A dark room, lit from above by a dim fluorescent lightbulb. In the center of that room, a small table sat, along with a man whose features were... censored?
"Hello everyone! This is HappyVainGlory here. You can call me Happy though. No chapter update today because I'm hard at work making a stockpile for next week since I'll be traveling. So for today, I decided we'd have a short interview with our main character, Alex! Say hello, Alex!"
Alex blinked and looked around the room. "The hell? Where is this? No, where am I? Wait..." He looked at Happy and said, "...Are you Rob?"
"Nope!" Happy laughed and said, "I'm something similar, but that guy is someone you know."
"...Someone I know?" Alex blinked, parsing that information. Then he shook his head and said, "Wait, forget about that. Who are you and where am I?"
"Oh, I'm Happy."
"...To see me?"
"No, that's my name... Well, my 'alias', I guess?"
Alex narrowed his eyes.
Happy waved his hand and said, "Never mind that. This is all basically a dream for you anyway, so just relax a bit. In fact, if you have any questions, I can answer them for you. As a heads up, you won't remember anything when you go back though."
"...Alright, I'll bite." Alex leaned back in his chair and said, "First off... where are we?"
"Mm... in the abstract sense, we're in a metaphysical realm created by words. In the practical sense... we're in my interview room!"
Alex rubbed his face, looking like he had a lot to say. But he shook his head and said, "Fine. Let's just say that this is an interview room... You said you'd answer any question, right?"
Happy nodded. "Yep! Anything. I won't tell a single lie."
"Alright." Alex nodded. "Who am I, really?"
"Well..." Happy hummed and said, "You're definitely not me."
"Isn't that obvious?!"
Happy laughed and said, "Alright, alright. You're an author who suppressed his inner voice to pander to the masses. It worked since you have great skills, but you've always regretted it. Since that's the case, you have some lingering sentiments that you want to resolve."
Alex went quiet, mulling over the information. Then he slowly nodded and said, "Fine. Say that's true... then how did I get here? I'm not really 'Alexander Smith.' I know that now."
"That's right! You aren't Alexander Smith, but you definitely took on his identity. It's sufficient to say his life is yours now to do as you wish. He isn't you, but you are him... if that makes sense. And as to how you're here... Well. An old friend made a wish and it got granted? I'll just say that for now."
"...You are going to play coy with all these answers, aren't you?"
Happy laughed and glanced off to the side. "Well... can't break the fourth wall too much, can I?"
"Fourth wall?" Alex snorted. "What is this, Omniscient Reader's Viewpoint?"
"No. That's another story of mine."
"...Of yours? Wait, what the hell are you talking about?"
Happy laughed. "I meant, another fanfiction of mine is inspired by that... but another time, another place... You sure you want to waste your time asking those questions? There isn't much time left."
Alex's eyes widened. "What? But it's only been- No, whatever. Focus..." He took a deep breath and then nodded. "Alright. Then let's focus. Do you know the future?"
"Only a little."
Alex clicked his tongue. "Fine. Then answer me this. Will Eve die?"
"...Hm... Kind of?"
"It's a yes or no question, dammit!"
Happy laughed. "Well, it really isn't. After all, 'death' in these sorts of world isn't as clear cut as on Earth you know?"
"...I hate you already. You're worse than Rob."
"I get that a lot." Happy chuckled and said, "Shall I ask some questions then?"
"...Answer me this first." Alex stared with sharp green eyes and said, "...Will we get a happy ending?"
Happy let out a small smile. "Isn't that obvious?"
"...Fine. I guess that's enough." Alex sighed. "Alright. Ask your damned questions."
"First... do you love Eve?"
Alex turned a bright red. "The hell are you asking!?"
"Well, it's important to sort that part out. And what do you like about her?"
"Of course I love Eve..." Alex looked away and muttered, "She's sweet. Too sweet. And I always regretted writing her off. She... deserved better. Really."
Happy nodded. "I figured. Then... If you had to choose between yourself and Eve, who would you choose?"
"To live?"
"Yeah."
"Her, without a doubt. Why?"
Happy wrote something down. "Oh... no reason."
"...Wait a minute. You said you aren't Rob. But Rob said that the Gates aren't 'my' creation. Then are you the fu-!"
Alex suddenly vanished in a flash of golden light.
Happy pulled out a watch and said, "Would you look at the time." He tilted it and showed a watch without any numbers or features. "I'm out of it! See you guys! Thanks for reading! I promise I'll be back soon, so stay tuned! If you have any questions, feel free to leave them and I'll do a short Q+A again with a characters, or with myself if I don't have a chapter ready. Bye bye!"