The group gathered in front of a massive swimming pool. The water was about twenty feet deep, with Trainer platforms on either side and several floating pads on the surface for Pokémon to stand on.
"This is the official Cerulean Gym arena~~!"
Daisy, the oldest sister, struck a confident pose. The aura of a "strong" Trainer (or so she thought) radiated from her, causing a bead of sweat to roll down Ash's face. He told himself not to get careless.
"Violet, I choose you!" Daisy shouted, as if she were tossing out her most prized Pokémon.
Violet blinked. "Huh? Sis, I'm exhausted. Besides, my Pokémon were completely thrashed by the last challenger. They're still in the ICU."
"But Big Sis, my Pokémon were wiped out by a different guy too," the youngest, Lily (Penny), added with an innocent shrug.
The two older sisters shared a look, then slowly turned their gaze toward the third sister. "Third Sis, it's all on you! The glory of the Cerulean Gym rests on your shoulders!"
Lily: "???" The problem was, her Pokémon had been turned into sashimi by a challenger too!
These three were so obsessed with their underwater ballet shows that they'd long since thrown daily Pokémon training out the window. Rumors were swirling around Kanto that Cerulean was the weakest Gym in the region—and those weren't just rumors; they were facts.
Ash stood there, jaw-dropped. So, what now? Are they fighting or not?
"Oh well... the show is more important anyway. Let's just give him the badge and call it a day~~" The three sisters reached a unanimous decision.
This flippant attitude hit Ash where it hurt. This was the Gym challenge he had dreamed of! How could they treat it so lightly? He grabbed Brock by the arm, hoping this buff warrior could teach these clueless women a lesson about the soul of a Trainer.
"He is a Trainer from the Pewter Gym, a man with the Will of Rock—Brock! Show them your resolve and conquer their hearts!"
Brock frowned as he looked at the three beauties. He leaned back, his voice losing its usual gravelly edge. "Actually, I think..."
"Speak up! Haven't you eaten yet?!" Ash let out a Snarl.
Brock: "..."
After a moment of internal turmoil, Brock cracked his neck, snapped his eyes open, and growled, "This is wrong! You can't just have one foot in the door and the other out!"
Ash nodded in approval. That's the man I know.
"Our Pewter City has a massive plot of undeveloped land," Brock continued. "If you three don't mind, you could move your theater there. Focus on the ballet and give up being a Gym. That would be for the best."
Ash: "?"
"Furthermore, I am a man with Pewter City residency. If you three want to become Pewter citizens, you just need to add your names to my household registry. As for me personally, I don't mind..."
The sisters: "..."
After some discussion, the Cerulean trio reluctantly released a Pokémon, claiming it was their final combatant.
Splap. Splap. It was a pink-and-white goldfish with a horn on its head and thick, make-up-like lips, currently performing a tragic Splash on the dry floor.
Pokédex: "Beep-beep. Goldeen, a common-as-dirt fish Pokémon. Steaming it with ginger is the best way to serve it."
The Pokédex never missed a chance to flex its sass.
Ash's brow furrowed deep. At this rate, Pikachu wouldn't even need to move; the Goldeen would faint from exhaustion just by Splashing around. Ash had spent all day memorizing type advantages, intending to use his Electric-type Pikachu for a glorious, honorable match. Instead, the universe refused to give him a proper type-matchup. Damn it!
Daisy sighed and clapped her hands. A cute Seel popped its head out of the pool. This was the mascot; it didn't fight. It opened its mouth, revealing an elegant, teardrop-shaped badge resting on its tongue.
"Your Pikachu looks like a beast," Daisy said. "We're clearly no match for you. Just take the proof of our defeat: the Cascade Badge."
Ash hesitated. Winning a badge this easily felt... wrong. Honestly, he'd rather not have it. Kanto was an old-school region; they had plenty of Gyms. He could just go find another one.
Just as Ash was about to decline, a sharp cry echoed from across the pool.
"Daisy! Let me take the Gym battle in your place!"
Everyone turned to see Misty standing on the far side of the arena.
"Haven't you eaten?! Louder! I can't hear you!" Ash shouted back. Seriously, the acoustics in this place sucked.
Misty: "..."
She sprinted over, snatched the Cascade Badge from Daisy's hand, and held it high in front of Ash. "Cerulean Gym has never had a precedent for giving away a badge without a fight. I'll finish the challenge for them!"
"Actually, I gave one away for free yesterday," Daisy noted.
Misty: "..." (Whose side are you on?!)
After a quick explanation, Ash learned that Misty was the youngest of the four sisters, often "selectively forgotten" because she hadn't "developed" yet.
"Hey Misty, didn't you say you wouldn't come back until you were a great Trainer? It's been like two weeks," Daisy teased. "Even so, we aren't letting you join the ballet. You're too 'green'~~"
"Who wants to do that useless ballet anyway?!" Misty's face turned beet red as she glared at her sisters. She'd rather starve than dance underwater!
"Small chest, big temper," Lily added a finishing blow.
Misty: "!!!"
Just as a classic "plastic sisters" catfight was about to erupt, Ash and Brock pulled them apart. "I don't care! As long as someone fights me, I'm in!" Ash declared.
Soon, Ash and Misty were stationed at opposite ends of the arena. Brock stood on the sidelines, still trying to recruit the sisters. "Seriously, consider Pewter City. Our potential is huge. Last year, we were voted one of Kanto's top 10 cities for cemetery aesthetics..."
"Kanto has an 11th city...?" the sisters blinked.
At the pool:
"Pikachu, I choose you!" Ash took the lead. He'd studied the type-chart for a whole day; today, he was invincible!
"Pika." However, Pikachu looked hesitant. It scampered behind Ash's leg, making it clear it was just here to spectate. It didn't zap family members (except for Ash, but that was "electro-therapy love").
"As expected of my Pikachu! I didn't feed you those Rare Candies for nothing!" Misty laughed, hands on her hips. She knew Ash's Pokémon inside and out, but he'd never seen her fight. Without his ace Pikachu... she was the one who was invincible!
"Damn it!" Ash ruffled his hair. Pikachu always dropped the ball at the critical moment. He tossed out his next choice.
In a flash of red, a vivid green Pokémon appeared on a floating pad, as immovable as a mountain. Metapod—nickname: Rayquaza. Undefeated record. Ash's ultimate savior.
"Then I choose you! Staryu!" Misty cried.
A star-shaped brown Pokémon appeared, a brilliant ruby embedded in its center.
Pokédex: "Beep-beep. Staryu, the Starshape Pokémon. Hermaphroditic; it can literally start its own civilization by itself."
Misty: "..." (Crap! I forgot about this disgusting Pokédex!)