This consists is a side story with side characters that don't directly influence the main story, you're free to read this or not.
This chapter happens between chapters VIII and IX between the characters 'Lowe' and 'Rainier' and this is an explicit chapter with sexual scenes and language.
I'm not the best at writing sex scenes, but the focus is more in their relationship development so I'm sorry about the lack of skill in the scene itself.
Thank you for reading and hope you enjoy the side stories as you enjoy the main one.
Song recommendation: ♫ Bunny Love - Stela Cole ♫
"Whisper to the night fairies your wish and they may grant it, whisper to me your love and I might drown you in it".
I might as well set my body on fire and die already, Rainier Bauldry thinks to himself as the cold night air brushes against his skin and his fingers interlace with another's cold as ice ones. He was always a hot-headed man, after all to be a knight for the Crown Prince and not succumb to the man's power is a prowess not many can withstand. Not only that but after years as an orphaned commoner he became the heir to a Dukedom, something like that isn't for the faint of heart, yet he thrived, earning the respect of those that questioned his father's decisions.
So one might expect him to be calm and collected, but he isn't such things, hot-headed and stubborn, a man that doesn't give up upon a love that'll never be reciprocated and proud of his loyalty to such hopeless love.
Even if he will never utter his feelings to his best friends, Rainier is more impulsive than he himself gave the credit for. At least he's seeing himself as such at the moment, he who never wavered at the face of Alkaios' harsh training or Evangelia's love gaze to another while his heart yearned for her, right now the same man is crossing the Palace garden hand-in-hand with a servant to go to his house to have sex.
The idea of being caught by others makes his red mana sweep through, a trail of roses blooming behind them, result of Rainier's specialty mana for healing. Most wouldn't expect such a thing from the Captain of the Silver Crows, but those that saw him at war know that the man healing prowess is just a new way to torture others in order to gather intel for the Crown Prince.
I should've said no, he thinks, going back to a few moments ago where he accepted the insane proposition of the servant he doesn't even know the name of. Sure the sight of his face makes him want to annoy the man, the reminder his presence gives him of the existence of the second Prince makes his blood boil in anger and the fact that the servant looks at him without a hint of fear, makes him want to pull him towards his own turmoil, just to see what reaction it'll come from it.
After walking so much, they reach Rainier's carriage, the mana-induced carriage is low, the wheels are made of rubber and the design is similar to what the protagonist of the main story would recall as the first cars were in his previous world. However here they just call it a carriage still, even if horses are substituted by mana stones. He enters the vehicle, awaiting the servant to enter through the other door by himself, after he does so, the man puts the coordinates of his home on the carriage device.
Rainier sighs, leaning back at the carriage's seat, his gaze on the servant, his hair was slicked back previously but now it's down and messy because of the wind, his sweet brown eyes are deep as he's gazing through the window, the black bags under it denounce his lack of sleep. I guess those that serve the second Prince also don't sleep much. The future Duke thinks, before finally speaking, breaking the silence that settled between them since they left the Palace.
"Are you sure you want to do this?" Differently from his usual tone of mockery, now the man is calm and his voice demonstrates pure worry. "Not only is this a crime, but we also already stated we don't even feel attracted to each other".
The servant turns from the window to him, his brown eyes staring at Rainier's red ones. "That only applies if those laws were really properly maintained", his answer is correct, after all, nobles aren't executed for sleeping with commoners and if they wish to marry them, they could just buy them a small title and land to make it possible. The law made by the third Emperor was to avoid commoners from being taken advantage of, and after it was stated the nobles just went from abusing commoners to abusing other species or halflings that weren't considered proper citizens, making them slaves. However, commoners can be executed for courting with nobles or sleeping with them, if Rainier wanted he could tell on the servant and get him killed, but he didn't and wouldn't, he had no reason to.
Aside from his two childhood friends, Evangelia and Alkaios, he had no deep relationship with others, no other friends and he saw his colleagues in the Silver Crows to be only his subordinates, never crossing the line. So when he provoked the servant that night a few days ago, he couldn't help but find it fun. Sometimes having someone you can hate freely can be quite liberating, especially when the other hates you back.
"And I'm not asking you to sleep with me with some kind of motive like attraction or love", the servant mumbles, turning back his gaze, his face still flushed from drinking, at least Rainier assumes so as the car fills with the smell of alcohol coming from the servant.
"Then what is? The true motive?" He asks, his gaze still on the servant even if he isn't looking back at him.
