually still be seen from behind, sticking out from her sides! Despite her attempt to conceal them, they are physically so imposing that they cannot possibly be hidden, no matter the angle! This gap moe is simply astounding! There can only be one word to describe these torpedoes: bakunyū— explosive breasts!"
With one simple move, Sakura had drawn the venue's attention to herself like a lightning rod. Desperate for a shot at winning, several kunoichi confident in their figures tried to imitate her pose, only to fail miserably. Nobody was interested in their flat behinds.
"And that concludes the first round!" the emcee declared. "In this stage, you all get to vote on who remains, so please proceed to the voting booths and choose your three favourite contestants!"
Sakura breathed a sigh of relief and lowered her pose as the curtain descended, separating the stage from the rest of the venue. There would be a short intermission between rounds, so the kunoichi all returned backstage, while Sakura hurried to the bathroom to touch up her make-up.