I lay on my bed, staring at the ceiling as if it might finally collapse and end this quiet suffering of mine. The weight in my chest had grown so familiar it felt like part of my body—an invisible organ made of grief.
This room used to mean hope.
When I first entered this pack house as Aldrake's wife, I believed this room would become my sanctuary—the place where I would be loved as the Luna of the Moonlight Pack. I had imagined laughter, whispered promises in the dark, arms that would pull me close when the world felt too heavy.
Now, it was nothing but a beautiful cage. A beautiful cage that suffocates me every single day.
I searched my memories for a single moment of happiness since becoming his wife.
Just one moment that didn't end in disappointment. One memory that didn't leave a bruise on my heart.
But there was none.
Every memory carried the same ending—me standing alone, watching the man I loved walk farther and farther away from me.
Tears blurred my vision just as the door swung open.
Aldrake entered without knocking, his presence cold and commanding, as if this room—and I—belonged to him. His eyes didn't soften when they met mine. They never did anymore.
He tossed a paper bag onto the bed like it was trash. It landed beside me like an insult. A slap on my face.
I opened it slowly and found a black dress inside. My heart betrayed me with a small, foolish flutter. For a second, I allowed myself to hope.
"There's a celebration tonight for the alliance between the Moonlight Pack and the Silvermoon Pack," he said flatly. "Wear that. Amber chose it, so don't ruin it. Try to look presentable."
Amber chose it. Not him. Never him.
"I didn't want to bring you," he added, as if stripping away what little dignity I had left, "but every Luna is required to attend. The Blood Moon Pack insisted you appear. Otherwise, Amber would have been a better choice."
A better choice. Not even his wife by right—yet still more worthy in his eyes.
"So behave yourself," he finished coldly. "Don't embarrass me."
Then he turned and walked out, as if he hadn't just shattered something fragile inside me.
The door closed behind him. And I broke once again. My heart shattered into a million shards of glass.
One tear fell. Then another.
His words replayed inside my head, sharp and merciless, until they felt like knives carving deeper into my chest.
Why do I stay?
Because I love him.
Because I am still in love with the man I married—the man who existed only in my memories now.
I stared at the dress in my hands and let out a hollow laugh.
Second choice.
Always second.
Still, I forced myself to stand.
I dressed carefully. I painted my lips, hid the shadows beneath my eyes, styled my hair to perfection. On the outside, I looked like a Luna worthy of standing beside an Alpha. On the inside, I felt like I was bleeding quietly.
When I descended the stairs, I prayed—stupidly—that maybe tonight he would look at me again.
Really look at me.
The sight waiting for me stole that hope and crushed it.
Aldrake sat on the couch, relaxed, his arm draped around Amber's shoulders. Her head rested against him as if it belonged there. Her fingers were laced with his.
She fit perfectly into his space.
Into my place.
My breath hitched.
Three years of marriage—and he had never held me like that.
"A-Aldrake…" My voice trembled, weak and small.
They both looked up.
Amber quickly straightened, pretending to be startled. "L-Livia… it's not what you think. I was feeling dizzy, and Aldrake just helped me."
Her lie was delicate. Pretty. Easy to believe—if I were blind.
"Don't explain," Aldrake said coldly. "There's nothing wrong with what you saw. If she's upset, that's her problem."
The words slammed into me.
"But what if she misunderstands?" Amber asked softly, eyes lowered like an innocent girl afraid of hurting someone.
"You did nothing wrong," he said gently to her. "You were unwell. That's all."
Then he turned to me, his gaze sharp and unforgiving. "Tell her you're not mad." He command.
I swallowed hard. "I'm not mad, Amber," I whispered. "There's nothing wrong."
The lie tasted like blood.
Amber smiled sweetly. "You're so kind, sister."
I turned away, afraid they would see how my hands were shaking.
Then Amber spoke again. "Are we leaving now, Aldrake? I mean—Alpha Aldrake?"
She stood beside him in a fitted white gown, glowing under the lights. She looked like a Luna. Like the Luna.
He smiled at her.
A real smile that never showed to me.
"How many times do I have to tell you to just call me Aldrake? You're not a stranger in this house."
Those words hurt more than any cruelty he had thrown at me before.
He had never spoken to me like that. He offered her his arm. And she took it.
They walked toward the door together.
Without me. Leaving me behind, like a ghost trying to be seen.
"W-wait…" The word slipped out before I could stop it.
He turned back with annoyance in his eyes. "What now?"
"N-nothing. Sorry."
And just like that, they left.
My wolf, Lilly, growled inside me.
> "You don't deserve this. Leave him."
"I can't," I whispered. "I love him."
> "He is breaking you."
"I know."
But I still followed them.
Before we entered the Silvermoon Pack's grand hall, Aldrake stopped and looked at me with warning in his eyes.
"After we show up, I'll be with Amber. I need to introduce her to important people."
Amber touched his arm gently. "Y-You don't have to do that. Livia is your wife."
For a heartbeat, hope dared to live inside me.
Then Aldrake smiled at Amber—the kind of smile I had been starving for.
"You deserve to be seen."
And something inside me finally cracked.
Not loudly.
Not dramatically.
Just a quiet break that no one noticed but me.
And I wondered…
if a heart can break so many times—
does it ever learn how to heal?