"Because both the Prince and my brother speak of a feeling I don't understand", he sighs, Rainier can see his eyes blinking slowly as he responds, his words dragging slowly, sluggish, almost as if he's getting drunk upon the night's breeze. "It's not like I don't want to be loved too, I love my brother that's for sure, but I don't think it's the same love they speak of, and it got me thinking…" he sighs again, his brown eyes now gazing at the future Duke. "What does it feel like to love someone that isn't family? What makes someone want to marry another?" Those words catch Rainier by surprise, he doesn't quite understand the servant's motivation, but he can't help but think about his own love.
Evangelia was six when they first met, at the Palace, he had just recently been adopted and she wasn't Alkaios fiance yet. He saw her standing next to her father, her black hair and eyes staring at the grown ups as if she naturally belonged there, with confidence and a determination worthy of a future Crown Princess, even if she wasn't even considered for the spot yet. He remembers his father introducing them, and they playing on the Palace gardens, running around, laughing without a care in the world. Rainier saw his relationship with Alkaios and Evangelia to be separate, they never talked about each other nor they played together, that is until he was ten and the two of them became engaged.
At first he didn't understand what that word meant or his own feelings, he just felt angry and displeased, as if someone was suddenly barging into his room without knocking. After a few years he understood what he truly felt, but it was already too late, he could see her eyes as she looked at the Prince, those eyes were the same he had every time he looked at her.
"And why sleeping with me would help with that?" He questions, after being deep in thought.
The servant gives him a tired smile, as if he's about to fall asleep. "Because most of the single people in the Empire find you attractive", a small laugh leaves the servant's lips. "And because I'm curious about what having sex feels like, I know a little about the theory behind it but I never actively researched it since I was never interested in having such relations".
A nonchalant attitude and tired expression, the servant attitude doesn't reflect the situation they're in, and again, even if Rainier is anxious about being seen by others, he can't really say that his attitude reflects the situation well either.
"Should I be flattered?" He asks, feeling more relaxed as the wind from the servant's window messes with his hair and lowers his usually warm body temperature and a small smile of amusement appears on his lips.
The servant laughs "I guess".
It took them ten minutes to arrive at Rainier's State, the mansion is smaller than the Palace, the garden is simple but filled with bushes of red roses, the fragrance filling the night air. The carriage stops at the front of the mansion, the lights are all out as the man instructed his servants to not wait for him to arrive. It's also easier to sneak in, he thinks as he leaves the vehicle, followed by the servant. They enter the place in silence, in the dark the mansion is quiet and the minimalist interior doesn't reflect the extravagant perception one usually has of Rainier. No pictures or paintings, only white walls and a few vases and plants, the stairs are made of white marble and the moonlight entering through the skylight almost gives the place a surreal and haunting feeling. A place that doesn't feel lived in, with no warmth whatsoever.
They go straight to Rainier's bedroom, they don't see any servant in their way, and no sound is heard besides their heartbeat and steps. And when they close the door of the room behind them a sigh of relief leaves both of their lips.
The future Duke's bedroom is weird to say the least, there are no windows and all the walls are covered with black paint, the decoration and furniture is also kept at the minimum and all is really dark. It's almost the exact opposite of the Prince's room, the servant thinks in surprise, the bedroom is sad, almost as if on purpose, as if it was his own torture chamber. "Do you want to take a shower?" Rainier asks, seeing the servant in his room makes the realization of what they're there to do even more daunting. The dark room is lit only by the weak lights next to his bed hiding the expression of the servant. The man wants to come closer to see it, but he stays in place close to the door.
"Sure" the answer was almost a whisper, but the silence between them allowed him to hear.
"Thats the door", Rainier points to a brown door on the other side of the room, next to his dresser, "The shower is similar to those of the Palace…" he stops for a moment, remembering that the man in front of him is a servant so he's not used to showers, only baths. "Do you know how it works?"
The servant nods. "I helped the Prince sometimes", he says simply, his tone is low and Rainier observes for the first time that his voice was more on the raspy side, coarse as if he was always struggling to speak.
"There's a robe in the drawer of the bathroom, you can use it", he says as he watches the servant walking towards the bathroom, due to the bad lighting he can only see his silhouette. "Take your time", his words don't mean much, he isn't nervous by the situation anymore as they weren't caught or even worried about the man, but he still tries to be as polite as he can.
After opening the bathroom's door, the white light sweeps the room, and before closing the door the servant pauses for a second, he seems to have sobered up a little yet his face was redder than before. "Hm… how should I… prepare myself?" The question grabs Rainier by surprise, his eyes open wide before he closes them again as he laughs, the whole situation is just… so bizarre, almost like a dream.
