Life journey of neet aspirant

Mai jab 7th class me thi tab meri grandma ak cancer patient thi unhone six months survive kiya aur fir unhone iss duniya ko chhod diya meri grandma mujhe bahut pyar krti thi aur sayad Mujhe bhi apne parents se jyada apni grandma se hi lagav thi. Jiss din meri grandma mujhe chhod kr gyi uss din hi maine ye sochh liya tha Ki Mai ab doctor bnungi lekin uss waqt nanhe se dimaak me doctors ke sacrifices,struggle,dedication ke sath kaam krna inn sari baato ka khyal hi nahi aaya bss grandma ke khone Ki wajah se wo AK sapna pura krne Ka soch Liya. Maine 8th me school change kiya aur wahi se meri Life ka turning point start hua Maine socha bhi nahi tha ki dusre school me admission ke baad mujhe itni problems jhelni padegi fir bhi Maine puri koshish Ki aur result bhi kafi sahi aaya. Jab Maine 9th me enter kiya to Mai apne spne ko puri Tarah bhul gyi thi mai sochti rahi Ki abhi bahut time h maine apna 9th bilkul achhe se nahi padha 9th me hi meri life me koi aaya halaki aaj bhi wo mere sath hi h lekin ham sab iss cheej ko samjh skte hai Ki kachchi umar me dil lgana padhai se distract krne jaisa hota h aur wo pyar mere liye distraction hi bna jab Maine yearly exams diye to Mai pass to ho gyi lekin percentage bilkul achhi nahi thi. Lekin pyar ko lekar mai kafi serious thi to Maine pyar ko chhodne ka decision nahi liya Maine Unke sath distraction ko lekar discussion kiya aur padhai par jyada dhyan dene ki koshish Ki unhone bhi pura support kiya aur meri padhai kafi behtar hui maine ye Sab discussion 10th start hone k baad hi kiya tha kyunki boards bhi bahut jruri the isiliye to jab Mai boards dene gyi to mujhe ye to pta tha Ki mere results 75 percent se kam nahi aayega aur jab result aaya to mere 80.4 percent bne mai bahut khush thi ghar pe bhi Sab khush the unhe bhi bahut khushi thi Ki mere marks kafi improve hue. Zindagi ne nya mod to tab liya jab Mai 11th me aayi. 11th me mujhe aisa lg raha tha jaise bss ab Mai fir se waise hi marks laungi jaise pahle lati thi. Lekin 11th me aakar Maine spne ko fir se jagaya aur biology stream li. Mujhe hamesha se maths me bahut problem aati thi aur Maine kabhi uss problem ko sahi krne Ki nahi sochi na kabhi koshish Ki meri maths itni weak thi ki mai agar exam time par maths ka exam deti thi to aate hue sawal bhi galat krti thi itna darr tha mujhe math se Mai hamesha chahti thi Ki math mera peechha kab chhodegi 11th me math chhutne Ki khushi to bahut thi lekin jyada din tak nahi kyunki physics ne jeena haram kr diya jo cheeje mai maths me krti thi wahi habit meri physics me bhi aa gyi physics ko na padhna na numericals solve krna jab bhi pdhne baithti to ya to biology uthati ya fir chemistry notes bhi nahi bnati thi physics ke .biology aur chemistry me achhe marks se pass ho jati thi lekin physics ki halat itni kharab thi Ki mujhe end time Pe yahi lga ki 11th me ab compartment aa jayegi lekin last December tak Maine physics Ki offline coaching join Ki aur bio aur chemistry Ki online liye thi pahle se liye to Physics bhi thi lekin mujhe koi Interest nahi aata tha physics me isiliye classes hi nahi leti thi. Jab end me Maine physics Ki offline coaching join Ki to mujhe pahle k kuchh Dino tak bilkul achha nahi lga mera dimaak physics ke terms yaad hi nahi kr paa raha tha mera headache hota rahta tha kyunki ab maine physics ko lekar apne dimaak me jor dalna suru kr diya mai biology chemistry Ki jagah physics ko uthati thi mere teacher jo bhi numericals bhejte unhe solve krne Ki koshish krti thi .lekin mere mind allow hi nahi kr Raha tha physics ko padhne Ki jaise mere dimaak bhi yahi chahta tha Ki use koi mehnat na krni pde aur inn sabki jimmedar sirf aur sirf mai hi thi Maine hi apne mind par kabhi force nahi dala kabhi usse mehnat ka kaam nahi krwaya usme Bhi jaise jang lg gyi Ho mehnat se dur bhagne lga ho. Lekin mujhe apne mind ko mahnat to krwani thi aur isne ki bhi lekin usse mere physical me bahut affect pda kyunki Mai over think krti rahti raat me der tak physics Ko jabardasti padhti thi iss wajah se aur tension hoti thi lekin one and half month tak Mai kafi khush thi kyunki chhote chhote numericals mai achhe se kr pati thi mujhe formulas learn krne me problem kam hone lgi inn sab me mujhe mentally happy mere partner krte the unse baat krke over think kam hoti thi mere coaching teacher bhi bahut achhe se padhate the jisse mera basic bhi sahi hua .mere partner kafi supportive the unhone hamesha meri padhai ko mujhse jyada important smjha aur unke iss behavior se mujhe kafi achha feel hota tha kyunki ab koi distraction nahi tha sirf AK hi problem thi wo thi mere mind ko train krna Mai mehnat krti gyi mujhe gharwalo ka bhi kafi support mila khaskar meri mummy ka jo mujhe emotionally support deti thi hamesha mujhe meri baate sunti thi aur kabhi bhi meri soch ko lekar mujhe Judge krne Ki koshish nahi Ki. March aaya Maine Maine yearly diye or pta h mere physics me kitne aaye 52 out off 100 ha kafi kam hai lekin Mai bahut khush thi kyunki haha mere passing mark bhi nahi the waha aaj mai itna to laa payi mujhe uss din khud par confidence aaya . Lekin fir meri mummy ko mere pyar ke baare me pta chl gya aur fir.....