Dinner that evening was fairly quiet, as usual, especially since not only the crown prince but also the empress were present. Everything could have ended well, but that was without counting on the latter's sharp tongue.
"Now that the eldest is settled, what do you plan to do with the youngest?"
Selen avoided looking in the direction of her half-sister, who she knew was surely looking pitiful. The room was plunged into silence; it seemed that no one had expected this question. Selen sighed; she was going to have to make up for it.
"I'm sure Father will find a suitable suitor for Arie," I replied.
"Suitable, you say? Are you referring to her disability? Poor little thing, yes, it will take a man of great kindness to want you, but as they say, there's all sorts in this world, isn't there?"
The empress then let out a cruel laugh. Selen knew that she was only taking out her anger on the weakest member of the assembly, all while humiliating her mother by reminding her that she would also have to arrange the marriage of her bastard stepdaughter.
"Damian, your assessment to join the Holy Guard is in a month, isn't it?"
The duke had decided to change the subject, but although it was certainly a good way to divert attention, it remained a thorny issue nonetheless.
In the empire, magical power was rare due to the absence of saint, and few were born with enormous magical power within them. To join the Holy Guard, one had to be able to heal at least minor wounds and be capable of launching magical attacks. The Ravenhurt family always had at least one son or daughter in the Holy Guard, and sometimes they even rose to become captain of the guard. The problem was that Damian had no magical potential.
"I'll do my best, Father, but as you know..."
The duchess had defused what was sure to be an explosive debate between father and son with a single glance. As reckless as he was, Damian quickly recovered and decided it was best not to air the family's dirty laundry in public.
The rest of the evening was a complete mystery to Selen. She had a lot on her mind, most of it related to her schedule. She had to be ready for her coming-of-age ceremony, which would soon be held, where her engagement to the prince would be officially announced, and then they would be married two months later.
Lying in bed that night, Selen thought back on her life so far. She had studied politics, etiquette, and everything else to become the next empress, so of course she was happy...
The night before the coming-of-age ceremony
"Princess Arie wishes to speak with you, princess."
Selen removed the rose-scented mask from her face and turned to the servant standing before her.
"Could you repeat that? Who do you say wants to speak with me?"
Selen saw the servant's face pale. She must have thought, like the rest of the kingdom, that she hated her half-sister. The reason she thought she had misheard was because her half-sister had never made the effort to come to her, and that suited her fine.
"I'll talk to her."
The servant almost ran off. She didn't know why her sister wanted to talk to her, but it wouldn't change her schedule much. They would talk while her face dried and the mask was absorbed, and then she would have to go to bed. Tomorrow would be the big day for her, and she couldn't have a trace of fatigue on her face.
"I'll leave you now, princesses."
After the maid who had accompanied her sister had slipped away, Selen adopted an impatient posture so that Anie would talk quickly about what had brought her there.
"Good evening, Selen. I... I came to give you this."
Selen looked down at the package Anie was holding out to her and gave her a questioning look.
"I know you hate me and that I'm not welcome in this house, but I wanted to congratulate you on your ceremony tomorrow and your engagement to the prince."
Selen laughed sarcastically.
"You know you're not welcome here, but you've never asked to leave, have you? You know what's always annoyed me about you? Your little game of playing the saint. If you'd been an unbearable person who was only here for the family money, I would have liked that much more than this victim role you love to play."
Selen expected her to burst into tears, but she smiled at her, a sad smile that Selen didn't understand.
"Do you know how I became lame, Selen?"
"So you're going to continue with your game of..."
"I tried to kill myself."
Selen was so shocked by this statement that she forgot to keep her composure.
"I failed, but my mother didn't. The duke found me dying at the bottom of the mountain where my mother and I had jumped, and then he offered to make me his daughter."
Selen didn't know what to say or why Arie had decided to tell her all this after five years of living apart.
"I knew I wouldn't be welcome or loved, but I came anyway because I wanted to live. I... I'm not playing a role, and I'm not a victim. I chose to live because I was too cowardly to carry out my mother's last wish."
"I don't know what you want me to say, but I didn't know any of this..."
-I didn't tell you all this to get your sympathy, but rather so that you would understand that I'm not as selfish as you would like me to be. The truth is, I may be the most selfish person you know, but I won't apologize for it.
Selen didn't understand Arie's last words, and when she tried to ask her for more explanation, Arie shoved the package she was holding into her arms and turned to leave. To Selen's surprise, Arie stopped just a few steps from the door and turned back to her.
"I really hope everything will go well for you Selen."
Selen sighed as the door closed. All she needed was her half-sister's cryptic words to top it all off. She was already stressed enough about tomorrow's ceremony and decided, for her own physical and mental well-being, to forget about this evening's conversation.
The long-awaited day dawned, much to Selen's relief. The ceremony was to take place outside in the winter garden, and most of the guests were already there. The queen of the day made her entrance accompanied by her father, the duke, and drank the red wine served in the cup specially ordered from the temple. The emperor approached them and stood next to Selen. When she finished drinking the wine, her father gave a speech and officially presented her as a young woman.