Cute.
Ah?
What?
He stops himself, as his face warms up again, he gazes at the man staring at him through the semi open door of the bathroom. His eyes resemble the tone of a caramel candy he used to eat as a child, and his expression is just calm, almost expressionless. If he wasn't so red, Rainier would think that he isn't bothered at all, but he seems to be hiding his emotions.
Even his ears are red, he observes before answering the servant who's looking at him mortified by his reaction. "I thought you knew what you were doing", he states with a smirk on his face. The servant's expression goes from mortified to annoyed.
"I said I did some research, doesn't mean I know it all", he says, his tone matching his expression. Just like a feisty puppy. "This is my first time, you know".
Rainier chuckles, "Same here, pup, should we stop because of it?"
The servant pauses for a moment. "No". And after a few more moments of silence he speaks again. "Do you have protection?" Another embarrassing question, but this time his face doesn't become red because of it.
"Yes, I got it as a gift for my twentieth birthday, Alkaios has a twisted sense of humor, you see", he's babbling. "He said I should at least get some if I was set on being single", he chuckles, remembering their prior conversation. How could someone who joked about his friend being single forever suggest he marry their brother? He doesn't really respect me as a fellow human, huh? Not that Rainier doesn't know that his best friend is a cold human with the mask of a kind one, obsession and power does that to someone. "So I have protection, yes, and as for the lubricant… I have some in the bathroom's drawer as well", his tone is tired, he wonders if he should keep talking as the servant remains silent. "It's closed, I never used it".
"We're both virgins, I understand", the servant's tone is calm, his eyes fixed on Rainier's, they stare at each other for a moment before the servant speaks again. "I'll do my best at cleaning and preparing myself up then", his words are embarrassing but he closes the door before Rainier can see if he got red because of it or not.
The sound of water running soon fills the room, he changes his clothes to a robe, staring himself at the mirror inside his closet. His red eyes are sunken from the lack of sleep, his hair is a mess from drying in the wind and his lips are chapped because of the dry weather. Nothing on him is attractive like the servant stated, sure, when he puts the costume of proper noble women come to him in flocks, and the maids whisper in the corridors about how the young master is good-looking for a previous commoner. And even if he's the most attractive man in the Empire after the Royal family, he'll never be attractive to her. His body isn't bad, after all he trained to be a knight since he was adopted, and his intelligence isn't even behind those who call themselves scholars, he graduated the Academy fifth in all classes. But Alkaios was first and Evangelia second. What's the worth of fifth place when you're competing with the first one and in love with the second?
A sigh leaves his chapped lips, he munches a piece of his cheek as he becomes too deep inside his own mind, but the wound heals almost instantanely due to his own mana, wondering what is he even doing there. Being confident in himself only until he looks forward and remembers he'll only ever be in the shadow of the second most powerful man of the Empire. When he becomes Emperor and I become Duke, what will become of our relationship? He wonders if he even wants to see such a future. But his wandering stops with the sound of the bathroom's door opening.
He leaves the closet, the scent of his soap fills the room and his eyes go to the man sitting on his bed. The bathroom's door is still open, illuminating the once dark room.
In the white light Rainier takes his time observing the servant carefully, the man is staring at the floor, his brownish hair is dripping wet, and the color reminds the future Duke of the color the firewood he used to gather with his birth parents when he was four, before they died. Looking at the man from afar makes him seem smaller than when he stands next to him, or maybe it's the posture he usually carries himself. When he saw the servant he almost thought he was a noble by his posture, but now watching him curved and staring at the floor, he looks like a child of the streets.
"What are you thinking about?" He asks, approaching the man, the servant raises his head, his caramel eyes show no emotion whatsoever, the water from his hair drips on the bed making Rainier grab the towel from the bathroom and toss at the man. "Dry your hair properly, shouldn't you be more worried about your health?"
The servant grabs the towel, drying his hair in silence, not answering back.
Rainier sits next to him on the bed, grabbing the towel to dry the servant's head. "You're too slow", he whispers, the texture of the towel on his hand feels ticklish. It takes him a while to finish drying the other's hair but they remain in silence. "Done", he says, going back to the bathroom to put the towel back and closing the door, the bedroom becoming dark again, the lights beside the bed being the only source of light. Then he lays on the bed again, his head on the pillow as he turns to look at the servant still silent. "If you want you can sleep and go back in the morning, you don't need to do this, pup."
