The shrill ring of the alarm clock shattered the silence of the cramped apartment, pulling Lana from a deep, heavy sleep. For a split second, she was somewhere else—somewhere safe —before the alarm sounded and drew her out.
Then, reality hit. The red "Past Due" stamp on the eviction notice on her nightstand stared at her, stacks of unpaid bills, an empty stomach, the kitchen, and fridge.
"Lord, I hate my life," she grumbled as she silenced the clock with a trembling hand, her heart already racing. Today was her last chance. She had secured an interview at the most prestigious firm in the city: Blackwood Enterprises, and the salary was enough to save her family.
"If I don't get this job today, I might as well come home and kill myself," she muttered groggily to herself as she got up from her little comfortable bed, which was the only property she hadn't sold yet.
As she pulled on her only professional suit and her black cover heels, she wore very little makeup, with a nude lip, she put her long ginger red hair in a bun, and very minimal jewelry, one necklace she never took off.
Satisfied with her look, Lana grabbed her bags and documents, rushing out in order to get there on time.
It wasn't a long ride, ten minutes, and Lana was parked in front of a large building.
The air changed from the gates; everything about the company screamed order and discipline.
The workers were dressed neatly, walked perfectly in line like models on runways, their necks long and heads held up straight.
"Hi". A chirpy voice startled her out of her thoughts. "I'm Eloise…are you here for the interview?"
"Hi. Yes, I am."Lana replied, turning to a hand already stretched out for a handshake. Lana shook the hand."I'm Lana Carlton, pleasure to meet you."
"pleasure's all mine, Goodluck!" Eloise said, walking away, she was the first happy person Lana had seen all day; everyone else looked like they had a stick up their ass.
She heard her name and walked into the interview room, muttering affirmations to herself, "You've got this, Lana. break a leg.
*****************
Roughly two minutes into the interview, Lana was introducing herself when she was interrupted by her anonymous interviewer. She was already confused as to why she was presenting to some weirdo who wouldn't even sit normally in his office …
"Cat got your tongue?" he said, calling her attention back to him. She looked back at the man; all she could see was the back of his brown curly hair wrapped in a bun.
Slowly, he turned around, asking the same question that got her thinking , "why do you want to work for Blackwood enterprises?" he asked. At least one thing hadn't changed, his strong British accent.
She knew the answer to the question; she had rehearsed it over and over, but now her head was empty, everything disappeared the moment she realized who sat in front of her, it was him.
Alistair Blackwood was sitting in front of her, looking as beautiful as always. He looked a bit different now, more masculine, the moustache, sharper jawline, darker eye bags showing he was stressed, but in a way it made him even hotter …
"I uh… uhm. " She tried to find words but couldn't.
"No," Alistair said, leaning over his massive mahogany desk and locking eyes with her
"What?" She was confused. Did she hear him clearly?
"No, you aren't hired, you can see yourself out, "he said nonchalantly, looking away from her onto the documents on his desk.
"But I haven't even said anything yet," Lana pointed out
"Exactly, your time is up, and all you did was stutter. Now, if you'll excuse me …" he said' getting up to leave, "I have more pressing issues to attend to".
Lana stopped him, standing in front of him immediately
"No, please, you can't leave, listen, I need this job." She pleaded desperately
"You need this job ?" he asked, looking her straight in the eyes. He wanted to piss her off so bad. He had finally gotten an opportunity to hurt her the way she had hurt him, and he was not about to miss it.
They both stared at each other in silence…it was so quiet that all Lana could hear was the annoying ticking of the wall clock and the subtle humming of the AC. The way he looked at her made her feel like filth, with so much anger and disgust.
He finally broke the silence, "There's no place for you here, Lana".
Lana's strength finally buckled. Her hands flew to her face, her palms pressing hard against her eyes as if she could push the reality of his words away. She bowed her head in defeat.
Alistair's voice drew her out of her thoughts. "Don't act shocked, Lana, you already knew you'd never fit into a place like this." his voice dropped to a low, dangerous silkiness as he leaned back to his chair. "However, I find myself in sudden need of domestic staff, someone to scrub the floors and stay out of sight."
"No..no i… I'm a first-class degree holder, you really don't expect that I'd work as a cleaner," a cleaner?
His eyes traveled over her slowly and predatorily, cataloging all her features, all the things that attracted him initially: her slim and slender figure, her chubby cheeks, beautiful hazel eyes, full lips, little nose, straight legs, and her smallish frame.
He still loved all those things, but he was about to use them against her. "Look at you."
The words dripping with a mix of anger and loathing, "You're skin and bone, I can see exhaustion written in the hollow of your eyes, you look like you haven't had a decent meal in years.
"One strong wind would snap you in half. You are in no position to negotiate here; you need a paycheck, I'm offering it, take it."
He was reading her poverty like a map, and she hated it; she knew he wanted to strip away whatever dignity she had left. Alistair had become a monster; he was a hollowed-out version of the boy she once knew, and she wasn't going to stand there and watch him insult her.
"You know what, Alistair, keep your job, keep your stupid money. I'd rather starve to death in the streets than spend another second breathing the same air as you."
She didn't wait for his retort. She turned on her heel, her movements sharp and jagged. "Go to hell," she spat over her shoulder, her hand gripping the heavy brass handle of his office door. She didn't just leave; she tore the door open, the sound echoing through the large hallway like a gunshot. "And take your 'domestic staff' position and fuck yourself with it!"
Alistair laughed as he watched her walk away. She still had a temper to her. He loved to watch her flare up a lot; it made her look cute.
It wasn't long before anger washed over him again. "That's right, walk away, that's what you always do."
***********************************
Back at Lana's apartment, she lay sprawled across her mattress, the springs groaning under her weight. She didn't remember the walk home. Her feet moved like they had a mind of their own, carrying her body through the crowded city streets while her mind remained trapped in that mahogany-lined cage of an office.
The ceiling of her apartment was mapped with water stains that looked like Rorschach blots, and the air smelled of damp wood and the cheap ramen she'd had for dinner three nights in a row.
The tears came in a jagged, choking storm. She buried her face in her pillow, the fabric soaking up the tears falling down her cheeks. Every "mean" thing he had said—skinny, hungry, cleaner—played over and over in her head, amplified by the silence of her empty room.
She closed her eyes in an attempt to sleep; maybe it'd reduce the pain
But as she lay there, a different memory began to make its way to the surface—one she had tried to bury under layers of justification. She remembered the night she broke him, and everything she said to him.
"Al, we can never be together, she had said, looking into his eyes, her voice echoing in the hollow hallway of her mind. She could still see the way his face had fallen, the light in his eyes dying out as she delivered the final blow: "I could never love you. You're a weight around my neck, and we're not fit for each other. Leave me alone, go! Move on, find some other girl who would be willing to take you. I never want to see you around me again."
More tears streamed down her eyes "I'm the real monster. Oh, Al, I had to do it, I had to let you go."
She whispered her words of apology over and over as she drifted off to sleep.