READING GUIDANCE
" This is a direct sentence in the present time."
" This is a direct sentence in the past time."
' This is a character's inner thought in the present time.'
' This is a character's inner thought in the past time.'
[ This is a direct sentence in sign language in the present time.]
[ This is a direct sentence in sign language in the past time.]
HAPPY READING!
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Do you ever think or even realize how many times in one day you spend taking a look at the magnificent sky in this hectic world, even if only for a few seconds?
The beauty of the sky that is splendidly there above you, with many different colors that look like they are telling a story.
.
It can be a clear blue sky without anything on it, or sometimes a warm orange and purplish color. Then, at other times, it becomes the most reddish sky — so bright it feels blinding. Yet, in her hectic previous life... how many times in a day did she spend simply looking at the beauty of the sky?
Because as she remembered, the second she woke up in her exhausted body, the only thing she cared about was her smartphone that contained everything she needed to do. Every day was always a very busy day in her life. Even she did not remember the last time she had a proper breakfast.
'I didn't think I had time,' she thought.
But,
No.
It was more likely that she chose not to have any time. She was so immersed in her tight schedule that she never had a chance to even realize a single beauty the world had given her. Her ambition and her pride were so damned high that she could not give herself even a little break. Life used to feel so miserable, even for a second.
Then, that is why she wonders... how could she survive in this world that she knew nothing about?
[Eat well, okay?]
While sitting at the wooden dinner table with her little sister in front of her, she said in sign language.
"Okay!"
And the lovely little sister, with her chubby reddish cheeks, enjoyed the bread and onion soup that she made.
[Do you want more?]
Her sister smiled. "Yes!" she said, without any sign language, yet somehow, Irisha could understand her emotion. The enjoyment made Irisha feel so much happier just by looking at her sister. Just by looking at her... Irisha felt that everything was in the right place.
.
.
She knew nothing about this world. That was something — and is something — that still concerned her after she decided to keep living. She was only ten years old, with her baby sister who had just been born. What could you expect from a child and a baby living alone in the forest like this? Moreover, to make the condition even worse, she was deaf and mute.
Yet, even though each day was harsh and hard, she did not understand why she was still moving forward. In this poor child's body, how could she still move and do housework just to make sure that their life kept going?
Even without any knowledge of this world, she dared herself to keep living. She started by exploring her house, which she knew nothing about. She tended a garden she had never cared for before, cooked meals with ingredients she was not familiar with, and tried to understand things using only a few poor books and Irisha's memories.
Every day was hard, especially when she had to take care of her baby sister while she herself was in such a condition. She had to constantly watch her baby sister so she could prevent anything wrong from happening, relying only on sight by reading her baby sister's face all the time. Even when she did something outside the house, she had to lay her baby sister down near her body so she could keep watching her and make sure she was alright, because her sight was the only thing she could rely on at that time.
It was hard. It was really hard. Every day, she tried her best to find something to eat while holding her baby sister in her ten-year-old body. She tried her best to make a fire so they would not freeze to death. She would fall asleep in terrible condition and had to wake up at the slightest movement of the baby, because she was too concerned and anxious that something might happen while she could not hear or say anything.
Even so, she would still wake up the next morning and do the same thing all over again. But whenever her baby sister laughed... her tiredness seemed to puff away like magic. The warm feeling of her baby sister in her embrace. The tiny hands holding her tightly. The sincere smile looking at her.
Just like magic... every hardship she had faced felt like nothing.
It was something she had never felt before.
Something that kept her moving. The simple thought that felt so magical:
'I will protect you, and I will always be with you.'
***
.
.
Her sister's name is Arisha Spes. She is now eight years old, so it means she has lived for almost eight years in this world that, still, she knows nothing about. Well, in her situation — as a deaf and mute person in a world that is not too friendly toward someone disabled like her — it is a really hard life. People here do not seem familiar with how to treat someone like her, so she has to do everything twice as hard as it should be.