The nickname makes the man look at him again, his previous emotionless caramel eyes are now filled with annoyance. That's better, he thinks with a faint smile.
"I'm not backing down", he says at last. "It's just that I didn't know".
"Know what?"
A pinkish tone takes over the servant's cheeks. "That touching there could feel good", he whispers, almost to himself, but the proximity with Rainier allows him to hear.
Silence befalls them again, they feel awkward, after all what are they even doing? Why are they there? This question keeps popping in their head since they left the Palace.
"What now?" Rainier asks, he very much would like to take the lead and pretend he knows what he's doing, but he doesn't, and the servant doesn't as well.
"Before we start… I would like to know what you want in return?" The question comes out of nowhere, he isn't even sure what the servant is talking about.
"In return to what?"
"Sex".
"What am I? A prostitute? If I ask you for money, do you think you can give me an amount satisfactory for the heir of a Dukedom?" He's half insulted and half annoyed, if the servant was going to ask him such a thing shouldn't he have offered it before?
"I was a bit drunk", yeah no shit I could smell the alcohol, Rainier thinks, becoming more annoyed. "So I made an impulsive decision. I don't want to back down, but I don't think it's fair to you due to the risks". His voice is calm and it's clear that he's the type that doesn't think there is such a thing as a free ride. "I can give you Litri".
"And what's that supposed to be?"
The servant lays next to him, his face a few centimeters away, his hand under his head brushing against the pillow. "A poison I made with my mana", his statement is calm, he doesn't seem worried about the consequences of the offer.
"Is that the poison the Prince gave Alkaios?" He asks, his red eyes showing hostility, but the servant doesn't flinch.
"No", he doesn't elaborate, he doesn't deny the claim or try to justify it, he simply states his answer, his eyes not wavering. "Litri is a poison you can't find anywhere else, I made it myself" his explanation is the first time he talks about himself to Rainier. "My affinity to poison also means that my mana can become poison itself", he turns to stare at the ceiling. "So I used my mana to concoct a poison. The effects vary, but Litri is definitely the strongest", he turns to stare at Rainier again, his hand touches the man's neck slightly. "At first it burns your throat as soon as you consume", then he trails through his skin, touching where his lungs are, his fingers burn through Rainier's skin without leaving a trace, his breath becoming unstable with the proximity, but the servant seems unaware. "Then your lungs start shutting down, it becomes hard to breathe and you feel your insides melt as your vision blurries, at the end you die after agonizing for a few moments. It's extremely painful, it takes seconds to start but ages to finish".
"You speak as if you have tested already", Rainier whispers, out of breath, his eyes staring at the servant without even blinking.
"I did", he says simply, not dwelling in the specifics. "But you don't need to know how".
"I don't need your poison".
"Do you want it, though?"
Silence again, how many times have they stared each other in the eyes in silence that night? For some reason it isn't uncomfortable, just awkward. Rainier doesn't answer, he leans over, getting closer to the servant.
"I'm going to ask again, do you really want to do this, pup?"
"Lowe", the servant whispers. "Call me by my name, not that ridiculous nickname".
Lowe.
L
O
W
E
His name rolls smoothly, it suits him.
"Whatever you say, pup", Rainier says with a smirk, receiving an annoyed expression in return, but he doesn't dwell on it too much since he closes the gap between them, touching Lowe's lips with his own.
It's both of their first kisses.
At first they only touch lips, the warmth from Lowe's breath brushing his skin and the rough feeling of Rainier's chapped lips is what they notice at first, their heart beating with anticipation as they awkwardly brush their lips together. I read somewhere that touching tongues feels good, the somewhere in question Lowe is thinking about is a romance book he gave his brother, not that he would admit reading it in secret. He opens his eyes, licking softly Rainier's lips, he watches as the man frowns, his red eyelashes fluttering as he parts his lips.
Their tongues meet inside their mouths, the feeling of the warmth fills their senses, they don't even realize they're holding their breath. Rainier pushes himself up, turning to be on top of Lowe, not parting their lips until he's facing the man. Their breath unstable, their faces flushed when their eyes met.
What is lust?
That was something Lowe questioned himself, for someone who never touched himself before that day, he didn't even know what an orgasm felt like. Sure, he read in books and knows how sex goes, but he never thought those terms and things had something to do with him. He was never really curious, he had other things in his mind. But with the small stability in his life right now, he found his mind wandering as he heard the conversation of other servants or even the occasional words of his brother.
