Extra Chapter: Gudaguda Honnoji Avengers.
After the restoration of the London singularity, Chaldea was filled with noise due to the influx of new Servants, but otherwise, time flowed peacefully and without any particular incidents.
Of course, Deadpool, who was the main source of this "noise," continued to patrol the corridors tirelessly to ensure that this status quo was not disturbed.
"How boring... maybe I should visit the kid?" he muttered, picking his non-existent nostril, trusting his instincts, and headed towards Ritsuka's room.
"Hey, kid, I'm here! Anything fun going on?" Deadpool barged in unceremoniously without knocking. Ritsuka flinched in surprise and hastily hid the manga he was engrossed in. Due to the sudden appearance, and the red costume, he momentarily mistook the guest for "Mommy Archer."
"Wade, is it really that hard to knock?"
"Oh, oh, oh, our sweet kid is scared that his big brother will catch him masturbating! So, what interesting thing were you reading? Doujinshi, I bet?"
In response to the teasing, Ritsuka finally pulled out the book. It was an American comic from Chaldea's library – a fresh issue that came out just before the world was burned.
"Hmm? Hmm-hmm... I see. But why aren't you reading comics about me?"
"Wade, do you appear in comics too?" Ritsuka was genuinely puzzled.
Deadpool hesitated. Should he explain this? Would the guy believe that he was an irregular Servant, a comic book hero, literally descended from the pages? On the other hand, since the books themselves had materialized as Heroic Spirits, there shouldn't be any problems with the explanation.
"What, you're not aware of how famous I am? Kid, they even made movies based on these comics about me! Two of them! And both, despite their low budget, broke global records! Oh, well, don't be jealous. Enough applause, I'm getting embarrassed!"
Watching Deadpool spin his own yarn and writhe like a snake from feigned modesty, Ritsuka just gave a wry smile, trying to steer away from the awkward conversation.
"So you're reading 'The Avengers'? Damn! I wanted to be in there too! But as soon as it went towards the climax, the companies teamed up!"
Snatching the volume of "The Avengers" from Ritsuka, Deadpool began to theatrically lament his exclusion, putting on a whole show with exaggerated sobs.
"Uh... so you are a hero after all?"
"Do I look like a hero? Have you ever seen a normal hero who wears red spandex, shoots everywhere, and chops people into kebabs with a couple of swords?"
Deadpool stared at him menacingly. Ritsuka first nodded, then immediately shook his head.
"So, is it 'yes' or 'no'?"
"I... I don't know."
"Hey! You there!" Deadpool addressed the void. "You definitely know! Well, tell him: do I look like a hero? Yes, for my beloved girl, I hacked up bad guys and did my best to save one kid, preventing him from becoming a villain, but deep down, I'm a merciless killer! Understand? Formally, I'm called an anti-hero, but the essence is the same: if someone deserves death – I'll kill him! I'm not that guy in the bat costume who runs around with his principles and only breaks bones. Ah, well, maybe my dear Spidey is an exception. He's always an exception. Okay?"
This time, the session of talking to the void dragged on. Ritsuka involuntarily pondered, recalling Solomon's words in London: were they really being watched by someone from another dimension?
Their heated discussion was interrupted by a sudden jolt – Chaldea shook, and an alarm siren wailed.
"[Uh... guys, did any of you touch the ley shift installation?]"
Romani came online. With a very puzzled look, he scratched his head, trying to figure out the culprit. Da Vinci immediately chimed in and, without a hint of doubt, lashed out at Deadpool:
"[It was you, wasn't it? I knew it! As soon as you... wait, not you?]"
Seeing Deadpool on the screen, calmly sitting next to Ritsuka, engrossed in comics, Da Vinci was taken aback. Deadpool, not missing a beat, put down his book and let out a demonstrative laugh.
"Ha! It wasn't me! What do you say now? As soon as something happens, you immediately point the finger at me! Your suspicion will be your downfall. So, how's your vaunted deduction doing now, huh? Tut-tut, who's made such a mess here?"
Da Vinci gritted her teeth at his smug grin, but there was no time for bickering.
"[Now is not the time! Chaldea is detecting an emission of unidentified mana sources! Go on reconnaissance immediately!]"
"Senpai, let's go!"
Mash burst into the room like a whirlwind right after the order.
"Hi, Mash. How was breakfast?"
"Yes. For breakfast, there was miso soup, white rice, cabbage pickled in gochujang, and fried potatoes."
Despite the rush, Mash answered Ritsuka's sudden question about breakfast with complete composure.
"Uh... actually, cabbage in gochujang is called kimchi. Do you know kimchi?"
"[Kimchi is a Korean dish of fermented vegetables that came to look like this after the appearance of chili peppers in the sixteenth century... What does breakfast have to do with it?!]"
Romani almost got drawn into a lecture but came to his senses in time.
"Alright, alright. Let's go already. We need to earn our rations," Deadpool grumbled, picking his ear, and lazily ambled towards Chaldea, from where mana was gushing out.
"So, what happened? Another traitor among the staff? Or terrorists with 'religious' motives?"
"I don't know myself. All I know is that the ley shift installation started by itself."
Already in full combat readiness, Mash ran down the corridor with Deadpool and Ritsuka. The magical background was off the charts just around the corner. Not knowing if they would encounter a Servant or a monster, they cautiously pressed themselves against the wall.
"Dep-pu!"
"Oops!"