"I already packed all the loaves of bread, Sister," Arisha said while using sign language with her hands.
Arisha is so good at it, and it is really easy to have conversations with her now. In this world — or to be more specific, in the place where she lives — people do not know sign language at all. In fact, sign language seems to have never existed in the first place. But as someone who is now disabled, she has to do something about it, right? So that is why she modified the sign language she had known from her previous life and mixed it with the language here to help herself.
It was hard, and at the start, she only chose words that were important for daily life. But somehow, as time went by — without her even realizing it — she is now able to have full conversations in sign language just like now.
[Good, shall we go then?] she asked. [The weather is kind of hot, put your hat on.]
"Okay! I already have the note. Where should we go first?"
[Hmm, let's choose households that are definitely at home.]
"Uncle Jacob and Aunt Marsha's household will be out in the morning. Let's go to the priest first."
... and she smiles.
[It will do. Let's go.]
They then leave their humble house, which now already has good fences surrounding it. Some villagers did help them build it... and yes, somehow, someone like her — who once thought people were terrifying — ended up receiving much help from them unexpectedly.
At first, she was still skeptical about humans in general. It could be because of her previous life's trauma, or... maybe she simply thought it would be really hard to ask for help from the villagers. Especially when she had to go down to the village to sell and buy necessities. The stares of the villagers were so terrifying, and walking there felt like they could stab her at any second.
Her condition — being unable to hear and speak — made their image in her imagination even worse. She thought she was being taken advantage of by the people who bought her goods. She thought they were mocking her whenever she could not see their eyes. Every time their expressions changed, she thought they were mad at her. It was always a horrifying moment whenever she had to go to the village, and every time someone came to her house, she thought they were trying to do something bad to her. The only thing she could think of was to run and lock herself inside her house because there was nothing she could do to fight them.
So yes, she lived in fear of them for quite a long time, and yes, she did everything she could to avoid them as much as possible.
... but there was a time that changed all of her perspective about how she saw humans.
Even though she tried to take care of her baby sister correctly and most safely, there was a time when the baby had an uncontrollable seizure. Arisha's body heated up, and she turned pale and blue. Irisha tried everything she could, but Arisha still did not show any good signs.
In that situation, she thought:
'I need help. I need someone's help!'
Just like that, she stepped out of her safe zone without even thinking twice. She wrapped her baby sister in thick clothes, even though the rain was pouring heavily outside. The pathway in the forest was bad in that kind of weather, but there was nothing she could think about other than seeking help.
So she walked, ran — carefully, yet unable to shake the anxiety that filled her while thinking about her sister's condition. It was torturing, but it kept her moving — until somehow she could see a glimpse of the village lights.
She knocked on the door of the first house she could find in the middle of the dark night. With her body wet and while holding her baby sister, she looked at the woman staring at her.
'Please help me! Please help my sister!'
She screamed so hard, hoping the woman could understand her... but the only sound that came out of her mouth was nonsense.
The woman looked at her strangely and spoke to Irisha, but she could not understand anything. At that moment, when the woman's expression changed, she believed she would be kicked out, and the woman did close the door. Her heart ached as she looked at the closed door.
... but while tears streamed down her face in the middle of the pouring rain, she thought:
'I should find another house. Maybe someone will help me.'
Because if she did nothing, her sister would be—
"Come with me."
Suddenly, the door opened again, and the woman grabbed her. There were other people behind her, and as soon as the woman picked up her sister, a man held Irisha up.
She could not hear anything, so she could not understand them. But in the middle of the rain, while wearing plastic raincoats, they ran through the night. They used their lanterns to guide them to another house and knocked on the door until it opened.
Again, Irisha could not hear or understand anything, but after a quick conversation, a young lady from that house led them inside and cleared the dinner table so they could lay Arisha down. An older man came to check her. They did something to her, and Irisha — still being held by a stranger — looked at her sister anxiously. She could not look at anything except Arisha. Her tears would not stop. They flowed like a river.