Does love feel like lust? He wonders, looking at Rainier's eyes makes his body feel hot, their awkward kiss makes his heartbeat become unstable just like his breath. And most of all, his penis became erect, just like when he was preparing himself in the bathroom.
This must be lust. He thinks the realization makes him feel good. At first Rainier's body and face didn't really make Lowe feel anything but annoyance, but in this moment he feels something tingle in the depths of his stomach, just like when he thought about leaving the tower with his brother or when he saw Nikias' golden mana.
A burning feeling of desire.
Their lips clash again, their tongues dancing inside their mouths, they don't really speak, sounds leaving their mouths as Rainier's hands enter Lowe's robe, touching his bare skin. Not sure of what to do the man parts their lips, turning to kiss the servant's neck, their body heat becoming more similar the more he touches and kisses him. He was so cold to the touch, now he's warm, Rainier thinks, his lips trailing to Lowe's nipples, it's the same color as his hair, he thinks with a smirk before licking it, not sure of what he's doing, but the low gaps and moans of the man under him make him continue.
He plays with the man's nipples slowly, biting and licking softly as his other hand trails down his body, unraveling the robe and revealing the man's naked body. Rainier stops, leaning back to sit between Lowe's legs, which opens space for the man. He looks down at the servant's body, when he opened his shirt before in a lousy attempt to seduce him, Rainier thought the servant was being funny and that it was ridiculous the idea that he could even feel the slightest attraction to that body.
But now looking at it in the half-lit room he sees he was being hasty with his thoughts. Sure, normally he wouldn't be attracted to him, even if he never thought about his attraction tendencies and he only touched himself thinking about his unrequited love, he can't deny that Lowe's body was making him hard right now.
His skin is pale compared to Rainier's tanned one, and even if their height is similar, the man is smaller, since his muscles are almost non-existent in comparison to Rainier's, who was always training, his skin is soft and he looks like a scholar who never touched a sword in his life, he thinks, his eyes scanning every corner of the man's body, but at last he is drawn to his caramel eyes and the mole under his right eye which he noticed the first time they met.
Rainier pulls Lowe's legs up, leaning his face towards it, kissing his skin trailing it with kisses until he reaches the man's lower region. His eyes focused on Lowe's and how he flinches with every kiss, his face becoming ever redder together with his chest and ears.
"You look like a tomato", he comments, his hand rubbing on Lowe's skin, low moans leaving the servant's lips.
"Your head is like a tomato", he rebuttals, making Rainier laugh.
"I guess" he says, licking Lowe's inner thigh, another moan, he needs to admit that it feels good making someone else flinch and make those sounds with nothing but his touch, his warmth. Rainier's eyes go from Lowe's face to his dick, completely erect in front of his face, he never thought that he would feel the urge to touch something that belongs to someone else so much. His hand touches the twitching muscle, the pre-cum leaking through the tip, he strokes it slowly, gasps leaving Lowe's mouth due to the pleasure. "How does it feel?" Rainier asks, his mouth dry and his eyes glistening with lust at the sight of the man under him.
"Good", the servant answers between moans, his tone is clear and his voice doesn't waver, hard to believe that he was twitching with pleasure.
While one of his hands strokes Lowe's cock, the other softly touches the man's hole, he can feel the wet and sticky feeling of the lubricant he must've used in the bathroom, his finger sliding inside easily. Even if he himself feels his own cock twitching in pain from the lack of stimuli, Rainier is more than satisfied, watching his every move cause a reaction, listening to the moans that fill the once silent room almost like shoving color in a deprived canvas.
Sweat starts dripping through his forehead as he inserts another finger inside the man, feeling his insides slowly, almost playing with it calmly. As if he has all the time in the world to find out where the man feels good. His breath becoming more and more unstable, he can feel his own cock leaking with the sight.
Lowe isn't sure if the future Duke is playing with him on purpose, he's stroking his cock slowly but his fingers move swiftly and strongly inside him. Sure, he already stated to himself that he could feel good through his ass when he was preparing in the bathroom, but the comparison of his own fingers to Rainier's ones is almost laughable, not only the thickness was different, but the rough feeling of the man's calluses adds another sensation on top of it. His whole body becomes engulfed in pleasure, he can feel the static traveling through his body as it builds up, he can't keep his mouth closed and there are tears in his eyes, he never shed tears from nothing but sadness before, it sure is a new feeling.
Rainier stops, removing his fingers from inside Lowe, who whimpers in response, feeling weak, his tearful caramel eyes meeting his red ones. If someone asks him now what lust looks like he wouldn't need to look at the dictionary again, he could just recall those eyes.
