Chapter 7: The Festival Ends.
And Then...
The final hurrah of Eichou High's cultural festival—a
bonfire lit in the very center of the school courtyard as a
sort of closing ceremony—was apparently a tradition that
had been passed down since the school's founding. Cultural
clubs and motivated students would put on little
performances, people would sing karaoke, and everyone
would chow down on all the unsold leftovers from the food
stalls. It was a real party all around, though it never got too
out of hand. I'd also heard that some students, maybe
driven by the excitement of being at school in the nighttime,
would take the chance to ask each other out and stuff...
Buuut attendance was completely optional, so I hadn't
participated at all during my first year at the school,
naturally.
"Okay, everyone—next up, we've got the tag team of
your dreams: a collaboration between the pop music club
and the dance club!" a festival executive committee
member shouted into a microphone, much to the crowd's
delight.
I was sitting a ways off from said crowd in the shadows,
watching the bonfire flicker away in the distance. Next year,
we'd be studying for our exams. That meant that this was
the last year we'd get to take a really active role in the
festival, and that was the big reason why I'd stuck around. It
sort of felt like a waste to not be there for the event's
conclusion at least once. Oh, and I also still had a problem
on my plate that needed solving, of course.
"Hey, Yotsuba," Yuna said as she and Rinka walked over
to me.
"We brought you a drink," said Rinka.
"Oh... Thanks," I replied. "Sorry I sent you guys out for
them."
"Eh, it's fine," Yuna said with a shrug. "I mean, we're the
ones who wore you out, right?"
"Ha ha ha..." Rinka chuckled as she awkwardly scratched
her cheek.
In the end, we really did spend the whole rest of the
festival, and the cleanup period, er...let's say "losing track of
time." We didn't look around the stalls or anything at all.
What drove us to go quite that far? As best as I could tell,
the same sense of not wanting to miss out that drove me to
attend this closing event.
Anyway, Yuna and Rinka were doing just fine now, but I'd
never had much stamina to begin with, and those meager
reserves had been pushed to their limit. I opened up the
plastic bottle that Yuna had handed me and took a long swig
of the sports drink within. It was a little lukewarm, but still
really tasty.
"I guess that's a wrap, huh?" I said.
"That's right," Rinka agreed. "It's hitting me a little
harder than it did last year."
"Same. Probably since the performance was so fun and
all," Yuna chimed in.
The two of them looked totally satisfied. From what I'd
heard, they hadn't joined in on the closing party last year
either. As it turned out, that was kind of my fault—I'd raced
along home at the first chance I got, and the two of them
had each independently decided that it wasn't worth
sticking around if I wasn't there. I'd only learned that when
they brought it up with me just a little while ago, and while
it sort of made me happy, I also felt sort of bad for causing
problems for them...
"Ah, Yocchi!"
Hm? I know that nickname...!
"Akksy!" I shouted as I caught sight of her. Akane
Hishimochi—Akksy—was walking toward me from the
bonfire, giving me the biggest wave she could.
"Hey! I'm surprised you stayed late for this," said Akksy.
"You too!" I replied. "I thought you'd have gone home to
study for your tests!"
"Eh—I skipped the daytime part of the festival to make
up for it. I've always liked these wrap-up parties, and as you
well know, I'm basically nocturnal."
"I didn't know that at all, actually..."
Yup—that's the Akksy we all know and love, all right. At
first I hadn't quite known what to make of her, but as of our
third meeting, she'd reached a "trading jokes and japes with
the owner" level of regular customer status in the local
eatery of my mind...or actually, that might be a little much.
"Who's this, Yotsuba?" asked Rinka.
"Oh! Umm, she's a third-year who—"
"Geh!" Akksy squawked in incredibly loud surprise. "I-I-I-IIs... Is th-that... A-A-Are th-th-they...th-th-the S-SSacrosaaaaaanct?!"
Oh. Oh, right! Akksy's the president of the Sacrosanct fan
club! And while Koganezaki's helping manage the fan club
because she wants to keep their activities reasonable and
rational, Akksy's the opposite! She's just their superobsessive ultra-fan, plain and simple! And that means that if
she's suddenly exposed to both of them at point-blank
range, she's basically guaranteed to lose it!
"Ahabuwabuhawgh..."
"Or maybe she'll pass out?!"
I jumped forward to catch Akksy before she collapsed on
the spot.
"U-Umm...?" said Yuna.
"I-Is she all right?" Rinka asked.
The two of them were completely bewildered by Akksy's
behavior—and, I mean, I guess they would be! The question
was: How could I explain it to them?
"So..." I whispered, "maybe I should step aside for a
minute, and you can just—"
"N-No! No way no how nope nope nope!" Akksy
frantically babbled as she grabbed onto me, holding me in
place! "Don't leave me here, Yocchi! I can't take this on my
own! I need you here!"
"O-Ow! That hurts! Ouch!"
How's she gripping me that strongly?! Is she getting one
of those moment-of-mortal-peril adrenaline rushes right
now?! She's that against being alone with them?!
"So..."
"Yotsuba...?"
Agggh?! And now they're both giving me that "Oh, great,
you did it again" look?!
"O-Okay! I get it! I'll stay, I'll stay!" I shouted.
"Really...?" said Akksy. "You won't run away if I let go?
That feels like it'd be pretty in-character for you, right?"
"I can't totally deny it, but I promise I definitely won't run
this time!"
I didn't know why she was giving me such a distrustful,
pleading stare in the first place, but for the time being, I
tried to dispel her doubts with everything I had. Yuna's and
Rinka's stares were getting painful in their own right, so
there was no time to waste!
Are
!kos
lass We Are
AB!KOS
class
Bi
"U-Uhhmnh!" Akksy yelped, once again ridiculously
loudly. She also very casually sidled around behind me as if I
were a human shield. "Yesterday! Show! It was great! Really
good! Awesome!"
Oh, Akksy was watching? I guess she wouldn't miss it,
come to think of it. And considering how borderline
incomprehensible her words were, I assumed she was trying
to talk to Yuna and Rinka now, not me.
"O-Oh. Thank you?" said Rinka.
"Makina put on an incredible show too, of course, but the
two of you were just—ahh, your synergy was just perfect! If
you ever put on a show with just the two of you, I swear I'll
line up at nine p.m. the day before just to make sure I get in
and see Your Holinesses perform again!!!"
"'H-Holinesses'?!" yelped Yuna.
"Line up where...?" asked Rinka.
"I will, of course, get a banner custom-made and recruit
volunteers to hold it up during the show! I seriously
considered getting one for this show, but seeing as it was
your first ever performance, I knew there was a chance that
too much support could actually be counterproductive and
just put more pressure on you than ever...or so I thought,
but even though I spent ages agonizing over it, having now
witnessed your moment of glory with my own two unworthy
eyes, I've realized that I was entirely wrong, all my fears
were groundless, and the fact that I ever had them in the
first place means that I am, in fact, worth less than a pile of
garbage!"