But when Arisha somehow calmed down and the seizures stopped, the lady from the first house smiled at her.
"Your sister is alright."
A truly sincere smile — just like the stranger lady on the last day of her previous life. A sincere smile that made her cry even harder out of gratitude as she understood what had been said to her.
"Deng... kyu..."
Unconsciously, she spoke while using sign language.
What she did made everyone stop what they were doing. They saw a ten-year-old little girl expressing gratitude just because they helped her baby sister — without even realizing that she herself, covered in mud and soaked with rain, was not in good condition either.
... and at that moment, they were deeply touched.
.
.
After that, Irisha fell sick too, and the family where Arisha was treated volunteered to take care of both of them. They looked after her for several days. When she became healthier, they refused to let them go back to their house in the forest immediately. The man who worked as a doctor in the village helped her design a more structured sign language system after realizing that Irisha was communicating with her hands. Just like "thank you," she also said "sorry," "food," and other important words with her hands. After realizing that, the doctor decided to help her.
"Pope!" said Arisha while running toward an old man who was about to enter his house.
The old man opened his arms and hugged her. "My lovely Arisha, you are early today," he said. He was Pope Joseph — the one who treated Arisha back then.
"Irisha and Arisha came?" asked a young lady coming from the open door with an apron, smiling at her. She was Anna, the lady who also helped her that night. "You are early, aren't you?" she asked while using sign language.
[Yes, we have many loaves of bread to deliver.] she said while taking out two loaves of bread. [Here you go!]
"Ah, your bread is always soft and nice. Thank you," she said. "Why don't you join us for breakfast?"
"Ya, ya, join us. Just prepare some for them too," said Pope Joseph.
"No, thank you! My sister and I have work to do!" Arisha said confidently while showing off her bag of bread.
Pope Joseph adjusted his glasses and became grumpy. "Humph, you are so busy. Then have dinner before you go back home," he said. "I don't understand why you two don't just live with us here."
"I like our house!" she said. "But I will have dinner here. Sister Anna's fish soup is the best."
"Aww, you are so cute. Should I make fish soup for dinner?" Anna asked while kneeling to hug Arisha.
"I will get some fish then," said Pope Joseph with a grumpy face, before looking at Irisha. "Come here for dinner," he signed.
... and she just smiled, because no one could refuse Pope Joseph.
[We will. Who could refuse the deliciousness of Sister Anna's soup?]
"Right?" said Arisha.
After that, they departed and continued their chores. They delivered their loaves of bread to the households that bought from them. Her knowledge from her previous life helped her a lot. Baking bread became her main job. Sometimes she earned money; other times she traded for goods. But the villagers were too kind — they often gave her many things for free.
Just like Aunt Marsha — the one who helped her that night too. The one with the same smile as the lady from her previous life.
"Just take it. We produced too many vegetables. It is too much for our household," she said.
"Thank you, Aunt!" Arisha said.
"No problem, honey. You have to eat healthy so you can grow up well!" she said. "Please tell your sister, if she is free, could she help with my work?"
Since Aunt Marsha cannot use sign language, Arisha always interprets for Irisha.
"Aunt Marsha asked for your help."
[Is it about a sales recap?]
"Yes! It is!"
Sometimes Aunt Marsha can answer things she already understands.
[Okay, I will come to your house after I am done with the delivery.] Irisha said with a smile.
Aunt Marsha answered with an even brighter smile, "You are a great help. Thank you."
And in moments like that — when Aunt Marsha uses even simple sign language — Irisha's heart always feels lighter and warmer.
.
.
... and that is how it is.
That is basically how she is living now. In a small and isolated village far from civilization — with refreshing scenery and her lovely little sister.
She never thought there would be a life where she happily ends each day and excitedly expects another one to come. To enjoy the beauty of nature. To appreciate the sky every day. To rely on someone. To love someone so dearly.
Was this what happiness was supposed to feel like?
***