[Problem in the kitchen]
Steam. Smoke. Fire. Screaming. Somehow, it all started with good intentions.
[Grey]: Alright, team. Let's cook dinner. Simple, human, peaceful. No magic, no explosions, no—"
A loud BOOM! interrupted her.
[Rimuru]: It wasn't me this time!
The house was already a warzone. Maple was trying to make soup but had accidentally solidified it into a cube. It was rolling across the floor like a boulder.
[Maple]: I think I invented soup that fights back!
Meanwhile, Klee had deep-fried something glowing blue.
[Grey]: Who deep-fried Rimuru? Where is the chicken?!
[Rimuru]: I'm fine! But I think I'm crispy!
Ammar was chasing a live rabbit around the room, except the rabbit was now breathing fire.
[Ammar]: Who enchanted the meat again?! It's learning!
A sudden shriek:
[Doctor]: HELP! THE CHICKEN IS MARRYING ME!
Grey spun. Indeed, a massive flaming chicken in a tuxedo was proposing to the poor doctor while violins played from somewhere.
[Yuri]: I didn't even cast anything! It just—started feeling romantic!
[Grey]: You made it sentient.
[Doctor]: AND POLYGAMOUS!
Mitsuha ducked as the cube-soup exploded, showering everyone in solidified broth.
[Mitsuha]: Is soup supposed to have a blast radius?!
Grey just sighed, hair sizzling slightly from the ambient heat of chaos.
[Grey]: Alright, new rule. Nobody cooks. Ever. Again.
The entire house paused—then something growled. The flaming rabbit had mutated.
[System]: Warning: Local Fauna has evolved into Boss-Class Creature: 'Rabtor the Fiery Bride Guardian.'
Grey grabbing her ladle like a sword
[Grey]: …Dinner's cancelled. Boss raid instead.
Grey was in full combat stance, wielding a glowing ladle like a divine weapon while facing off against a six-foot-tall flaming rabbit in armor. The rabbit—Rabtor the Fiery Bride Guardian—was dual-wielding frying pans and screeching wedding vows in Orcish.
[Grey]: I swear if one more living thing in this kitchen proposes to anyone, I'm frying myself next!
The ground exploded. Broth. Feathers. Chaos.
Then—
A portal opened in the middle of the kitchen.
Three familiar figures stepped out: Loiten, Reefer, and Bit Bob Collen.
[Loiten]: —uh, Dad? We came to visi—WHAT THE ACTUAL VOID!?
The rabbit launched a flaming frying pan that narrowly missed Loiten's head.
[Reefer]: Why is our dad fighting a rabbit on fire?
[Bit Bob]: I think it's a raid boss.
Grey deflected a pan strike, sparks flying.
[Grey]: It's dinner! Dinner decided to fight back!
The flaming rabbit roared, leaping into the air. Grey countered with a spinning ladle strike that sent soup waves crashing across the house.
[Klee]: Klee thinks Grey cooking is scary.
[Doctor]: YOU THINK?!
The kids stared, utterly horrified yet weirdly proud.
[Loiten]: So… this is what you do while we're at school?
Grey breathing heavily, covered in steam and chicken feathers
[Grey]: No. This is me trying to cook dinner!
The tent suddenly went quiet as the flaming rabbit fell to the ground, perfectly roasted.
[System]: Boss Defeated! You have created: Divine Roast of Rabtor. World Achievement Unlocked: The Family Dinner That Shouldn't Have Been.
Everyone just… stared.
[Reefer]: …I'm not eating that.
[Bit Bob]: I kinda want to.
[Loiten]: I'm vegetarian now.
Grey dropped the ladle, smoke rising off her head.
[Grey]: Welcome home, kids. Dinner's ready.
[Chapter End]
[Note: Sorry for the delay but I was busy with work and overtime and have no time for a full chapter]