The sun was setting over Training Ground Three, casting long shadows over the three wooden posts.
Kakashi Hatake stood in the center, reading Icha Icha Violence with a bored expression. Across from him stood Sakura Haruno, looking determined, and Naruto Uzumaki, who was currently stretching his hamstrings while staring intensely at the spectator bench.
On that bench sat the audience: Jiraiya, Shizune, and the two most terrifying women in Konoha—Kushina and Tsunade.
Tsunade sat with her legs crossed, her arms folded under her chest, pushing her assets up in a way that defied gravity.
"He's staring at you again, Lady Tsunade," Shizune whispered nervously.
"Let him stare," Tsunade smirked, taking a sip from a travel flask of sake. "If he wants a closer look, he has to win."
The Fight Begins
"Ready... Start!" Kakashi announced, not looking up from his book.
Sakura immediately leaped back, punching the ground. "CHA!"
Debris flew everywhere. Kakashi vanished, reappearing on a tree branch. "Brute force. Good, Sakura. You've been training with the Hokage."
"Hey! Don't forget about me!"
Naruto didn't hide. He didn't use stealth. He stood right in the open.
"Shadow Clone Jutsu!"
Poof! Poof! Poof!
A dozen Narutos appeared. But they didn't charge. instead, they all posed like bodybuilders.
"Kakashi-sensei!" The real Naruto shouted, pointing a finger. "I know your weakness! It isn't Taijutsu... it isn't Genjutsu..."
Kakashi raised an eyebrow, his visible eye widening slightly. "Oh?"
"It's spoilers!" Naruto grinned wickedly. "I traveled with Pervy Sage for three years! I've read the manuscript for the next book! The main character, Make-Out Paradise, actually dies in the end because he—"
"AHHH! NO! LALALALA I CAN'T HEAR YOU!" Kakashi panicked, jamming his fingers in his ears and shutting his eyes tight to block out the Sharingan-reading lip movements.
"Now!" Naruto signaled.
While Kakashi was distracted by the threat of spoilers, the real Naruto flashed behind him. This was the speed of the Yellow Flash's son. No gimmicks this time.
Naruto didn't grab the bells. He grabbed Kakashi's vest and hurled him toward the ground.
"Sakura! Smash him!"
Sakura came down like a meteor, her fist glowing with chakra. Kakashi, eyes still squeezed shut, barely managed to substitute with a log, which splintered into toothpicks.
Kakashi reappeared by the river, sweating. He's fast. And he plays dirty. Just like Jiraiya.
The Serious Turn
Naruto landed on the water, standing perfectly still. The goofy grin vanished. He looked up at the spectator bench, locking eyes with Tsunade. He needed to show her the other side. The side worthy of her command.
He held out his right hand. Chakra began to swirl, but it wasn't just a normal Rasengan. It was dense, unstable.
"Big Ball Rasengan!"
He lunged. Kakashi had to put the book away. He pulled up his headband, revealing the Sharingan.
"Earth Style: Mud Wall!"
BOOM!
The impact shook the training ground. The mud wall shattered. Naruto burst through the dust, a clone acting as a springboard to launch him higher. He twisted in the air, snatching the bells from Kakashi's belt with his teeth as he flew past.
He landed in a crouch, the bells jingling in his mouth. He stood up, spit them into his hand, and tossed one to a stunned Sakura.
"Piece of cake," Naruto said, winking. Then he ruined the cool moment by scratching his butt. "Man, these new pants are tight."
The Verdict
Tsunade stood up. The air around her crackled. She walked down the grassy slope, her heels sinking into the soft earth. Kushina followed, looking proud but trying to hide it.
"You passed," Tsunade said, stopping in front of him.
Naruto beamed, sweat dripping down his face. "So? Did you see? I was awesome, right? I totally owned him!"
"You used a spoiler to distract an opponent," Tsunade said, her face stern. Then, a slow, predatory smile spread across her lips. "It was brilliant."
Naruto's face flushed. "So... about that reward?"
He stepped closer, his eyes dropping to her cleavage, then back to her eyes, then back to the cleavage. He practically vibrated with anticipation.
Tsunade chuckled. A low, throaty sound. She reached out and grabbed the front of his mesh shirt, yanking him forward so their noses almost touched. The scent of her—sake and magnolias—filled his head.
"You want a reward?" she whispered, loud enough for only him to hear.
"Yes. Please. Yes," Naruto nodded rapidly like a bobblehead.
"Meet me in the Hokage Tower tonight. Alone," she commanded. "If you're late... I'll have Anbu guard my door."
