The elevator thumped to a stop. The LED light above the door flickered a crisp number seven. But Andrei rolled his eyes. He took in a sharp breath, stoicism in his eyes despite the fact that his heart was pounding so hard, he thought it'd run away. He gripped the piles for emotional support.
"What?" He swallowed. It wasn't a secret, what he was doing. Everyone who went to the gym past eleven knew he was watching the boy dance. Andrei never once moved a muscle in that room unless it was to write something. Most people who passed by definitely saw the boy's silhouette. The idea of the boy willingly crying and moving until he broke was fish to Andrei.
Andrei is allergic to fish.
The pink-haired boy's face dropped. "Y...you didn...didn't know? I-I th-thought y-you liked it.. I-you always sm-smile at me."
"Yeah, cause you're beautiful." Andrei grunted, a hand out as if he was demonstrating his point. The other tensed. "Oh! I-uhm..okay, th-thank you."
"How is your ankle?"
"I-it's fine...wh-why?"
Andrei's head snapped the other way. He let out a breath. "You're hurting yourself. Every time you dance. You're limping now, isn't that insane, malysh?" He breathed, sharp and heavy. He didn't see the vanilla and crayons-scented boy flinch.
"I...it-it doesn't hurt...y-you al-always look at me so sweetly...I j-just want to make you happy."
The doors are the least of Andrei's problems now. The clay drying on his chest didn't have nearly as much skin as the boy's blushy face. Red bloomed through his cheeks and to his neck. Even his collarbones flustered.
His mouth opened as if to say something. To scream something until his lungs begged for peace. Instead, he clamped it shut and bit down on his lip. "Don't do it anymore." He scoffed silently, his eyes rolled. The small boy seemed to catch it. So beautiful and delicate, he tensed.
"Okay..uhm, I won-I'll j-just p-perform what y-you want-want..Wh-when y-you tell me, okay?"
"I won't tell you to do anything."
"You..you don't want to watch me dance anymore...?"
Andrei just glanced at him. Almost a throwaway. He reached into the back pocket of his jeans and pulled out Marlboro Black. He sighed, his fingers digging into the box shakily.
"Okay." Andrei didn't even say anything so why is the boy replying?
"You look amazing while dancing, neighbor." Andrei huffed. Sarcasm bled its way through even though every word being true. "But I don't want you to hurt yourself over something as stupid as a sketch."
"Oh."
The boy frowned and stepped back. Andrei closed his eyes. He did that thing again. His throat felt tight and his stomach churned as the cigarette rested on his lips but his fingers were too hesitant to light it. He shouldn't have. Now, his heart is pounding outside of his body in embarrassment. His cheeks burned.
He snapped the cigarette from his lips. It hurt to do so, but he couldn't let this opportunity walk away from him. He turned to the boy sharply even though his lips stung. The pink-haired boy was curled in on himself. His shoulders were tense and his eyes were downcast. He bounced from one foot to the other absentmindedly.
"What's your name?" Andrei asked. He didn't know why or how to clear the rudeness he'd left.
Whatever was in that question made the other boy smile. He faced Andrei with his neck bent so far back, Andrei wanted to hold it back down. Instead, the taller man leaned down, kneeling to meet his eyes. Enough so that the boy didn't feel tiny. Enough so that Andrei could see him eye to eye.
"It's Yoonjae. Yoonjae Moon...it's nice to meet you."
Yoonjae. Yoonjae Moon.
Andrei wanted to engrave it in everything. His skin, his paint, his mud. Everything.
Otherwise, he just cleared his throat. The tip of his lips smirked the tiniest bit. "I'm Andrei. Smirnov Andrei. Where are you from? How old are you?" He held a hand out. They'd know each other, he still sounded like a creep. Even though he forced a smile and was being not as regular. He's seen Yoonjae sweat. He's seen Yoonjae sob. He's seen the boy crumble to his feet and tremble with nerves and exhaustion. It was to be polite, Andrei reminded himself. Andrei wasn't polite. His last boyfriend and him got together in two hours.
"Cali-california! And....I just turned twenty-one.... I like the winter better here...how-how about y-you?" Right, they were still talking. Andrei's head fills to the brim with useless quizzes and other things no sensible person cared about. Twenty-one? A little younger than Andrei's type. It didn't matter when the boy's fingers filled his palms up. They were warm. Chubby, cute.
He glanced at their entwined hands while scratching the tip of his nose with his free one. "I'm from Russia. Twenty-three. How was California?"
The boy, Yoonjae, giggled. He brushed a bubbly strand behind his ear and bat his lashes. "I like-like h-how y-you say..Cal-Cali..it's-can-can I s-say i-it or is that, uhm...racist?"
"Go ahead."
"Okay! Y-you say it like 'Callie-foneah'...it's really cute! Hihi."
"Is it?"
"Mhm! I probably shouldn't call you cute cause you don't look cute but you are to me and well, you are cute, hihi! I just mean you're so strong and manly and stuff." He bounced. "I-I probably sh-shouldn't h-have sa-said that, r-right....? G-goodness! I-I'm s-sorry-"
Andrei looked him up and down, straightening out. "Don't worry, kid. I enjoy talking to you too."
"Oh! Th-thank y-you, hihi.."
The blonde held an arm over the door and motioned for Yoonjae to go. When the boy shakily stepped out, he stopped completely and stared at Andrei. Weird.
"I think you're perfect. Hm." Andrei bit his lip. His eyes dropped down. The smaller man stood with one knee up, bracing. Andrei knew that pain. He could see it every evening, every morning he watched this man roam around. "Don't-god." The words came out scattered. He clutched his nose. A figure so beautiful, a world so poisonous and precious within this boy. You could see it in those golden orbs. When the light hit them perfectly. His throat clumped up.
He closed his eyes, turning the other way. "It was nice meeting you, Yoonjae. I hope to see you again. Good night, mhm?" He sighed. The pride to say something else was far. Walking away from him like every other piece of confidence he's had. The boy dripped it. Beauty. The fountain of unrequited innocence and gorgeousness swallowed him. Gulped down each and every part. Andrei wanted to do that too. He wanted to feel his bones touching his. He wanted to, needed, to pull that boy in his arms and feel the blood pulsing through him.
He couldn't.
Yoonjae only frowned. "Oh, okay. I-I h-hope I didn't...make this awkward."
"No, doll, of course not."