Konoha Main Encampment, Infirmary.
~Tsunade POV, sometime after the attack against Iwagakure's main base~
Tsunade's expression faltered as she watched over Soutarou who was struggling with killing so many people, and mourning them. Tsunade softly looked at Soutarou who was whispering forgiveness for killing Onoki's son, and numerous Iwa shinobi. She looked over at Kushina and thought, 'So it turns out he's a real big softie… that said… he killed too much… of the ten thousand stationed Iwa shinobi… he slaughtered nearly four thousands of them. By the time we made it to the battlefield, we were just picking off escaping squadrons. We made a mistake… I forgot… He's just a child… I forgot that he shouldn't even be on the battlefield… and worst of all I forgot that he's just a kind person who hates killing, instead we arrogantly and demandingly made him kill when I could tell he was going to hesitate. I got so lost in my anger that he might have manipulated me. I forgot that I was the one who began to care for him in secret, without any connection. This system just created a situation for us to meet…'
'And in my anger I expected too much from him… I should have been there with him… His actions did do something… Onoki did finally surrender after the final casualty count was tallied, but Onoki bluntly said this grudge won't be forgotten. Look at how merciful you were, if you were really as ruthless as you claim, why would you even let so many flee…? We had Onoki's mind read, and we got to see the whole battle, as for his state secrets… all of his memory is sealed almost. No matter… We'll send him back to Iwa after negotiations. I'm guessing you left him alive, Soutarou, because you couldn't bring yourself to kill the crutch of Iwa…. without Onoki Iwa really would collapse. As for the other five thousand of Iwa's forces they all made a full retreat to Iwagakure and turtled up inside.'
Tsunade glanced at Soutarou in a slight apology, 'I forgot what kind of person you really were, I'm sorry, but at this point all I can do is seal your memory and begin the therapy process.'
Tsunade called out, "Kushina… Let's do it… For Soutarou's sake."
Kushina looked at Tsunade in surprise and said, "Aren't you-?"
Tsunade shook her head and said, "Soutarou's always been a kind person. I just forgot that in my anger… he's a soft person who tries to put up a strong front person. And I led him to slaughter Iwa ninja the way he did, because I was angry at him… It's all my fault that he's turned into a sorrowful-…"
Kushina shook her head and said, "No… It's my fault too… We had too many expectations… Soutarou has always been the kindest person… I forgot that… the system's manipulations blinded us… Though Sister Tsunade I don't think we should seal his memory, he can overcome this… I believe in him. So let's have a little faith, he just needs a little time to digest… he's not like grandma mito who lived through the Sengoku (warring states) era… Even I was afraid of the level of bloodshed Soutarou did… forget him who felt the blood splatter on his armor and his hands… I can't imagine it."
Tsunade nodded, "I can't either… So it's a combination of everything… I guess grandfather succeeded in one aspect… Children aren't used to war anymore… But Soutarou… He really isn't meant to be a shinobi…"
Kushina nodded and said, "No he's not… he's meant to be a hero. The Hero of Konoha."
Kushina grabbed Soutarou's hand and rubbed the back of his palms before intertwining fingers with him, making Tsunade make a scowling face. So she jumped to his side and did the same.
~Soutarou POV~
'You killed them.'
'You had a choice.'
'You could've chosen to show power, without killing.'
Soutarou's mind felt like it was fracturing, his mind flashed with scenes of his previous world, as he thought back to the First World War and the Second World War. He thought of the concentration camps, he thought of the mass genocides, and then… his slaughter of the Iwa Main Encampment. He pretended to be Madara, only to realize he couldn't even play Hashirama, who could ruthlessly attack his best friend for the village.
Soutarou's eyes remained glazed over as he thought, 'Was it really worth it? I see now… There are no winners… Only losers… What a tragedy… I thought this new life would be a path to peace… that… that…'
A soft voice interrupted his thoughts, maternal, but also not, yet soft all the same. Soutarou hazily looked up to meet with a surprising scene… Mito. Mito had arrived, crossed battlefields and next to her was Naori who wore a worried expression. Mito sighed deeply and sat softly on the edge of the infirmary bed. Her voice pleasantly called out, "Soutarou. Soutarou."
Soutarou looked over, but failed to meet her gaze, 'I deceived them too… Have I done nothing right?'