Red like the burning sunset, pleading for more, eyes that consume you whole.
In contrast, to Rainier, if someone asked him what lust looks like, he would recall Lowe's eyes instead.
Dripping sweetness, like tasting caramel as a child, eyes that beg you to drown in its taste.
The man lowers his face, his lips kissing over Lowe's salty tears, until he reaches his lips again, the kiss is more calm, almost as if they're savoring each other's taste. When they separate, saliva connects their tongues as they stare deep into each other's eyes, something they would probably go back and say it's their favorite pastime together.
Staring into each other's soul, stripping it bare.
Rainier's robe slides off his skin as he unravels it, eyes focused on the servant who's watching him with expectant eyes, to make sure of the other's pleasure the man gets up, going to the bathroom to get more lubricant to find the bottle half empty. He chuckles as he returns to the room. "Did you eat half of the bottle with your ass?" His question is crude but his tone is playful, almost sweet.
"I wasn't sure how much I should use", the servant answers, embarrassed as he watches Rainier grabbing the condom from the drawer next to the bed, he rips the package carefully and struggles for a few moments to put it on his hard cock. Lowe watches it with observant eyes. He's bigger than me, but it isn't as thick as a lotion bottle or lengthened like a rolling pin like that book suggested, he thinks, feeling relieved as he wasn't sure how it would fit before, but now it seems more believable. The book in question was an erotica he read at the Palace library as he was researching the Royal family tree for the Prince. Who would've thought that they would categorize such a book wrong? He thinks, recalling how surprised he was, yet he read the whole thing, curious about it, not that reading about how women and men have sex helped much with his current situation as neither of them are women.
Cold, Rainier thinks as he spreads the lotion over the condom on his cock, his eyes focused but his brain isn't all up there anymore, he isn't even thinking properly as the blood rushes through his body towards his hard erection. He positions himself back on the bed, his cock lingering on the entrance of Lowe's hole, even if they're both twitching with anticipation, he stops himself, looking at the man again. "You can still back down", he knows that he would suffer from pain if he stopped, his whole body is screaming at him to just put it in, and his eyes reflect that, he wants to make Lowe cry even more, he wants to hear his whimper under him, he wants to taste his soft skin under his teeth as he buries himself in his sweetness. But he can't shake off the idea that the man might regret and want to stop, after all they're both having their first time with someone they don't love or even feel attracted to.
Can I even say I don't feel attraction anymore? Rainier wonders if in the morning he'll go back to only looking at the servant with loathing and annoyance. Maybe it's the situation that brings up the lust from our subconscious, but I still want it. He reflects, because right now everything about the servant looks so tempting.
Lowe looks at the man incredulously, how can someone struggling to breathe, with his cock pulsing on his hand, looking at him with eyes that devour him whole, be controlling himself back to ask again for consent. Not sure if the man is stupid, foolish or considerate, he answers with a chuckle, opening his legs further, giving the man a full view of him. "Just start fucking me already", crudeness he usually avoids to spit left his lips way too easily, but the man above him doesn't seem to judge him or even be bothered by the words, contrary, it seems to instigate him further.
"Fuck" Rainier whispers under his heavy breathing as he pushes himself inside Lowe, the feeling of tightness and warmth enveloping him as he slowly pushes further and further in, the sound of the man's heavy breathing under him, his eyes closed and lips parted, as to fully feel this moment. It feels surreal, out of this world, he needs to hold himself to not cum when he manages to push his full length inside.
A soft moan followed by a whimper, Lowe can't avoid the sounds he lets out, tears flowing non stop, he slowly opens his eyes to look at Rainier when he stops, sweat dripping from his face on Lowe's, he's right above him, staring deeply into his eyes, shivers run through both of their spines.
"Can I move? Does it hurt?" Rainier asks, wincing and moaning when his cock twitches inside Lowe.
It would be a lie if he said it doesn't hurt, but he doesn't want to stop, the preparation he made and Rainier's fingers before helped him stretch a lot, but his thickness was still different from mere fingers, making it hard to breathe as he inserted. "A little, but you can move slowly" he answers with sincerity. Rainier nods, burying his head on Lowe's neck, their bodies wet from the warmth they're emanating.
Of course if someone else was in the same situation it would hurt a lot, it not only was their first time but even if Rainier isn't as big as the fictional character from the erotica Lowe read, he was quite above average. However, unbeknownst to them, Rainier's mana was leaking through his body, unable to contain itself due to his intense feelings of lust and desire. And such mana enters Lowe's body, healing him of any pain or tear that would happen in one's first time.