She let him go, shoving him back.
"Don't be late."
She turned and walked away, her hips swaying with a hypnotizing rhythm. Naruto watched her go, his jaw on the floor.
"NARUTO!"
Kushina's voice snapped him out of it. She had him in a headlock before he could blink.
"You did good, ya know!" She rubbed her knuckles into his scalp. "But don't think just because you passed, you can slack off! I'm making dinner tonight! You, me, and Sasuke. We're going to celebrate as a family!"
"Ow! Mom! Stahp!" Naruto laughed, trying to escape. "Wait, Sasuke is coming?"
"He better," Kushina said, her eyes darkening slightly. "Or I'll drag him there by his hair."
Dinner at the Uzumaki-Namikaze House
That evening, the house was loud. Kushina was cooking enough food for an army. Minato (in spirit, via a picture on the shrine) watched over them.
The door opened, and Sasuke Uchiha walked in.
He looked just as he did in the original timeline—high-collared blue shirt, white shorts, arm warmers. But his eyes were tired.
"I'm here," Sasuke muttered.
"Sasuke!" Naruto jumped up from the table, rushing over. He wrapped an arm around Sasuke's neck. "My little brother finally came out of his cave!"
"Get off me, loser," Sasuke grunted, but there was no real venom in it. He didn't push Naruto away. In this world, they were brothers in everything but blood. Kushina had practically adopted him after the massacre of his clan's leadership.
"Sit, Sasuke!" Kushina ordered, slamming a bowl of rice down.
As they ate, Naruto noticed Sasuke wasn't eating much.
"So," Naruto said, slurping his noodles. "I heard you're brooding again. Mom says you need a girlfriend. Or a hobby."
"I have a goal," Sasuke said coldly. "To kill him."
"Yeah, yeah, kill Itachi, restore the clan," Naruto waved a chopstick dismissively. "But you can't restore a clan if you don't know how to talk to girls. You should let me teach you. I have huge success with the ladies."
Sasuke looked at him deadpan. "You just stare at the Hokage's chest."
"It's a strategic stare!" Naruto argued. "I'm assessing the village's assets!"
Sasuke almost smiled. Almost.
"Whatever," Sasuke said, standing up. "I'm going for a walk."
"Don't stay out too late," Kushina warned softly. "You have a mission tomorrow too. Team 7 is back in business."
The Tower at Midnight
Naruto waited until his mom went to sleep. Then, he slipped out the window.
He raced across the rooftops, his heart pounding harder than it did during the fight with Kakashi. He reached the Hokage Tower. The lights were still on in the top office.
He climbed the wall and tapped on the glass.
Tsunade was sitting at her desk, a single lamp lit. She looked up, saw him, and pointed to the window latch. Open it.
Naruto slid the window up and hopped inside. "I'm here. I'm not late."
Tsunade spun her chair around to face him. She had taken off her green haori. Now she was just in the grey mesh armor and the sleeveless kimono top.
"Lock the door," she ordered.
Naruto gulped and locked it.
"Come here," she said.
Naruto walked over, his legs feeling like jelly. He stopped in front of her. Tsunade looked up at him, her eyes heavy and dark.
"You proved you're strong today," she said softly. "But you're still a pervert."
"I can't help it," Naruto whispered, his gaze drifting down. "You're... perfect."
Tsunade smiled. She spread her knees slightly, pulling him in to stand between her legs. She grabbed his waist.
"Since you like them so much," she murmured, guiding his hands. "You can touch. Just once. Consider it... motivation for your next mission."
Naruto's brain short-circuited. "R-Really?"
"Don't make me repeat myself," she snapped, her dominant streak flaring.
Naruto reached out, his hands trembling, and placed them gently on the curves he had dreamed about for two years. They were soft, warm, and incredible. He let out a whimper of pure happiness.
"Good boy," Tsunade whispered, leaning her head forward to rest against his stomach, closing her eyes. For a moment, she wasn't the Hokage. She was just a woman finding comfort in the one person who looked at her with pure, unadulterated want.
"Now," she said, pulling back and slapping his hands away before he could get too comfortable. "Get out. Gaara of the Sand is in trouble. We received a distress hawk. You leave at dawn."
Naruto blinked, the whiplash of emotions hitting him. "Gaara?"
"The Akatsuki have him," Tsunade said, her face hardening into the Hokage's mask again. "Go save him, Naruto. Show me that my champion can save a Kage."
Naruto straightened up. The pervert was gone; the Commander was back.
"I'll bring him back," Naruto vowed. "For you."