Something small suddenly jumped right onto Ritsuka's face. Mash, thinking it was an attack by a small imp, quickly detached the creature and grabbed it by the scruff of its neck.
"What... what is this?"
"Huh?"
Mash and Deadpool stared with wide eyes at the tiny, painfully familiar creature.
"Dep! Dep! Dep-pu!"
The creature, which was desperately flailing and making incomprehensible cute sounds, was Deadpool. Or rather, an extremely adorable, miniaturized, and distorted copy of him.
"Deadpool!"
"Pulchik!"
"Wade!"
Da Vinci-chan, Mash, and Ritsuka shouted it simultaneously. Looking at the scene, their suspicions that Deadpool was the culprit of the incident instantly turned into firm conviction.
"It wasn't me!" he protested. "And anyway, why do you think this thing looks like me? I'm not that cute at all!"
"Well... in art history, such a form is called 'deformation'..."
"Now is not the time to quote Wikipedia!"
Deadpool was offended. Of course, he liked minor pranks, but to touch an unknown device for quantum transfer... Or did he want to?
"Hey! Author, are you going the same way?!"
Oops. My bad. Correcting myself.
"In any case! It wasn't me! Do you hear me?!"
He continued to stubbornly and capriciously insist, but to little avail. However, before appointing him guilty and calling him to account, the consequences needed to be dealt with. The trial could wait.
However, another problem arose.
"Nobu-u!"
"Huh?"
Another tiny creature of a different form appeared. It wore something like an old military uniform, and instead of one eye, there was a void. The little one, shouting "Nobu-nobu," cheerfully walked past and got into a scuffle with the little Deadpool – or, as he was nicknamed, Little Pool.
"And this wasn't me either! I swear on Uncle Ben!"
Deadpool put his thumb to his forehead, expecting another dose of sidelong glances. But Mash and Ritsuka had no time for him: they could barely dodge the swords flying towards this very Nobu.
"Oh, please excuse my manners. If left unsupervised, they start multiplying uncontrollably."
A woman with a short haircut, dressed in a pink kimono in calm tones, swung her sword, casually slicing through Nobu and Little Pool.
"Who are you?" Mash and Ritsuka asked in unison, stunned by her sudden appearance.
"Ah, yes. I am Oki... I mean, Sakura Saber. A breach opened in our world, I rushed in pursuit, and ended up here."
Introducing herself as Sakura Saber, she began to rapidly mow down entire crowds of arriving Nobu and Little Pools.
"H-hey! Don't you dare leave me behind! You're always rushing headlong!"
Following her, a little girl appeared in the exact same outfit as Nobu, armed with a sword and a firearm. Despite her rather modern appearance, her manner of speech was quite archaic.
"And who are you then?"
In response to the question from the stunned Ritsuka, the red-eyed girl grinned widely, ear to ear:
"Behold! I am the Ruler of the Sixth Heaven, Oda Nobu... I mean, just Archer Mao!"
She also preferred to introduce herself by a nickname rather than her real name. It seemed there was some story behind it, but the priority now was clearing the corridors of hordes of Nobu and Little Pools. And then another guest appeared.
"Phew! They're endless! Mr. Stark will kill me if he finds out! I need to fix everything quickly! Uh... Miss Okita? Mr... Nobunaga? Wait for me!"
When a guy appeared, who blurted out all the names at once, Deadpool's eyes bulged as if he had seen someone who shouldn't exist in this world.
"Could it be?"
"Huh?!"
The young man in the red and blue suit, embroidered with a black web pattern, froze. His lenses with the automatic focusing mechanism widened when he stared at Deadpool.
"Uh... are you Deadpool?"
"And you're Spider-Man?!"
A moment of silence. This silent moment made even Okita... Sakura Saber, Nobu... Archer Mao, and the whole crowd of Nobu and Little Pools fall silent.
"O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O!!"
"U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U!!" Whispering:
"Heh-heh, my scream has more letters!"
Both with joyful cries, they rushed towards each other and merged in an embrace. As if meeting an old mentor after a long separation, they spun around embracing in the narrow corridor of Chaldea.
"Senpai... what's going on at all?"
"What a mess... Complete gudaguda... I mean, a mess..."
Mash and Ritsuka, dumbfounded, watched the touching reunion. They silently watched the pair, who had been spinning in ecstasy for a good ten minutes, completely failing to understand the reasons for such delight.
"W-wait! Time out! B-e... Mr. Stark... I feel a bit unwell... B-e-e-e!"
"O-oh... my head is spinning... U-e-ek!!"
In the end, the excess centrifugal force took its toll, and both began to feel nauseous.
"What? So you know each other?" Archer Mao asked when the strange atmosphere had slightly dissipated.
"We know each other... Well, in a sense, probably, yes?" Spider-Man replied.
"Likewise! Although... we're seeing each other in person for the first time..."
"So, you know who is who?"
To Archer Mao's question, both answered with absolute certainty:
"Wade Wilson! Also known as Deadpool!"
"Peter Parker! Your, my, our common favorite, friendly neighborhood Spider-Man!"
As soon as they uttered each other's names and nicknames, the crowd of Nobu and Little Pools erupted in a joyful squeal and began to multiply so rapidly that they filled the entire corridor.
"Let's... deal with this first, and then we'll get acquainted..." Sakura Saber managed to say, who was suddenly pressed against the wall by a mass of small creatures.