Generally, the coming-of-age ceremony meant that a woman or man was ready for marriage, but in Selen's case...
"Your attention, please," exclaimed the emperor.
Selen held her breath. This was it. She had imagined this moment so many times. The prince rose from his seat and came to stand before Selen.
"I, Arthur Artheris, emperor of the kingdom of Belladore, officially announce the engagement and imminent marriage of Princess Selen Ravenhurt and Crown Prince Light Artheris. The couple will be blessed here by the chief priest, His Lordship Lumiel Delacore.
Selen took the hand offered to her by the prince, and then a light even more blinding than the sun appeared before her. In her entire life, Selen had never felt anything like this before. Her body felt extremely hot, and she felt as if something was taking possession of her body. She trembled and screamed, but she didn't know if it was from pain or pleasure. She felt new, as if she had simply been reborn.
"It's a miracle!" someone cried.
"It's the saint. The saint is among us," cried another.
When Selen came to, she was in Light's arms, and he was looking at her with eyes full of astonishment. She almost burst out laughing because she couldn't believe he was capable of such an expression.
"Move aside, let the priest through," cried a voice that Selen recognized as that of the emperor.
She realized she was surrounded by several people, including her brother, who literally wanted to tear her from the prince's arms. The priest pushed his way through and placed a trembling hand on her forehead, then turned to the emperor.
"The long-awaited saint is among us." He then turned to Selen and took both her cheeks in his hands. "The kingdom has been waiting for you, saint."
Two months ago...
Selen sat in her newlywed bedroom, waiting for Light to join her. She had spent the last two months between the palace and the temple. The more she thought about it, the more it seemed wrong. Why had she become the saint? She, who had never done a good deed in her entire life, of all people. Yet over the past two months, she had made numerous appearances as a saint and had used her powers many times to heal several people. Her power flowed through her to the point of overflowing, whereas before she had barely been able to use the basics of magic.
"His Majesty will be here soon," a servant told her before leaving.
Selen barely glanced at her; she had been anxious for several weeks.Something was wrong. She had awakened her powers as a saint two months ago, yet magic had still not returned to the kingdom, the harvests had not improved, and famine was still rampant.
She was powerful, she could feel it, but she did not know how her mere presence would save an entire kingdom. She had spoken about it, or rather tried to speak about it to the priest several times, but he always told her to be patient. Lacking information from him, she had gone to all the great libraries in the palace to search for the truth, but none of them told precisely how the saint accomplished all these miracles. Selen had never had a third sense, strictly speaking, but something frightened her, and she didn't know why. Everything was going well; she had become the saint loved by all and the empress she had always wanted to be.
She was so lost in her thoughts that she didn't hear the prince enter. She forgot all her questions and tried to focus on her husband. He had just taken a shower and was wearing a bathrobe. He came and sat down next to her and took her hand.
"You seem anxious, Selen."
"It's nothing, just the worries of a newlywed."
"That's good, then," replied the prince before touching her face with the back of his hand. He began to kiss her vigorously, and she let herself be guided.
She did not feel much for the prince, but it was her duty as empress and she would not shirk it. She felt a pinch in her arm and just as she was about to pull away to check if something had bitten her, she found herself unable to move. She was paralyzed and she realized that the prince was responsible for her condition when he got up, leaving her alone in bed.
"What the hell is going on?" she thought to herself as she lay half-naked in the enormous bed.
She then heard the door open again. Unable to move a muscle, she had to wait for the newcomer to introduce himself.
Imagine her surprise when she saw the face of the newcomer, who was none other than her brother Damian.
"Can she hear us?" he asked someone behind him, who must have been the prince.
"Yes, the priest said it was a hundred times more powerful than horse anesthetic, and yet she will remain conscious."
"No surprise coming from our dear great saint," replied Damian. "Do you have the handcuffs?"
"Yes, here they are. The priest said the effect would last a maximum of two hours, so put them on her before we start."
She couldn't see, but she felt her brother move to handcuff her hands to the bed.
"There we go. Our saint is ready for her wedding night."
Selen felt the handcuffs burning her hands despite the famous anesthetic she had been injected with. She felt nauseous and her thoughts were scattered. Why had her brother and the prince tied her up? What were these handcuffs and why had they drugged her? She wanted to scream with all her might for someone to explain. Nothing was more painful than finding herself in a situation where everyone knew what was going on except her.
If the situation was confusing, it became even more so when, instead of the prince, her brother climbed onto the bed and began to undress. She lay there watching him, praying with all her might that what she imagined was not what was about to happen.
It's a nightmare, it's just a bad dream, wake up Selen, usually we wake up before the climax of a nightmare out of fear, so why am I not waking up, she thought to herself as helpless tears streamed down her numb face.
"I've always imagined this moment, little sister. I never thought my dream would come true," Damian whispered in her ear.
He kissed her on the forhead.
Selen understood then. It wasn't a nightmare. No nightmare could hurt this much.