So he moves, slowly, back and forth, in and out, their brains stop working for the first time that night, not a single thought crossing their mind, Lowe puts his arms over Rainier's neck, his nails digging through his skin as the pleasure washes over him.
"It feels so good", he says while moaning, he can feel Rainier's short breath on his neck and his mouth on his shoulder biting his skin as he whimpers. The man licks the marks of his teeth on Lowe's skin before sucking and licking other parts of the man's neck and shoulders, brushing his lips on his ears, making the servant shiver with his first orgasm.
Lowe's eyes flicker as they roll back, his back arching and his insides gripping onto Rainier's cock, making the man moan along with curses. His first orgasm in the bathroom wasn't like this, it felt good, sure, but nothing like this, he was seeing stars, his vision blurry.
"Pup, you're going to break my cock", Rainier whispers in Lowe's ear, their moans are muddled together, they can't identify anymore which belongs to whom. He licks Lowe's earlobe before placing his lips against the man's again, the taste of blood fills his mouth, his tongue searches inside the man's to find a dent on his cheek, licking it pouring mana making the wound close. "Don't hurt yourself, you can bite me if you want", he says leaning back, moving deeper inside the man and placing his fingers on his mouth.
Lowe stares at him, opening his mouth to taste Rainier's fingers, the feeling of the rough skin against his tongue makes him shiver, a muffled moan followed by a whimper leave his mouth as he gets hard again. Rainier places another finger on his mouth, pressing down, opening up his mouth, making Lowe grab the messy sheets tightly on his hand, the knuckles of his hand turning white.
"Shit, pup, this feels good", he moans, picking up the pace as he plummets himself deeper inside the other. His eyes dark with desire as his fingers play with Lowe's tongue inside his mouth.
More tears flow down Lowe's cheeks as Rainier finally presses his sweet spot, he closes his eyes, biting hard on the man's fingers, his back arching again, almost as if his own body is begging for more. By cue, Rainier takes his hand from Lowe's mouth, grabbing his hips to pull him closer, hitting the same spot again and again, enjoying the sounds leaving the servant's lips like the god's nectar.
And just as sweet as nectar and caramel, Lowe finally succumbs to the feelings of pleasure. "Rainier" he whimpers as he feels another climax arriving, he doesn't even need the help of the man to move his hips, trying to feel more.
And in contrast, hearing his name coming from the lips of someone he certainly doesn't love nor likes shouldn't bring a man on the verge of his own ruin, but it does. The sound of their skin clashing becomes louder as they both approach their climax.
"Say it again", Rainier begs, his moans even louder than Lowe's, he feels it building from the back of his stomach, ready to burst. "Pup, say my name again", he begs again, his hands gripping tightly on Lowe's skin leaving marks, but neither notice it too busy feeling the pleasure of their bodies.
Lowe stares deeply into Rainier's eyes, his hand wavering over his own mouth, trying to stop his loud whimpers, his tears muddle his vision, but he can feel the red eyes staring down at him.
"Rainier", he says together with a whimper too loud for any of their good as he feels the pulsing cock inside of him, the warmth filling him inside as he himself flinches with the pleasure of his own orgasm.
One of the books Lowe read at the magician's tower had a very interesting way to describe mana leakage, and this moment reminds him of that.
Mana leakage by definition is when one's body can't hold the surge of mana inside, leaking it through the body's pores and causing it to sweep through the outside. The leakage is like sweat on a hot day with no shadow in sight. You can try to stop it with a towel or water, but it still comes through regardless. One can have surgery to close the glands and avoid the sweat, but in the case of mana, even if you close the openings, it'll always find a way to come out.
The only way to avoid it is to always keep your emotions in check, however that would only be possible if you abdicate all types of pleasures of life, and if you do so, then why would you still live it?
The book went on about all types of emotions and the effects on mana leakage, especially when experiencing deep desire or passion. In the tower, they went through surgery to close the mana pores and the experiments were obligated to go through training to dull their senses and emotions. Raphael suffered a lot because of it, he was always the more sensitive of the twins, but Lowe was the top of the "class", he never wavered even through torture. He had feelings, of course, but he was always good at hiding them, especially the boiling anger he felt everyday inside that damp and dark tower.
Even if Lowe tries to shut himself up and say that Raphael is the only one who still has trauma, he can't avoid the automatic responses he still has, of keeping a poker face and constantly being in control of his mana to avoid the leakage.
