I am doomed!
This is the only think that I could think at that moment. Yes, the moment when I was pretty damn sure that this job of mine...this freakin' job of mine is going out of my hands.
No. I just don't want to loose it. Not again.
Come to think of it, I think I am a professional loser at sticking to one job.
"Mia", I looked up from where the voice came. It was my colleague, " Boss's looking for you"
"hmm, I'm coming" I said while nodding. The calmness in my voice was enough to make others wonder whether I was being called upon the blunder I did or I was getting a promotion.
"It's okay Mia. Totally fine it is. All you have to do is go and own what you did?" I assured myself and stood up, brushed the dust off my black pants, that wasn't even there actually and took a deep breath.
Yes, now I was ready to loose my job. I mean, go to the boss's office.
***
My life was never stable. But right now, nothing was more unstable than my boss. I meant his mental stability. Well, that is what I did. you know, I am this talented to make others lose their mind, soul and energy. I will suck all your stamina like a vampire would suck all you blood and leave you disheveled. Is that the right phrase? Well, who cares. It's not like a vampire will kill me for that.
It wasn't like I was wrong. I was just not ready to please his client by posting a fake article about them.
***
"WHATT???? YOU LOST YOUR JOB? " the girl in front of me, who happened to be my only friend, Laura shouted as if it was happening for the very first time.
" Yeah. Go on. Be more louder" I taunted at how loud she was that made her café customers to stare at us.
"What? You lost your job? Again?"
This time she whispered.
"Oh God! Like should I say it again or something? Don't act like it's for the first time." I said while being all chill and drinking my coffee. Laura seemed like she was the one who lost her job.
"But Mia, why? Wasn't it your dream job?" Laura was now actually worried.
Oh God! This girl.
"I know!" I paused, " but seriously Laura, you know me. I can tolerate anything but writing something that is not even there, I cannot."
"But didn't you said it yourself that spices are a part of magazines and you have to add them in order to stay strong?"
"Yes, I said it. But, Laura, think about it. The amount of misinformation they were trying to be written was just too much. A community trust us. "
"When the owners don't bother, then why do you?"
"I know they don't care. All they care about is amount of advertisements they are getting."
I sipped my coffee while looking at a young girl who was studying with all her notes out and stuff. Ahh, Deja vu. This is how I used to study like crazy while studying journalism and look what it lead me to. A jobless person.
"I just cannot let anyone question my credibility."
"You have to be flexible in this game, Mia."
"You have to abide by your rules."
"It won't get you anywhere."
"At least I will stay clean in my own eyes though", I didn't wanted to sound like that, but at that moment, I sounded way broken than a shattered glass.
Taking a deep breath, I smiled. A shattered one.
I lost...again.
***
After having a cup of coffee, I went to my apartment. And before entering, I didn't forget to take the notice of the paper being attached to my door. It was the notice that as I had not paid the electricity bill for straight three months, they are cutting it. Good Wow. Hello darkness. Although there was still some light coming in from the windows of my living room, still it was way quite. Quieter than my failure.
Before moving on to this up until now depressing story of mine, let me introduce myself.
Hi there, I am Mia Ethan. Mia means "mine". so basically, I was mine. probably that is why I was single up until now. I am twenty seven by the way. University's top student who graduated with the degree of journalism and who wished to be one of the greatest and most influencing journalist in the world, had lost her eleventh job today. It wasn't like there was a problem in how I worked or how competitive I was.
All it had to do was with my rules and regulations that I had set before applying to any of the jobs. Staying clean, was one of the most difficult task that could ever be done in this field.
Well not only this one, but any of them. It is hard. Harder than I imagined.
I was known to be very positive person. A person who never gave up and never lost hope or her zeal. But maybe, I am getting old or something that now, I was getting tired. People of my batch were doing amazing in their fields and all. And here I was, hardly making ends meet. I had been doing a part time as well.
Ah, guess it was all charm. Not all dreams are meant to be true. I don't know why was I getting depressed but it hurts. To be right but still lose.
I guess this is what I am. A loser. maybe I should move on from this bogus dream of mine.
While thinking all that, I was staring at my own framed picture that was of my graduation ceremony where I was receiving my excellence certificate. Something broke. My dreams!
(to be continued...)