Akksy's faltering mumblings had done a complete aboutface and morphed into a seemingly endless motormouthed
ramble to end all rambles about how amazing Yuna and
Rinka were. I didn't actually catch the better part of what
she'd said, to be totally honest, and since this was Yuna and
Rinka's first time meeting her, I knew they were probably
having an even harder time following any of it. The looks
they were giving me had some serious Really, who is she?
energy, that's for sure!
"H-Hey, Akksy? Let's just take a second to calm down,
okay? Come on, deep breaths!" I said.
"Wuh?! Ah, right. Haaah... Pheeew..."
Akksy took a deep breath. Silence fell. That seemed like
the best chance I'd get, so I decided to take my shot.
"So, umm, this is Akane Hishimochi! She's a third year,
and we just became friends a few—"
"Yes, that's right! Friends! We're friends among friends!
Downright besties!" Akksy said as she hugged me from
behind.
Wha—?!
"Hmm..."
"Friends, huh...?"
Two very suspicious stares turned my way once more.
Wait...did I just get myself suspected of funny business all
over again?!
"It's pretty rare for her to call someone a nickname, isn't
it?" said Yuna.
"True," Rinka agreed. "She's been calling us by our real
names for the whole past year—ever since we met,
practically."
"I-It's not that weird, is it?! N-No way, right...?" I
stammered. But even as I made the claim, I looked back and
tried to come up with some nicknames I'd called
people...and only came up with Miki, which didn't even
count because that was actually just her first name, and it
had never even felt like a formal nickname to begin with.
"Looks like we've got even more reason than usual to ask
what's going on between you two," said Yuna.
"I mean, I dunno if 'going on' is the phrase I would use..."
"It's a little late to try to keep it hidden, wouldn't you
say?" said Rinka.
"I-I'm not, really! It's just that, umm, Akksy's the
president of the Sacrosanct fan club, so we ended up—"
"What?" Yuna and Rinka said in perfect unison, freezing
up on the spot. Akksy's shoulders jolted conspicuously as
well.
Oh. Did I just mess up again somehow...?
"The Sacrosanct fan club?" Yuna repeated.
"Its president?" said Rinka.
Their stares turned to Akksy next. The look in their eyes
had shifted, suspicion changing into extremely intense
caution!
"Ah, I, umm, well," Akksy babbled. She was obviously
terrified, and was actually shivering.
O-Oh, duh! Sure, those two have more or less reached an
acceptance of the whole Sacrosanct thing, but that doesn't
mean they're one hundred percent okay with everything
that the fan club that worships them does on account of it!
It all made sense now. No wonder Akksy had gone from
flying on cloud nine to plunging into the depths of hell over
the course of a single sentence! And unfortunately, I
couldn't just sit back and watch her suffer...!
"H-Hey, guys?" I said. "Sure, she's the president of the
fan club, but, umm, I'm pretty sure she's only doing it
because she genuinely admires the two of you, and,
umm..."
"Miss President...?" said Rinka.
"Y-Yesh?!" Akksy squeaked.
Th-They're ignoring me...! And that glance they both just
shot me felt like a Be quiet for a minute, Yotsuba sort of look
for sure!
"The thing is, we've heard a story or two about how
you've been spreading pictures of us all around the school,"
said Yuna.
"I-I, umm..."
Oh, yikes! The look in her eyes has gone from "caution"
to "outright hostility"!
I'd actually heard those rumors as well. Before I actually
met one of them—that being Koganezaki—I'd been under
the impression that the fan-club people were doing some
pretty terrible stuff when it came to Yuna and Rinka's
privacy. Nowadays I had confidence that Koganezaki would
be there to keep things in check and made sure nobody
crossed any really nasty lines, but considering that Yuna and
Rinka were the subjects of those theoretical privacy
invasions—and also that they barely knew Koganezaki or
Akksy at all—I really couldn't blame them for reacting like
this.
"I-I'm... I'm..." said Akksy. "I'm sooo sorrryyyyyyyyy!!!"
She's groveling! Full-blown, face-pressed-to-the-ground
groveling! Sure, I've done that my fair share of times too (or
it sure feels like it, anyway), but wow, watching someone
else do it is...well, it sure is something!
Silence.
Ahhh?! And Yuna and Rinka aren't reacting at all! It must
be because they're already used to seeing people (read:
me) grovel before them—it's lost its impact with repetition!
I'm so sorry, Akksy! It's all my fault for blowing through my
grovel-stock so carelessly!
"Desire's like a stress ball," Akksy muttered.
"What?" said Yuna.
"The more you try to squeeze it down, the harder it
pushes back against you, until finally, bang! It bursts all
over you...and then there's just no fixing it anymore. And
that means that some kids would end up going crazy for
sure, more or less," she carried on, still speaking in a quiet,
almost inaudible murmur.
When I say "almost inaudible," by the way, I mean to me.
Yuna and Rinka definitely couldn't hear her at all! And so I
decided to step in and serve as her interpreter—or, well,
more like her megaphone, I guess?—relaying her words as
she carried on.
"That's why you have to let out a little steam every once
in a while before it builds up... Otherwise they might've
started taking really extreme creepshots, or editing their
pictures in really bad ways and spreading them around, or
even doing something bad to the two of you directly if
things got really out of hand. That's why Mai...why Ms. Mai
Koganezaki and I got together and worked out ways that we
could make sure it didn't come to that. We were just trying
to keep the fan club wholesome and make sure everyone
was satisfied, so, umm..."
"...Is what she said!" I concluded.
"Hmm," went Yuna.
"Is that so?" said Rinka.
The reactions: understated. Akksy and I: shivering.
"I-I'm not trying to say that I was doing it for your own
good, or anything like that," Akksy piped up. "But...I just
wanted to watch my favorite pairing from a healthy
distance. I just wanted you to be happy. That's really all...
I'm so sorry..."
"Akksy..."
Tears dribbled down Akksy's cheeks, and I just couldn't
stop myself from sympathizing with her. From what I
understood, she'd always been the sort of person who
latched onto an interest and went all in on it, more or less?
Back when we first met, she'd told me how she'd once loved
an idol group, but circumstances had played out in a way
that left her unable to support them anymore... And
watching her eyes sparkle with glee as she'd talked about
her new obsession just moments before—seeing how full of
life she seemed—I couldn't help but think about how happy
she looked. I knew that all of this must have been as
unpleasant as could be for Yuna and Rinka, but some part of
me still wondered...
"Well...you do you, I guess," Yuna said with a very
perfunctory, half-hearted sigh.
"Huh?" I grunted.
