Luton, Bedfordshire, London
2012
Must I really do this? This question haunts me. And yet, the answer remains the same - yes. Yes, I am not prepared for this, but I am left with no other option. My family relies on me, and I bear a burden of responsibilities that i need to lift. I can no longer hold out hope for a miracle to happen. I am left with no choice but to accept my destiny and kill my dreams for the sake of those I hold dear. I can do this. I can kill my dreams for my family. How difficult it is to bid farewell to one's dreams and move ahead. But I am strong. I can do this.
Ethan, a lean and strikingly handsome man, sitting on the side of the corridor, his eyes intently scanning the complex patterns of the carpet below. The contrasting mix of colors beneath him is hauntingly familiar, mirroring the thoughts racing through his mind. Should he go inside that room for this interview, or step back just a bit longer? The reality was inevitable, the chaos in his life demands his full attention. Taking a deep breath, Ethan direct his gaze to the folder cradled in his hands. It had been over a month since he lost every penny in his start up along with his reputation a bitter pill he never thought he would have to swallow. The dream he had nurtured with all his heart, now lay in ruins, leaving him with no option but to seek employment elsewhere. He needed a job, and that is exactly why he finds himself in this corridor. This interview marked the fiftieth one he had attended in just a month. He is exhausted with hearing 'Nos'.
"Mr. Ethan Hall!" The receptionist's voice cuts through the air, drawing Ethan's attention. He looks up, a hint of anxiousness in his eyes, and replies, "Yes! It's me."
"You can go inside now," she says, gesturing toward the door.
Ethan gathers his folder, rising from his chair. He smooths out any creases in his suit, a final touch of preparation, before confidently stepping toward the door. He opens it and enters the interview room.
Seated within is an elderly man, the interviewer.
"Hello, sir!" Ethan greets him with a warm smile.
"Hello, Mr. Hall," the interviewer responds, his tone professional but detached.
Ethan takes a seat across from him.
"Mr. Hall," the interviewer begins, "I reviewed your resume, and while you possess impressive qualifications, I must be straightforward. Your experience is limited to your own company over the years. Regrettably, you lack broader experience…"
Ethan's mind begins to bounce away with the words, drowning out the man's voice. He knows what he wants to say, but he finds himself simply staring, hearing the words yet not truly listening anymore.
Don't want to waste my time! If you were going to say no, then why did you invite me here? Is this man for real? He called me early in the morning just to tell me that I am not capable for his company.
"I'm sorry, but at this time, we can't hire you, Mr. Hall! Mr. Hall!"
"Yes!" Ethan snaps back to reality.
"What happened?" the interviewer inquires, a hint of confusion on his face.
"Umm... Nothing. Thank you very much for considering me for this position."
Ethan stands abruptly and exits the room, the door closing behind him with an echo.
As he walks out of the office, he loosens his tie, frustration erupting inside him. In a moment of rage, he kicks a pole and screams out into the emptiness, feeling utterly disgusted. After dedicating a decade of hard work, someone has just mocked all his efforts. In the eyes of the world, it seems none of it holds any value.
He heads to the bus stand, taking a seat as he watches cars pass by. An overwhelming emptiness envelops him, and he reconsiders all his choices. What he thought was a clear path now feels chaotic and blur to him, leaving him unsure of where to begin to pick up the pieces.
Suddenly, his phone buzzes with a message. He checks it.
"Don't forget to pick up Alain from school. -Alice"
Panic sets in.
"Fuck!" Ethan mutters under his breath.
He completely forgot to pick up his son. Glancing at his watch, he realizes it's already 1:00 PM—he's late. With urgency, he gathers his belongings and dashes across the street toward the school.
What is happening to me? How could I forget this? Alain might be sitting there all alone, waiting for me.
Navigating through the crowd, Ethan's determination intensifies. Disappointing his son is not an option; Alain is the one person who truly believes in him and doesn't see him as a failure.
In his haste, Ethan bumps into a woman exiting a bakery, her box of pastries soaring through the air before crashing to the ground. Time seems to freeze for a moment as he feels a strange connection, a fleeting sense of familiarity. Their eyes locks.
He travels into completely new world for a moment. These eyes, he knows these eyes. The time stops as his gaze falls on her. He cannot take away his eyes from her. His heart skips a beat. Who is she? Why is he feeling this, this striking pain as if something huge is just kept on his chest and removed. He feels thousands of emotions in a second. Did he know her? The thought stuck inside his mind, but now isn't the time to ask.
Regaining his composure, he looks into her eyes as they both gaze down at the ruined pastries.
What have I done?!
"I am so sorry," he exclaims, suddenly aware of his tardiness.
"I'll pay for them, I promise," he adds, urgency in his voice, before rushing off.
The woman stands there, surprised, staring at the scattered pastries and the figure of the man who just collided with her.
Ethan finally arrives at school, pausing in front of the building as he catches his breath. He quickly tucks in his shirt, pats down his suit, and strides inside. "Am I early?" he wonders, noticing the bustling crowd. The school is adorned with colorful decorations, and a sense of excitement fills the air. 'What am I forgetting?' he thinks nervously. 'At least I'm dressed appropriately. Oh! 'Foodie Fair'—that's it! I was supposed to bring those sandwiches for Alain. How could I let that slip my mind?'
"Shit!" he mutters under his breath, scanning the area for his son. He remembers that Alice, his wife, had prepared the sandwiches this morning, but he forgot to pick them up. As he searches, he spots Alain standing in a panda costume, chatting with a woman nearby.
"ALAIN!!" Ethan calls out, his voice cutting through the noise. Alain's face lights up with excitement as he turns to see his dad. "DAD!!" he shouts, waving in excitement as he rushes to Ethan and wraps him in a tight hug.
The woman Alain was talking to turns around, and Ethan's heart sinks—it's the same lady from the pastry shop. Yes, she's the one whose pastries he accidentally ruined. Now, here he stands in front of her, feeling embarrassed coz of his earlier blunder. What is he going to say? She might be here to bring treats for the fair, and he had messed it all up.
"Fuck!" Ethan whispers to himself, anxiety stirs within him.
"What happened, Dad?" Alain asks innocently, looking up at him.
"Nothing. Nothing at all," Ethan replies, forcing a smile.
Just then, the mystery woman approaches him, and Ethan can sense that she recognizes him. He's torn between the urge to flee and the instinct to stay put. Why does she seem so familiar? He thinks of making a quick exit, but the thought of how that would look stops him in his tracks. As he wrestles with his thoughts, she stands right in front of him.
"Nice to meet you, Mr. Hall. I'm Ruth, Ruth Miller. I'm Aurora's mother," she introduces herself with a friendly smile.
"Hello, Mrs. Miller. I'm Ethan, Ethan Hall," he responds, trying to maintain his smile despite of the mess going on in his mind.