After all, if he leaked, those around him wouldn't survive. The results of the experiments on his body and his affinity to poison not only helped him to develop strong poisons and study them by consuming them, but also made his own mana become pure poison.
When Rainier asked about the poison he couldn't say, after all the poison the Crown Prince was being fed wasn't poison by itself but Lowe's own contaminated blood diluted with tea. How could he say he fed the Crown Prince his own blood?
However, the reason Lowe is thinking about this excerpt right now is because for the first time since he was eight years old, he is suffering from mana leakage. His nose begins to bleed and a thick black fog surrounds them together with his own orgasm, it all happens way too fast for him to even react. But contrary to the obvious outcome of spreading poison, nothing happens, well, sure, Rainier's nose starts to bleed as well and his breath becomes even heavier, but he doesn't have convulsions or drop dead.
"I'm sorry", Lowe whispers, his voice hoarse from the moans, his eyes tearing up again, this time out of fear, not fear of the man in front of him but of himself. A fear he shoved inside long ago.
Rainier cleans the blood under his nose with the back of his hand before pushing his wet red hair back, staring down at Lowe in silence. He can feel what the man was saying, his body experiencing pure pain, as if his organs are melting and regrowing again. The nature of his own mana acting on his behalf. But this pain is nothing like being stabbed forty times, losing two fingers or being stomped by a horse. Actually it felt even a little ticklish. He observes the expression of the servant for a while before lowering himself to face him, their noses brushing against each other's. "Lowe", it's the first time he called him by his name instead of the crude nickname. And as he expected his name rolled down his tongue so smoothly like the tastiest of alcohols. "I'm fine", he says before kissing the man again.
"Does it hurt?" This time Lowe is the one asking, making the other man laugh as he gets out of bed. He watches as Rainier takes off the condom and opens his drawer to get another one.
"I'm immune to most poisons" he says nonchalantly, "You can do your worst", he says with a smile, and even if the situation is far from sexy or inciting, he's still rock hard just from seeing Lowe laying there, his stomach drenched in his own cum. "I'll do my best to do the same", he states, putting the new condom on.
Lowe laughs. "I'll try".
Rainier doesn't ask if the man wants to go for another round, he doesn't have to as he moves on his own to turn his back to him, arching his back and putting up his hips, his face buried on the pillow, waiting.
And just like that, they go for their second round. Time clocking around them unnoticed as they drown themselves in pleasure, occasionally exchanging a few words, most of them were curses and pleas. Sleep was a thought at the back of their mind, shoved away by the pleasure, and when they came to themselves they were having a fourth round in the shower. Warm water and steam surrounded them as a mix of black and red fog taking over the bathroom and bedroom, not that they were worried by such as they were entangled so closely that all they could notice was their eyes and warm skin brushing against each other's.
When the fog made of their mana dissipates slowly, they finally stop after their sixth round on the wet bed, not because of their own will but the sound of a knock on Rainier's door.
"Sir, Lady Evangelia came looking for you", and those words snapped both of them out of it.
Rainier is the first to back off, something inside his brain snaps as he hears Evangelia's name, he feels guilt filling his heart and a pang on his stomach making him feel sick. His first reaction was to run to the bathroom to throw up.
Lowe is left at the bed, feeling bewildered and also sick, contrary to the reason of the future Duke, he felt something akin to disgust, not at himself but at the man that just threw up after having sex with him all night. He watches as Rainier cleans himself and dresses as if there wasn't someone else inside his room, the urge of cursing at the man or even using a spell to hurt him is stopped when their eyes meet.
"I'm sorry, it's not your fault", Rainier sighs, he brushes his hair back with his fingers, trying to make sense of his own reaction. "It was… good, I just suddenly didn't feel well".
"Maybe it's the poison", Lowe says, fighting his urge to cry, the trauma he refused to remember attempting to resurface.
But Rainier shakes his head and approaches him, brushing his finger under Lowe's right eye, where his beauty mark is. "No, it's not you." He reinforced it with a weak smile. "Let's not do this again, I hope your next time is with someone that loves you", his words feel more like poison than Lowe's mana.
"How can I when I don't know what love is", his answer is cold and his eyes, which before showed weakness, now show nothing. Rainier's eyes that before were deep with desire now showed pity.
"You can shower before leaving, be careful to not be spotted, I'll ask for a discreet servant to drive you back to the Palace", his words draw the line they were close to crossing before.
Lowe nods, before leaving Rainier leans on for one last kiss, a kiss that tasted like a poisoned apple, sweet and bitter, for them both.