"People have been taking pictures of us without
permission since middle school. It's nothing new," Rinka
added. "In fact, things have gotten a lot better compared to
how they were back then."
"Th-They have...?" I said. I was in a state of minor
disbelief, and Akksy seemed just as dumbfounded as she
looked up at the two of them.
"And besides, we're the ones who set the whole
Sacrosanct ball rolling in the first place," said Yuna.
"Building up that image was our choice, and now we get to
live with it. C'est la vie."
"S-Say la what...? I-I mean, oh, right!"
I remembered the day they'd revealed that truth to me—
the day that I confessed I'd been two-timing them—very
clearly. The two of them were each tremendously special in
their own rights, and could easily have been the center of
attention without the other. When they came together,
however, all sorts of problems that they would otherwise
have to face more or less resolved themselves. That was
why they'd decided to deliberately frame themselves as a
set—to put on an act and bring out as much of that certain
precious something that could only be achieved when two
girls got along really well with each other as they could.
"We started this ourselves, and we knew that there'd be
consequences. I suppose you could say that a few pictures
making the rounds is the sort of thing we were prepared
for," said Rinka. "Frankly, I'm just relieved to know that the
fan club's president is a decent person."
"Speaking as an ordinary girl, the fact that we've got a
fan club at all's pretty embarrassing... But, I mean, after
getting up onstage and having everyone cheer us on at
yesterday's performance, it kinda feels silly to bother
getting all worked up about it anymore," said Yuna.
"Ha ha ha! True enough," Rinka agreed.
Neither of them seemed particularly worked up about any
of this—their laughter was totally natural and genuine.
Maybe that only made sense. Maybe you couldn't put on a
show like theirs and get a reaction like they had without
building up the nerve to not be bothered by a little
attention. In fact, that performance might very well have
been what prompted them to reassess their feelings on the
matter. An experience like that had to have had a major
impact.
"R-Really...?!" gasped Akksy, who had apparently been
resuscitated by their words. "So, you mean... If we ask you
to attend an official fan-club event, you'll give us the goahead?!"
"We didn't say that!"
"We did not say that!"
Oh, wow! One second she's groveling on the ground, and
the next her expectations are rocketing through the
stratosphere!
"A-A handshake, then...?" Akksy hopefully asked.
"I guess that'd be fine, sure," Yuna acquiesced.
I'd heard that the best way to get what you wanted in
negotiations was to ask for something better than it, then
gradually work your way down to your actual goal. I wasn't
sure that Akksy had been intentionally pulling that trick, but
one way or another, it had earned her a handshake from
both Yuna and Rinka.
"Bweh heh heh heh... Their hands are so silky... And wait
—since my hand just touched both of theirs, that means
they basically shook each other's hands secondhand,
right...? That's crazy..."
"I'm really not sure what's so crazy about that," Rinka
said as she held a hand out to Yuna.
"There's nothing weird about us shaking hands firsthand,
much less secondhand," Yuna agreed as she accepted it.
"Gyaaah?!" Akksy shouted, reeling back like she'd been
socked in the face by an invisible fist before crumpling to
her knees! "That's...so...lewd..."
"It was a handshake!" said Rinka.
"Maybe you could keep going and move on to a hug...?"
"And now she's asking for more from us?!" said Yuna.
Akksy had officially and entirely pulled the two of them
into her own little conversational vortex. As I tried not to
laugh, my gaze wandered, and...
Huh...?
...I glimpsed something out of the corner of my eye, in
one of the school's windows—a silhouette. It was dark, and I
wasn't totally sure, but whoever it was looked familiar.
Was that...? Could it be?!
"Hey, Yuna, Rinka!" I said. "Take care of Akksy for a
minute, please!"
"What?!" yelped Yuna.
"Take care of her how, exactly?!" asked Rinka.
"Please! Just one hug! Pleeease!" Akksy pleaded.
I left the two of them to pull her out of whatever state of
confusion she'd worked herself into and sprinted off for the
school's main building.
◇◇◇
Nighttime. A schoolhouse. The exact sort of place where
countless ghost stories had been set since time immemorial.
Rumors about music rooms and nurse's offices were
particularly prone to center around spooky supernatural
happenings...and for people like me—which is to say,
chicken-hearted cowards who ended up unable to sleep
after just watching the trailer for a horror film—they were,
without exaggeration, tremendously difficult places to be at
night, even under the best of circumstances.
The cultural festival's after-party was still in full swing, so
access to the schoolhouse wasn't currently restricted. I
probably wasn't the only one inside—a few people would be
loitering here and there in the hallways and classrooms,
most likely gazing out the windows at the bonfire. Some of
them would be taking advantage of the dark of night to,
er...spend a few intimate moments with each other, let's
say. I, however, was desperately, frantically praying that just
for now, just while I was passing by, nobody would make
any sounds or reveal any hints that they were around
whatsoever!
"Please, no ghosts... No ghosts..." I muttered under my
breath as I timidly braved the school's hallways with only
my cell phone's light to guide me.
Crash!
"Hyeeek?!"
What was that?! I definitely just heard something! Was
that one of those ghost sounds?! I know for a fact that when
you hear a weird sound in a place like this when nobody else
is around, it's basically guaranteed to be a ghost thing!
They're, like, those weird sounds that you hear when you're
home alone!
Okay, so maybe they're not supernatural happenings
after all, and the truth is just that when you're not alone the
people around you make enough noise to drown out all sorts
of little pops and creaks that happen all the time but you
can totally hear then when you're the only one around, and
they're really caused by changes in atmospheric pressure
and humidity and gradually deteriorating furniture and stuff
and have nothing to do with ghosts or anything supernatural
at all, so it's all totally natural and has nothing to do with
departed humans doing their best to contact the living and
absolutely not curse or haunt them, nope, not any sort of
threat whatsoever, and anyway schools like this get used for
decades on end so of course little bits and pieces would be
worn out all over the place and of course they'd just
naturally make sounds from time to time which of course
have nothing to do with ghosts since ghosts don't exist in
the first place, so everything's totally fine and no matter
how many times you look you won't see anything ghosty
and you'll be just fine because everything's fine and—
Clunk!
"Gyaaah?!"
Nope! Whatever that noise was, "the gradual degradation
of the building" and "spontaneous noises brought about by
ambient conditions" absolutely cannot explain it!!!
"It's all right, Yotsuba!"
My inner angel!
"Didn't your little monologue already cover this crap? You
know there's people watching the bonfire from in here—you
said it yourself!"
And my inner devil! I actually got so scared that my inner
angel and devil were dispatched to reassure me! I can
always count on them!
Crack!
"Bwaugh?!" my inner angel and my inner devil yelped in
unison as they flinched away from yet another inexplicable
sound! And since both of them were imaginary beings born
from my own mind, it goes without saying that I did the
same. I was, after all, extremely timid and easily startled by
ghos—I mean, by perfectly ordinary noises brought about by
a building's gradual degradation and other natural factors!
