VIII
At 2 PM, Su Tang knocked on Lu Shiyan's door again.
"Mr. Lu, this afternoon's treatment is 'Art Therapy.'"
Lu Shiyan opened the door to find her carrying a drawing board, paints, and brushes.
"Drawing?"
"Drawing." Su Tang handed him the board. "Draw anything you want."
"I can't draw."
"That's okay. It doesn't have to be good, just fun."
Lu Shiyan took the board and looked at it. "Draw what?"
"For example, draw how you're feeling today."
"My feelings?" Lu Shiyan thought. "I don't have feelings."
"Then draw 'no feelings.'"
Lu Shiyan paused for three seconds, sat down, and picked up a brush.
He thought for a long time, then finally drew a straight line on the paper.
A horizontal line, perfectly straight, without any curve.
Su Tang looked at the line. "This is your feeling?"
"Yes. No ups, no downs. Nothing."
"Do you think a straight line is beautiful?"
Lu Shiyan paused.
Su Tang picked up another brush and drew a wavy line next to the straight line.
"Look. If a straight line represents calm, a wavy line represents happiness. Aren't these two lines together much more beautiful?"
Lu Shiyan looked at the two lines and was silent for a long time.
"I don't need beautiful," he said.
"But you need happiness." Su Tang held out the brush. "Come on, draw a wavy line."
Lu Shiyan didn't take the brush.
Su Tang wasn't in a hurry. She just stood there holding it.
Another ten-second standoff.
Finally, Lu Shiyan took the brush and drew a crooked wavy line on the paper.
It was more like a jagged line, rising and falling like an EKG.
Su Tang looked at it and smiled. "Not bad. Improvement. Tomorrow we'll draw two wavy lines."
Lu Shiyan glanced at her, and the corner of his mouth moved slightly.
It wasn't a smile, but it wasn't not a smile.
Su Tang noticed and was secretly pleased.
Only the second day, and already so many changes. At this rate, in a week he'd be…
"Director Su." Lu Shiyan spoke suddenly.
"Yes?"
"Doesn't it wear you out, spending every day like this with patients?"
Su Tang thought about it. "Yes, but it's worth it."
"Why worth it?"
"Because seeing patients get better makes me happy." She looked into his eyes, serious. "For example, yesterday you couldn't smile. Today you moved the corner of your mouth. That's progress."
Lu Shiyan unconsciously touched the corner of his mouth. "I didn't smile."
"You did." Su Tang smiled. "You just didn't notice."
Lu Shiyan was silent.
He suddenly felt that this woman was terrifying. She seemed able to see through all his defenses, straight into his softest place.
"Did you study psychology?" he asked.
"Of course. I'm a psychologist."
"So can you tell what I'm thinking right now?"
Su Tang looked at him for three seconds. "You're thinking, 'Is this woman conning me?'"
Lu Shiyan's expression froze.
"Was I right?" Su Tang asked, smiling.
Lu Shiyan didn't answer. He lowered his head, picked up the brush, and drew another wavy line on the paper.
This time, it was much better looking than the first.
IX
At 4 PM, Su Tang brought Lu Shiyan to the last treatment of the day—"Group Sharing."
The venue was the activity room. Participants included Uncle Wang, "The Alien Prince," Lin Xiaonuan, and several stable patients.
Su Tang had everyone sit in a circle, with a fruit platter in the middle.
"Today's topic is 'My Dream.'" Su Tang said. "Everyone take turns sharing your dream. Anything goes."
Uncle Wang raised his hand first. "My dream is to live to be a hundred."
"That's definitely achievable." Su Tang smiled.
"The Alien Prince" went second. "My dream is to go back to my home planet."
"Very imaginative." Su Tang nodded.
When it was Lin Xiaonuan's turn, she thought for a moment. "My dream is a raise."
"That's very practical too." Su Tang laughed.
Then it was Lu Shiyan's turn.
Everyone looked at him.
Lu Shiyan was silent for a long time. "I don't have a dream."
"How can anyone not have a dream?" Uncle Wang didn't believe it.
"I just don't." Lu Shiyan's tone was flat. "I don't need dreams. I need goals."
"What's the difference between a goal and a dream?" Lin Xiaonuan asked curiously.
"A goal must be achieved. A dream can be abandoned."
The room went quiet.
Su Tang looked at him, her heart aching slightly.
This man carried all his "musts" on his shoulders, never allowing himself to just "could."
"Mr. Lu," she said softly, "you know, dreams aren't necessarily meant to be achieved. Sometimes, dreams are just things that make life more interesting."
"Like what?"
"Like Uncle Wang's dream of living to be a hundred. That dream gets him up early to exercise, pays attention to his diet, keeps a good mood. The meaning of a dream isn't in the result, but in the process."
Lu Shiyan looked at her, thoughtful.
"Then what's your dream?" he asked.
Su Tang thought for a moment. "My dream is to turn this rehabilitation center into the best psychological healing center in the country."
"Why?"
"Because I want to prove that mental illness isn't something to be ashamed of. That everyone deserves understanding and love."
When she said this, her eyes sparkled again.
Lu Shiyan watched that sparkle, and said something he hadn't planned to say:
"I can help with that."
The room went quiet again.
Su Tang paused. "Help?"
"I mean," Lu Shiyan paused, "if you need funding or resources, I can…"
"Mr. Lu," Su Tang interrupted, "right now you're my patient, not an investor. Your job right now is to cure your insomnia, not help me achieve my dream."
Lu Shiyan was silent.
Uncle Wang laughed beside him. "Mr. Lu, you got rejected."
Lu Shiyan glared at him. Uncle Wang pretended not to notice and continued eating fruit.
Su Tang smiled. "But thank you for the offer. After you're better, we can talk about collaboration."
Lu Shiyan looked at her and didn't speak again.
But something inside him had quietly loosened.