Soutarou's head drooped and his shoulders slumped as he waited for a questioning demand, a slight reprimand, but instead Tsunade scoped him into a hug, joined by Mito, Naori, and Kushina. The group of four hugged Soutarou, and Mito then brushed Soutarou's hair gently and said, "Soutarou… You did good, I'm proud of you. But right now I need you to stand strong. I need a strong Soutarou to protect all these Konoha shinobi. Because if not you, then who? So… So, for me can you put on your strong face and get out there raise Konoha's morale and help raise our defensive positions before following this clone of mine to the Sungakure offensive?"
Soutarou began to clear slightly, but he wavered and said in a mutter, "But I failed you… I deceived you… I deceived you all… I'm not strong enough… So many dead… I killed them all… I don't want to kill anymore…"
Mito's eyes turned hesitant before she said, "You don't have to kill Soutarou anymore. I just need your help to support me and Naori. So… So we can crush Sungakure and begin the end of this accursed war. Soutarou… You didn't deceive me either… Your heart… Your heart was always pure, perhaps your intentions got slightly muddled because of that 'being'. But you truly care for all of us, even now. So right now, my main body is trying and struggling to break through the barriers of Sungakure and I need your help, your protection to ensure I can do it. You don't need to kill mercilessly, you don't need to kill endlessly, you don't even need to kill if someone tries to kill you, but I ask that you at least kill when someone tries to hurt Kushina. When someone tries to hurt Tsunade. When someone tries to hurt Naori. And if you care for me then please extend that to me now, I need your strength. I can't do it alone. So if you can't bear to kill for your own or yourself, kill for others, to protect Konoha, to protect those that we love and hold dear."
Soutarou's eyes cleared a bit more, but he couldn't find the strength to argee and in the end he said, "I don't want to kill… but I'll t-try to protect you. I promise… Mito… Mito-nee-chan…"
Mito sighed heavily and shook her head as a signal to the others and just pressed his head on her bosom and gently stroked his hair and said softly, "That's enough. Just rest, you didn't do anything wrong… If you hadn't been killed… Iwa shinobi would've hurt Tsunade, they would've hurt or even killed Kushina… They would have killed your aunty Momoka Senju… They would have killed your uncle Sekiro Senju… They would have… they would have… they could have… would have… could have… have…"
Mito continued naming every acquaintance Soutarou knew and finished saying, "But I won't justify it any further… You simply did the right thing. You know even to this day I regret my first kill. But I killed because if I didn't my cousin would die. Because if I didn't, someone else important to me would die. So I killed and I'll still kill without hesitation, not for the concept of a village, not for a material goal, but for those I love and hold close…"
Mito slowly tapped her pointer finger against Soutarou's heart and said, "That's the unfortunate reality of our shinobi world. Hashirama and Madara saw it and tried to change it. They failed. I acknowledge that. So we the next ones carrying the torch forward, must take their lesson, must take their experience and learn from it. By standing on the shoulders of giants we can still fix this cursed problem. That children have to be sent to the battlefield, even if they're older than before, that peace is always temporary, that we must always shed blood to protect those we love. Instead this one last time we have to take a stand and rip off the bandage, air out the wound, rather than letting it fester, and slaughter to protect those we love and to fix this problem. You told Onoki this, that this was the eternal dream. So help me Soutarou. You're my only hope."
Soutarou's fingers twitched and his eyebrows twitched momentarily before relaxing and he stared into Mito's emerald eyes before resting his head on her bosom.
'That… That line… it was from star wars right… Help me Obi Wan Kenobi. You're my only hope….'
Soutarou's gaze cleared up slowly, but surely with Mito's clone taking the charge the others just cleared out of the room. Soutarou eventually softly pushed Mito's clone away saying weakly, "Send in everyone else… I'm fine now."
After nearly two hours of soothing Soutarou alone Mito's clone finally stepped out and brought everyone back. Tsunade immediately rushed forward and buried Soutarou in her bosom trying to replicate her grandmother, only to cause Soutarou to gasp for air and subtly glare at her.
'Getting choked by boobage… suffering from success… '
Soutarou slowly, but thematically tapped Tsunade's arm telling her or attempting to tell her to let him go.
Eventually Mito's clone pried her off and said, "I'll leave him in your hands, I'll finish up the clean up efforts here."
Tsunade nodded, while Kushina grit her teeth and put her hands on her chest, while Naori also glanced at Mito's chest and then Tsunade's and formed a silent "O" in realization. All before Naori glanced at her own chest and lit up thinking,
Naori took to Soutarou's side and soothed him, but decidedly did something rather horrifying. She began casting her Mangekyo Genjutsu on him and due to his erratic mental state her Genjutsu landed and she silently focused her ocular power as much as she could before using her ocular technique within the Genjutsu.