"Yotsuba? The school rules are very specific about not
running in the hallways, but it's nighttime, and that means
that the rules do not currently apply. Run away as fast as
possible, right this instant."
Is that really how this works, inner angel?!
"If anything gets in your way, bowl it over and keep
running!"
What do you mean "anything," inner devil?! There's
nothing here to get in my way at all! I can't see anything,
anyway! B-But then again, just because I can't see it doesn't
mean there's nothing to worry about, does it...?!
"...uch."
"!!!"
A-A voice?!
"Y-Yotsuba!"
"Haul ass!"
Spurred by the terrified voices of my inner angel and
devil, I took off down the corridor at an all-out sprint.
◇◇◇
The bonfire glimmered in the distance, its flickering light
illuminating the students gathered in jubilant celebration
around it. The girl who watched them through the window,
in contrast, seemed lonesome—and yet at the same time,
her solitude seemed self-imposed, as if she were dedicated
to rejecting anyone and everyone who might try to
approach her. At any other moment, I might have hesitated
to try.
"MAKINAAAAAAAAA!!!"
"Wha—?!"
At that particular moment, however—a moment in which
a ghost was surely breathing down my neck—I didn't have
anything even remotely close to the mental leeway to
register any of that. Kinda the opposite, actually: The
second I saw a familiar face (well, a familiar back), I
mustered up the last of my stamina to shoot forward in one
final burst of speed and hug her—no, tackle her!
"Thank...goodness..." I wheezed as I gasped for breath.
"I'm so glad it was you, Makina..."
"Y-Yotsy?!" Makina yelped.
"Halfway here, I started wondering if maybe the
silhouette I saw in the window wasn't you after all, and was
actually a ghost instead, and I got so worried, and... Wait.
You are Makina, right? You're not a ghost in disguise, right?!"
"I-It's me, really! I'm the one and only Makina Oda."
"Thank goodneeeeeess!!!" I practically wailed. Relief hit
hard as the adrenaline rush faded, leaving me more or less
dangling from her shoulders.
I'm saved... There's no doubt about it—a ghost would
never be this warm! Everyone knows that ghosts are cold!
Against all odds, I'd managed to make it to class 2-A's
room. I had no idea what Makina was doing here, or why she
hadn't bothered to turn the lights on, but I'd made it and I
could finally rest easy, in more ways than one.
"Yotsy...? What are you doing here?" Makina asked.
"What do you mean? I'm here because you are,
obviously," I replied.
Makina hesitated. "That's not true," she finally said,
shaking her head as she gently pushed me away from her.
"There's no way you could have recognized me from outside
—not when it's this dark. You said it yourself, didn't you? You
were worried that I might have been a ghost."
"Well, yeah... But it's still true that I thought it was you!
Why else would I have come here?"
If I'd given myself the time to actually think about it, I
might have stopped or turned around. The truth was,
however, that "thinking" had never entered the picture. The
moment I saw a figure in the window, my intuition had told
me it was Makina, and I'd run off without doubting that
hunch for a second. There wasn't much else that could've
driven me into the pitch-black, utterly terrifying
schoolhouse...and in the end, I really had managed to meet
with her. The process that brought me there didn't really
matter—or at least, it wouldn't change the fact that I was
glad I'd found her.
Makina's expression, however, was as glum as ever. Glum
enough to make me wonder if she hadn't wanted to see me
at all.
"Did I, umm...do something wrong?" I asked.
"Ah!" Makina gasped. "N-No, that's—"
"Wait, what am I saying? I've done so many things
wrong! Like sneaking Mio into school without telling you, for
one thing, or how you told me how you felt about me and I
still haven't..."
"No! That's not it! That's not it at all..." Makina said. She
reached out to grab my sleeve, clinging to it like it was her
only lifeline. She was trying to communicate that she didn't
want to drive me away...but even more than that, it made
me realize just how unlike herself she was behaving. There
was a frailty to her bearing that reminded me of the old
Makina—of how she'd behaved when we first met.
We've both changed. We're nothing like the people we
were back then... But that doesn't mean that there's
something wrong with acting the way we used to every once
in a while, does it?
"Makimaki?"
"Ah..."
I went out of my way to use my old nickname for her as I
grabbed onto her wrist. It wasn't a big gesture at all—just a
single word—but that was all it took for Makina's eyes to
widen with shock and transparent emotion.
"Let's sit down and talk, okay?" I suggested. Our desks
were right next to each other, and I'd shared textbooks with
her a bunch of times, but we hadn't had the chance to talk
face-to-face since she'd transferred into my class.
The classroom felt nothing like it did during the daytime.
It was just about pitch black, but my eyes had started
adjusting to the darkness and just enough light was filtering
in from the courtyard outside for me to see Makina's face.
Her expression was totally clear to me.
"Okay, go ahead!" I said. "Say whatever you want to
me!"
"Umm..." Makina hesitated.
"Lay it on me, Makimaki! Anything at all! If you want to
gripe about me, then that's fine, and if you want to talk
about something else, that's totally okay too. I mean it—you
can say anything at all...like you used to."
"Like...I used to..." Makina repeated.
"Oh, but first things first—let's work on your tone, okay?"
"Huh?"
"What's with all the hesitating? I know that being polite
and proper and thinking everything through really carefully
before you say it is just what's normal for you these
days...but honestly, it makes me feel like we're not really
connecting. It feels like you're putting up walls and keeping
me at a distance."
"Th-That's not what I was trying to—"
"Yeah, I know. I'm reading too much into it. But still...just
give it a try, okay? Try to loosen up and tell me what's really
on your mind, for me," I said. I was doing my best to do the
same—to tell her exactly how I felt, slowly but surely,
looking her in the eye with her hand still in mine.
Makina didn't try to escape, but she also couldn't quite
seem to return my gaze. Her eyes were wavering anxiously
in a way that didn't seem to be entirely under her control.
The natural response when someone was acting in a really
intense manner was to lower your own intensity level, but
the opposite was also true: When faced with someone who
was far more depressed and distressed than I was, it just
felt natural to be there for them in as gentle of a manner as
I possibly could.
"Makimaki?"
Makina hesitated for just a moment longer. "All right," she
finally said with a nod that was both clearly unintentional
and just a little too exaggerated to come across as natural.
She returned my grasp on her hand, squeezing mine
back...as a tear rolled its way down her cheek.
"I... I challenged Yuna and Rinka to a contest."
"Wait, what?"
"The stakes were that if I won, neither of them would get
in my way when I tried to flirt with you." She spoke slowly,
forcing the words out one after another.
I'd been confused this whole time about why Yuna and
Rinka had ended up joining the performance. Now I was
finally learning the truth.
"And if I lost...I would promise to never, ever approach
you in that sort of way again..."
It had all been about me. All of it—for Yuna, for
Rinka...and for Makina as well. Everything they did, they did
for my sake.
"When you got up in front of the class and said all those
things about what I wanted...that whole time, I was thinking
about how you were wrong. About how I'm not the sort of
pure and perfect person you think I am. And that's why..."
"Oh..." I said. "That's why you've felt a little distant ever
since then."
Makina looked away from me. It wasn't exactly a direct
confirmation, but for all intents and purposes, it might as
well have been.
"After I heard what you said about me, I started
questioning everything. What if you were right, and that
really was how I felt? What if I just hadn't understood my
own feelings...? I couldn't stop wondering and worrying, and
I still hadn't figured anything out by the time the
performance started...and in the end, Mio saw right through
me."
"Oooh..."
I'd had no idea that the circumstances behind Mio's
outburst were so involved...but I had suspected that
Makina's less-than-perfect performance was my fault, and
on that front, I'd been completely correct. There was no way
for me to turn a blind eye to how massive my influence was
on her anymore.
"Getting up on that stage...was harder than it'd ever
been before. I had to put on a good show. I'd lose you if I
didn't. But Yuna and Rinka had both improved so much, and
they looked so confident in the moment that I just
panicked...and then it hit me."
"What did?"
"The truth. About my own feelings... About why I decided
to propose that contest in the first place, and why I decided
to perform at the festival."
Makina's voice was so feeble, it seemed like she might
break down in tears at any second. I squeezed her hand
tightly and did my best to keep a straight face, even though
I knew that some of my own nervousness was probably
showing through regardless. I had plenty of things that I
wanted to ask and say to her, but compared to her troubles
—compared to the sheer courage and trepidation that laced
each and every word she forced herself to speak—
everything I could've brought up seemed trivial.
"You mean...you figured out why you decided to make
your contest with Yuna and Rinka be about the performance,
even though you knew there were a ton of other ways you
could've done it?" I asked.
"Right..." said Makina.
I'd learned a lesson from my bet with Mio: Using an idol
show as the subject of a contest was a lot harder than you'd
think it'd be. It wasn't like you could put a clear point value
on everyone's performances to figure out who had won and
who had lost. It was all about subjective impressions, in the
end, and even if you managed to come up with some sort of
answer, the odds were good that it wouldn't come across as
particularly compelling. I was, by the way, shocked to learn
that the three of them had had a bet of their own going on
at the same time I had, but I decided to put my surprise on
hold for the time being. That could wait till later.
"The truth is... The real reason I wanted to perform
was..." Makina began, tears once again overflowing as she
grasped my hand. "I did it...because I wanted you to see
me. I wanted you to know that I'd become one of the idols
we watched and looked up to back in the day. I wanted to
prove that I was the real thing..."
A memory resurfaced of the words I'd casually, carelessly
spoken to Makina on the day we reunited: "You really did
become an idol in the end, huh, Makimaki?" Maybe that was
the moment she'd realized I barely knew about her
achievements as Maki Amagi at all. She'd been working her
hardest for years, all for my sake, and yet I'd let all her
efforts fly over my head. I hadn't watched her—or even
noticed her.
She hadn't gotten angry at me in a way that I could tell.
She'd responded to my clueless layman's remark with a
smile. That, I knew with certainty, had been an act of
kindness on her part. She was forgiving enough to overlook
my complete lack of tact. But...that didn't mean that my
words hadn't had an effect on her. It didn't mean they
hadn't bothered her at all.
"I wanted to sing in front of you, and I wanted you to
praise me for it. I wanted you to say that I'd worked hard—
that I was talented and amazing. More than anyone else,
you're the one I've always wanted to acknowledge me now
that I'm an idol."
Each word drove a blade into my chest. My
thoughtlessness had hurt her deeply, and that pain was
directly linked to her current suffering. I felt like an idiot for
thinking that I could comfort her—that there was something
I could do to support her. How could I, when I'd been the
one causing her all that pain in the first place? Wasn't all of
this my fault, from start to finish?
"No..."
"Huh?" I grunted.
Makina shook her head. "I didn't mean to say any of this
to you. I didn't mean to whine to you like a stupid, selfish,
embarrassing little brat."
"But if you didn't tell me, how would we—"
"No, no—you don't get it. It's already over. You already
saved me."
"I... What?"
A smile spread across Makina's tearstained face. A warm,
contented smile.
"You cheered for me, didn't you...? You called my name."
Of course I had. It was the least I could have done. After
everything that had happened between us...
"That's all I needed. It made me so happy, nothing else
seemed to matter anymore. It's actually ridiculous how
stupidly happy it made me... Just like that, the most painful
performance I'd ever been a part of became the happiest
moment of my lifetime."
"Makina..."
"And that's why...I was finally able to put it all to rest."
"Put it to rest"...?
"After everything was over—I guess I can just say 'last
night,' actually—I talked with Mio again. She told me that
she'd wait for me. She'd never really complimented me to
my face like that before, you know? Not even once. Neither
of us could ever be honest with each other...but it feels like,
for the first time, she finally saw me for who I am."
Makina's voice was bright and clear. I, meanwhile, was
bewildered. I was the one who'd made her suffer...but at the
same time, she claimed that I was the one who'd freed her
from that suffering. Nothing about how she'd said it seemed
fake—not her words, and not the smile she'd worn as she
said them.
But if all that was true...then why had she looked so sad
when I first arrived in the classroom? Why had she been
avoiding me?
"Put what to rest...?" I asked.
The smile on her face felt feeble. It was the sort of
kindhearted smile that you'd wear to cover up the pain you
were feeling—in other words, a smile that proved she was
still in pain.
"I love you, Yotsy," said Makina, her smile never shifting.
"To me, you've always been light itself. I always believed
that if you went away, I wouldn't be able to live on...but that
wasn't the half of it. Performing for you made me realize
that I love you even more than I ever knew. And so..."
Makina paused to wipe away her tears.
"And so, I had to put it all to rest. I had to take some time
to sort out my feelings before I could give up on you."
With that, she let go of my hand.
"Wha... What are you...?"
"I told you, didn't I? I made a bet with Yuna and Rinka,
with my feelings for you on the line. And once it was all
over...there was no question whatsoever who had won.
Those two believed in you from the very start to the very
end. They love you in an even deeper, more profound way
than I do. I let my doubts get the better of me and put on a
pathetic excuse for a performance until the moment you
called my name—and that means I lost."
Makina admitted her defeat with grace and dignity. She
spoke so plainly, it felt like she was reciting words from a
script she'd read so many times, she'd memorized it by
rote.
"I went around the festival with some people from our
class today," Makina continued. "They invited me. I
would've preferred to look around with you, really... Hee
hee! Of course, I couldn't, right? But in the end, I couldn't
stop thinking about it. I was so preoccupied that I can't even
remember any of the things I saw and did."
A change had come over Makina. She was almost acting
like she had when we first reunited near the end of
summer...but no, that wasn't quite right. The polite, affable,
but entirely forced smile on her face was like nothing I'd
seen from her before. It was like she'd turned into a totally
different person.
"Thanks to that, I ended up dragging things out until now
without ever really accepting how it had to be...but it's the
strangest thing. Now that I've told you everything, I feel so
much...lighter. Who knew? At long last, it feels like I can
finally give up on you. Thank you for everything."
Those, it seemed, were meant to be her parting words.
Her smile never slipped as she stood up from her desk.
"Goodbye, Yotsy. Whatever happens, I hope you'll be
happy."
And then she walked away. I was certain that once she
passed by me, she'd keep going without ever looking back.
"I love you, Yotsy."
Barely a moment had passed since she'd said those
words to me. Was this really how she meant for it to end?
Would she really put a lid on those feelings and stow them
away for good?
Maybe that was the right thing for her to do. Those
feelings were where all of this had started. I hadn't known
about them, and by the time we were reunited, I was
already taken. Keeping her feelings for me alive and well,
even when she knew I loved someone else, couldn't possibly
have been easy. Maybe it would have been better for
everyone if she'd given up and gone out to look for some
other fish in the sea.
I had no right to say anything to her. I was in no position
to criticize her at all, and I knew it very well.
And yet...!
"Makina!" I shouted. "Let me ask just one thing."
By the time I raised my voice, Makina's hand was already
resting on the classroom's door. I thought she'd open it up
and walk away...but she didn't. She stopped, standing stockstill.
"What is it?" Makina asked. Her hand was still on the
door, and she didn't turn to look back at me. There wasn't a
trace of emotion to be heard in her voice, but I was just
happy that she hadn't ignored me entirely. Maybe that
happiness was part of why I suddenly felt much more
positive than when I'd first spoken up...and why I was able
to ask her the worst, most unfair question possible.
"Will this make you happy, Makina?"
"What...?"
I heard a clatter as the door shuddered. There could
hardly have been a clearer sign of how shaken she was.
"Why would...you even ask that?" Makina asked.
"Because you're lying to me," I said.
"N-No, I am not!"
"Then look me in the eye and say it again. Say that you
don't love me anymore. Say that you've given up on me!"
I really was the worst. I was toying with her feelings, and I
knew it—but I still had to ask. I had to be sure. I knew that if
I didn't—if I kicked the problem down the road again, taking
refuge in ambiguity...it would mean the end for us. We'd no
longer be anything to each other—not even childhood
friends.
I walked over to Makina and took her hand in mine once
again. Makina's shoulders shuddered, but she didn't shake
me off. Instead, she slowly turned to face me.
"Yotsy..."
Our gazes met—and instantly, the mask she'd been
wearing fell away from her face, revealing the Makina I
knew once more.
"Why won't you let me go...? Don't you understand? You
won't ever love me, so...so why?!"
"It's not like that," I said. "You have it all wrong."
"Do I?! How?! You're not— You won't...!"
"I do love you, Makina! Maybe not in exactly the way you
wished I would...but that doesn't mean you're not important
to me! It doesn't mean I don't want you to be happy, from
the bottom of my heart!"
I was an idiot. What was right and what was wrong were
just two of the many, many things I didn't understand.
There was one thing, however, that I understood with
absolute clarity: If I let Makina leave, both of us would come
to regret it.
"Yes, I'm already in a relationship. I may be a dirty
cheater, but I still can't bring myself to betray Yuna and
Rinka," I said.
"So then—"
"But I know we don't have to be dating to stay together!
There has to be a way!" I shouted. My emotions were
overflowing...and before I knew it, I'd thrown my arms
around her. "We can still love each other in our own ways,
and still be happy. It may take time, but someday, it'll
happen... I'm sure of it. It has to be true. It'd be just...way
too sad if it wasn't."
"What do you mean 'sad'...?"
"Well, come on! We just reunited, didn't we?! Back when
you went away, I thought I'd never see you again, but you
came to find me... And okay, yes, I was pretty confused for
all sorts of reasons, but I was still really happy, and it's been
just as fun as it's been a problem to have you around! I've
never, ever, even for a second wished that you hadn't
shown up again, and I'd be lonely if you left! I don't want
that! It'd be sad, and painful...just like it was the first time."
I was distraught when Makina moved away, but I was also
a completely helpless little kid. There hadn't been anything
at all I could do about it...and since her absence was so
heart-wrenchingly painful, I'd fallen back on the only
solution I could find: forgetting about her. Looking back, I
didn't think that had been the right decision by any means.
I'd made the wrong choice once, and I never wanted to
make it again.
"What about you, Makina...?" I said. "Do you hate me
now? Would you be happy if you never saw me again?"
"Of course...not...!" Makina just barely managed to choke
out.
"Well...then don't go! If neither of us wants the other to
go away—if it'd make both of us sad—then why do it? Why
not stay together instead?"
I couldn't be the lover that Makina wanted me to be. I'd
agonized over it ever since the day she opened up about
her feelings for me, and that was the decision I'd
reached...but did my inability to return her feelings really
have to mean we couldn't be around each other anymore?
Then again, ignoring her feelings and acting like we were
friends in the same way we'd always been wasn't tenable
either. Things couldn't be that easy.
I'd thought, and thought, and thought...and while I
couldn't quite say with confidence that the conclusion I'd
landed on was a real answer to the problem, it was all I had.
"I don't know how our feelings will change from now on,"
I said, "but as long as we're together, we'll always be
something to each other. Maybe not lovers, or friends, or
even childhood friends...but something else. We could be
something special, just for the two of us—no, we would be!
I'm sure of it! I don't know what I'd call it, but I'm sure... All I
want is for me to keep being someone special for you, and
for you to keep being someone special for me."
"Someone special...just for us...?"
"That's right. Something even deeper than just being
childhood friends, I'd bet!"
I couldn't rule out the possibility that Makina would get
sick of me someday, of course. It was very possible that
we'd end up living in completely different worlds in the long
term. In that moment, however, I didn't have the time for
that sort of pessimism. In that moment, at the very least—a
moment in which we still loved each other—I had confidence
that the future could never possibly be so bleak.
When all was said and done, I was just being selfish.
Maybe Makina could go on to lead a perfectly happy,
fulfilled life without me. I sure as heck could never be stuckup enough to think that she couldn't live a happy life
without me! But that didn't change the fact that I wanted to
stay with her. I didn't want to have to go through another
tearful parting. Even if we did say our goodbyes someday, I
wanted it to be in a mutual sort of way that both of us could
accept.
That was the answer I'd settled on. It was the conclusion
of the long, long train of thought I'd been traveling along
ever since the day I learned how Makina felt about me. I
knew painfully well how hopelessly naive a conclusion it was
to expect, but I also knew that not being true to your
feelings about the things that were really important to you
would always lead to regrets. No matter how much it made
you look like an idiot, no matter how ashamed it left you,
you had to be honest—to make it perfectly clear exactly
how you felt.
After all...she'd done it as well. Makina had worked up
more courage than I could ever even imagine, all to tell me
that she loved me.
Makina and I stood there hugging for quite some time.
I'm not really sure how long, exactly—long enough that by
the time she said, "Thank you, Yotsy," and pulled away, the
only evidence left that she'd been crying was the wet spot
where she'd used my uniform as an impromptu
handkerchief. Well, that and the fact that her eyelids were
slightly swollen, probably from when she'd rubbed them.
"But still," Makina continued, "I just can't..."
"Huh?"
"I made a promise with those two. I told them I wouldn't
act like this with you anymore if I lost...and I know that if I'm
around you, I won't be able to control myself. I'll just end up
wanting you all over again..." Makina flashed me a slightly
awkward smile. Not the fake smile she'd used to hide her
feelings—this time, it was genuine. "Staying with you would
mean that I lied to the people who're most important to you.
I just know you'd get hurt in the end... And so..."
"Who said anything about you losing?"
"...What?" I grunted.
That hadn't been my voice, or Makina's either. I jerked
my head over to look in the direction it had come from—and
saw an eye peering into the classroom through the cracked
door!
"Hyeeeeeek?!"
"Wh-What the— Yotsy?!" Makina yelped as I reeled back,
tripped, and fell flat on my butt, pulling her down with me in
the process!
"Excuse me, Yotsuba! What sort of person falls over from
seeing their girlfriend's face?" the voice rang out again.
"Honestly, I can't blame her this time. The look on your
face is a little scary right now, Yuna," a second voice
interjected.
"It so is not!"
The door slid open with a clatter, revealing Yuna and
Rinka! B-But wait—why are they here...?
"Did you really think we wouldn't worry after you ran off
like that?" Yuna said, answering my question before I could
ask it.
"It would have been much harder to follow you if
Koganezaki hadn't happened to pass by right after you left.
We were able to foist the president on her," Rinka explained.
Saved by a passing Koganezaki! I wonder if she realized
that Akksy had gone on a rampage and went to search for
her? Thanks, Koganezaki, for so many things... Wait, no! Not
the time!
"H-How much did you hear?!" I asked.
"Hmm..." Yuna broke eye contact.
"You know, that's a good question..." Rinka also broke
eye contact.
Eye contact broken! Twice!!! That definitely means they
were listening from the very start, or at least caught all the
juicy bits!
"Just for the record, it's not like we think eavesdropping's
A-okay or anything," Yuna quickly added in a flustered
mutter. "But it really didn't feel like the right moment for us
to come in either..."
"And leaving didn't feel much better," Rinka noted as
well. "Someone had to be here to intervene in case things
took a turn for the worse—not that that was likely, of
course."
Apparently, my horrified stare had freaked them out so
much they'd felt the need to offer excuses to me. They were
acting a lot like I usually did, actually! I hadn't been
planning on blaming them to begin with—after all, I knew
that I would've done the same thing if I'd been in their
position—but I was curious about why they'd decided to
make their entrance now in particular.
"So anyway, Makina," said Yuna, "who said anything
about you losing? Since when was that a done deal?"
"Well...it was obvious. I conceded defeat myself," Makina
replied.
"But that wasn't our arrangement, was it?" said Rinka.
"We agreed that we'd determine who won from the surveys
that we'd have the audience fill out. I don't recall anyone
ever saying that our personal opinions would be weighed in
the final outcome. Do you?"
O-Oh! Is that how it was supposed to work? That makes
so much more sense than how we did our bet!
"And our classmates were nice enough to get those
survey results all compiled before the festival was even
over," said Yuna. "It's all up in our group chat—though
considering how you've been acting so far, I think I can
hazard a guess that you haven't seen it yet."
"Everyone took the time to fill those surveys out for us.
It'd be a shame to not at least take a glance at them before
you decide that you've lost, wouldn't it?" said Rinka.
Makina seemed bewildered, but she gave Yuna and Rinka
a nod, then pulled out her phone. I assumed she was
looking at the class chat, and I checked my own phone to
follow her example.
"Wait...does this mean...?" I muttered. Our class rep had
read and summarized all of the surveys from the
performance, and the moment I read her summary, I found
myself reflexively looking over at Makina. She was standing
in total silence, eyes wide as she stared at her phone's
screen. I had to look back and reread the message myself,
just to make sure I wasn't misunderstanding something.
In short: Basically nobody at all had written about which
performer they thought had put on the best show.
Somehow, astonishingly, there were almost no submissions
that only talked about how great the Sacrosanct were or
how amazing it had been to see a real idol. The
overwhelming majority of the surveys had given the show
rave reviews and said that all three performers were
incredible. Some of them singled out the band and the
organizing staff for praise too, of course. Overall, the
compliments couldn't have been more universal.
"Turns out we were all thinking about this in the wrong
way," said Yuna.
"What...?" said Makina.
"This was a performance, not a contest. Performances
aren't supposed to have a winner, are they? Of course the
audience wouldn't think they needed to pick one of us to
single out as being the best. They thought that all of us
were good, and that's good enough for me."
"And, looking at it from another perspective, this feels like
a pretty clear sign that none of our performances stood
head and shoulders above the others," Rinka added.
"Maybe the fact that a professional idol like you didn't
manage to overwhelm a pair of amateurs like us feels like a
failing from your perspective, but when you consider that
the audience was made up exclusively of our teachers and
classmates—people who've known us on a personal level for
over a year longer than they've known you—I would say it
starts feeling like we were the ones with a leg up, actually.
Which means..."
Rinka paused for a moment to glance at Yuna. Yuna
flashed her a rather confident smile and nodded.
"...our 'see who can get the most positive reviews from
the audience' contest...has ended in a draw."
The way Rinka delivered the news couldn't have been
more different from how Makina had announced her loss to
me moments before. She spoke so perfectly casually and
matter-of-factly, you would've thought it didn't matter to her
at all.
"A...draw...?" Makina repeated. "But...why? I already
conceded my loss..."
"Rules are rules, right? That's just how it goes," said
Yuna. "Oh, and you can't concede after the results are
already out! That's definitely not something the rules allow."
Makina had admitted defeat—only for Yuna and Rinka to
reject it. The match was a draw. No winners, no losers.
"Why are you doing this?" asked Makina. "Why would you
help your own enemy...?"
"Maybe because we don't see you as an enemy in the
first place?" said Yuna.
"Huh?"
"Right," said Rinka. "You're our fellow performer...but I
guess the show's over now, so that doesn't exactly apply
anymore. A friend in the making, maybe? Definitely not an
enemy, in any case."
"But—"
"No buts!" Yuna snapped, jabbing a finger into the tip of
Makina's nose. "And for the record, we're not saying we lost
either, okay?! It was a draw, meaning we're back to square
one! We're still Yotsuba's girlfriends, and we're still never
gonna give that spot up to you!"
"If you have a problem with that, you can always
challenge us again—" Rinka said before pausing for a beat.
"On second thought, maybe not. I think I've had enough of
those. Performing with you was fun, sure, but it was just as
hard and exhausting..."
"Wha— Rinka?!" Yuna yelped. "You could've kept that to
yourself! This was wrapping up so nicely, and you totally
ruined the vibe!"
"Well, it's true, isn't it? You remember how weirdly tense
the stress made us back in the beginning, don't you? It was
bad enough to make Yotsuba worry about us! I think one
experience like that per year is plenty."
"Okay, when you put it that way, once a year actually
sounds a little too much for my liking... Yeah, I'm on board.
Peace and quiet's the better option for sure!"
Yuna and Rinka had bantered their way right through
what would've been the appropriate moment for Makina to
respond to them. She just stood there in a daze, staring at
them with a blank, uncomprehending look on her face.
This, I imagined, was a sort of logic that Makina was
totally unfamiliar with. The way Yuna and Rinka saw it,
everyone involved had wagered something important to
them, everyone involved had done their best, and they'd all
managed to make something great together as a result. The
actual contest had become an afterthought, at most. That
probably seemed unthinkable to Makina.
All that said, not being too bothered about the contest
was by no means a sign that Yuna and Rinka weren't taking
this seriously in their own right. I still wasn't exactly sure of
how or why they'd ended up playing along with it all in the
first place...but as long as they were satisfied with these
results, I wasn't about to question them.
"Well, you heard them, Makina," I cheerfully chimed in,
giving Makina a pat on the shoulder for good measure.
"Yotsy..." Makina replied. The look on her face was
conflicted. From what I could tell, it wasn't that she couldn't
accept the challenge's lack of an outcome or Yuna and
Rinka's refusal to acknowledge her concession—it was that
she couldn't understand their mindset, period.
I, on the other hand, instantly understood both the
feelings of the audience members who'd filled out the
surveys and Yuna and Rinka's ultimate decision. They all
just made sense to me. At the very least, it felt like a much
less tragic outcome than Makina having to live with her loss
on her own.
"Ah, look! Look!" Yuna suddenly shouted as she glanced
out the window.
"Oh! Fireworks," Rinka observed.
I could see them as well. A number of students had
started lighting up fireworks around the bonfire. Not, like,
big rockets that burst in the air, of course. They were
playing with the smaller sort of fireworks that you held in
your hand or that stayed mostly on the ground.
"They're so pretty..." I said. "A little hard to see well from
here, though."
"Should we go outside to watch?" asked Makina.
"Nah... I think I'm fine here, actually," I replied, shaking
my head as I took her hand and gave it a squeeze. If we
went outside, then she, Yuna, and Rinka would all attract a
ton of attention. Maybe it was selfish of me, but I wanted to
keep this moment just for the four of us. That way, all three
of them would hopefully be able to be their normal, natural
selves.
"Yotsy...is it really okay for me to stay with you?" asked
Makina.
"Yeah," I said. "Of course it is."
"Not as her girlfriend, though! Those seats are already
taken!" Yuna interjected.
"And knowing Yotsuba, if we let her pull any more seats
up to the table she'd never stop," Rinka noted.
"Does nobody have any faith in me?!" I wailed. And is
that why they've been bringing this up so much recently?!
Sure, I've really expanded my social circle lately, but that's
just because I'm finally making friends! There's nothing
deeper to it than that...right?
"Heh heh..." Makina chuckled, a smile finally spreading
across her face. "When you put it that way, it does seem
like being her girlfriend isn't the easiest thing in the world."
Had Rinka's words seemed just that convincing to her?
The face-value meaning of Makina's statement was hardly
any different from what she'd said moments before about
giving up on me...but this time, it somehow came across as
far, far more positive.
"But, no...I'll be trying to build up a relationship with Yotsy
that's just for the two of us," Makina added, squeezing my
hand back. The smile on her face wasn't like anything I'd
seen from her—or at least, not recently. It was an innocent
sort of smile. Almost childish.
The way I understood it, Makina was simply reaffirming
the words I'd spoken to her earlier. Buuut...
"Was that supposed to be some sort of shot at us?" Yuna
commented.
"Hee hee hee! I wonder?" Makina replied.
...Yuna and Rinka clearly hadn't taken it in quite the same
way I had. For a moment, an almost electrical tension
crackled in the air...but it vanished away again just as
quickly.
"Ah, look! They lit up a big one!" I shouted. Someone had
set up one of those fireworks that shoots a big, colorful
burst of sparks up from the ground, which was now shining
away in the courtyard.
"Oh, wow!" said Yuna.
"Oooh..." Rinka cooed.
"It really is pretty...isn't it?" said Makina.
For a moment, we were captivated. It wasn't exactly the
same sort of festive atmosphere that the students frolicking
in the courtyard had going, but on the other hand, there was
something sort of classy about silently watching fireworks
from off in the distance.
And that was exactly what we did. Past that point, none
of us said a word as we gazed out through the window,
watching the festival's final hurrah unfold.
Looking back over the past two months—the span of time
since Makina transferred into our school—it felt like my
relationships with the three of them hadn't really changed
all that much, in the end. Yuna, Rinka, and I were still in the
same three-way, two-timing relationship as ever, and
Makina was still my childhood friend, her feelings for me
kept in a state of unanswered limbo.
That said, it wasn't like there hadn't been any changes.
The three of them had grown a little closer over the course
of their preparations for the idol show, for one thing. I'd
befriended Mukai and Akksy, seen a new side of Koganezaki,
reaffirmed the fact that Emma was a certifiable angel,
gotten a few chances to dote on Sakura and Aoi, and had
Mio lead me around by the nose. Looking back, it'd all been,
well... How to put it...?
"Haaaaaah..."
In such perfect unison you'd think we'd planned it in
advance, all four of us let out a long, synchronized sigh.
Normally that would've probably surprised me, but at that
particular moment, the wave of exhaustion rolling over me
dulled whatever shock I might've felt. And, before I knew it,
we'd all burst into a fit of tired, listless laughter.
"This has all been a lot, huh?" said Yuna.
"No kidding," Rinka agreed.
"And now the cultural festival is over," said Makina.
I just quietly listened...and thought to myself about how
I'd sleep more soundly tonight than I had in a very, very
long time.